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"At first, I was watching him and telling him what to do a little bit," said the Reds' regular batboy, 16-year-old Luke Stowe, son of equipment manager Rick Stowe. "He started recognizing stuff that I did after a couple of years. I was getting pretty scared thinking he was going to take my job."
Luckily, Stowe didn't have to stew too long. Cabrera punched his batboy time clock and left the dugout after the fourth inning, telling Stowe that it was tough work.
"One ticket to Washington, please. I have a date with destiny."
And I thought this would be about a woman complaining that the CIA had come and taken away her gerbils. I’m (paradoxically, perhaps) both highly and deepy disappointed.