Welcome to the MacNN Forums.

Cubeoid · Aug 9, 2005, 10:14 PM

I hold the main title, I don't much fancy the letter formation of CEO, so I Cubeoid, am the SM (Super Master) of my company, name witheld at this time for reasons which are witheld also.

I have some job openings which will follow, now:

1. The position of Super Master Junior is up for grabs: you need to have great talent, big eyes, be able to write and speak english or french and deal well with complex people, be able to be able on time and reply to email everyday (or every second day).

That is all for know.

Please email your letter of application to here: foymula@yahoo.com

Good Luck and may the most talented among you win. I will decide that. People who do not win, will still get an email back saying something like:

You did not win, but please do not hesitate to conact us again with further questions.

budster101 · Aug 9, 2005, 10:19 PM

How exciting...

dreilly1 · Aug 9, 2005, 10:19 PM

Based on my prior work experience, I can only qualify for the following positions:

- smartass
- dork

When one of these opens up, please let me know.

Cubeoid · Aug 9, 2005, 10:21 PM

This position will pay no money, I didn't mention that. You will work for nothing, but do not let that minor detail discourage any of you. I see many potential employees among you people. That is why I chose here to advertise the position.

budster101 · Aug 9, 2005, 10:23 PM

Oh, wait, can I be the smartass? Pick me. Pick me.

Meh.

Cubeoid · Aug 9, 2005, 10:23 PM

Originally Posted by dreilly1

Based on my prior work experience, I can only qualify for the following positions:

- smartass
- dork

When one of these opens up, please let me know.

Once I hire the JSM, the next position opening will be the "watchful advocate" position. Nothing like you're writing about here. But please do not hesitate to contact us with further questions to your question(s).

dreilly1 · Aug 9, 2005, 10:24 PM

Originally Posted by Cubeoid

This position will pay no money, I didn't mention that.

Sounds like what you're realy looking for then is an idiot.

Dork I can do. Idiot is beyond my capability. Sorry!

Cubeoid · Aug 9, 2005, 10:30 PM

Idiots are the way of the future. They will rule us all. I need a proud idiot/moron who will be loyal and cunning, a fast typer with a good understanding of other idiots is almost the perfect example, you do not nesecerily have to be stupid, I've met some very intelligiient idiots in my time. Somebody who does not mind sleeping at various times of the day or night would be suitable.
Even if you do not 'think' you qualify for the postion of SMJ, do not hesitate to attempt to apply. You might be the person I am looking for. Good luck.

rickey939 · Aug 9, 2005, 11:03 PM

I want stock options!

Cubeoid · Aug 9, 2005, 11:34 PM

Dear rickey939,

After reading your comment in post ID2646212 I decided that you are (or might be are/like) like somebody I could welcome into my corporation as my assistant (the aformentioned position of Super Master Junior. Please concider sending an email with your application letter. This could very well be an important email you send in your life.

Regards
Cubeoid

budster101 · Aug 10, 2005, 12:06 AM

I want the only key to the executive washroom, and it had better be stocked full of porno.

Cubeoid · Aug 10, 2005, 12:23 AM

If you're hired you'll be working from home.. I do not mind how many hours a week you masturbate, as long as the tasks are done in a timely fashion and/or manner and subited in/and/or on time.

Ok.

budster101 · Aug 10, 2005, 12:40 AM

Thinking about it. Agreed.

Cubeoid · Aug 10, 2005, 12:46 AM

You've shown good potential budster. Please send your application letter explaing in detail in 10-100 words or more, why I should hire you to work for my enterprise. Please also explain in detail how you heard about our (my) company and what gives you a sensation of ultra-powerful harmony and organisation/friendship while learning about my organisation which you have a good chance (if you pass selection criteria) to be a part of. All the best and don't screw up the email.

budster101 · Aug 10, 2005, 01:21 AM

x=0
If x<100 then
print "I'm something"
x=x+1
else
print "else"

Or something like that.

Chuckit · Aug 10, 2005, 02:29 AM

Originally Posted by Cubeoid

Dear rickey939,

After reading your comment in post ID2646212 I decided that you are (or might be are/like) like somebody I could welcome into my corporation as my assistant (the aformentioned position of Super Master Junior. Please concider sending an email with your application letter. This could very well be an important email you send in your life.

You don't want somebody with that many aliases. He's bound to be a double agent.

Cubeoid · Aug 10, 2005, 02:55 AM

Originally Posted by Chuckit

You don't want somebody with that many aliases. He's bound to be a double agent.

That fits in very well with our corporate strategy: "Double standards are like double agents, alieses, supporting diversity universe across world and we love chocolate, you can be champions in clouds!"

11011001 · Aug 10, 2005, 03:24 AM

Well, after considering the position, I have decided that you have choosen me as SMJ.

budster101 · Aug 10, 2005, 06:19 AM

Uhm, errr...

"Takes off shirt, drops pants" Oh yeah! Then I'm outta here. I quit. Here's your stupid uniform, it was two sizes too small anyway.

Cubeoid · Aug 10, 2005, 07:17 AM

Originally Posted by 11011001

Well, after considering the position, I have decided that you have choosen me as SMJ.

After reviewing hunderds of applications that I somehow did not recieve. I have decided that 11011001 has be chosen as the Super Master Junior.

Dear Sir/Madam,

Your charm, possibly good looks, carnage elements, and quick witted style (sassyness) thinking plus more elements have concluded and told me that you are the good (right) candidate for the position you have applied for.

Please try to "burn" these images into your mind/head, they will enable you to become a better (cool, agile and slick, with prospects of laughter, enjoyment and sweet tears of clerical ability) operator of your role, making you feel important and worthyful.

You are now elegible for these company benefits, that the other candidates will wish they now had (they don't, only you do as for now)

* coffe drinking uniform
* a ticket form to take a walk outside after completing tasks (with or with not pet [no dogs, they foster company disloyalty])
* motivational pamphlet (recievable upon emailing)

Now. memorize the company song.

Work Work Work without work we
are unable to keep working and making sure we do more work
work work work, for when we work we can keep working

chorus: louder and with dance routine (email)

Oooooohhhhhh yeeeaaaa.
oooooohhhh yeeaaaa.
Woooo wooo wooo yo yo.

Work work work, without work
we will die and not be able to keep working
.

Once more .. congratulations.