[Salty]

OK, gentlemen, I desire to express my interests to a certainly lady on campus (yes you read that right!). Problem is I have this big problem of... not really wanting to risk rejection. Worst of all to add complications to the situation I have heard that this certainly lady (the hot one who I let play with my iPod last week for anyone paying attention) has a boy friend, that said she's never once mentioned him in the many times that we've talked. That said... I'm really figuring out if a girl is genuinely interested, partly because any real signs they give I'm generally the type that assumes they don't mean it... incidentally I also suck at taking complements .
So, what sorts of things do you normally drop into a conversation to check the reaction? Oh and do you normally end up going out with someone because you've been friends and you go to another level, or do you just randomly meet at a bar and go from there or?

[SSharon]

Good luck with the ladies salty. Make sure she is really open though, or least make sure you are bigger than the other guy. Best way to figure her intentions is to ask her friends.

[Mastrap]

If you don't want to risk rejection I foresee a life of loneliness for you.

[Andy8]

Why not just see each other as friends for while and see what happens, no need to plan or think too much. Cause if you can not start as friends, little chance of anything else happening down the track.

Friendships are the basis for everything.

[himself]

First, ask her if she has a boyfriend. How she responds to that will give you a big hint as to how to proceed.

[Tyler McAdams]

Originally Posted by Mastrap

If you don't want to risk rejection I foresee a life of loneliness for you.

Seconded. If you never face the fear of rejection you:

A. Never overcome that fear.

B. Can never use it as a mechanism for understanding "where you stand" and how to make yourself a better person. Not exactly what you wanted to hear right? Take whatever it is that makes you rejected and work on it, You might become a better person from it. (Yes I do it myself.)

[forkies]

stop fooling yourself

[Kerrigan]

English translation:

OK, gentlemen, I'm interested in a certain lady on campus (yes you read that right!). Problem is, I don't want to risk rejection. Worst of all, I have heard that this certain lady has a boyfriend. She's never once mentioned him in the many times that we've talked.

That said, I need help figuring out if this girl is genuinely interested, partly because I can't pick up on her signs. Incidentally I also suck at taking complements .

So, what sorts of things do you normally drop into a conversation to check the reaction? Do you normally end up going out with someone because you've been friends and you go to another level, or do you just randomly meet at a bar and go from there?

[Kevin]

Use this poem.

I laid eyes upon you and my heart was smitten.
Without your warming touch my soul grows frost bitten.
Now please remove your skirt so I may play with your kitten.

She will either laugh, or smack you.

[Spliffdaddy]

Don't worry about her having a boyfriend. Just ignore that situation.

Does she have a nice ass?

That's the important thing here.

[hayesk]

Originally Posted by Salty

Problem is I have this big problem of... not really wanting to risk rejection.

Hmm... let's look at the options:

Keep mouth shut: don't have girl
Get rejected: don't have girl

What do you have to lose? Let her know. The worst that can happen is that you will be in the same situation as you are now.

[Doofy]

Right then. Shut your geeky mouths 'coz I'm listening to Marvin Gaye so I know what I'm on about.

1) Salty, do not attempt to make friends with this young lady. The last place you want to be is in the "friends zone" - you wanna be fresh for this relationship. Google "cuddle bitch" for the results of not taking heed of this advice. Sure sometimes it works out, but more often than not it's best to start from fresh.

2) You are not aware of her having a boyfriend. No siree. No idea. Got that?

3) Rejection? It's not in your repertoire dude. Chicks don't reject you - they merely bide their time while they get rid of their boyfriends. Got that? Get that in your head before you approach her because they can smell the fear of rejection on you and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

4) Here's the crunch. Ask her where you're going on your first date together. Not if she wants to come on a date with you - because you're the hottest guy in Winnepeg and it's obvious that as a heterosexual female she wants you.

You'll get a number of different results:

1) She'll tell you where you're going on the date.
2) She'll tell you she has a boyfriend (which means "not at the moment" not "no").
3) She'll laugh. Good sign. Work harder.
4) She'll shout at you to the effect of "you're a presumptuous git aren't you?". In which case she's probably some kind of feminist and you don't want to date her anyways.

Now, you'll notice that this doesn't address the question you asked about how to tell if she's interested. Reason being is that it's the wrong approach. Of course she's interested - you rock! That's the mindset to have. Remember Doubting Thomas? There ya go. Move that mountain.

There ya go. Go to it. Report back.
This one's for free but I'm going to have to start charging for this service.

[boots]

Yeah, splif's got it right. Just walk in and lay it down. It works or it doesn't. Forget the rest.

She's got back, right?

[Spliffdaddy]

I mean, for real. Don't pimp yourself out unless that ass is righteous*.

All time is wasted - except the time spent gazing at a nice butt.

Pretty girls are a dime a dozen. The perfect ass is one in a million.

*Disclaimer: If she's a redhead, then the quality of her ass almost doesn't matter

[Spliffdaddy]

Anybody get the feeling that Monique is gonna be mad at me?

[meelk]

tell her you posted her picture on face the jury and she got a 2, which puts her blow your 3, so youre an obvious match.

[jersey]

Originally Posted by Spliffdaddy

... *Disclaimer: If she's a redhead, then the quality of her ass almost doesn't matter

i have seen some banged up readheads in my day. they are either ass ugly or silly hot.

[boots]

Originally Posted by jersey

i have seen some banged up readheads in my day. they are either ass ugly or silly hot.

yeah. there doesn't seem to be an in-between.

I used to drool any time one walked by. Now it's blonde hair that catches my eye. Meh. I'm to old to do anything but lear anyway.

[macaddict0001]

Originally Posted by meelk

tell her you posted her picture on face the jury and she got a 2, which puts her blow your 3, so youre an obvious match.

Yeah thats got to be amazing for someone's self esteem.
Just remember, were all just horny bastards who want to be ****ed.

[greenamp]

Originally Posted by Doofy

Right then. Shut your geeky mouths 'coz I'm listening to Marvin Gaye so I know what I'm on about.

1) Salty, do not attempt to make friends with this young lady. The last place you want to be is in the "friends zone" - you wanna be fresh for this relationship. Google "cuddle bitch" for the results of not taking heed of this advice. Sure sometimes it works out, but more often than not it's best to start from fresh.

2) You are not aware of her having a boyfriend. No siree. No idea. Got that?

3) Rejection? It's not in your repertoire dude. Chicks don't reject you - they merely bide their time while they get rid of their boyfriends. Got that? Get that in your head before you approach her because they can smell the fear of rejection on you and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

4) Here's the crunch. Ask her where you're going on your first date together. Not if she wants to come on a date with you - because you're the hottest guy in Winnepeg and it's obvious that as a heterosexual female she wants you.

You'll get a number of different results:

1) She'll tell you where you're going on the date.
2) She'll tell you she has a boyfriend (which means "not at the moment" not "no").
3) She'll laugh. Good sign. Work harder.
4) She'll shout at you to the effect of "you're a presumptuous git aren't you?". In which case she's probably some kind of feminist and you don't want to date her anyways.

Now, you'll notice that this doesn't address the question you asked about how to tell if she's interested. Reason being is that it's the wrong approach. Of course she's interested - you rock! That's the mindset to have. Remember Doubting Thomas? There ya go. Move that mountain.

There ya go. Go to it. Report back.
This one's for free but I'm going to have to start charging for this service.

Great advice

[Weyland-Yutani]

Originally Posted by Doofy

Right then. Shut your geeky mouths 'coz I'm listening to Marvin Gaye so I know what I'm on about.

1) Salty, do not attempt to make friends with this young lady. The last place you want to be is in the "friends zone" - you wanna be fresh for this relationship. Google "cuddle bitch" for the results of not taking heed of this advice. Sure sometimes it works out, but more often than not it's best to start from fresh.

2) You are not aware of her having a boyfriend. No siree. No idea. Got that?

3) Rejection? It's not in your repertoire dude. Chicks don't reject you - they merely bide their time while they get rid of their boyfriends. Got that? Get that in your head before you approach her because they can smell the fear of rejection on you and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

4) Here's the crunch. Ask her where you're going on your first date together. Not if she wants to come on a date with you - because you're the hottest guy in Winnepeg and it's obvious that as a heterosexual female she wants you.

You'll get a number of different results:

1) She'll tell you where you're going on the date.
2) She'll tell you she has a boyfriend (which means "not at the moment" not "no").
3) She'll laugh. Good sign. Work harder.
4) She'll shout at you to the effect of "you're a presumptuous git aren't you?". In which case she's probably some kind of feminist and you don't want to date her anyways.

Now, you'll notice that this doesn't address the question you asked about how to tell if she's interested. Reason being is that it's the wrong approach. Of course she's interested - you rock! That's the mindset to have. Remember Doubting Thomas? There ya go. Move that mountain.

There ya go. Go to it. Report back.
This one's for free but I'm going to have to start charging for this service.

Good solid advice. Works anywhere in the western world.

cheers

W-Y

[Tyler McAdams]

Originally Posted by macaddict0001

Just remember, were all just horny bastards who want to be ****ed.

And on that note... uh

[dcmacdaddy]

Originally Posted by SSharon

Good luck with the ladies salty. Make sure she is really open though, or least make sure you are bigger than the other guy. Best way to figure her intentions is to ask her friends.

OK. The first two times I read this I thought "Make sure she is really open" and make sure that "you are bigger than the other guy" was referring to anatomy.

Looks like I need to get my mind out of the gutter . . . or not.

[SirCastor]

I reinforce Doofy's posting.

That said, don't fear rejection. Rejection happens, right? If she doesn't want to go out with you...
Ask her again in a month.

[dcmacdaddy]

Oh and Salty, if she says "No" wrap a tie around your belt-loop and go talk to her brother.

[Kevin]

I think certain people in here have homo-erotic fantasies about Salty.

[macaddict0001]

Oh and I forgot there are certain times during a woman's cycle when they are more likely to accept you. I think you should ask about 2 weeks after a full moon.

[mc786030]

Just tell/ask her. Rejection is better than regret.

He who hesitates, masturbates.

Keep us posted on how it goes.

[d4nth3m4n]

1. go to place with alcohol
2. drink said alcohol
3. casually ask about boyfriend situation
4. if no boyfriend, then talk and talk and talk and talk while slowly moving to a point where you put your hand on her thigh and then move in for the kiss.
5. yeah, whatever.

or, uh, just tell her how you feel and deal with the possibility of rejection.

[Kr0nos]

Originally Posted by Salty

So, what sorts of things do you normally drop into a conversation to check the reaction?

Move the converstion to a "sexual topic". If she completely refuses to talk about the subject, forget it. If she picks up on the "theme", set up a situation where you can get intimate...then make your move (be creative).

Don't "formally" ask her out on a date. Be in control of the situation.

It's better to ask for forgiveness, than to beg for permission.

Originally Posted by Salty

Oh and do you normally end up going out with someone because you've been friends and you go to another level,

No way. You're either in the "box" or you're not ('xcuse the pun). I wasted my entire youth thinking like this. Look up the "ladder theory". It's still pretty accurate.

Originally Posted by Salty

or do you just randomly meet at a bar and go from there or?

Yes. It either works from the start, or it takes another 2 or 3 weeks of "warming up" (no matter what anybody here says, most women want to know what they are getting themselves into, and that they are not "just another lay").

[Edit] All of the edvice in this thread is worthless, if you have no "tact". I.e. know when to say what etc.

[JoshuaZ]

Originally Posted by forkies

stop fooling yourself

Must you be so negative? Give the man a chance!

Clearly, a very casual approach is needed to better assess the situation before making a move. Or just try and become slightly drunk. Drinking is your friend.

[Salty]

Wow, Doofy you sound.... almost exactly like a female friend on campus who gave... well not quite as good advice but... thank you that genuinely means something ... I think I'm going to tell her... next week of course cause I'm going home tomorrow but... tune in on Tuesday .

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Kr0nos

Move the converstion to a "sexual topic". If she completely refuses to talk about the subject, forget it. If she picks up on the "theme", set up a situation where you can get intimate...then make your move (be creative).

[Edit] All of the edvice in this thread is worthless, if you have no "tact". I.e. know when to say what etc.

Do not move the conversation onto a "sexual topic". That's the exact opposite of having "tact" in the matter.

If you use my approach, you don't need tact, because the first thing you say to her will be "So where are we going on our first date?". The phrase doesn't require tact at all, just a relaxed calmness. No skirting around the issue, no testing the waters.

[Kr0nos]

Originally Posted by Doofy

Do not move the conversation onto a "sexual topic". That's the exact opposite of having "tact" in the matter.

Depends on your timing (and tact). Of course I didn't mean anything "krass" or overtly "graphic".

Originally Posted by Doofy

If you use my approach, you don't need tact, because the first thing you say to her will be "So where are we going on our first date?". The phrase doesn't require tact at all, just a relaxed calmness.

Bullsh1t. This phrase at the wrong point in time will be absolutely worthless.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Kr0nos

Depends on your timing (and tact). Of course I didn't mean anything "krass" or overtly "graphic".

Hmmm... Best stay clear altogether for those not acutely aware of body language and how the conversation flow is running, if you ask me. Just to be on the safe side, you know - I know guys who if I gave that advice to them they'd just end up with the girl (and all her friends) avoiding him for all eternity. It's too fine a line to work it properly without some major experience in the field.

Originally Posted by Kr0nos

Bullsh1t. This phrase at the wrong point in time will be absolutely worthless.

Road tested it in all sorts of conditions. Works for me (and I'm not gifted with the greatest tact in the world).

[Kevin]

Doofy just give it up. Kr0nos/Warung knows everything about everything.

Just ask him.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Kevin

Doofy just give it up.

Done. I believe Salty's original request has been dealt with adequately, so no need to continue.

[Kr0nos]

Originally Posted by Doofy

It's too fine a line to work it properly without some major experience in the field.

Yeah, I get what you're saying. Hence my "tact" comment.

Forget what I wrote Salty...ask her wehter she likes the plug- and play options she has with your iPod instead.

Originally Posted by Doofy

Road tested it in all sorts of conditions. Works for me (and I'm not gifted with the greatest tact in the world).

I've tried that a couple of times, and it actually has worked pretty well. But again, I wouldn't say it's a 100% sure method all the time.

Whatever works for you though.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by Doofy

Done. I believe Salty's original request has been dealt with adequately, so no need to continue.

BTW is that a 800 in your sig? Fools are paying out the nose for those now.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Kevin

BTW is that a 800 in your sig? Fools are paying out the nose for those now.

Yep. Love 'em. Especially the reissues - that added effects loop on the back works wonders with a bit of post-gain graphic (secret of the perfect rock hi-gain sound: bump up front and scoop in the loop). They're about $1,700 here ATM.

[Kevin]

Yeah I know all about the EQ in the loop trick. I just like the 900 series and on Marshalls more than the 800. I like the raw un EQ'd Marshall sound though. Plus my PRS as already "sweet" enough sounding.

I do put my chorus and delay in my loop. And instead of putting a booster in the front, I put my compressor there.

BTW, the delay pedal in my sig, is my new toy. The Boss DD-20. Best delay pedal I have ever owned.

Costs like it as well.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Kevin

I just like the 900 series and on Marshalls more than the 800.

Inside every Doofy, there's a full-on 80's hair-metaller trying to get out.

Originally Posted by Kevin

BTW, the delay pedal in my sig, is my new toy. The Boss DD-20. Best delay pedal I have ever owned.

Sweet. I like Boss stuff.

[Kevin]

It has a "reverse" mode. It plays the echos back in reverse. The thing is, you can totally cut out your original guitar signal, set for a short delay. And you can play backwards stuff live.

I love it.

It has a tape and analog delay features too that sound great.

[ism]

Don't talk to her. I talked to a girl once and now we are married and have a kid, 3 dogs and a goldfish. I have no free time, no friends, it's either work or housework whilst being talked at by an insane 4 year old or an insane 26 year old. Seriously, stay gay and stay free.

[wdlove]

I wish you success salty. The best thing is to be open and honest. Show her respect.

[forkies]

Originally Posted by ism

stay gay and stay free.

Originally Posted by wdlove

be open and honest. Show her respect.

my point exactly

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by wdlove

The best thing is to be open and honest. Show her respect.

Right.

Walk up to her, and ask
You: "Wanna fsck ?"
She: "Uhm, no, thanks anyway."
You: "Ok, then let's have a coffee."
She: "Much gooder."
You: "Cool."

[BlueSky]

Originally Posted by what_the_heck

Walk up to her, and ask
You: "Wanna dance ?"
She: "Uhm, no, thanks anyway."
You: "I take it a bj would be out of the question."
She: "Hmmm..."

Slightly modified.

[RAILhead]

Late to the party, but here's my advice:

GROW SOME NADS AND HIT IT.

Who cares about the details? You aren't married, so she's free game. Doof stole my thunder as far as asking her out, too. I wish I knew what pansy-arse hippie thought of that idea! Everyone knows that women ask men out, men don't ask women out. Men do what Doof said, and ask where the woman would like to go or what she'd like to do when you go this weekend.

It's all about the nads, man. Don't be a pansy. Invite her to your apt or house whatever. Tell her you want to take her to dinner.

[Hash]

Originally Posted by Mastrap

If you don't want to risk rejection I foresee a life of loneliness for you.

Damn, was it a good advice..having said that, sometimes rejection teaches you a lot. but then you lose nothing perhaps.. can I rephrase this great expression like this

One who fears rejection will be lonely forever