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iranfromthezoo · Feb 10, 2007, 09:59 PM

Ahh...man I just went off on someone and it felt very refreshing.....Somewhat high schoolish but still..

I have this friend who is a girl (i'm a guy and believe it I have a girl thats a friend) Anyways she called me all the time and talked to me for 3 or 4 hours every night....it didnt bother me cause she was hot. Well anyways she comes with me to work at a camp I design for. that camp was only a few mins from my house so we stay at my house. Well anyways she talks the entire time and calls me a lot.

It's been four weeks since the camp....she has not talked to me. She told her friend who happens to be really good friends with me that I was a great guy but she was confused....I was like okay thats cool...so I give her space...well finally after not answering phone calls I literally lay into her because I have nothing to loose now...she doesn't talk to me anymore. I just told her off and how immature she handles things and how hard shes going to have it in the real world when she gets out of college because if this is how you deal with stuff that makes you confused or uncomfortable but avoiding it your setting yourself for a fall...I told her I will be her when she needs me but she needs to grow up learn how to deal with it because there will always be times when shes uncomfortable.

anyone have any similar situations....I mean dang I would understand if we were dating but I told her straight up we were not going to date! Oh well...I'm tired of this high school BS!

Eug · Feb 10, 2007, 10:27 PM

BlueSky · Feb 10, 2007, 11:04 PM

You completely blew it.

Big Mac · Feb 11, 2007, 12:01 AM

Wait a minute, just why do you feel vindicated?

IceEnclosure · Feb 11, 2007, 12:13 AM

Eug makes a good point.

And, you proved that maybe you can't have a hot girl that's a friend. You got bent when the situation changed. Had it been a dude friend you wouldn't have been all WTF about it with him.

Just write it off as another hot girl you maybe coulda felt up but didn't cause you were nice.

was she lose? that woulda been tight!

IceEnclosure · Feb 11, 2007, 12:14 AM

Originally Posted by Big Mac

Wait a minute, just why do you feel vindicated?

he forgot to mention how he burned down her car.

torsoboy · Feb 11, 2007, 12:19 AM

I don't get it. Why did you blow up at her? Because she wont talk to you anymore because she is confused and needs some time away? Sounds like you might be the immature one on this example.

Congrats on causing that friend to be lost for good. Though I am not sure why you would feel vindictaed because of it. If you are "tired of this high school BS", maybe you should stop contributing to it?

Eug · Feb 11, 2007, 12:22 AM

paul w · Feb 11, 2007, 12:27 AM

I don't understand. You were truly her friend or you basically put up with her because she was hot? Reading your little rant is like being transported back to...well the usual high school BS.

Eug · Feb 11, 2007, 12:30 AM

Chuckit · Feb 11, 2007, 12:44 AM

I have to concur with everyone that I don't really see why you laid into her or why it was satisfying if you weren't looking for, y'know, "benefits."

I also have to concur that it's spelled "lose."

hickey · Feb 11, 2007, 12:46 AM

thanks eug.

brassplayersrock² · Feb 11, 2007, 01:05 AM

ah man! you blew it man! you could of had a hot girl as your girlfriend man!

well...in this case, the word "man" is used loosely....

-a

goMac · Feb 11, 2007, 01:17 AM

Don't ever lay into a girl for being "confused". Bad idea. Bad bad idea. Basically you showed her instead of being a calm cool collected guy, you are demanding and immature, which helped her make up her mind.

You blew it++

iMOTOR · Feb 11, 2007, 03:38 AM

Chicks that work at camps are usually very "loose". I know about these things.

This thread is probably worthless without pix.

Oh and:

You blew it teh big time, Pal

RAILhead · Feb 11, 2007, 07:39 AM

What a minute: you told her to grow up?

Eug · Feb 11, 2007, 07:42 AM

Doofy · Feb 11, 2007, 07:57 AM

For the record, iranfromthezoo, "confused" means "she wants your sausage".

You blew it (the situation, not the sausage - nobody's going to be blowing the sausage any time soon by the sounds of it).

Oh, and what's with all this "so I give her space" feminised crapola? Go google "cuddle bitch".

iranfromthezoo · Feb 11, 2007, 09:30 AM

okay so let me clarify....I know where you are coming from. But the story goes a little deeper than I am saying but I really don't want to share that.

IceEnclosure · Feb 11, 2007, 09:35 AM

then I guess you're also prepared to not share your knockwurst.

Doofy · Feb 11, 2007, 09:38 AM

Originally Posted by iranfromthezoo

okay so let me clarify....I know where you are coming from. But the story goes a little deeper than I am saying but I really don't want to share that.

Go on... ...it's not like we actually know who you are or anything. Change the names to protect the innocent or something.

USB HUB · Feb 11, 2007, 09:48 AM

If there is more to the story .. then we don't have all the facts. But what I can interpret is you should apologize (if you really want her to be a friend (not just because she's hot!))
Sounds like you didn't want to date .. she's calls you alot and that's okay because she's hot.
Then you go to camp together and she's stay at your house (what happened there is none of my business)
And now she's confused. Did you come on for a one night stand???
That might of confused her ... if you were talking out of both sides of your mouth.
But that is for you to decide ...

zro · Feb 11, 2007, 10:26 AM

Confused means she likes having you around but knows you want to knock boots while she doesn't. That's not likely to change, so I can't really blame you for being pissed about her wasting your time. She knew the moment she saw you whether or not you two were gonna ****. You blew it before you told her off.

iranfromthezoo · Feb 11, 2007, 05:20 PM

Originally Posted by USB HUB

If there is more to the story .. then we don't have all the facts. But what I can interpret is you should apologize (if you really want her to be a friend (not just because she's hot!))
Sounds like you didn't want to date .. she's calls you alot and that's okay because she's hot.
Then you go to camp together and she's stay at your house (what happened there is none of my business)
And now she's confused. Did you come on for a one night stand???
That might of confused her ... if you were talking out of both sides of your mouth.
But that is for you to decide ...

A: I had no intention of having sex with her. Let's just go ahead and clear the stage on that one.

B: We talked about where we wanted to head in the relationship and we both agreed on nothing more than friends.

C: From what I`ve gathered from her friends is that she does this stuff on a regular basis with all types of people. She's one of those people who let people get close to her and then shuts them off....I don't know if that make sense. I thought that wouldn't be the same but I was wrong. I tried to apologize if I sent wrong signals or what-not but I mean she refuses to talk to me (before this episode which was last night). She has also like stopped talking to everyone in our "group" like she plays tennis here at college and will not talk to anyone on the team....Her doubles partner and I are really good friends and she will not even talk to her....so something tells me there is more....I just wish I knew...

I know blowing up probably wasn't the right thing to do...but how do you handle that situation?

brassplayersrock² · Feb 11, 2007, 05:23 PM

she probably had a really awesome relationship, and got super close with someone just for that person to screw her over some way. so for that not to happen, she just doesn;t trust anyone, and pushes herself away before anything happens so that she wont get hurt again. i use to be like that, but found that trusting people and having friends longer then a couple months was better

-a

are her parents divorced by chance?

iranfromthezoo · 05:38 PM

brass....

No but her parents situation isn't a good one....

She is from SC and going to school here in Mississippi. When she was gone for the holidays her parents were really pressuring her to go to Winthrop (sp??) University rather than the University of Southern Mississippi. Her father flew for NWA but was laid off so money is really tight for them also. Her parents are afraid of losing her and such because her other sister lives her in MS and her brother is a little messed up with drugs. Her "friends" that she hangs out with now are also not very good (in my opinion) last year she did nothing but get drunk and party every weekend. This year she hasn't done that at all and the friends she is hanging out with now are the kind of friends where you have to be like them to hang out with and it really pressures her sometimes....

Also one thing that I don't know if she gets but because I work for WBR I get tons of unreleased CD's and tshirts and I usually give them away to my friends and I gave her around 6 shirts and 15-20 cd's and she could have read into that...I dont know why though when she saw me do the same thing for other people.

brassplayersrock² · Feb 11, 2007, 05:44 PM

from your first post: "she doesn't talk to me anymore"
then,
"the friends she is hanging out with now are the kind of friends where you have to be like them to hang out with"

think about that part for a bit

ajprice · Feb 11, 2007, 05:48 PM

So you can spell vindicated, but not spell lose?

I've read your story, and I wish I had RAILhead's rats ass progress bar picture when I needed it.

macintologist · Feb 11, 2007, 05:55 PM

Originally Posted by ajprice

So you can spell vindicated, but not spell lose?

I've read your story, and I wish I had RAILhead's rats ass progress bar picture when I needed it.

You mean this one?

http://www.railheaddesign.com/fark/ra02.gif

ajprice · Feb 11, 2007, 05:56 PM

Yeah thats the one!

brassplayersrock² · Feb 11, 2007, 06:02 PM

Originally Posted by ajprice

So you can spell vindicated, but not spell lose?

I've read your story, and I wish I had RAILhead's rats ass progress bar picture when I needed it.

iranfromthezoo · Feb 11, 2007, 06:07 PM

brass...I know what your saying....well she was in a group of us around 8 of us....and she just left us for two other people and she barely talks to them...only during tennis practice....like she has become a recluse....but she wont even talk to her doubles partner....just those two....we just cant figure out why.

Doofy · Feb 11, 2007, 06:27 PM

She wanted your sausage and you denied it to her, that's why.

If a girl is spending 3-4 hours per night talking to you on the phone, you're either her cuddle bitch or she wants your lovin'. Period. Now, what you have to do is work out which one of those two options is the one which applies. I'm gonna guess it's the latter, as spending 3-4 hours per night on the phone to you indicates that she didn't have a boyfriend.

If you don't want to give her some lovin' then why are you so bothered about it? Like, bothered enough about it to post it to a forum? Why would you actually tell us that you didn't mind her calling you "because she's hot" if you didn't fancy her enough to date her?

There's something strange going on here, for sure. Will we be expecting a coming out thread sometime soon?

(Sorry dude - I call it like I see it)

SpaceMonkey · Feb 11, 2007, 06:29 PM

Please. Tell us more.

Eug · Feb 11, 2007, 07:03 PM

USB HUB · Feb 12, 2007, 05:12 AM

Originally Posted by iranfromthezoo

A: I had no intention of having sex with her. Let's just go ahead and clear the stage on that one.

B: We talked about where we wanted to head in the relationship and we both agreed on nothing more than friends.

C: From what I`ve gathered from her friends is that she does this stuff on a regular basis with all types of people. She's one of those people who let people get close to her and then shuts them off....I don't know if that make sense. I thought that wouldn't be the same but I was wrong. I tried to apologize if I sent wrong signals or what-not but I mean she refuses to talk to me (before this episode which was last night). She has also like stopped talking to everyone in our "group" like she plays tennis here at college and will not talk to anyone on the team....Her doubles partner and I are really good friends and she will not even talk to her....so something tells me there is more....I just wish I knew...

I know blowing up probably wasn't the right thing to do...but how do you handle that situation?

sounds like she does have some issues. And if she does this to everyone then I can see you need to go on and foreget her. Sounds like she has some serious problems ...

RAILhead · Feb 12, 2007, 06:27 AM

Kevin · 07:41 AM

Man did you screw up. You should have acted like you didn't care either way and she would have been eating out of your hand.

THEN you could have told her off. After of course making her make goat noises in embarrassing positions.

wolfen · Feb 12, 2007, 06:59 AM

I've had 4 or more women treat me this way. At least 2 in college, and 2 after I was married.

In all cases I would have to say that the people did not really know themselves very well and were generally unhappy people. They didn't know what real friendship is, and benefited from learning it with people they felt safe with. The problem is, once they felt safe the closeness scared them. (Life ain't all about sex) In their lives, Closeness = Being Controlled.

Telling us her parents are "afraid to lose her" is a big point, and shows where she comes from. A very sad place, IMHO. Anyway, I will hope and pray she is able to find someone she can really trust and cares about her to teach her the ropes of friendship.

shifuimam · Feb 12, 2007, 10:44 AM

Originally Posted by IceEnclosure

was she lose? that woulda been tight!

Wrong.

Originally Posted by Chuckit

I also have to concur that it's spelled "lose."

Wrong.

Originally Posted by iMOTOR

Chicks that work at camps are usually very "loose". I know about these things.

Right.

Bad grammar and spelling make me so, so sad.

Chuckit · Feb 12, 2007, 10:47 AM

Originally Posted by shifuimam

Wrong.

Uh, no, I'm fairly sure "nothing to loose" is not how the phrase normally goes.

Railroader · Feb 12, 2007, 10:53 AM

Originally Posted by shifuimam

Bad grammar and spelling make me so, so sad.

And people not getting a joke make me so, so sad.

IceEnclosure · Feb 12, 2007, 01:08 PM

Originally Posted by shifuimam

Wrong.

Wrong.

Right.

Bad grammar and spelling make me so, so sad.

you are a REJECT. You lose.

Railroader · Feb 12, 2007, 01:41 PM

Originally Posted by IceEnclosure

you are a REJECT. You loose.

Fixed™.

I HATE fixed™ posts, but this one deserves it!!!

IceEnclosure · Feb 12, 2007, 02:49 PM

like throwing a pencil down a hallway?

Kevin · Feb 12, 2007, 03:30 PM

Lets just say he wont be hitting the back of that tuna can...

turtle777 · Feb 12, 2007, 04:30 PM

Ok, how old are you ? How old is she ?

Secondly, no, you can't be just friends with hot women. Unless you are teh ghey. WhyTF don't they teach that at school ?

-t

Chuckit · Feb 12, 2007, 06:50 PM

Originally Posted by turtle777

Secondly, no, you can't be just friends with hot women. Unless you are teh ghey.

What if they're basically cool people, but have relationship issues up the wazoo? There are lots of girls I hang out with regularly who are great fun just to hang out with — completely sane outside of a relationship — but I wouldn't date if you paid me.

turtle777 · Feb 13, 2007, 10:52 AM

Originally Posted by Chuckit

What if they're basically cool people, but have relationship issues up the wazoo? There are lots of girls I hang out with regularly who are great fun just to hang out with — completely sane outside of a relationship — but I wouldn't date if you paid me.

Fine, but you don't consider these women hot, because you know the downside.

-t

Dakar² · Feb 13, 2007, 10:55 AM

Originally Posted by turtle777

Ok, how old are you ? How old is she ?

Secondly, no, you can't be just friends with hot women. Unless you are teh ghey. WhyTF don't they teach that at school ?

-t

You get a cookie

Harry Burns: You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Sally Albright: Why not?
Harry Burns: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Sally Albright: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Harry Burns: No you don't.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: No you don't.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: You only think you do.
Sally Albright: You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Harry Burns: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: How do you know?
Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.