First, calling someone a "bastard" isn't the best way to introduce yourself and ask for help.
That rude comment aside, what's so bland about the information on the Internet? Perhaps you haven't looked around enough or in the right places. Try
Cocoa Dev Central or
StepWise for starters. The
Vermont Recipes tutorial is an introduction to building an interface. Also,
OmniGroup lets you use download and use their frameworks for free and has mailing lists (and online archives) for developers. Of course, there's also Apple's
Sample Code and
Getting Started pages.
I'd suggest you start small with some simpler programs to get your feet wet before you start on this much larger project you seem to have in mind.
[ 07-12-2001: Message edited by: starfleetX ]