[Hash]

Please provide your feedback for this poster idea. This is for a parcel delivery service (real name is changed). Face image will be different on a final version.

here is the poster idea

Please, do not comment the text, i know, its not good, it will be changed too.

[air]

it looks like... a porno!? when is it coming out!?

[Hash]

really??

[greenamp]

Constructive criticism:

- The design has hierarchy problems ( no real focal point )
- Transparent overlay can be effective ( look at GQ's logo on their magazines ), but overuse makes a design look amateur.
- I would rethink the theme. If the poster is for a delivery service, it should be simple, bold, and easy to understand with a clear message ( which goes for any ad ).
- I would rethink my font choices. Display fonts have little to no place in an ad whose target audience is the business crowd.
- You should get out some paper and brainstorm about what message you're trying to get across in that poster, which is universally simple for a delivery type company, "fast, reliable, prompt, delivery, etc."

Honestly, I think you need to start over. Try not to let cool graphics take the place of effective design. Think of 1 idea and focus your design around that. Think of your target audience. Avoid display fonts. If nothing else, use the rule of 3rds to establish a focal point.

[Hash]

Thanks! All you said makes perfect sense. About the poster: actually, they wanted something unusual, for a young target group (colleges, high school), something cool and un-business, something looking like a pop star poster and so on.

[Artful Dodger]

I agree with greenamp. However, If you choose not to start over:

1) I'd get rid rid of the girl. IMO, it throws off the message of the poster.
2) Try to avoid the washed-out pastel colors. Rethink the color scheme.
3) Get rid of the large pink rectangle on the left side and the blue box on the bottom. These right angled geometric shapes don't fit within the overall environment.
4) I do like the ocean and sky background, but the icons need to stand out more. Create one more: I like odd numbers for ad icons. I'd experiment with some bright/bold color and rounded shapes and edges.

Of course. this is subjective. So, do what you want, as these are merely suggestions. Good luck!

[meelk]

Mine Eyes!

[JoshuaZ]

hmm... its way too bright. I mean, my eyes burn.

[RAILhead]

holy crapola

[Randman]

The fonts clash.

The girl's image makes no sense.

It took me a couple of seconds to get the email and stamp images.

The colors are very ... interesting.

It looks like an album cover for Olivia Newton-John.

[sek929]

You need to make something stand out, you've played it to safe.
Its also a little to busy for a delivery service ad, which, I'd think would have a quick and concise image heirarchy.

Focus on less colors (but make the ones you want stand out more) and a more defined visual space.

[Hash]

Thanks all, great suggestions!

[Hash]

This is
another version

I hope you like it

[RAILhead]

holy crapola

[andi*pandi]

um... ?

if you insist on using a girl, find some stock art of a girl with mail, or something relevant to the topic... This looks like a very *specialized* delivery service.

[davesimondotcom]

I think you'd be better off doing something much more iconic. There is too much going on in there.

The message is that "Greystone" makes the world smaller, somehow, right? Think along those lines. You want a shipping company to have a very well organized ad. People like to think of shipping companies as almost militarily precise. Hence, they have uniforms and time schedules, etc.

For a poster like that, I'd suggest using a lot of white space. Creating a gap between the world around the poster and the message will enhance the message.

Keep at it...

[The iMac Man]

To me, a parcel delivery company should be giving off a manly vibe.

From your images, I'd expect some sort of fairy in a pink tutu to show up at my door with a package wrapped in tissues.

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

It is missing a Unicorn and a rainbow.

[KeriVit]

It looks like you're using effects and filters just because you can. The color scheme is doing nothing for me use different fonts, and please lose the girl.

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

Honestly it is encompassing just about every design cliché imaginable.

Cheesy Bryce Water
bevel effects
Outer Glows/drop shadows
Motion blurs
Some woman for no reason.
Ugly 80's colours

Try making a poster in Quark or illustrator so you don't use these horrible effects/filters.

Is this for a client or a school project?

[sek929]

Though Star Wars is a little harsh I think you should do more hand sketches before getting sidetracked by Photoshop.

[meelk]

tara reid might take exception to her image being used in your picture as well.

[MacNStein]

that's what I was thinking... "wow, a ho house that delivers!"

How bout this angle? It's crude, but what do you expect from a 3 min hack job (and stealing a stock image)?

[meelk]

How many people are "light years apart" anyway? Oh wait, none

[andi*pandi]

that's more what I was thinking macnstein... but let's see if this is a homework exercise before we do any more mockups for him to embellish.

[Hash]

Thanks a lot! I bet Tara Reid will not approve it.. MacNStein, thats lovely! Cannon, yea, I grew in 80s, can't help.

Daves, I really liked your notion.. white space. Yep. Light years of white space.
meelk, there are damn too many people light years apart, even being close

[turtle777]

Seriously, is that business trying to attract real customers ?

Then you'd better change the poster. The stuff you've done so far looks cheapish and very unprofessional. My advice: get a professional designer involved. It will pay off.

-t

[meelk]

Originally Posted by Hash

Thanks a lot! I bet Tara Reid will not approve it.. MacNStein, thats lovely! Cannon, yea, I grew in 80s, can't help.

Daves, I really liked your notion.. white space. Yep. Light years of white space.
meelk, there are damn too many people light years apart, even being close

So these emotionally challenged people are going to be sending each other packages? I think you are lost in wanting some kind of emotional attachment to sending parcels.

[The iMac Man]

Originally Posted by turtle777

Seriously, is that business trying to attract real customers ?

Then you'd better change the poster. The stuff you've done so far looks cheapish and very unprofessional. My advice: get a professional designer involved. It will pay off.

-t

Okay, so constructive criticism obviously wasn't one of your specialties in school.


I would assume Hash either IS a professional designer, or is trying to become one, so your "advice" is not only not helpful, it's actually quite stupid.

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by The iMac Man

I would assume Hash either IS a professional designer, or is trying to become one

-t

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

Originally Posted by The iMac Man

I would assume Hash either IS a professional designer

You honestly call that work above "Professional"?

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by Scandalous Ion Cannon

You honestly call that work above "Professional"?

Yeah, The iMac Man's comment was one of the dumbest so far. He obviously must be blind, or severaly handicapped in matters of taste...

-t

[meelk]

Not to harp on him, but honestly, if this is the kind of thing hes going to show as professional work, he has a very short career path ahead of him.
If its a school project, all is well and good, he is learning as he goes.

[The iMac Man]

"Professional" doesn't necessarily mean it's good.

[The iMac Man]

Originally Posted by turtle777

Yeah, The iMac Man's comment was one of the dumbest so far. He obviously must be blind, or severaly handicapped in matters of taste...

-t

You sir are an idiot.

Do you even know what the word "Professional" means? It has nothing to do with quality...

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by The iMac Man

You sir are an idiot.
Do you even know what the word "Professional" means? It has nothing to do with quality...

Ok, so if his work looks to you like the work of a pro, I do understand why you would label ME an idiot !



-t

[KeyLimePi]

Um...I was sort of hoping this thread was a joke.

[turtle777]

Nah, out thread here is much better

-t

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

Originally Posted by The iMac Man

"Professional" doesn't necessarily mean it's good.

"Having or showing great skill; expert: a professional repair job.
A skilled practitioner; an expert."

I am also a "Professional" designer and came up with something for the client:

[turtle777]

^^^

-t

[Hash]

Come on people, calm down, its just an idea for a poster..
ok, here here more informative version

hope it will clarify some questions.. I think Tara Reid image was really confusing..

[Hash]

Cannon - i had good laugh, really

[The iMac Man]

Professional means you do something for hire.

Someone could have hired him to make this design...


Being "professional" does not mean that you are any good. For example, the Cubs are a "professional" baseball team.

[Hash]

I do not pretend its was a good design, of course. Maybe I really should stick to Illustrator and white/black

[RAILhead]

holy crapola


LOSE THE GIRL, MAN!
What are all those freaking lines?
What's wrong with the color?
Why are the images (envelopes?) all crapped-out and jaggy?
Why are htings all blurry?
Why are there so many freaking glowies?
WHy is that stupid sentence being printed -- it that *their* tag?
WHAT DOES LIGHTYEARS MEAN?!?!?

Ugh.

[Hash]

Originally Posted by meelk

Not to harp on him, but honestly, if this is the kind of thing hes going to show as professional work, he has a very short career path ahead of him.
If its a school project, all is well and good, he is learning as he goes.

no, its not for money or even a part of a job.. just some sketch of idea for someone i know. They sort of liked it though dunno why, maybe cause it had everything they wanted - a beautiful girl, a sea, a lot of colors and parcels

[Hash]

Originally Posted by RAILhead

holy crapola


LOSE THE GIRL, MAN!
What are all those freaking lines?
What's wrong with the color?
Why are the images (envelopes?) all crapped-out and jaggy?
Why are htings all blurry?
Why are there so many freaking glowies?
WHy is that stupid sentence being printed -- it that *their* tag?
WHAT DOES LIGHTYEARS MEAN?!?!?

Ugh.

Yep, their tag. Girl is a must. Colors must be vivid. Things are blurry, cause they are flying (with speed of light, haha). Light years, well mean, light years.

[sek929]

The last one you posted is much better, the text is off a bit though. The white letter of the second line should be on the same vert space as the above line (the black letter is in between the color changes)

I agree to take the lburry edges back a bit, you need to differentiate the forwground from the background more.

[sek929]

Also might want to make the first text bigger or the second text smaller, the font size is to similiar between them.

[Hash]

Originally Posted by turtle777

Seriously, is that business trying to attract real customers ?

Then you'd better change the poster. The stuff you've done so far looks cheapish and very unprofessional. My advice: get a professional designer involved. It will pay off.

-t

Well, its a digital color copy/print express delivery. I know these are very rough, they are just sketches.. no doubt final versions will be done by pros..They wanted it to be emotional. Some feelings. Very vivid, glossy. Hence, Tara or anyone nice.