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Salty · Dec 13, 2005, 12:21 AM

The wind blew cold that night,
It had been blowing cold so long.
The the sun’s face lay hidden, and the wind blew cold.
That night was just one night in a human blizzard.
It had been going on so long.
Cold, frozen, numb people, fell, and fell, and fell.
Walking over them in the street,
Walking over them so long.

The wind blew warm that instant.
As a fire flickered deep in the heart of history.
It burned as the sun ever so slightly touched the earth.
And in that moment.
And in that instant, Faith revived.
Hope was born again,
As Love came in.

On that, the coldest of nights,
The sun smiled down on all generations.
Generations who would mock, ignore, and mutiny.
On that, the coldest of nights,
A little boy was met by herdsmen,
Who were just like those who he would shepherd.
On that, the coldest of nights,
A young man would submit to fathering his creator.
On that, the coldest of nights,
Tiny sun bright hands grasped for a mother’s hand.
Hands that on the darkest of days would spill red hope...

A poets words die far short.
A singers song falters to start.
A preacher’s voice goes hoarse.
A scholar’s mind goes numb.

Entering the courts,
Greeted by the same corruption condemned by Malachi.
Hearing voices that could not compare to Miriam.
Songs from hearts nothing like David.
Prophets who ignored Moses.
Priests not of Aaron.
Hearts empty of the voice in Jeremiah.
Sages blind to Solomon.
Kings still ignoring Samuel.
Men still drenched in Adam’s stain...
Standing by the alter,
He could still taste their insults on his lips,
Standing by the incense,
The cheapness haunted Him.

The oldest still to young to have them listen,
Brought into the covenant He created,
Shut out from the Holy of Holies, where he had dwelt so often.

As he grew:
Legs who’s footstool was the very earth,
Went through growing pains.
The hands which crushed Goliath,
Were washed before dinner.
The face that brought death at a glance,
Grew oily and pimpled.
The mind that crafted galaxies and water falls,
Learned carpentry.
The eyes that saw the end in the beginning,
Grew heavy as sleep drew near.
The heart that longed for humanity’s hand,
Was broken in his first crush.
The God who swallowed up Pharaoh's armies in the Red,
Ran from school yard bullies.

A poets words die far short.
A singers song falters to start.
A preacher’s voice goes hoarse.

On our darkest day,
We took hands that reached out for a mother,
And nailed them in brutality.
We took feet that took their first steps,
And pierced them without mercy.
We took a back that was swore after working with His father,
And scourged it red.
We took a brow that dripped after playing with friends,
And twisted in a mocker’s crown.
We took lips that kissed grandparents,
And gave them gaul.
We took eyes which could light the world,
And wrung them dry of tears.
We took a heart that beat faster when a pretty girl gave eye,
And made it stop in agony.

A poets words die far short.
A preacher’s voice goes hoarse.

We took this man,
We took our God.
And we nailed Him to a tree.

Doofy · Dec 13, 2005, 12:58 AM

Not Christmassy at all.

You need a girlfriend.

forkies · Dec 13, 2005, 01:19 AM

Originally Posted by Doofy

You need a girlfriend.

he's already got a boyfriend--that relationship with Jesus he keeps mentioning

it's so ****ing long, it needs some structure dude.

subego · Dec 13, 2005, 01:25 AM

Originally Posted by Salty

It had been going on so long.

Indeed.

E's Lil Theorem · Dec 13, 2005, 02:24 AM

There are about 10-15 pieces there, and of those more than half don't seem to be yours. More like you simply collected all these sayings/lines that sound "cool" and slapped them together.

Oh, and yeah, not x-masy at all.

iLikebeer · Dec 13, 2005, 04:03 AM

E, that's one hot tummy! ^^

As to the poem, you say the same thing over again in the first 3 lines, and there's still a whole lot to go. I was thinking anything but Xmas, I was thinking how cold the wind was blowing, longly. Blowing wind. Stuff. Good talk.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 04:12 AM

A poets words die far short.
A preacher’s voice goes hoarse.

We took this man,
We took our God.
And we nailed Him to a tree.

The ending had me laughing out loud.

Refreshingly blunt humor.

JoshuaZ · Dec 13, 2005, 04:57 AM

Eh. Chirstmasy enough.

RAILhead · Dec 13, 2005, 05:48 AM

Far too many words
Scrolling on my Cinema
Use the Delete key

That is all.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 06:08 AM

Originally Posted by forkies

he's already got a boyfriend--that relationship with Jesus he keeps mentioning

it's so ****ing long, it needs some structure dude.

Did your parents bring you up to be so hateful and intolerant?

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 06:24 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Did your parents bring you up to be so hateful and intolerant?

You really need to get that knee-jerk thing looked at.

One of this days you might break something in reflex.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 06:25 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

You really need to get that knee-jerk thing looked at.

One of this days you might break something in reflex.

Knee Jerk? He was being an intolerant ass. Just like you act sometimes. So it's of no surprise that you are taking up for him.

RAILhead · Dec 13, 2005, 06:42 AM

Kev --

"Forkies" is just bitter because even though he has his own "blog," he can't figure out how to get rid of the generic "Google News" and "Edit-Me" links. Not only that, he's upset that he had to make a blank post to "catch spam" even though all he has to do is turn on comment verification.

He's young. He'll grow up one of these days.

Mastrap · Dec 13, 2005, 06:43 AM

Makes me feel slightly nauseous. But I liked the ending. Made me laugh out loud.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 06:48 AM

Originally Posted by RAILhead

Kev --

"Forkies" is just bitter because even though he has his own "blog," he can't figure out how to get rid of the generic "Google News" and "Edit-Me" links. Not only that, he's upset that he had to make a blank post to "catch spam" even though all he has to do is turn on comment verification.

He's young. He'll grow up one of these days.

Is he really a kid? I did not know that. I will cut the lad some slack.

Let him get all teh angst out now so later he wont have to be shot down from a water tower.

dav · Dec 13, 2005, 07:03 AM

i couldn't read it all, imho it's not very good. i guess if you intend it to be "christmasy", i'll call it "christmasy".

JoshuaZ · Dec 13, 2005, 07:26 AM

Maybe Kev you should simmer down. I mean, take a deeeeep breath. Let it out. Then have a spot of tea. Better?

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 07:34 AM

Originally Posted by JoshuaZ

Maybe Kev you should simmer down. I mean, take a deeeeep breath. Let it out. Then have a spot of tea. Better?

Simmer down? That would require me being upset first.

Doofy · Dec 13, 2005, 07:41 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Simmer down? That would require me being upset first.

You need to generate some anger!

This should do it. Play, repeat, play, repeat, play:

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 08:45 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

He was being an intolerant ass. Just like you act sometimes.

Have I ever expressed intolerance of people who claim that anal sex causes pro-lapsed assholes, or that Michael Angelo painted the 16th Chapel?

No?

Shut up then.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 08:47 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

Have I ever expressed intolerance

Yes, yes you have.

Shut up then.

forkies · Dec 13, 2005, 08:52 AM

kevin, if you'd actually consider what i said before replying, maybe you wouldn't think everyone is just an "intolerant ass." btw, my parents are both christian. you be the judge of how that affects me (since you seem to do so).

i believe it's true that people often consider a "relationship" with jesus one significant enough to forgo a physical relationship, sometimes even other emotional relationships. maybe salty does this?

railhead, i happened to reset my blog template less than 24 hrs ago. i ****ed it up, & deemed it easier to start from scratch rather than fix it. if you want to judge my opinion by 1) my skill at coding 2) my age, then feel free. but, it's a rather weak way to back up your own opinion.

Insurgent · Dec 13, 2005, 08:53 AM

Any poem that has Old Testament characters in it makes me think of the desert - so no, not Christmassy for me. Sling in more references to Jesus (if you're aiming for the religious theme), possibly winter, and I might go for it.

The ending had me in stitches.

Stradlater · Dec 13, 2005, 08:54 AM

Salty, why are you posting your poetry here? You're not going to take any feedback, because...

A. Many people familiar with you will automatically criticize the poem, some not even reading past the first line.
B. Some anti-religious people will criticize the poem's content.

And thus, you will ignore actual criticism by telling yourself that the person didn't like your poem because they fall in the A or B group.

Oh well, let this disappointing thread continue.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 08:56 AM

Originally Posted by forkies

kevin, if you'd actually consider what i said before replying, maybe you wouldn't think everyone is just an "intolerant ass."

Oh I did. It was codescending. So is your sig. BTW, please remove me from it.

Thanks.

i believe it's true that people often consider a "relationship" with jesus one significant enough to forgo a physical relationship, sometimes even other emotional relationships. maybe salty does this?

Yes, these people are called nuns and priests. He isn't even Catholic.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:02 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Is he really a water tower.

WTF?

(Hey, selective editing is fun!)

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:04 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Yes, these people are called nuns and priests. He isn't even Catholic.

He is, however, training to be a priest, from what he's told us.

chris v · Dec 13, 2005, 09:05 AM

Originally Posted by Salty

We took this man,
We took our God.
And we nailed Him to a tree.

We? Is there a mouse in your pocket?

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 09:07 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

He is, however, training to be a priest, from what he's told us.

You positive it's a priest he is training to be?

Considering he isn't Catholic and all.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:10 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

You positive it's a priest he is training to be?

Considering he isn't Catholic and all.

I honestly don't care what you might want to call that particular function in whatever particular sect of whatever particular religion you, he, she, it, or whoever else might partake in.

You wanna split hairs, do it on your ****ing own.

Mastrap · Dec 13, 2005, 09:12 AM

You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why,
Santa Claus is tapping,
Your phone.
He's buggin your room,
He's reding your mail,
He's keeping a file
And runnin a tail
Santa Claus is tapping
Your phone

He hears you in the bedroom
Surveills you out of doors
And if that doesn't get the goods
Then he'll use provocateurs.

So you mustn't assume
That you are secure
On Christmas Eve
He'll kick in your door
Santa Claus is tapping
Your phone

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:13 AM

Verdict: Christmassy.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 09:14 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

I honestly don't care what you might want to call that particular function in whatever particular sect of whatever particular religion you, he, she, it, or whoever else might partake in.

You wanna split hairs, do it on your ****ing own.

It's not splitting hairs. Preists, Pastors, Preacher, etc all are different.

One doesn't get married, one does.

So for him wanting to be a Pastor has nothing to do with what you or forkies was trying to project.

You two were just being hateful asses.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:18 AM

I was hateful?

<Kevin>
Show me where I said that.
</Kevin>

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 09:34 AM

Well lets see, after he posting this wanting SERIOUS constructive criticism, you posted this

Originally Posted by analogika

The ending had me laughing out loud.

Refreshingly blunt humor.

When you knew it wasn't meant to be funny. You were being condescending and hateful.

These next to speak for themselves.

Originally Posted by analogika

You wanna split hairs, do it on your ****ing own.

Originally Posted by analogika

No?

Shut up then.

I think the problem is, you don't realize how your reaction comes off.

For example. I am not requesting you two to "Shut up" that not only would be pretentious, it would be hateful.

I am requesting you two mind your manners, and not turn this into another lame "I hate religion darn nabbit!" thread.

RAILhead · Dec 13, 2005, 09:37 AM

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 09:42 AM

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:45 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Well lets see, after he posting this wanting SERIOUS constructive criticism, you posted this

When you knew it wasn't meant to be funny. You were being condescending and hateful.

Honest.

Slightly condescending, maybe.

But I guffawed at the ending.

Telling somebody who's asking whether something is "Christmasy" that it is, in fact, inadvertently funny, is "hateful", eh?

Originally Posted by Kevin

I am requesting you two mind your manners, and not turn this into another lame "I hate religion darn nabbit!" thread.

You will have a very tough time ever finding an anti-religious post by me, Kevin, because, to my knowledge, I don't think I've ever made one.

Don't mix me in with other people and their perceived "agendas".

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:47 AM

Originally Posted by RAILhead

That should say "Kevin et al.", but otherwise,

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 09:50 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

Honest.

Slightly condescending, maybe.

But I guffawed at the ending.

Good, you should have kept it to yourself.

Telling somebody who's asking whether something is "Christmasy" that it is, in fact, inadvertently funny, is "hateful", eh?

Tell us what is funny about it?

You will have a very tough time ever finding an anti-religious post by me, Kevin, because, to my knowledge, I don't think I've ever made one.

Your very sig is a mockery of a prominent religious figure analog.
You do realise that right?

Originally Posted by analogika

That should say "Kevin et al.", but otherwise,

That just proves your perception of this thread and it's posts are offbase.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 09:57 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Good, you should have kept it to yourself.

**** you if I'm asked for my opinion, you're quite the presumptuous asshole to deny me the right to give it.

Originally Posted by Kevin

Your very sig is a mockery of a prominent religious figure analog.
You do realise that right?

Nah.

My God has a great sense of humor and loves the dance.

I don't dare talk to yours - he'd probably smite we with something.

Originally Posted by Kevin

That just proves your perception of this thread and it's posts are offbase.

Or yours.

Agree to disagree. Now leave me alone.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 10:16 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

**** you if I'm asked for my opinion, you're quite the presumptuous asshole to deny me the right to give it.

Talk about knee jerk. I never asked or even denied you a right to give an opinion of what was asked.

He wasn't asking anyone if they thought "It was funny" esp a part that wasn't MEANT to be funny. You even admitted to being codescending about it.

BTW, Why didn't you answer me as to why you found it humorous analogue?

What was funny about those sentences you quoted?

I mean if you are going to be condescending, ateleast explain yourself.

Nah.

My God has a great sense of humor and loves the dance.

I don't dare talk to yours - he'd probably smite we with something.

Regardless of what you believe, it is offensive.

[b]Now leave me alone.

A good way to get me to leave you alone is to not post such silliness.

Yes, it's THAT easy.

BlueSky · Dec 13, 2005, 10:18 AM

Simma don. Just simma don.

Simma. Don.

Simmmmmaaaa donnnnnn.

Simma don.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 10:27 AM

Originally Posted by Kevin

What was funny about those sentences you quoted?

I know better than to try and explain humor to you.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 10:42 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

I know better than to try and explain humor to you.

Oh please, what a copout. (Yet another hateful comment from you in this thread)

Then explain it to the rest of the forum.

I think we all know why you don't want to.

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 10:48 AM

Doofy · Dec 13, 2005, 10:52 AM

<insert witty comment about German humour being a little odd. and try not to mention the war*>

* British humour.

(I still haven't forgiven the German government/people/pets/farm animals for letting Waldorf go bump)

analogika · Dec 13, 2005, 11:02 AM

Originally Posted by Doofy

(I still haven't forgiven the German government/people/pets/farm animals for letting Waldorf go bump)

I'm not entirely sure any of us had anything to do with that so much as the international market no longer sustaining the company.

In which case, y'all would be as much to blame as we.

But then, I'm not too well-informed on the background of the Waldorf demise.

As for German humour...Mastrap had pretty much the exact same reaction to the original "poem" as I, so you may be onto something there...

(but don't tell me you didn't think the ending was funny)

Doofy · Dec 13, 2005, 11:14 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

I'm not entirely sure any of us had anything to do with that so much as the international market no longer sustaining the company.

In which case, y'all would be as much to blame as we.

But then, I'm not too well-informed on the background of the Waldorf demise.

I rather think it was more to do with the increase of virtual (TDM, etc) synth use/purchase by the philistines. Just before I was going to order a couple of Waves too. I wasn't happy about that.

Originally Posted by analogika

As for German humour...Mastrap had pretty much the exact same reaction to the original "poem" as I, so you may be onto something there...

'Tis true. You guys tend to have a very dry sense of humour which most English-speaking folk don't get. I get it, but then I'm at the very dry end of British humour.

Originally Posted by analogika

(but don't tell me you didn't think the ending was funny)

I'd pretty much lost the will to live by that point.

Kevin · Dec 13, 2005, 11:27 AM

Originally Posted by analogika

As for German humour...Mastrap had pretty much the exact same reaction to the original "poem" as I, so you may be onto something there...

(but don't tell me you didn't think the ending was funny)

Because you two share similar beliefs.

Go on tell us what was funny.