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marden · Oct 27, 2005, 09:26 PM

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW, BUT BLACK PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. O. J. did it.

2. Tupac is dead.

3. Teeth should not be decorated.

4. Weddings should start on time.

5. Your pastor doesn't know everything.

6. Jesse Jackson will never be President.

7. RED is not a kool-aid flavor, it's a color.

8. Church does not require expensive clothes.

9. Crown Royal bags are meant to be thrown away.

10.Your rims and sound system should not be worth more than your car !

10 TRUTHS BLACK AND HISPANIC PEOPLE KNOW, BUT WHITE PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. Elvis is dead.

2. Jesus was not White.

3. Rap music is here to stay

4. Kissing your pet is not cute or clean.

5. Skinny does not equal sexy.

6. Thomas Jefferson had black children.

7. A 5 year child is too big for a stroller.

8. N' SYNC will never hold a candle to the Jackson 5

9. An occasional BUTT whooping helps a child stay in line.

10. Having your children curse you out in public is not normal.

10 TRUTHS WHITE AND BLACK PEOPLE KNOW, BUT HISPANIC PEOPLE WON'T ADMIT:

1. Hickey's are not attractive.

2. Chicken is food, not a roommate.

3. Jesus is not a name for your son.

4. Your country's flag is not a car decoration.

5. Maria is a name but not for every other daughter.

6. "Jump out and run" is not in any insurance policies.

7. 10 people to a car is considered too many.

8. Buttoning just the top button of your shirt is a bad fashion statement.

9. Mami and Papi can't possibly be the nickname of every person in your family

10.Letting your children run wildly through the store is not normal.

cjrivera · Oct 27, 2005, 09:30 PM

THIS THREAD IS RACIALLY DISCRIMINATORY!!!

(because it doesn't mention Asians!

)

effgee · Oct 27, 2005, 09:32 PM

Originally Posted by marden

...10. Having your children curse you out in public is not normal. ...

I LOL'ed

Kevin · Oct 27, 2005, 09:37 PM

JoshuaZ · Oct 27, 2005, 09:40 PM

Someone list a top ten Asian people thingy. Because we really do need it.

effgee · Oct 27, 2005, 09:47 PM

1. Buddha was skinny.
2. Dogs are not food.
3. There is no man-made structure that can be seen from the moon.

someone continue with #4-10 ...

JoshuaZ · Oct 27, 2005, 09:49 PM

4) You are not good at math.
5) Rice tastes bland.
6) Giant Robots are not real.

(Though really, I do like rice, and it does taste good here)

cjrivera · Oct 27, 2005, 09:49 PM

7. The pedal to the right of the brake... that's the accelerator. (For the older Asian drivers)

marden · Oct 27, 2005, 10:06 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin

*snip*

I know you are kidding

and so in the same spirit allow me to wish you a
Happy Halloween!

Ratm · Oct 27, 2005, 10:13 PM

That's so wrong! ^^^

And the hispanic list mainly describes Mexicans. I'm not Mexican....so you get a big fat BOOO000oooo....

(I have to admit, he does have a nice *****COUGH****COUGH******

and

THAT'S NOT REAL. THAT'S PHOTOSHOPED. FAKE!

dcmacdaddy · Oct 27, 2005, 10:25 PM

Originally Posted by marden

I know you are kidding

and so in the same spirit allow me to wish you a
Happy Halloween!

That is SOME ass he's got there. Looks really muscular.

It reminds me of the old Eddiy Murphy routine from Raw where he's dissing Mr. T for "taking it up the ass".
I forgot the set-up but the punchline is <in a gruff, Mr. T voice>, "Hurry up Fool, or I'll clench my butt-cheeks and rip your d*ck off".

^^^That guy looks like he could do some d*ck-ripping-off with that ass.

<reminiscing mode>
Ahh, back when Eddie Murphy was viciously funny and didn't go around as the touchy-feely family-man actor.
</reminiscing mode>

marden · Oct 27, 2005, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by Ratm

That's so wrong! ^^^

And the hispanic list mainly describes Mexicans. I'm not Mexican....so you get a big fat BOOO000oooo....

(I have to admit, he does have a nice *****COUGH****COUGH******

and

THAT'S NOT REAL. THAT'S PHOTOSHOPED. FAKE!

All of your points are so noted! But are your notes... oh, nevermind.

Artful Dodger · Oct 27, 2005, 10:31 PM

halloween is forever tainted.

Ratm · Oct 28, 2005, 12:06 AM

Is that the Great Pumpkin that Linus was always talking about?

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 12:44 AM

Originally Posted by Artful Dodger

halloween is forever tainted.

To say NOTHING of Punkin Pie filling. Ewwwww!

loki74 · Oct 28, 2005, 01:36 AM

Originally Posted by JoshuaZ

6) Giant Robots are not real.

Indeed!

Its funny. In my Faith class theres this kid who sits next to me. I'm Asain, he's white. He is very much a nerd. Anyhoo... he's always talking to this other guy (who sits behind him) about anime and that stuff. One of his favorites is the Gundam series. So whenever he says the word "Gundam" I ask, "what the hell is a Gundam?" For whatever reason, he totally freaks out at this. Its pretty funny--I mean, heres an asain guy making fun of a white guy for being obsessed with an anime about giant robots...

el chupacabra · Oct 28, 2005, 01:44 AM

8. Snake venom, bear claws and gall bladders don't have magic healing powers.
9. Ninjas can't fly.
10. Raw fish is a great source of parasites.

Artful Dodger · 03:56 AM

11. Dried seafood tastes and smells like sh!t.
12. It's ok if you haven't mastered the violin by age 3.
13. Sumo wrestlers are just fat lazy slobs.

JoshuaZ · Oct 28, 2005, 04:26 AM

Seaweed tastes ok. Sumos are quite strong and have a tough job. Raw fish in Japan is quite safe to eat (even raw horse is... but it tastes like... well.. bad.)

Dude, ninjas can totally fly.

Ratm · Oct 28, 2005, 04:54 AM

fark.com

Kevin · Oct 28, 2005, 04:54 AM

Originally Posted by JoshuaZ

Seaweed tastes ok.

I actually like it.. esp the stuff they use in Sushi

Raw fish in Japan is quite safe to eat

How do they do that there? Do they freeze it to a certain temp? Or is it just REALLY REALLY fresh?

I've eaten tons of sushi in my time, never gotten sick from it.

ReggieX · Oct 28, 2005, 06:33 AM

Originally Posted by marden

9. Crown Royal bags are meant to be thrown away.

Crown Royal bags are for holding your Scrabble letters, everyone knows that!

ShotgunEd · Oct 28, 2005, 06:42 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

I actually like it.. esp the stuff they use in Sushi

I think its called Nori.

Sushi is great.

Wasabi is my favourite condiment.

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 09:02 AM

Originally Posted by dcmacdaddy

That is SOME ass he's got there. Looks really muscular.

It reminds me of the old Eddiy Murphy routine from Raw where he's dissing Mr. T for "taking it up the ass".
I forgot the set-up but the punchline is <in a gruff, Mr. T voice>, "Hurry up Fool, or I'll clench my butt-cheeks and rip your d*ck off".

^^^That guy looks like he could do some d*ck-ripping-off with that ass.

<reminiscing mode>
Ahh, back when Eddie Murphy was viciously funny and didn't go around as the touchy-feely family-man actor.
</reminiscing mode>

Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Roseanne Barr, Andrew Dice Clay...all succumbed to society's need to politically correct everybody. Well, we've got 4 better PEOPLE and less humor.

And I wonder what they would say about the changes. Happier WITH a comedy career or WITHOUT a comedy career?

And MR. T IS GAY??? When was THAT announced? In the RAW album??? Wow. Didn't know.

Kevin · Oct 28, 2005, 09:40 AM

No, he was doing impersonations of people as if THEY WERE gay.

Mr-T, The Honeymooners.. etc.

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 12:57 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin

No, he was doing impersonations of people as if THEY WERE gay.

Mr-T, The Honeymooners.. etc.

THANK YOU!

Now I know who to turn to when I want the 'straight' news! jk

Seriously, I wish the guy who posted that had just said so. You're a helpful guy, Kevin!

dcmacdaddy · Oct 28, 2005, 02:48 PM

Originally Posted by marden

THANK YOU!

Now I know who to turn to when I want the 'straight' news! jk

Seriously, I wish the guy who posted that had just said so. You're a helpful guy, Kevin!

"the old Eddie Murphy route from Raw"

Let's see, now. I am referencing a stand-up comedian and a specific instance where he is doing a stand-up routine and somehow you get out of that reference that I said that Eddie Murphy said that Mr. T was gay?!?

Dude, if you didn't know Mr. T was gay then why would you assume he was gay because a stand-up comedian was making gay jokes about him. You know they can make gay jokes about straight people, right?

I just don't understand your logical process that takes you from my reference to Eddie Murphy's stand-up routine to a declarative statement about Mr. T?!?

ironknee · Oct 28, 2005, 03:00 PM

Originally Posted by marden

if some guy came up and had sex with that

would it be bestiality?

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 03:26 PM

Originally Posted by dcmacdaddy

"the old Eddie Murphy route from Raw"

Let's see, now. I am referencing a stand-up comedian and a specific instance where he is doing a stand-up routine and somehow you get out of that reference that I said that Eddie Murphy said that Mr. T was gay?!?

Dude, if you didn't know Mr. T was gay then why would you assume he was gay because a stand-up comedian was making gay jokes about him. You know they can make gay jokes about straight people, right?

I just don't understand your logical process that takes you from my reference to Eddie Murphy's stand-up routine to a declarative statement about Mr. T?!?

I didn't know. Sorry.

Apple Pro Underwear · Oct 28, 2005, 03:47 PM

I LAUGHED AT THIS ONE:

2. Chicken is food, not a roommate.

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 04:01 PM

Originally Posted by Artful Dodger

halloween is forever tainted.

Funny, I don't see any t'aint. Far as I can tell it's pretty much just buns.

cjrivera · Oct 28, 2005, 04:07 PM

Originally Posted by Artful Dodger

12. It's ok if you haven't mastered the violin by age 3.

I laughed my ass off at this one.

Doofy · Oct 28, 2005, 04:16 PM

Gah! Animal booty.

Need. More. Proper. Booty.

marden · Oct 28, 2005, 04:27 PM

Originally Posted by Doofy

Gah! Poofter booty.

Need. More. Girlie. Booty.

Hers isn't orange and doesn't have jagged teeth across the cheeks. You have no appreciation for the holiday? What goes on inside that space suit when you're standing there all erect? Don't you have a heart that beats for celebration?