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JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 19, 2005, 03:31 PM

Our source deep inside Apple has leaked to ThinkSecret an EXCLUSIVE picture of the new eMac. Apple has eliminated the need for a mouse, as you can now move the cursor along the screen by using a combination of clickwheel movements. The top right clickwheel moves the mouse up and down, the top left clickwheel moves the cursor left and right, and, for more advanced users. the bottom clickwheel moves the cursor in diagonal directions. Furthermore, the top left clickwheel can be programmed to "right click" eliminating the need for the ctrl-click. The unit is supported by a stand made out of iPod shuffles. Apparently Apple is expecting the product to be a big hit and is going to promote it with celebrity endorsements.

Ghoser777 · Feb 19, 2005, 03:36 PM

Oh man, I'd hit it.

Lateralus · Feb 19, 2005, 03:37 PM

The eMac or Michael?

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 19, 2005, 03:40 PM

hmm, that's a good question... perhaps both

Cody Dawg · Feb 19, 2005, 03:55 PM

Just make sure you have "Jesus Juice" handy.

alphasubzero949 · Feb 19, 2005, 03:58 PM

Originally posted by Lateralus:
The eMac or Michael?

Cadaver · Feb 19, 2005, 04:40 PM

Originally posted by Cody Dawg:
Just make sure you have "Jesus Juice" handy.

As long as its not "Michael Juice!"

Cody Dawg · Feb 19, 2005, 04:55 PM

LOL!

Actually, he took wine and put it into soda cans and called it "Jesus Juice" so that the kids would drink it. He told them that since Jesus drank it they could drink it also.

CD Hanks · Feb 19, 2005, 04:59 PM

I sometimes wonder why the hell I keep coming back here.

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 19, 2005, 05:06 PM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
I sometimes wonder why the hell I keep coming back here.

because you're depressed, maybe?

CD Hanks · Feb 19, 2005, 05:20 PM

Originally posted by JohnSmithXTREME:
because you're depressed, maybe?

No, I've been far worse and have not come here.

I think it's the high ratio of blathering idiots to normal people that spikes my neurotic tendencies and makes me go apeshit here. At the very least, I know it's having some effect. I guess that's why I keep coming back?

Oh, and this thread is stupid.

Mafia · Feb 19, 2005, 05:34 PM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
and this thread is stupid.

MacGorilla · Feb 19, 2005, 05:35 PM

Apple Pro Underwear · Feb 19, 2005, 06:09 PM

Alcohol is not responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children. Michael Jackson is responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children.

sugar_coated · Feb 19, 2005, 09:03 PM

Everyone, please be informed that the parent post is an ineffectual parody.

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 04:40 AM

Originally posted by sugar_coated:
Everyone, please be informed that the parent post is an ineffectual parody.

Not even. You haven't been here anywhere near long enough to see all the crap threads/posts this prig has made.

Randman · Feb 20, 2005, 04:43 AM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
Not even. You haven't been here anywhere near long enough to see all the crap threads/posts this prig has made.

Yep. Actually, I usually avoid posts he creates just to save myself from extra-strength stupidity.
Looking at this thread only confirms that belief.

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 20, 2005, 04:56 AM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
Not even. You haven't been here anywhere near long enough to see all the crap threads/posts this prig has made.

you say that because you love me, but you are frustrated that our parents would never approve of our marriage.

sideus · Feb 20, 2005, 05:22 AM

eMac?

rozwado1 · Feb 20, 2005, 06:46 AM

Originally posted by Apple Pro Underwear:
Alcohol is not responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children. Michael Jackson is responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children.

I blame Jesus. MJ was too good of an 80's pop star...

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 06:46 AM

Originally posted by JohnSmithXTREME:
you say that because you love me, but you are frustrated that our parents would never approve of our marriage.

I rest my case.

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 20, 2005, 06:55 AM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
I rest my case.

I've really lost my touch. Back in the early days of MacNN, I could really illicit hatred from people with lame photoshop/mspaint drawings. But, it's been like 3 years since I've posted this type of flamebait, and I'm really let down. People used to say things like "I hate this picture so much, I wish I could kill you and rape your dead body!" But alas, all the angriest nerds on MacNN have left, and the worst reactions I can get are "this is stupid" or "in before lock."

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 06:58 AM

Originally posted by JohnSmithXTREME:
I've really lost my touch. Back in the early days of MacNN, I could really illicit hatred from people with lame photoshop/mspaint drawings. But, it's been like 3 years since I've posted this type of flamebait, and I'm really let down. People used to say things like "I hate this picture so much, I wish I could kill you and rape your dead body!" But alas, all the angriest nerds on MacNN have left, and the worst reactions I can get are "this is stupid" or "in before lock."

You've always been stupid, and the crowd has simply matched your abilities.

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 20, 2005, 06:59 AM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
You've always been stupid, and the crowd has simply matched your abilities.

I'd be careful what you say about the crowd. After all, you're part of it.

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 07:14 AM

Originally posted by JohnSmithXTREME:
I'd be careful what you say about the crowd. After all, you're part of it.

Never said I wasn't.

Randman · Feb 20, 2005, 07:19 AM

Maybe you two ought to pm or chat or get a hotel room or something. All of that unbridled sexual tension between you two.

Sheesh.

JohnSmithXTREME · Feb 20, 2005, 08:10 AM

My lust for CD Hanks is out in the open now. Do you see my signature? I like to pretend that I am Ryan (on the left) and CD Hanks is Seth (on the right, for all you non OC watchers). I just know those two are more than "buddies"

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 09:58 AM

Originally posted by JohnSmithXTREME:
My lust for CD Hanks is out in the open now. Do you see my signature? I like to pretend that I am Ryan (on the left) and CD Hanks is Seth (on the right, for all you non OC watchers). I just know those two are more than "buddies"

Fine, you can take the giraffe, and I'll take bin Laden.

ARE YOU HAPPY NOW THAT YOU'VE RIPPED OUT MY HEART IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE, YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD?

willed · Feb 20, 2005, 10:06 AM

I feel dirty and used for just having wasted precious seconds of my life reading this shitty thread.

Psychonaut · Feb 20, 2005, 10:12 AM

Damn Michael Jackson for his rugged good looks!

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 11:35 AM

Originally posted by willed:
I feel dirty and used for just having wasted precious seconds of my life reading this shitty thread.

They weren't that precious if the majority of that time is spent here.

nforcer · Feb 20, 2005, 02:25 PM

Originally posted by Apple Pro Underwear:
Alcohol is not responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children. Michael Jackson is responsible for Michael Jackson's molesting of children.

You are correct. Alcohol is just responsible for drunk drivers killing people, people killing other people, people killing themselves, and loads of other stupid behavior.

rozwado1 · Feb 20, 2005, 03:18 PM

Originally posted by nforcer:
Alcohol is just responsible for loads of other stupid behavior.

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 07:59 PM

Originally posted by nforcer:
You are correct. Alcohol is just responsible for drunk drivers killing people, people killing other people, people killing themselves, and loads of other stupid behavior.

And just having a good time.

willed · Feb 20, 2005, 08:04 PM

Originally posted by CD Hanks:
They weren't that precious if the majority of that time is spent here.

Speak for yourself.

CD Hanks · Feb 20, 2005, 08:08 PM

Originally posted by willed:
Speak for yourself.

Yeah, I know. I'm just as guilty as the other guy.

Superchicken · Feb 21, 2005, 12:29 PM

You know, I wouldn't be surprised if the eMac was faced out for an iMac mini, think 12 inch iBook, with either no keyboard or track pad. Very similar concept to the Mac mini but a bit pricier.