[Koda]

A friend of mine was to be married in December and his fiancée just cut off the relationship. So far I don't know why but I need advice on how to help my friend get through this. I've never had to deal with this before....

[Captain Obvious]

Don't bad mouth her as there is a chance they will get back together in this instance. Tell him you are sorry and that it sucks but life will go on. Getting him drunk, picking up new women, and going on weekend trips that involve this type of debauchery are a good remedy for the short run. Until you know its over for good just take his mind off it.


It's his parents who paid for the deposits on the wedding you should feel sorry for.
No matter what WD and chicken say, don't tell him you love him or hold him til he cries.

[budster101]

Good riddance. He's better off.

Hookers
Booze
Good times

He'll forget the bitch's name after a month... ok give it 3.

She did him a favor.

[Randman]

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

[budster101]

Yeah, if they get back together there will be weirdness between you two.

- The Wedding Singer.

[iLikebeer]

Get him out of the house doin sh:t, but don't be patronizing about it.
Don't mention her or ask about her...nothing more annoying than everyone in the world asking about an ex.
Time heals all wounds, just act like nothing has changed.

[budster101]

When I said, she did him a favor, etc. I didn't mean to tell him that. (Just so you know)
I'm just sayin.

---

Otherwise just stay away from that. It's a hot topic and could ruin your friendship... believe me.

Just be his friend, and don't open your mouth no matter how tempting. Get him laid...

[iDriveX]

Originally Posted by Randman

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

Seconded. Just be a friend. nothing more, nothing less.

[alphasubzero949]

Originally Posted by Randman

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

...

[badidea]

What? You joined 2003, posted only 7 times and one of it is this thread!?!

Who are you?

[JoshuaZ]

You're posting in the wrong forum for girl advice.

Tell him to either make a very big and probably futile attempt to win her back, or move on.

[Millennium]

Be supportive. Don't let him do anything rash. If you don't mind my asking, why did his fiancee call things off?

[Sealobo]

i always think that the entire "fiancée" thing is stupid.

just let it be, life goes on. there are so many b!tches out there.

[Artful Dodger]

Make sure you are a great wing man and always take one for the team.

-Dr. Neil Clark Warren

[Randman]

Originally Posted by JoshuaZ

Tell him to either make a very big and probably futile attempt to win her back, or move on.

WRONG, WRONG, WRONG.

If you are going to give advice (and you shouldn't), tell him not to put pressure on her. She may just be overwhelmed by matters and it's her way of regaining control (flight or flight instinct).

Tell him to give her time and let her know that he understands and will be there for her if she wants. But if she is sure, he'll accept that and sadly move on in time.

Away from her, tell him not to sweat it out. If she changes her mind, he's in. If not, he's better off in the long run.

[Eriamjh]

He should run away. There is no going back.

If she does this now, what's to stop her from divorcing him after the wedding? Some commitment.

Console him and help him move on. He shouldn't try to get her back.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by JoshuaZ

You're posting in the wrong forum for girl advice.

Dude, stop projecting.

[Doofy]

Make sure he's aware of the possible reasons or her actions (normal cold feet, she's met someone else, she's mental) and then don't go near it again. Be a friend and hang with him, but don't discuss the subject and don't take him out specifically to get new honey.

[OreoCookie]

Two basic advices: Listen. Listen to what he's got to say about it. Ask questions, but never push him to do anything like going out and trying to hit on other girls. It might not be what he feels like, which would make the situation very awkward for him. The second thing is: support his decisions as a friend and try to stop him from doing anything rash.

I've no idea what happened between the two, but maybe she just got scared, so there is a chance, they might reconcile. And if that happens, he'll be thankful for your support as well.

[RAILhead]

Originally Posted by Randman

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

Thirded, fourthded, and fifthded.

(Or, you go hook up with her if she's hawt.)

That is all.

Maury

[Millennium]

Originally Posted by Randman

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

If you can do this, that's the best option, so I'll amend my previous advice: be supportive, don't let him do anything rash, and stay out of it if you can.

This said, situations like this have a nasty habit of sucking in bystanders. I've had it happen enough times that if only I could draw I might quit my job and take up a new career writing shoujo manga about my life. You really want to avoid this if you can. It's good to want to help your friends -that's why I keep getting sucked in- but situations like this will make your life very complicated very quickly, and in ways you may not be comfortable with.

So show a little more sense than I do, and don't get involved if you can avoid it. I'm trying to get better about this, and I know how difficult it is. Your instincts are telling you to help in any way you can, and that isn't even a Bad Thing to want, so ignoring the instinct is even harder than it might otherwise be. But it's best to stay out. Just by getting involved you stand to do more harm than good without even realizing it, because it will complicate their lives as much as it complicates yours, and they don't need to deal with that right now.

[Hawkeye_a]

Originally Posted by Randman

Stay the hell out of it. It's not your business.

I agree

[Hash]

Better sooner than later. So yeah, he's better off.