 |
 |
Sex Machine - help!
|
|
|
|
|
Professional Poster
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Between Sydney and Melbourne
Status:
Offline
|
|
I have an old breast milk pump, a blood centrifuge and 250g of sunflower margarine.
With the aid of 2 DD batteries would it be possible to covert these three objects into a working sex machine.
Serious answers only please, my wife is only away for a week.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Great White North
Status:
Offline
|
|
for go the DD batteries and rig it to operate on 240volt wall sockets. More sexual kick (Zap)
PS - IBL
|
|
Brian says (9:16 AM): I was looking at houses in Ottawa... I actually have a temptation in me to move
Jeff ******* says (9:19 AM): Eww, Ottawa is gross. It's infested with politicians, and presently, 1 Harper as well.
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Clinically Insane
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: 888500128, C3, 2nd soft.
Status:
Offline
|
|
If the breast milk pump is giving you ideas, I guess it must be true what they say about Asian men.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Senior User
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: U.K.
Status:
Offline
|
|
|
|
|
iMac Intel Core i5, 2.5GHz, 4GB RAM, 500GB 21.5" Monitor 10.7.4.
iMac 17" 2.0ghz Intel Core 2 Duo w 3gb memory (White one) 10.6.8.
Internal 500gb / 160gb plus External 500gb x 2 (2x Time Machine)
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Professional Poster
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Hong Kong
Status:
Offline
|
|
is the desired sex machine for yourself or the wife?
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Professional Poster
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Hamburg
Status:
Offline
|
|
My problem is the 250g of sunflower margarine...!?!
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Clinically Insane
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: 888500128, C3, 2nd soft.
Status:
Offline
|
|
Yeah, I would've expected rapeseed oil.
*badum KSCH*
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Chicago, Bang! Bang!
Status:
Offline
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Chicago, Bang! Bang!
Status:
Offline
|
|
Originally Posted by moonmonkey 
I have an old breast milk pump, a blood centrifuge and 250g of sunflower margarine.
With the aid of 2 DD batteries would it be possible to covert these three objects into a working sex machine.
Serious answers only please, my wife is only away for a week.
Sorry. I'll be serious.
Put the margarine on some waffles, sell the centrifuge, get a hooker.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mac Elite
Join Date: Apr 2001
Status:
Offline
|
|
wow macnn really has died
|
|
"Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master." -George Washington
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Washington, DC
Status:
Offline
|
|
Originally Posted by el chupacabra
wow macnn really has died
a/s/l?
|
"One ticket to Washington, please. I have a date with destiny."
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Iowa
Status:
Offline
|
|
|
|
"Specific knowledge on a topic usually demonstrates in-depth knowledge."
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Professional Poster
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Status:
Offline
|
|
Originally Posted by moonmonkey
I have an old breast milk pump, a blood centrifuge and 250g of sunflower margarine.
With the aid of 2 DD batteries would it be possible to covert these three objects into a working sex machine.
Serious answers only please, my wife is only away for a week.
What the heck do you need hardware for? Don't you have two perfectly good hands?!? 
|
|
Mac Pro Dual 3.0 Dual-Core
MacBook Pro
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Washington, DC
Status:
Offline
|
|
Ditch the batteries and go solar. Carbon credits, baby!
|
"One ticket to Washington, please. I have a date with destiny."
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Administrator  Join Date: May 2000
Location: California
Status:
Offline
|
|
Set up the centrifuge somewhere passers-by can see. Leave it running. Pose the pump on top of a glass jar, also visible. Put the yellow margarine in, along with some gravel and small rocks. Let them assume you are concentrating Uranium. Post some suitable political slogans while you're at it.
Not sure about the sex part, but it will bring excitement into your life. People with guns will come by to talk to you. I expect your wife will be surprised.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Chicago, Bang! Bang!
Status:
Offline
|
|
Originally Posted by Laminar
If you put "Rip Your Dick Off" in the title, you have to grab me in the first 10 seconds.
This did not succeed.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Iowa
Status:
Offline
|
|
Sorry, stuff starts happening at around :15, the joke starts at :20.
|
"Specific knowledge on a topic usually demonstrates in-depth knowledge."
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Chicago, Bang! Bang!
Status:
Offline
|
|
I still maintain "let's make 'em wait for dicks to be ripped off" is a flawed comedy model.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: California
Status:
Offline
|
|
Originally Posted by subego
If you put "Rip Your Dick Off" in the title, you have to grab me in the first 10 seconds.
This did not succeed.
In context to the thread, this is the funniest unintentional joke of this thread yet.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 
|
|
|
Forum Rules
|
|
|
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
|
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top
