[l008com]

I want to put recycling slogans at the bottom of printable pages on my web site. But everyone should be recycling by now, if your not, then the time is over for asking nicely. So I need help thinking of some really funny offensive recycling slogans. Heres the 4 I came up with so far (4th isn't really offensive but still kinda funny):

> Don't Be A Dick, Recycle
> Recycle, Bitch!
> Only Assholes Waste Trees
> Computer Viruses Target People Who Don't Recycle

Let me know if you have any more...

[Salty]

Apparently recently an old lady walked into our church building and started talking to our secretary "Why don't you recycle more! We have to think of our grandchildren you know! I walk by here all the time and see card board boxes, or paper in garbage bags!"
Our secretary politely responded, "Most of the people who are throwing out anything here are volunteers, I am not their boss and I can't force them to do anything I say. I can ask them to recycle, but we already do recycle many things. I'm sorry."
After she left our Senior Pastor rounded the corner, "You know, I woulda just offered to let her sort through our garbage and find anything she wanted to recycle."

[the_glassman]

It pisses me off the number of people and places that don't recycle. I'd like to take a couple years of their garbage and lock them in their bedroom and fill it up to the ceiling so they could live with it for a few months.

[MaxPower2k3]

When I was in middle school, this cafeteria worker was always incredibly anal about everyone recycling. If you threw a can in the trash, he'd yell at you and make you dig it out and put it in the recycle bin. Then he was devastated at the end of the year when he found out that the janitors had just been dumping the recycle bins into the garbage dumpster at the end of the day.

[Salty]

I just get frustrated when people complain about things like cardboard boxes or something like that. It's freaking biodegradable. Yes, some forest out in BC is going to have to have more trees planted this year because I threw out a bunch of boxes.

[SSharon]

I have seen the people at my school empty recycling into trash dumpsters many times and once when confronted they told me they were following directions. Oh and did I mention they were dumping the stuff into a private off campus dumpsters instead of their own across the street?

[Apple Pro Underwear]

• Your Mom is not the only thing that can be used more than once
• Make the world better in 2 ways: Recycle and shave your back.
• Make up for child abuse by recycling.

[itistoday]

Originally Posted by Salty

I just get frustrated when people complain about things like cardboard boxes or something like that. It's freaking biodegradable. Yes, some forest out in BC is going to have to have more trees planted this year because I threw out a bunch of boxes.

I don't understand what you're saying. Are you not supportive of recycling?

[itistoday]

Originally Posted by Apple Pro Underwear

• Your Mom is not the only thing that can be used more than once
• Make the world better in 2 ways: Recycle and shave your back.
• Make up for child abuse by recycling.

Nice!

[Salty]

Originally Posted by itistoday

I don't understand what you're saying. Are you not supportive of recycling?

I like the idea of recycling. I don't like the idea of wasting. But I also don't like the idea of nagging the world into good behaviour which is how most insanely pro recycling people do it.

[itistoday]

Originally Posted by Salty

I like the idea of recycling. I don't like the idea of wasting. But I also don't like the idea of nagging the world into good behaviour which is how most insanely pro recycling people do it.

Yeah, I agree, nagging's no good. I usually prefer looking the person dead in the eye and saying in a calm yet steely voice, "Recycle." I continue staring at them until they get unnerved, shake their heads, and throw the bottle into the blue bin.

[Salty]

Yah that's fine, I do the same sort of thing with my youth group kids to encourage them to behave. Or I'll make funny comments. That's one thing it clearly states that you don't approve but they're not directly confronted with it and can choose to do what's right of their own free will. As opposed to trying to force it down their throats by sheer annoyance.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by itistoday

Yeah, I agree, nagging's no good. I usually prefer looking the person dead in the eye and saying in a calm yet steely voice, "Recycle." I continue staring at them until they get unnerved, shake their heads, and throw the bottle into the blue bin.

Trying to stare down people with a bottle in their hand? Not the most sensible thing ever.

[itistoday]

Ok people, if you don't get it, I was joking
Maybe I should've put a smiley in that post to make that more obvious...

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by itistoday

Maybe I should've put a smiley in that post to make that more obvious...

Well, yeah. Because there are people around who do exactly as you described.

[JoshuaZ]

I once got a lot of flack at college for throwing my sprite bottles in the trash and not in the recycling box. I got it from a lot of people, for a long time. See they didn`t seem to care that all the cans and bottles were emptied into the back of the same truck and got resorted later. Or even better, that the place they went to burned most fo it anyways, only recycling when they could make money off of it.

[l008com]

ok this was supposed to be a "share your offensive recycling slogan" thread, not a "share your boring stories and opinions about recycling" thread.

[MaxPower2k3]

"Recycling: More effective than Viagra at curing impotence"

[Eriamjh]

"If you don't recycle, we'll kill this kitten."

Or for those who would prefer...


"If you don't recycle, this kitten will kill you."

[l008com]

I like that but Im goona modify it to "Recycle, or the Kittens Die"

[l008com]

How about this?

> Your Mom Told Me To Recycle, Last Night

[l008com]

> Kanye West: President Bush Doesn't Care About Recycling

Ha ha ha

[deomacius]

Here are some...

• Join the tree huggers. Recycle today!
• Do your part or we'll sic the Anarchists on you!
• Free pair of Burkenstocks with every 100 lbs. of trash you recycle.

Seriously. Recycling is a good idea, but don't shove it down people's throats. I think you're gonna find that your quotes have just the opposite effect. People that do recycle are gonna laugh. People that don't recycle are gonna roll their eyes and lump you in with the rest of the hippies.

[sek929]

Originally Posted by Eriamjh

"If you don't recycle, this kitten will kill you."

Pure Genius™

[residentEvil]

"Have you tried wiping your ass with a spotted owl?"

Oh way, nevermind

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by ort888

*snip*

Uhm, wtf ?

-t

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by ort888

*snip*

Dude, seriously, WTF ?
Take it to the PWL, if you have to post sh!t like that !

-t

[Artful Dodger]

I pity the fool who don't recycle. -mr. t

Recycle...or get gonorrhea.

Recycle.... or Turtle will resurrect his ugly sig

[MaxPower2k3]

I think ort took the thread title a bit more literally than l008 intended.

[deomacius]

Originally Posted by ort888

*snip*

Yeah... ha, ha... chump.

[ort888]

Yeah, sorry guys. The only way to make those funny was to go all out. If it makes anyone feel better, most of those deeply offend me as well.

[ThinkInsane]

Originally Posted by ort888

Yeah, sorry guys. The only way to make those funny was to go all out. If it makes anyone feel better, most of those deeply offend me as well.

Seriously, wtf? Oh, I see, that was 'comedy'. Here's a hint: If you yourself find it deeply offensive, chances are, it ain't funny. You've been around long enough to know that we don't condone that kind of garbage on this site.

[ort888]

The term off-color humor (also known as dirty jokes or blue humor) is used to describe various "dirty" jokes, prose, poems, and skits that deal with topics that are considered to be in poor taste or overly vulgar by the prevailing morals in a culture. Most commonly labelled as "off-color" are acts concerned with sex, a particular racial group, or gender. Other off-color topics include: violence, particularly domestic abuse; excessive swearing; national superiority or inferiority, dead baby jokes, pedophilic content, and any other topics generally considered impolite or indecent. Generally, the point of off-colour humour is to induce laughter by evoking a feeling of shock and surprise in the comedian's audience. In this way, "blue" humor is related to other forms of postmodern humor, such as the anti-joke.

Dirty jokes were once considered subversive and underground, and rarely heard in public. Comedian Lenny Bruce was once tried, convicted, and actually jailed for obscenity after a stand up performance that included off-color humor in New York City in 1964. Comedian and actor Redd Foxx was well-known in nightclubs in the 1960s and '70s for his raunchy stand-up act, but toned it down for Sanford and Son and The Redd Foxx Comedy Hour, stating in the first monologue of the latter show that the only similarity between the show and his nightclub act was that "I'm smoking" [1]. American society has become increasingly tolerant of off-color humor since that time. Due in part to the mainstream success of comedians such as Dolemite, Andrew Dice Clay's "The Dice Man", and Richard Pryor in the 1970s and 1980s, such forms of humour came to be distributed widely, and grew socially acceptable.

In the 1990s and modern era, such comedians as George Carlin (and, in a more moderate form, David Chappelle) use "dirty" or otherwise shocking content to draw attention to their criticism of social issues - especially censorship and the socioeconomic divide.

The aristocrats is perhaps the most famous dirty joke; certainly, it is one of the best-known and most oft-repeated among comedians themselves.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Off-color_humor

[The Windozer]

In communist Russia, trash recycle you!

[turtle777]

Thread cleaninated.

-t

[l008com]

I thought it was tastefully off color. It does cross a line I really won't wanna cross on a recycling notice, but:
I like HOW offensive it was. If I can get some more that are equally AS offensive, just not racially offensive (you know, choose something else, like being sexually offensive) that would be great.

[ort888]

So you want it to be offensive but not really offensive?

You can't genuinely offend people without going for the jugular. As soon as you pull your punches you've lost.

[l008com]

I want as offensive as possible, without pulling the "race card"

[ort888]

Only one was racially insensitive.

[l008com]

i know, all the other i didn't like simply weren't funny/offensive enough :-)

[teknopimp]

Got mulch?

[m a d r a]

**** recycling! - the universe is infinite. we can always find another planet when this one's used up

[sminch]

don't bother recycling - nasa's taking us to the moon!

sminch

[rozwado1]

I missed ort's post before it got ThinkInsane'd.

How bout something slightly bizarre and off-kilter:
Recycle, or I'll track your IP, find out where you live and cut your eyes out when you're sleeping at night. Then I'll **** the sockets because you like it like that.

[sminch]

[itistoday]

Originally Posted by rozwado1

I missed ort's post before it got ThinkInsane'd.

How bout something slightly bizarre and off-kilter:
Recycle, or I'll track your IP, find out where you live and cut your eyes out when you're sleeping at night. Then I'll **** the sockets because you like it like that.

How trite.

[brokenjago]

nice one rozwado

[macaddict0001]

Originally Posted by m a d r a

**** recycling! - the universe is infinite. we can always find another planet when this one's used up

the universe is finite.

[11011001]

What's the point of recycling if global warming is going to destroy all the forests anyways? o.O

edit: I realized some da might take me seriously.