[Spliff]

Actor Tom Sizemore Fails Drug Test with Fake Penis

Entertainment - Reuters Celebrity/Gossip

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actor Tom Sizemore has been jailed for violating his probation by failing a drug test after he was caught trying to use a prosthetic penis to fake the results, a Los Angeles County prosecutor said on Friday.

Sizemore, 43, who played a battle-hardened sergeant in the war movie "Saving Private Ryan," was placed in custody on Thursday. He was ordered to remain behind bars until a hearing on Feb. 24, unless he posts $25,000 bond, Deputy District Attorney Sean Carney said.

Last month, Judge Antonio Baretto had agreed to allow Sizemore to travel to Cambodia to shoot a new film on condition that he pass a drug test every day prior to his departure.

Carney said the actor's failed attempt to fake his drug test results came on the first day of the new requirement.

The actor is required to undergo random drug tests as a condition of probation for his convictions on separate charges of methamphetamine possession and beating his ex-girlfriend, former Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss.

During Thursday's proceedings, prosecutors told Judge Baretto that Sizemore failed three drug tests in three days, the first after he was caught using a fake penis sewn into his boxer shorts and filled with a clean urine sample kept warm by a heating pack.

Carney said the ruse was revealed when the temperature of the sample proved too cool to have come from Sizemore's body, and he was asked to remove his pants.

According to prosecutors, Sizemore had been caught once before trying to use a similar device, sold over the Internet under the brand name the Whizzinator, and had failed drug tests on at least five occasions.

Carney said two drug tests on the days following the fake penis incident showed Sizemore had methamphetamine in his system.

During the hearing, Sizemore's lawyer told the court that his client was destitute, living in a garage in Whittier, California, and that he was an expectant father, Carney told Reuters.

But Baretto told Sizemore that his drug use was "out of control," adding, "I had hoped and wanted to see a positive performance."

Source

[Spliff]

The funniest thing (for me) about this story is how Tom Sizemore obviously ripped of the movie, Withnail & I in which Withnail tries to beat a drunk driving charge by almost exactly the same method.

[Rev-O]

"According to prosecutors, Sizemore had been caught once before trying to use a similar device, sold over the Internet under the brand name the Whizzinator."

Linky

At least it comes in a variety of colors...

[Luca Rescigno]

Wow, sounds like this guy's a real prince.

Honestly, I had never heard of him and when I read the title I was pretty sure it was a porn actor.

[Mafia]

YES, WE SELL DEHYDRATED URNIE SEPARATLEY

[Rev-O]

Think of the laughs you could have with the whizzinator. Fill it full of apple juice, and then, at an appropriate moment, whip out you prosthetic unit, piss in a cup, and drink it. It'd be a hit at nice eating establishments. Or fill it full of beer and do the same trick at a bar. Complain loudly that "beer here is too damn expensive! I'm gonna get my money's worth!" or perhaps "The beer here tastes like piss! Here, I'll prove it!" Oh, the possibilities are endless.

[paully dub]

The Tom Sizemore legend grows. I applaud the man, the effort.

[ManOfSteal]

Brilliant. Truly, this is the sign of a pure genius people...

[RonnieoftheRose]

Originally posted by Spliff:

News for you - Richard loves Macs.

[demograph68]

Wow, him?!? I knew he looked familiar. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0163988/

[sugar_coated]

Next version of whizzinator will keep urine warm.

[Apple Pro Underwear]

http://gonumber1.com/her.htm


for her????

EXPLAIN.

[dracoleb]

Guess he was wearing that thing for more than 8 hours. Almost worth buying for that apple juice idea.

[Eriamjh]

His name is Size-more? That makes it even funnier.

[Athens]

lol what a loser.

[Diggory Laycock]

"I assure you officer.. I have only had a few light ales...."
"You can't do this.... my cousin's a QC!"

He clearly got the idea from Withnail - the temperature is a new one though.

Now - who do you go to in order to buy a rubber ****?

[Spliff]

Originally posted by Diggory Laycock:
"I assure you officer.. I have only had a few light ales...."
"You can't do this.... my cousin's a QC!"

"Get in the back of the van!"

[Mafia]

Originally posted by Diggory Laycock:
"I assure you officer.. I have only had a few light ales...."
"You can't do this.... my cousin's a QC!"

He clearly got the idea from Withnail - the temperature is a new one though.

Now - who do you go to in order to buy a rubber ****?

http://www.thewhizzinator.com/

[turtle777]

Mwahahahaha.

-t