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mattyb · Mar 6, 2009, 08:55 AM

A French internet forum whose raison d'être is self-pity has become a hit in France and an American version is unexpectedly taking the United States by storm.

The US version.

shifuimam · Mar 6, 2009, 11:00 AM

Holy hell this is a hilarious read.

Thanks for the link.

SpaceMonkey · Mar 6, 2009, 11:04 AM

Today, my girlfriend dumped me proclaiming she wanted someone more like her "Edward". I asked her who Edward was. She held up a copy her "Twilight" book. She was talking about a fictional vampire. FML

klb5090 · Mar 6, 2009, 11:12 AM

I've been reading this site intermittently for about a week (saw it on vwvortex), there is some hilarious stories.

Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML

Salty · Mar 6, 2009, 03:01 PM

It's like an emo lolcasts

Maflynn · Mar 6, 2009, 03:11 PM

Great site, definitely bookmarking it.

lyanma · Mar 6, 2009, 04:12 PM

I love reading this site.

Railroader · Mar 6, 2009, 08:18 PM

Not a fan of the site.

Laminar · Mar 6, 2009, 11:33 PM

Originally Posted by Railroader

Not a fan of the site.

You just have to be different, don't you.

Laminar · Mar 6, 2009, 11:36 PM

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

brassplayersrock² · Mar 7, 2009, 05:01 AM

today, my daughter asked me when was the first time i had sex. After i told her 22 she quickly shouted, "beat ya!" she's thirteen. Fml

:/ .

Railroader · Mar 7, 2009, 08:48 AM

Originally Posted by Laminar

You just have to be different, don't you.

Don't "have to". Just am.

Laminar · Apr 15, 2009, 10:21 PM

...

Today, a women drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible to do. Now my house is condemned. FML

turtle777 · Apr 15, 2009, 10:40 PM

Today, I babysat 3 year old twins. They have a huge dry erase board hanging inbetween their beds. After they fell asleep I drew a very detailed and large drawing of a penis. When I went to erase it I realized it was in Sharpie. FML

-t

sek929 · Apr 15, 2009, 11:09 PM

Oddly enough, I've seen the dry erase markers actually take sharpie off of a whiteboard, no lie.

shifuimam · Apr 15, 2009, 11:35 PM

Nail polish remover (acetone) works, too.

Brien · Apr 16, 2009, 01:55 AM

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theather. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your ****." I just got told by a six year old. FML

Sounds like the guy off that Role Models movie.

Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML

My personal favorite.

Tiresias · Apr 16, 2009, 07:02 AM

However, gets old pretty quick.

Salty · Apr 16, 2009, 08:56 AM

I love Fmylife... makes me feel better about myself at work.

shifuimam · Apr 16, 2009, 09:46 AM

It seems like a lot of these can't be true. They're just too far-fetched...

ort888 · Apr 16, 2009, 10:48 AM

Today I thought of a somewhat humorous fake story to post on FML and I did but no one seemed to care. FML

SpaceMonkey · Apr 16, 2009, 10:49 AM

Today I participated in the MacNN Political/War Lounge. FML.

brassplayersrock² · Apr 16, 2009, 10:53 AM

^ ditto

turtle777 · Apr 16, 2009, 11:18 AM

Today, I responded to a Besson3 post. FML.

-t

residentEvil · Apr 16, 2009, 12:24 PM

sounds like a Steven Wright routine...or that guy (who died not too long ago) that did the similar stick. had rose tinted glasses and looked down all the time. long "kurt corbaine" type hair. can't think of his name.

Doofy · Apr 16, 2009, 12:34 PM

Originally Posted by residentEvil

sounds like a Steven Wright routine...or that guy (who died not too long ago) that did the similar stick. had rose tinted glasses and looked down all the time. long "kurt corbaine" type hair. can't think of his name.

I have no idea who you're talking about but it all reminds me of Rodney Dangerfield's act. Substitute "FML" for "No respect" and there ya go.

residentEvil · Apr 16, 2009, 12:38 PM

Originally Posted by Doofy

I have no idea who you're talking about but it all reminds me of Rodney Dangerfield's act. Substitute "FML" for "No respect" and there ya go.

yup; him too.

but steven and the other guy were all deadpan. no expression, no voice changes.

Laminar · Apr 16, 2009, 01:34 PM

Mitch Hedberg.

Tiresias · Apr 16, 2009, 10:52 PM

Originally Posted by residentEvil

sounds like a Steven Wright routine...or that guy (who died not too long ago) that did the similar stick. had rose tinted glasses and looked down all the time. long "kurt corbaine" type hair. can't think of his name.

And it's "shtick", not "stick".

residentEvil · Apr 17, 2009, 05:54 AM

Originally Posted by Laminar

Mitch Hedberg.

thanks; that is him!

residentEvil · Apr 17, 2009, 05:56 AM

Originally Posted by toothpick_charlie

And it's "shtick", not "stick".

yup; i know. but since it was a valid word, the spell checker didn't underline it...and thus, didn't notice or care

Rumor · Apr 22, 2009, 03:54 PM

There is an app for this site now and it is free. Let the sad hilarity ensue.

Jawbone54 · Apr 23, 2009, 12:25 AM

I've read from the site quite a few times, but I'm pretty sure most of these are fake. The suspicion makes me feel like the whole thing is worthless (and a lot less funny).

SpaceMonkey · Apr 23, 2009, 03:09 PM

In the same vein:

http://tweetingtoohard.com/

Laminar · Jun 30, 2009, 03:20 PM

How about the alternative version: Heart my Life. I don't think it's being taken too seriously.

I was always the innocent one, the girl next door. I never did drugs, never did anything violent, and never even had sex. Then, I got pregnant! wtf? Everyone called me a slut, but I didn't do anything wrong! Turns out my baby was Jesus! Now I appear on grilled cheese sandwiches. <3ml

Gay marriage just got legalized here in Iowa! No homo: I just own a gay wedding cake shop and times have been rough. <3ml.

My roomate got a webcam and records every ****ing thing that happens in out room. He leaves it on when he leaves to spy on me. Fortunately the webcam is placed so that the only place he cant see me is when im in his bed. Thats where i masturbate. <3ml

Laminar · Jun 30, 2009, 03:22 PM

Walking through best buy, I noticed the wide screen televsions are considered more valuable than the other televisions. I'm asian and view everything in wide screen. <3ml

lawl