Well then at least I'm not insane. At the same time, it's my iPhone having the brain fart.
I do not have any setting for remote speakers in the settings; there is nothing listed below the libraries in the app itself, and no "Remote" all listed in the general settings.
I'll try removing it and reinstalling.
I removed the app from the iPhone and iTunes, and reinstalled it from iTMS. Nothing...on the settings screen, I see the options for choosing a library, with one library listed; the on om my iMac. The next section is the "Stay connected" option, turned off.
In the general settings for the iPhone in general, I see many apps listed, but no "Remote" app.
In the iTunes preferences, in the "devices" tab, I have the box for looking for remote speakers selected. I can select remote speakers on my Apple TV (my Airport Express is having trouble, but the option is still there).
???