Memory manufacturers usually know what they're talking about when they recommend a specific part for a specific computer. They take into account a lot of pretty arcane specifications like 'column strobe latency' (you usually see mention of something like "CL 2.5" in the detailed specs), and of course the actual response time of the memory chips used on each SODIMM. Take their advice, or be prepared to put up with a screwy iBook.
Fortunately, the only thing that will probably happen if you use the wrong RAM is that you'll have a crash or two-it won't blow up your computer.