[Superman610]

Hello. I’ve been asked to do an advertising image for a magazine. The person is inviting people to join a contest, and he wanted me to do a picture for him. So please tell me what you think before I show it to him. Maybe I should fix something up. Thank you.

[andi*pandi]

it needs more punchy copywriting, and the red on dark grey is hard to read, and needs more leading. The URL is too tight to the bottom and to the ring, needs more breathing room.

Photographers and Designers—
Submit your work to the World of the Rings Contest!

and why should they bother going to the link unless they know what the prize is? Deadline? More info necessary.

[Big Mac]

Agreed.

[duoikari]

i think that the background is a bit too over powering for me. I'd make it a bit more transparent if i were you, or use a different image all together. I also don't quite understand what the ring with a tomato is surpose to symbolise

[Sherman Homan]

I also don't quite understand what the ring with a tomato is surpose to symbolise

Let's start here: tomatoes are members of the deadly nightshade family.
Next!

[art_director]

Before you do anything to this poster ( ? ) you need to sit down and prioritize what you're trying to say. Then you need an idea. The idea can be a killer visual, a killer line, a combo of the two, whatever but it needs an idea. Then you need a layout that communicates your idea quickly and clearly.

When Apple ran the famous 1984 spot they knew what they wanted to say: This computer, the Apple Computer, is different from anything else you've ever seen. It's a revolution.

They could have run an ad with a bunch of charts, graphs, statistics and general BS about processors, interface, etc. The kind of stuff crap that gets thrown around in board rooms. Fortunately Chiat Day ( Apple's agency at the time ) knew that wasn't Apple and, more importantly, such messages don't resonate with consumers. They need something to laugh / be touched by -- something to remember. They need an idea.

Some may argue that comparing your poster to the 1984 spot is a stretch. I would argue that that TV spot exemplifies creative, effective, breakthrough communication. If all advertisers were open to and demanding such work we'd see much better commercials and more successful products in the marketplace.

Damn, drank too much and fell off my soapbox...

[Randman]

The copy is really bad. The red is hard to read on the background, and there's too much red. Also, the fonts should have a little weight, making World of the Rings larger than the rest.

Image-wise, I think a shot of the Earth in a ring setting makes more sense than a tomato.

[Superman610]

[Randman]

Same text, which basically sucks. Who is inviting photographers and designers? The text is also bland, why in the hell would anyone want to join? The tomato in the bowl-ring also looks too dang odd and makes no sense whatsoever.

Still, lots of red in the text and now an italic W in World, which again makes no sense.

My opinion, unless there has to be a reason for the visual, rethink the entire ad.

Oh, and an italic v as well. As in very confusing and looking a bit amateurish. Sorry to sound harsh.

You want to draw people in, not make them confused.

[art_director]

a. You still lack an idea.

b. You're not telling people what 'World of the Rings' is. BTW, WTF is it? You want people to design rings? You want people to look at designed rings and vote? You want people to drink warm bile from the left shoe of Tom Jones?

At very least you need to give them a reason to go online and look it up. Sorry but consumers aren't sitting around waiting for your URL and contest. You need to attract them.

c. If you want to attract designers then give them a well-designed ad. To designers this is wallpaper unworthy of consideration.

Sorry for the brutal honesty.

[Thorzdad]

art_director, as usual, nails it perfectly.
This ad simply isn't going to attract anyone remotely creative or professional. Honest.

But, the main thing fighting you is the promotion itself, and that's out of your control.
I see ads for these "contests" inviting designers, photographers, illustrators, etc. to submit free concepts all the time. A new one pops up on some of the illustration and design boards I belong to every week. We ignore them. They are BS scams designed to suck in as much free art as possible. At least that's how anyone I know reacts to them. Sorry.

And, honestly, the tomato ring simply doesn't work. If your concept requires the viewer to go off and do research into what botanical family the tomato belongs to (as suggested by Sherman Homan), then it's a complete failure.

[shandaman]

The white BG looks way better, good job!

[JennPav]

I have to agree with the crits you got so far. I don't really get it, you know? Why a tomato? If you had a good idea with the tomato ring and it means something to you, make it more clear to the audience. Try to step away from it and see it through the eyes of someone who knows absolutely nothing about what you're doing this for. Maybe explain to us your idea and we can help you go from there.