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Super Mario · Jun 19, 2005, 10:49 AM

There's a mystery here. Even if I don't dream of the opposite sex I still wake up with a XXX one. No, I don't dream of the same sex.

CreepingDeth · Jun 19, 2005, 10:51 AM

…

OwlBoy · Jun 19, 2005, 10:53 AM

heh

Having to urinate can causes that I think.

-Owl

Super Mario · Jun 19, 2005, 10:54 AM

Originally Posted by OwlBoy

heh

Having to urinate can causes that I think.

-Owl

Most women don't understand our dilema. Imagine ladies we have to wake up with this thing and when we go for a pee we have to bend forward 90 degrees to piss.

parallax · Jun 19, 2005, 10:56 AM

You know, if you just search Google for "morning erection" or "morning wood" you would be able to figure out why it happens.

Unless you think there's some real discussion to be had out of this? ;-)

historylme · Jun 19, 2005, 10:58 AM

enjoy it wile it last. And if somebody is sharing your bed, be a good neighbor and share you wood with them.

Busemann · Jun 19, 2005, 11:02 AM

This thread has potential

ReggieX · Jun 19, 2005, 11:03 AM

No election is scheduled for today, I think you have your calendar set wrong.

Super Mario · Jun 19, 2005, 11:33 AM

"Most guys have nocturnal erections throughout their lifetime, and their frequency, along with one's awareness of them, may vary. Nighttime/morning erections can be noticeably harder or stiffer than those had when awake. The penis can stay erect for up to two hours nightly, and not all men who have erections during the night wake up with one in the morning"

Don't you love being played with when asleep? Eynstyn don't answer.

ManOfSteal · Jun 19, 2005, 11:45 AM

Originally Posted by Super Mario

...I still wake up with a XXX one.

Now, that is hardcore right there.

Zimphire · Jun 19, 2005, 12:01 PM

Originally Posted by Super Mario

Most women don't understand our dilema. Imagine ladies we have to wake up with this thing and when we go for a pee we have to bend forward 90 degrees to piss.

Wow, I can't even pee when it's that way.

Too far to travel.

Millennium · Jun 19, 2005, 03:14 PM

Well, yes. It's actually fairly well-studied from a physiological perspective.

An erection is caused by an increased flow of blood to areas called erectile tissue (found not only in the genitals of both sexes, but also found elsewhere). Although this is commonly brought on by arousal, it can be triggered by other things as well. Even simple friction -such as against clothing- can be a trigger, but in the case of morning erections, it's triggered by the transition from sleep to a waking state. Blood flow increases throughout the body, including to all the erectile tissues, and we've all experienced the results of that at one time or another.

This has been another Useless Fact (tm).

Oisín · Jun 19, 2005, 03:24 PM

Originally Posted by Millennium

This has been another Useless Fact (tm).

Stuck on a Windows box?

Cody Dawg · Jun 19, 2005, 04:48 PM

What's with all of the erection threads around here?

Take some sex ed classes, will ya?

wdlove · Jun 19, 2005, 04:52 PM

It seems that around the MacNN lounge certain topics make there rounds. It just happens to be erections at the moment. Tomorrow it will be something else.

bubblewrap · Jun 19, 2005, 04:53 PM

Well one good thing about it is, I can roll over and pole vault out of bed...

JoshuaZ · Jun 19, 2005, 05:27 PM

Just don't poke out any eyes.

von Wrangell · Jun 19, 2005, 05:42 PM

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

Recreational Poster · Jun 19, 2005, 05:56 PM

Originally Posted by Busemann

This thread has potential

Just so long as no one posts any pictures.

The Windozer · Jun 19, 2005, 05:56 PM

Originally Posted by Super Mario

Most women don't understand our dilema. Imagine ladies we have to wake up with this thing and when we go for a pee we have to bend forward 90 degrees to piss.

There's no need to bend forward once you find your range. Just make sure to adjust your distance to the target as pressure drops.

Oisín · Jun 19, 2005, 06:08 PM

Originally Posted by The Windozer

There's no need to bend forward once you find your range. Just make sure to adjust your distance to the target as pressure drops.

That's way too complicated mathematics for me so soon after waking up. It's easier to just wait those fifteen minutes till it's gone.

Besides, I don't feel that comfortable waltzing around in the hallway with a flagpole on my front, to get to the bathroom that I share with 15 other people, so for me, it's kind of a given to stay horizontal until all of me is horizontal...

phantomdragonz · Jun 19, 2005, 06:12 PM

6th grade.... sex ed....

we were watching a movie about puberty, it shows this kid waking up every morning through out his life, apparently he sleeps on his back all the time.

anyways, to wake him up the mother would always come into his room and pull off all his sheets...

so we see like 4 clips of this, as his room changes colors and different posters and such change and then one clip, he is lying in bed and mother comes in and pulls of the sheets, and that kid flipped over so damn fast it was enough to make EVERY guy in the room start laughing... the girls had NO idea what was going on, but the movie explained it all after the clip.

I will never forget that, just because it was so damn true, and it was damn hilarious!

sex ed... what an easy class... my teacher told me and I quote "if you show up to class you will pass, even if you are asleep most of the time..." that teacher was awesome!

Zach

UNTeMac · Jun 19, 2005, 06:13 PM

Originally Posted by von Wrangell

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

Yeah but I bet your cat sure loves it.

amsalpemkcus · Jun 19, 2005, 06:55 PM

Put this on when you go to sleep tonite:

Kenneth · Jun 19, 2005, 07:04 PM

Originally Posted by amsalpemkcus

Put this on when you go to sleep tonite:

This is disturbing! What? SM?

Anyway.. I got that "morning wood" thing all the time..

Does this show that my thing is working or something?

kmkkid · Jun 19, 2005, 07:08 PM

Originally Posted by Super Mario

There's a mystery here. Even if I don't dream of the opposite sex I still wake up with a XXX one. No, I don't dream of the same sex.

Even if I don't dream of the same sex I still wake up with a XXX one. No, I don't dream of the opposite sex.

Chris

ghporter · Jun 19, 2005, 08:48 PM

Full bladder plus just the right position in sleep equals pressure on the prostate, which equals the mechanical signal for an erection. Usually by the time I wake up with one, I REALLY have to go. Standing up helps, but it still takes a while for it to subside...

By the way, prostate pressure can cause erotic ideas to emerge while you sleep. At least the whole system works consistently.

TheMosco · Jun 19, 2005, 09:01 PM

Anyone see the morning wood urinal on the man show? They took a urinal, and then flipped it upside down. I thought it was a great idea.

dlefebvre · Jun 19, 2005, 11:59 PM

And all these years, I tought I was just a dirty sinner.

phantomdragonz · Jun 20, 2005, 12:44 AM

Originally Posted by ghporter

Full bladder plus just the right position in sleep equals pressure on the prostate, which equals the mechanical signal for an erection. Usually by the time I wake up with one, I REALLY have to go.

yeah, and have too good a dream and i wake up hoping i did not pee the bed!

Zach

Ganesha · Jun 20, 2005, 12:55 AM

Originally Posted by Super Mario

... The penis can stay erect for up to two hours nightly...

Good thing it's not 4, or you may need to call a doctor.

d.fine · Jun 20, 2005, 04:48 AM

In the weekends it comes of good use, during the week it's just plain annoying sometimes

, what you gonna do...

buggsuperstar · Jun 20, 2005, 04:51 AM

Originally Posted by von Wrangell

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

wtf....

Athens · Jun 20, 2005, 05:13 AM

Originally Posted by Cody Dawg

What's with all of the erection threads around here?

Take some sex ed classes, will ya?

your just jealous you cant be apart of the erection craze going on. Could be worst we could have a orgasm craze going on too…

Athens · Jun 20, 2005, 05:13 AM

Originally Posted by von Wrangell

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

ouch!

as2 · Jun 20, 2005, 05:38 AM

To be honest, morning wood isn't so bad usually, it's just when it happens in in-appropriate situations...

For example, have a 'heavy' night on the booze, your friends are too drunk to drive home so crash at your place.

There's not enough beds, so you share your double with a female friend, in a completely non sexual way, only for her to wake up first and find you with a STONKING BONER causing a tent under the sheets!

I mean, how am I supposed to deal with that?!

vexborg · Jun 20, 2005, 05:39 AM

Originally Posted by von Wrangell

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

Yep, that fecking hurts!

Oisín · Jun 20, 2005, 05:45 AM

Originally Posted by as2

I mean, how am I supposed to deal with that?!

Learn to sleep foetus-style or on your stomach?

ShotgunEd · Jun 20, 2005, 06:41 AM

Originally Posted by as2

To be honest, morning wood isn't so bad usually, it's just when it happens in in-appropriate situations...

For example, have a 'heavy' night on the booze, your friends are too drunk to drive home so crash at your place.

There's not enough beds, so you share your double with a female friend, in a completely non sexual way, only for her to wake up first and find you with a STONKING BONER causing a tent under the sheets!

I mean, how am I supposed to deal with that?!

Wink and hope she takes the hint?

ManOfSteal · Jun 20, 2005, 06:42 AM

How was this morning Super Mario? You need to chop wood again?

buggsuperstar · 06:48 AM

Originally Posted by ManOfSteal

How was this morning Super Mario? You need to chop wood again?

This reminds me of the episode of Simpsons where they spoofed the legend of the Trojan Horse. And as the Trojans pour out of the horse and ravage the palace, Ned says:

"From this day forth, whenever people get a big piece of wood, they'll think of Trojans."

turtle777 · Jun 20, 2005, 09:58 AM

WTF, guys. It's monday morning. As if this wasn't bad enough...

-t

macaddict0001 · Jun 20, 2005, 04:03 PM

Originally Posted by von Wrangell

I hate it when the cat thinks it's a toy...

That happened to me but with my testicles.

Originally Posted by Oisín

Learn to sleep foetus-style or on your stomach?

When you are too drunk to drive?

Oisín · Jun 20, 2005, 04:08 PM

Originally Posted by macaddict0001

That happened to me but with my testicles.

When you are too drunk to drive?

Last time I checked, rolling on to your stomach takes less skill and technique than driving a car.

Otherwise, I should seriously consider getting that license; I've got the rolling-on-to-my-stomach thing down without a hitch, so if driving is even easier, I'll nail that sucker in a flash!

von Wrangell · Jun 20, 2005, 04:35 PM

Originally Posted by macaddict0001

That happened to me but with my testicles.

Ouch!

Cadaver · Jun 20, 2005, 07:16 PM

Originally Posted by macaddict0001

That happened to me but with my testicles.

Uh... I tend to keep all non-human companions away from mine...

d.fine · Jun 21, 2005, 01:59 AM

Originally Posted by Cadaver

Uh... I tend to keep all (non)human male companions away from mine...

Fixed

Cubeoid · Jun 21, 2005, 02:19 AM

No mysteries.. just matter

Sealobo · Jun 21, 2005, 11:37 AM

It's a daily reminder for men of what we're living for.

Keep going!

MacNStein · Jun 21, 2005, 11:52 AM

Yeah, when I'm asleep it's difficult to explain that it's just my desire to take a piss. On the other hand, having sex is absolutely the best way to wake up.