[turtle777]

Originally Posted by Cold Warrior 

What about writing it off on your taxes? If it's a second home, can you treat it as an investment property? (If investment property losses can be written off?)

Can only be written off against gains from other investment.
Passive losses against passive income. So it all depends where Cody's money comes from.

-t

[turtle777]

So, Cody, that's some sh!tty situation you're in. I feel sorry for you.

Since you got a lot of advice from family and friends, I would get a second opinion from a disinterested third party (lawyer etc). If they hint in the same direction, then go for it.

You were screwed, but unfortunately, you can' really go after them. You need to do what's necessary to regain sanity for yourself and your family.

-t

[♥]

turtle, you're great and I appreciate that post.

I'll be okay. I like the house. I hate the problems.

We'll see what happens. I need to move where there is s p a c e.

[OreoCookie]

I would wait with my advice until you give us real alternatives.
If I were you, I'd think through all the examples. There is no point in deciding to foreclose your home if you this gets you into more trouble than worth it.
(0) How much money in mortgage payments can you really afford each month? Use conservative estimates.
(i) What kind of homes could you afford to buy with that?
(ii) What area would that be (good place for children to live in)?
(iii) Is a move financially sensible?
(iv) What other things can you save money on?
(E. g. an expensive car you don't need, costs of fuel, etc.) Don't save money on your health, though! If you're sick, you can't work.

Lawsuits are pointless if you know that there is no money to get anyway. Plus, lawsuits may take a long time and a lot of effort. And (obviously) a good lawyer.

[Mrjinglesusa]

Originally Posted by ♥ 

Actually, the advice to walk away is coming threefold:

1. Very smart Jewish uncle CPA
2. Very smart lawyer whose specialty is bankruptcy and real estate litigation/foreclosure
3. Very smart mortgage broker (40 years working with the very smart Jewish uncle)

They are the ones suggesting that I roll out of the house and get out now.

If you have received advice from three "very smart" people, all of whom seem to be in a position to best advise you (CPA, lawyer specializing in real estate foreclosure, and a mortgage broker), why are you asking a bunch of random people on a Mac forum what you should do?

I don't see how you are going to get better advice here than from those three people you mentioned. I mean, hell, one's Jewish! <---not really sure how that is relevant but whatever

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by Mrjinglesusa 

If you have received advice from three "very smart" people, all of whom seem to be in a position to best advise you (CPA, lawyer specializing in real estate foreclosure, and a mortgage broker), why are you asking a bunch of random people on a Mac forum what you should do?

Why not ?

There are lawyers, CPAs and real estate pros here in the forums.
And secondly, nothing is more valuable than a second opinion from an uninvolved third party.

Yes, you sometimes have to dig for the nuggets here, and you'll see a lot of crap posted, but it can be worth it.

-t

[Mrjinglesusa]

Originally Posted by turtle777 

Why not ?

There are lawyers, CPAs and real estate pros here in the forums.
And secondly, nothing is more valuable than a second opinion from an uninvolved third party.

Yes, you sometimes have to dig for the nuggets here, and you'll see a lot of crap posted, but it can be worth it.

-t

True.

However, my point is that if I already received advice from a CPA, mortgage broker, and a lawyer specializing in foreclosure, I wouldn't take advice from people here over them.

To each his own though.

[MacosNerd]

Originally Posted by Mrjinglesusa 

However, my point is that if I already received advice from a CPA, mortgage broker, and a lawyer specializing in foreclosure, I wouldn't take advice from people here over them.

Agreed

[design219]

This is a great lesson for potential home buyers/builders.

My wife and I debated heavily about whether to try to self contract or hire a builder to build our house. We decided to self contract, and although it was a hair pulling experience many, many times, I know every single thing in the house is correctly built. After two years of living in the house, it is still performing perfectly.

For us, building a house was a serious financial plunge, and we took the time to learn about what we were doing before we started. That made a tremendous difference. We also invested in an architect, and that money was well worth every penny.

[peeb]

Originally Posted by Mrjinglesusa 

However, my point is that if I already received advice from a CPA, mortgage broker, and a lawyer specializing in foreclosure, I wouldn't take advice from people here over them.

Isn't this one of those self contradictory statements like "Everything I say is a lie, including this statement"? You are advising him not to take your advice. If he doesn't, then he is.

[peeb]

Originally Posted by design219 

This is a great lesson for potential home buyers/builders.

My wife and I debated heavily about whether to try to self contract or hire a builder to build our house. We decided to self contract, and although it was a hair pulling experience many, many times, I know every single thing in the house is correctly built. After two years of living in the house, it is still performing perfectly.

For us, building a house was a serious financial plunge, and we took the time to learn about what we were doing before we started. That made a tremendous difference. We also invested in an architect, and that money was well worth every penny.

Sounds like fun - I've wrestled with pretty massive remodel projects and always thought building a house would be cool, but haven't taken the plunge. Agree on the value of architects though!

[design219]

Originally Posted by peeb 

Sounds like fun

In spite of the headaches, it was fun. I learned how to do a lot of things and amassed a nice collection of good tools as well (we did the floors, trim, etc. ourselves).

[Eug]

Originally Posted by design219 

This is a great lesson for potential home buyers/builders.

My wife and I debated heavily about whether to try to self contract or hire a builder to build our house. We decided to self contract, and although it was a hair pulling experience many, many times, I know every single thing in the house is correctly built. After two years of living in the house, it is still performing perfectly.

For us, building a house was a serious financial plunge, and we took the time to learn about what we were doing before we started. That made a tremendous difference. We also invested in an architect, and that money was well worth every penny.

I know others who went with builders who did everything.

One ran out of money before they started the build. He got his deposit back... 2 years later, without interest.

The other got a great build... for lots of money. The notable point though was one family member was always around to police things as they were going in.

I personally just bought a lived in but recent house, cuz I didn't want to deal with the build process. I went through that with my townhouse condo, and it was a big enough pain as it is, and a much bigger detached home would be several times worse. (I've got some of my own headaches of course with the house, but nothing earth shattering.)

[Timo]

Originally Posted by design219 

This is a great lesson for potential home buyers/builders.

[snip]
we took the time to learn about what we were doing before we started. That made a tremendous difference.

Yes. Buildings are not like retail or consumer goods.

Originally Posted by design219 

We also invested in an architect, and that money was well worth every penny.

though I'm obviously biased, I think this is great advice. Architects bring value to the building process in two distinct ways: first, they interpret needs and design for a specific audience (the client) rather than a general "buyer", as a builder typically does. Second, they safeguard during construction the ideas and designs arrive at with the client -- they make sure that things are built to your specifications, and not however the builder is used to doing it.

[Big Mac]

♥, you seem like a nice person, but you don't appear to be among the more rational portion of the population, and I don't think you should be making weighty financial decisions if you think voluntary foreclosure is a great option.

[finboy]

Originally Posted by peeb 

Really? As bad as this is, why is "responsibility" in scare quotes? You don't think people have a responsibility to pay back money they borrow?

Absolutely they do. But that's also why we have credit scores and all the other certifications that accompany one's credit history. Those are the consequences, and there shouldn't be a stigma attached to not paying ones debts. Just consequences.

[Chuckit]

Originally Posted by finboy 

Absolutely they do. But that's also why we have credit scores and all the other certifications that accompany one's credit history. Those are the consequences, and there shouldn't be a stigma attached to not paying ones debts. Just consequences.

A stigma is a consequence, isn't it?

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by Chuckit 

A stigma is a consequence, isn't it?

I don't get the difference either.

-t

[finboy]

Originally Posted by turtle777 

I don't get the difference either.

-t

Sure. Sorry I got caught up and couldn't express it clearly.

There shouldn't be some vague "responsibility" attached to it -- if you walk away, you pay the cost (in this case, your borrowing ability). It's not "good" or "bad" but it limits your ability to borrow in the future.

[peeb]

Well, I hate to sound like a moral absolutist, but I think that not paying your debts is 'bad', don't you?