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My World Has Been Rocked (Advice Thread)
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Mar 1, 2011, 02:59 PM
 
...in a good way. We're not telling my church/students/Facebook/Twitter until another two weeks, so I had to vent this news somewhere...

My wife and I are going to be bringing a tiny little Jawbone into the world around the middle of October.

I'm not a bit nervous about it (crazy excited), and we're prepared financially, but I wanted to get some advice from the fathers and mothers here on the old 'NN. What can I expect during the pregnancy? Do I need to keep several vital things in mind? Reading suggestions? Anything?
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 02:59 PM
 
It's probably best to raise him agnostic.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:01 PM
 
Congratulations!

Oh and get your sleep now, because once that baby gets here, you won't get any for a while.
(And you likely won't get "any" for a while, also...)
( Last edited by cjrivera; Mar 1, 2011 at 03:19 PM. )
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:10 PM
 
Originally Posted by Jawbone54 View Post
What can I expect during the pregnancy? Do I need to keep several vital things in mind? Reading suggestions? Anything?
Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right.

"One ticket to Washington, please. I have a date with destiny."
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:11 PM
 
Congrats. We recently brought a little ort into the world (ort889) and it's been a wild and amazing ride so far.

Different women have very different pregnancies so it's hard to give advice. My real advice on the pregnancy is to not focus on it, but rather focus on your future life with a baby. My wife and I spent way to much energy worrying about the actual delivery and having a natural childbirth. But the truth is that you're going to be in a hospital surrounded by trained professionals and that baby is going to come out one way or another... and once that's over it will feel like an eternity ago and you will realize that the physical act of giving birth isn't nearly as important in the long run then actually raising a human being.

Our little guy is 18 months old now and keeps getting more fun every day. I've never been much of a "baby person" but I love kids... and watching a tiny thing slowly evolve from a useless pile of meat into a human is pretty amazing.

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Mar 1, 2011, 03:14 PM
 
I watched a document called The Business of Baby making a few weeks ago and would highly suggest you watch it and make a very important choice about a natural birth vs a drug induced birth which is the typical method used by hospitals to meet deadlines and to make baby production predictable. They covered some very interesting topics in there including the stresses to mother and child in typical hospital births. I personally see myself using a midwife and natural birth if I ever have a baby. This is something you and your wife should research and discuss now.

As a father I would recommend you do everything you ever could to keep stress down for your wife. If you typically get into heated arguments once in a while for typical things everyone does. Commit to backing off. Wife is always right until that baby is born.

Would also recommend at least during pregnancy and during breast feeding that your wife at least go fully organic foods and stay away from HFCS foods.
I mean none of that stuff hurts to give your baby the best possible start in life.

Oh and congrats!
Blandine Bureau 1940 - 2011
Missed 2012 by 3 days, RIP Grandma :-(
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:14 PM
 
Useless Pile of Meat would make a great baby tee.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:21 PM
 
Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
It's probably best to raise him agnostic.
I would commence with laying of PS3 and Xbox controllers on the wife in equal durations sometime during the second trimester.

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Mar 1, 2011, 03:21 PM
 
Congrats! Get your wife some preggie pops and enjoy your time alone together for the last few months.

I liked the Sears Baby/Pregnancy books, they are very pro-attached parenting but are also very practical, detailed, and not pushy. In fact, I have a bunch of books in my basement I was going to Craigslist, you want?
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:22 PM
 
Originally Posted by SpaceMonkey View Post
I would commence with laying of PS3 and Xbox controllers on the wife in equal durations sometime during the second trimester.
Press her belly button for two seconds, then make the XBOX start-up sound occur.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:28 PM
 
congratulations!

only a few things that are truly important in life; this is one of them.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:30 PM
 
Originally Posted by Sealobo View Post
congratulations!

only a few things that are truly important in life; this is one of them.
The other: [WAS REMOVED]

Edit: Seriously, what the hell guys?
( Last edited by The Final Dakar; Mar 2, 2011 at 10:35 AM. Reason: Puppies are nice!)
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:33 PM
 
Pay attention. Your kid knows, your wife knows, and you know.

You just have to listen.

(harder than it sounds if you're generally more about control than about flow.)
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:37 PM
 
Also, this is the single most awesome piece of news you are ever going to hear in your entire life.

Congratulations.

(my daughter is four and went to kindergarten dressed up as a horse today. I did her makeup.)
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:44 PM
 
Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
It's probably best to raise him agnostic.
Ha...

Originally Posted by cjrivera View Post
Congratulations!

Oh and get your sleep now, because once that baby gets here, you won't get any for a while.
(And you likely won't get "any" for a while, also...)
Thanks!

I've just recently started going to bed before 1:00 AM on a fairly consistent basis. I guess I can kiss that goodbye.

Originally Posted by SpaceMonkey View Post
Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right. Your wife is always right.
That's what I was afraid of.

Originally Posted by ort888 View Post
Congrats. We recently brought a little ort into the world (ort889) and it's been a wild and amazing ride so far.

Different women have very different pregnancies so it's hard to give advice. My real advice on the pregnancy is to not focus on it, but rather focus on your future life with a baby. My wife and I spent way to much energy worrying about the actual delivery and having a natural childbirth. But the truth is that you're going to be in a hospital surrounded by trained professionals and that baby is going to come out one way or another... and once that's over it will feel like an eternity ago and you will realize that the physical act of giving birth isn't nearly as important in the long run then actually raising a human being.
Sounds like great advice. Since this is my first time around the block, it's stuff like this that I need to hear.

Our little guy is 18 months old now and keeps getting more fun every day. I've never been much of a "baby person" but I love kids... and watching a tiny thing slowly evolve from a useless pile of meat into a human is pretty amazing.
I had to read that last sentence several times just to appreciate it fully. That 18-month-old stage is the time that I always thought was the most fun with my nephews. It's got to be an exhausting blast to have that around non-stop.

Originally Posted by Athens View Post
I watched a document called The Business of Baby making a few weeks ago and would highly suggest you watch it and make a very important choice about a natural birth vs a drug induced birth which is the typical method used by hospitals to meet deadlines and to make baby production predictable. They covered some very interesting topics in there including the stresses to mother and child in typical hospital births. I personally see myself using a midwife and natural birth if I ever have a baby. This is something you and your wife should research and discuss now.
It's funny that you mention that. It's been in our Netflix Instant Queue for months, and I've been meaning to watch it at night when we're both in bed. I'll definitely take a look.

As a father I would recommend you do everything you ever could to keep stress down for your wife. If you typically get into heated arguments once in a while for typical things everyone does. Commit to backing off. Wife is always right until that baby is born.

Would also recommend at least during pregnancy and during breast feeding that your wife at least go fully organic foods and stay away from HFCS foods.
I mean none of that stuff hurts to give your baby the best possible start in life.
Definitely will be trying to help with stress levels. I will, however, have to learn to let some things go. We're already making preparations for the all-organic diet, or as much as we can. It's not as easy here in the South to accomplish that, unless you live in a large city like Dallas.

Oh and congrats!
Thank ya!

Originally Posted by SpaceMonkey View Post
I would commence with laying of PS3 and Xbox controllers on the wife in equal durations sometime during the second trimester.
Or the Wii remote...or the PS3 controller...or the 360 controller...or the PS3 controller...

Originally Posted by andi*pandi View Post
Congrats! Get your wife some preggie pops and enjoy your time alone together for the last few months.

I liked the Sears Baby/Pregnancy books, they are very pro-attached parenting but are also very practical, detailed, and not pushy. In fact, I have a bunch of books in my basement I was going to Craigslist, you want?
That's awesome of you to offer. How many are we talking about here? I'd like to hear what you have, and would Paypal you whatever you're selling them for and shipping.

Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
Press her belly button for two seconds, then make the XBOX start-up sound occur.
We've barely known, and I'm already getting on her nerves with the Look Who's Talking act. Right now the baby sounds very muffled and high-pitched.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:47 PM
 
Originally Posted by Sealobo View Post
congratulations!

only a few things that are truly important in life; this is one of them.
Thanks much! I'm still not sure the reality has sunk in.

Originally Posted by Spheric Harlot View Post
Also, this is the single most awesome piece of news you are ever going to hear in your entire life.

Congratulations.

(my daughter is four and went to kindergarten dressed up as a horse today. I did her makeup.)
Thank you.

See, people tell me stories like that, and I can't wait. Hoping desperately for a daughter, too. Was she in a play or something?

I've been ready for this for a long while. My wife just became ready last November. When we were engaged, we agreed on five years of marriage child-free, then family time.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:51 PM
 
Babies are exciting. My niece just announced she is having another, and yay, I get to hold another baby. My youngest is 3 and today I found a baby pic of her, it's like a different creature.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 03:57 PM
 
It was netflix I watched it on

Oh and avoid anything made in china, and plastics when possible. Buy American, Canadian, European made stuff. Just to many recalls have come out of china from dangerous chemicals on toys and clothing. Whats worse is it keeps happening. This is more for after birth I guess.
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Mar 1, 2011, 04:15 PM
 
Congrats on the good news!
My only piece of advice is to NOT find out the sex of the child before its born. Let it be a surprise. It will be, without any reservation, the biggest surprise you will ever experience in your lives. Seriously.

My wife and I gave her doctor strict instructions to not reveal the gender to us with both our kids. We have never regretted it.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 04:30 PM
 
Prepare yourself for a lot of yellow and green gifts if you go this route.

My wife and I did the same thing, but we decided to wait until our child was 4 to find out the gender. We change our little one in the dark wearing thick gloves so as to not ruin the surprise.

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Mar 1, 2011, 04:31 PM
 
More good advice: Hide a few pizzas in the deep freezer for future apple press conferences. You'll need them.

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Mar 1, 2011, 04:32 PM
 
Jesus, you're on a roll today.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 04:47 PM
 
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Mar 1, 2011, 04:57 PM
 
Congratulations! That's fantastic news!

I have no advice, but I'm going to stay tuned to this thread to see what everyone says. I'm hoping to brew up a little Larry, Jr. soon. {fingers crossed}
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 06:14 PM
 
Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
Press her belly button for two seconds, then make the XBOX start-up sound occur.
Just watch out for the Red Rin....nevermind.too far?

Congrats! My sister had her first last October and it's been a blast watching him grow.

     
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Mar 1, 2011, 08:06 PM
 
Prepare yourself, she'll be unreasonably horny before long.

Congrats, man.
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Mar 1, 2011, 09:07 PM
 
Many congratulations. Awesome news.

We've got a nine month old boy at home, here are my 2 cents as a new dad:

1. Your life will change. No matter how prepared you think you are, you're not.
2. Whatever is important to you now, won't be.
3. While there's massive change ahead, it's awesome change.
4. Sometimes that's hard to believe. Like at 3:00 in the morning when you've got a busy day ahead and the little ****er just won't sleep.
5. Then they'll smile at you and nothing else matters.
6. If you can't cook, now would be a good time to learn the basics. You wife will be busy.
7. If you don't do the laundry, now would be a good time to start. Your wife will be busy.
8. If you don't clean....you get my drift. Your wife will be at the beck and call of the baby for the first three months. She'll be feeding ten to twenty times a day. Do everything you can to support her.
9. Real men cuddle babies. The more body contact a baby has, the more secure it will be later in life.
10. Pregnancy boobs are awesome. Also, many girls report a serious increase in libido during the first trimester. Enjoy.

Seriously, becoming a dad is the most wonderful and scary thing I've ever done. Just relax into it.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 09:11 PM
 
11. Find a Good Will, or similar, shop in a posh neighborhood. We buy Baby Gap (etc) outfits at a nearby store for $3 a pop - bought for $30, worn for a couple of weeks and donated when little Tristan outgrew it.
     
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Mar 1, 2011, 09:41 PM
 
Congratulations! I'm not a father (yet) so I don't have any advice to share.
I did fall into the role of family photographer so if I had to make a recommendation it would be to take lots of pictures.
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Mar 1, 2011, 10:14 PM
 
That is so awesome. Huge congratulations. Make sure you introduce her or him to the 'NN at an appropriate age
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 12:32 AM
 
Originally Posted by SSharon View Post
Congratulations! I'm not a father (yet) so I don't have any advice to share.
I did fall into the role of family photographer so if I had to make a recommendation it would be to take lots of pictures.
Yeah, Jawbone just needs to find a worthwhile photographer now.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 12:53 AM
 
Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
Yeah, Jawbone just needs to find a worthwhile photographer now.
Luckily he will not have to look far.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 01:02 AM
 
Jawbone's wife is a photographer?

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Mar 2, 2011, 01:11 AM
 
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 01:16 AM
 
Sigh.

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Mar 2, 2011, 01:17 AM
 
facepalm.jpg
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 01:27 AM
 
No advice, only congrats. Yay!
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Mar 2, 2011, 01:55 AM
 
^ hey, which of you clowns hijacked Doofy's account?
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 04:45 AM
 
Congrats. Like everyone has said, life changing. Advice?

1) Buy lots of cheap hand towels. They go over shoulders on laps etc. Milky vomit stains are hard to get out of clothes.
2) Spend the money on a decent push chair. I'd go for something like this. The big wheels help.
3) Your car is too small. Get something that can hold loads more shite that you think you need. If you get a station wagon, buy a net to ensure the stuff in the back of the station wagon doesn't bang the kid's head when you break violently. Trust me.
4) Buy at least four baby bottles. The last thing you want to be doing at stupid o'clock in the morning is washing a baby bottle.
5) The steriliser that you put in the microwave is great.
6) Prepare for back-ache.
7) Dummies (pacifiers) are great. Fcuk those who think otherwise.
8) Learn to play computer games with one hand. You'll be rocking the baby with the other.

Can't think of anything else for the moment. Good luck.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 08:10 AM
 
Make sure you're teaching at a private school by the time the kid turns 5 so he doesn't have to suffer the tragedy of a public education.

That's the best advice you will ever get.

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Mar 2, 2011, 08:20 AM
 
Originally Posted by mattyb View Post
4) Buy at least four baby bottles. The last thing you want to be doing at stupid o'clock in the morning is washing a baby bottle.
Heh.

Ours *hated* the bottle, so no chance for that.

Originally Posted by mattyb View Post
7) Dummies (pacifiers) are great. Fcuk those who think otherwise.
I won't have you speak like that of my daughter.

Her attitude was "**** pacifiers" until she was old enough not to need one and thought they were cool, cuz she saw the babies in her daycare using them.

Otherwise,
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 09:42 AM
 
Congrats! All the advice in this thread has been excellent, so all I only have this to add:

Enjoy this time! Even if you have more kids, your wife will only be pregnant for the first time once!
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 09:43 AM
 
Sorry, I meant for the parents who hate dummies. My daughter (7) gave up her dummy when she didn't nap any more. My son (3.5) still naps and I find it a great way to calm him for that pre-evening meal time.

Vodka is good as well but the grandparents didn't like the idea.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 09:55 AM
 
Originally Posted by mattyb View Post
1) Buy lots of cheap hand towels. They go over shoulders on laps etc. Milky vomit stains are hard to get out of clothes.
Cloth diapers are excellent for spit cloths. More layers and absorbency.

Have a pacifier in case. My first was inconsolable without it, my second spit them out.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 10:31 AM
 
Originally Posted by mattyb View Post
Sorry, I meant for the parents who hate dummies.
I know. Sorry, I keep forgetting that dry humor translates badly on the Internet.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 10:34 AM
 
Feel free to blame him, he misses jokes quite often.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 10:36 AM
 
Oh I see one of my posts got edited.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 10:54 AM
 
I didn't do it.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 10:55 AM
 
I think rules here are pretty clear, Andi. Whoever denied it supplied it.

Edit: Interestingly, the same axiom applies to paternity tests.
     
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Mar 2, 2011, 11:30 AM
 
Originally Posted by Thorzdad View Post
Congrats on the good news!
My only piece of advice is to NOT find out the sex of the child before its born. Let it be a surprise. It will be, without any reservation, the biggest surprise you will ever experience in your lives. Seriously.

My wife and I gave her doctor strict instructions to not reveal the gender to us with both our kids. We have never regretted it.
Thank ya! Ohhhhh, I'm afraid we're definitely going to be finding out the sex. My wife is a major planner, and we're going to have that room ready. Also, I don't think I could wait.

Originally Posted by besson3c View Post
Do not buy a samurai sword
Too late.

In our family, it's involved in an ancient Jewish ceremony.

Originally Posted by MrsLarry View Post
Congratulations! That's fantastic news!

I have no advice, but I'm going to stay tuned to this thread to see what everyone says. I'm hoping to brew up a little Larry, Jr. soon. {fingers crossed}
Thank ya! Go for it!

Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
Just watch out for the Red Rin....nevermind.too far?

Congrats! My sister had her first last October and it's been a blast watching him grow.

Beautiful picture! He has awesome eyes. Gonna knock the ladies dead.

Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
Prepare yourself, she'll be unreasonably horny before long.

Congrats, man.


Thank ya!

Originally Posted by Phileas View Post
Many congratulations. Awesome news.
Thank you!

We've got a nine month old boy at home, here are my 2 cents as a new dad:

1. Your life will change. No matter how prepared you think you are, you're not.
2. Whatever is important to you now, won't be.
3. While there's massive change ahead, it's awesome change.
4. Sometimes that's hard to believe. Like at 3:00 in the morning when you've got a busy day ahead and the little ****er just won't sleep.
5. Then they'll smile at you and nothing else matters.
6. If you can't cook, now would be a good time to learn the basics. You wife will be busy.
7. If you don't do the laundry, now would be a good time to start. Your wife will be busy.
8. If you don't clean....you get my drift. Your wife will be at the beck and call of the baby for the first three months. She'll be feeding ten to twenty times a day. Do everything you can to support her.
9. Real men cuddle babies. The more body contact a baby has, the more secure it will be later in life.
10. Pregnancy boobs are awesome. Also, many girls report a serious increase in libido during the first trimester. Enjoy.

Seriously, becoming a dad is the most wonderful and scary thing I've ever done. Just relax into it.
1-3. I definitely believe you.
4. A lifetime of insomnia has partially prepared me for this.
5.
6. Definitely on the road to becoming a decent cook. This is Louisiana, after all.
7. Done for many years. No worries here.
8. I get the drift.
9. Oh, I'm a cuddler. No doubt.
10. [MrBURNS]Eeeeexcellent...[/MrBURNS]

Originally Posted by imitchellg5 View Post
That is so awesome. Huge congratulations. Make sure you introduce her or him to the 'NN at an appropriate age
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