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Superchicken · Jul 7, 2005, 02:33 AM

OK I'm not one for gross topics and what not but. When you've got your iPod in and you're around a few people, and you accidentally let one go or something... don't you get that feeling like, "what if that one was really loud and I just couldn't hear it?" I get that at the gym sometimes. I'm pretty sure most of the time they're just the quiet lil bit of gas getting out whatever... but... it makes me paranoid...

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 02:39 AM

What?

Your iPod in where... Oh, you mean you have your iPod on and your earbuds in your ears... never mind.
Do you pass gas often? For a second I thought you were using the recording attachement and were recording your farts with you iPod.

Beano.

Warung · Jul 7, 2005, 02:43 AM

SBD

/obvious

ManOfSteal · Jul 7, 2005, 07:15 AM

Albert Pujols · Jul 7, 2005, 07:24 AM

d.fine · Jul 7, 2005, 07:41 AM

keep 'em in then

paul w · Jul 7, 2005, 07:50 AM

this is the first superchicken topic in a while that I actually really like. But if I got the headphones on, I hold it. That's that.

xi_hyperon · Jul 7, 2005, 07:55 AM

If something like that happens at the gym, I'm much more concerned about the resulting toxic cloud. The protein drink I take causes frequent and dangerous outgassing. I usually choose to go take a walk around the track rather than stick around the scene of the crime.

dlefebvre · Jul 7, 2005, 07:57 AM

Originally Posted by Superchicken

OK I'm not one for gross topics and what not but. When you've got your iPod in and you're around a few people, and you accidentally let one go or something... don't you get that feeling like, "what if that one was really loud and I just couldn't hear it?" I get that at the gym sometimes. I'm pretty sure most of the time they're just the quiet lil bit of gas getting out whatever... but... it makes me paranoid...

The trick is to be next with someone else with headphones. Then you can rip one out and just suspiciously look at your unaware neihbour.

d.fine · Jul 7, 2005, 10:19 AM

Originally Posted by xi_hyperon

I'm much more concerned about the resulting toxic cloud.

wouldn't want to work out next to you...

Originally Posted by dlefebvre

The trick is to be next with someone else with headphones. Then you can rip one out and just suspiciously look at your unaware neihbour.

Tataaaa! That should fix your problem!

xi_hyperon · 10:36 AM

Originally Posted by d.fine

wouldn't want to work out next to you...

Sometimes I don't like working out next to me either.

Luckily for others, I go when the place is virtually empty, so I'm usually the only casualty.

Eriamjh · Jul 7, 2005, 10:45 AM

A fart not heard is a fart wasted.

Let 'em rip!

Dr. Awesome · Jul 7, 2005, 11:13 AM

Originally Posted by Superchicken

OK I'm not one for gross topics and what not but. When you've got your iPod in and you're around a few people, and you accidentally let one go or something... don't you get that feeling like, "what if that one was really loud and I just couldn't hear it?" I get that at the gym sometimes. I'm pretty sure most of the time they're just the quiet lil bit of gas getting out whatever... but... it makes me paranoid...

Where's your pride? What kind of man are you?

Geez... Mac users these days.

Make 'em as loud as possible, then act like you don't realize you just did it. The hardest part about it is keeping a straight face.

ort888 · Jul 7, 2005, 11:47 AM

WWJD?

RAILhead · Jul 7, 2005, 12:17 PM

I always say "short speech" prior to a colon tap, followed-up by a curt "thanks for listening." My wife hates it when I do it, though I can't imagine why.

Maury

FulcrumPilot · Jul 7, 2005, 12:22 PM

why not immediately start singing out aloud?They'd think you made that noise with your mouth.

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 12:26 PM

Just proclaim: "What?!, did somebody sit on a duck?"... I tell you... <Rodney Dangerfield, grhs>

MindFad · Jul 7, 2005, 12:27 PM

I busted one off in front of my friend's mom yesterday by mistake. The room was dark, and I didn't realize she was sitting on the couch. I experienced brief embarrassment, but laughed it off.

[/blog]

E's Lil Theorem · Jul 7, 2005, 12:27 PM

I never feel gassy while working out, so this is a problem I don't have.

Next time you're in this situation and you feel it coming, take out one of the earbuds and listen for it. If you can hear it, other people can hear it. If it bothers you that other people can hear it, next time, excuse yourself and go wild.

Originally Posted by xi_hyperon

...I usually choose to go take a walk around the track rather than stick around the scene of the crime.

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 12:28 PM

You should have < upon discovering your company > said, nice couch, built in whoopy cushion...

d.fine · Jul 7, 2005, 12:50 PM

Originally Posted by Eriamjh

A fart not heard is a fart wasted.

Let 'em rip!

no thanks!

scaught · Jul 7, 2005, 01:45 PM

Originally Posted by MindFad

I busted one off in front of my friend's mom yesterday by mistake. The room was dark, and I didn't realize she was sitting on the couch. I experienced brief embarrassment, but laughed it off.

[/blog]

[/pbd]

besson3c · Jul 7, 2005, 01:54 PM

Originally Posted by Superchicken

OK I'm not one for gross topics and what not but. When you've got your iPod in and you're around a few people, and you accidentally let one go or something... don't you get that feeling like, "what if that one was really loud and I just couldn't hear it?" I get that at the gym sometimes. I'm pretty sure most of the time they're just the quiet lil bit of gas getting out whatever... but... it makes me paranoid...

A bit of gas serves you right for eating Jesus, the son of God... nice going Chicken.

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 02:09 PM

not again

Superchicken · Jul 7, 2005, 02:22 PM

I should note, most of the time it's involuntary, like when you're on the leg press, or uhh... shoot don't even know the name of the machine you put weights on the end... and you pull up (wow that's vague) but you're on an angle and junk and... yah... and occasionally on the elliptical... I dono... I've never been super proud of farting...

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 02:29 PM

"The name of the machine you put weights on the end... and you pull up but you're on an angle and junk and yeah.."

Like whoa. Lay off the holy wine ok?

You should not do free weights, without knowing the name of the machine you are using. It's a row machine, you lay face down and pull up right? To isolate your back muscles.

Like this?

Superchicken · Jul 7, 2005, 02:38 PM

Kinda only mine doesn't look that good.

besson3c · 03:22 PM

I'll stop with the Chicken eating Jesus thing, since it seems that I'm the only one that finds this amusing (I do have a twisted, although lighthearted sense of humor).

I almost always double-take Chicken's posts because I never know if he carefully sits down and reasons through a post about something like his farts, or whether this is just pure stream of consciousness...

Superchicken · Jul 7, 2005, 03:37 PM

We'll go for the second one thar. That said this is not indicative of my posts normally... normally I wouldn't go for this sort of humour... I was feeling weird last night.

RAILhead · Jul 7, 2005, 03:45 PM

Well, I think discussing farts is great -- I have no problem with bodily functions (though my wife has problems with mine, at times).

I'll tell you what I hate -- speaking of farts and all: When you are in a rush to take a grumpy and you fart as you raise the lid, then, when you finally get to assume the position, your face is sitting in the middle of your fart.

I remember one time we ate at an EXCELLENT Mexican food place called Abuelos, when we lived in Ft Worth. It gave me MAJOR, paint-peeling gas, and a let one rip while on the floor, restringing my guitar. Needless to say, it was potent enough that even I couldn't stay in the room, so I left. A couple minutes later I go back, and there's our cat (Uno), grubbing the floor right where I farted.

Now THAT'S a fart, my friends.

Maury

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 03:52 PM

Maury,

You are totally cracking me up man! You must be a damned hoot at parties and gatherings!

B

xi_hyperon · Jul 7, 2005, 03:57 PM

Heh, we have an Abuelo's here, and I ate there for lunch last week. Had similar results, to the detriment of the office building where I work.

In such situations, I leave my cube and take a long walk through the cube farm in customer service next door.

budster101 · Jul 7, 2005, 04:00 PM

Wife and I had food poisoning for two weeks not too long ago from a famous Mexican Restaraunt by us.
Apparently there was feces in the food. Human. The Health Department had to dop off some tests for us to take, and it turned out to be some sort of ecoli thing... That was a bad two weeks I'll tell you.

ort888 · Jul 7, 2005, 04:44 PM

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/M...ItemId=3986180

besson3c · Jul 7, 2005, 08:03 PM

Originally Posted by ort888

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/M...ItemId=3986180

I wonder how many people have paid $1 for a 6 second fart track?

SimpleLife · Jul 7, 2005, 08:20 PM

Originally Posted by Superchicken

OK I'm not one for gross topics and what not but. When you've got your iPod in and you're around a few people, and you accidentally let one go or something... don't you get that feeling like, "what if that one was really loud and I just couldn't hear it?" I get that at the gym sometimes. I'm pretty sure most of the time they're just the quiet lil bit of gas getting out whatever... but... it makes me paranoid...

I understand and I "kinda" feel for you.

Personally, I carry these, always.

SimpleLife · Jul 7, 2005, 08:21 PM

Originally Posted by MindFad

I busted one off in front of my friend's mom yesterday by mistake. The room was dark, and I didn't realize she was sitting on the couch. I experienced brief embarrassment, but laughed it off.

[/blog]

Well, there goes a fantasy...

dlefebvre · Jul 7, 2005, 08:50 PM

I remember when I was in college. I was studying in a common room while listning to my favorite tape on my loud walkman (in the days way before iPods). I felt one coming. Then I said to myself "Who's going to notice, since the music is so loud". As I was ripping a pretty loud one, I realised I was the only one who could hear the loud music... I never looked up from my books, as nothing had happened. I waited until almost everyone was gone before moving from my seat. I was young and naive, but mostly embarassed.

MacMan4000 · Jul 8, 2005, 12:16 AM

MacMan4000 · Jul 8, 2005, 12:25 AM

Originally Posted by RAILhead

I'll tell you what I hate -- speaking of farts and all: When you are in a rush to take a grumpy and you fart as you raise the lid, then, when you finally get to assume the position, your face is sitting in the middle of your fart.

What I hate is when you think you have to take a huge crap and you rush to the toilet and sit down then it turns out to just be a monster fart that echoes through the bathroom...

dlefebvre · Jul 8, 2005, 09:50 AM

And the walls shall tremble by the sheer force of my power ring!