So I still haven't heard back from HP email support, but I installed the new 6110 AIO driver on my machine and, low and behold, I can scan again! Definitely some interface improvements to HP Director and HP Scan. Before, HP Scan was very clunky, with lots of beachball time and sometimes it would crop images for no apparent reason. To quote the most horrible Mac cliché in history, the interface is much snappier now. HP Director launches by default after you install, but it no longer has a window. It hangs out in the dock and has a right-click menu with all of the devices functions on it.
So... I'm still pissed that HP's worthless driver update emails that I signed up for didn't even notify me. I'm still pissed that email tech hasn't written me back. But, my 6110 is fully functional again, so I guess that's all I can ask for today.