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View Poll Results: Were You Spanked Growing Up?
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Yes 39 votes (82.98%)
No 8 votes (17.02%)
Voters: 47. You may not vote on this poll
Were You Spanked? (Page 2)
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subego  (op)
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Sep 18, 2011, 08:16 PM
 
My dad went to Catholic school and has some harrowing stories.

The Brother who taught algebra was actually the PE teacher. He would teach algebra wrong and then beat the shit out of you for doing badly on the test. When I mentioned the possibilty of telling your parents about it, he said "oh no... if you did that your parents would smack you, because they assumed you did something to deserve it."

This same Brother once roundhoused a kid so hard his jaw shattered. The punishment was a transfer.
     
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Sep 18, 2011, 08:45 PM
 
Originally Posted by OAW View Post
When I was coming up the African-American community used different terms for specific types of corporal punishment:

A. If your punishment was meted out with a hand across your behind then we'd say you got a spanking.

B. If it was delivered with an object such as a belt, switch, paddle, or extension cord anywhere below the waist then we'd say you got a whupping. If you did something really bad you might catch this coming out of the bath tub still dripping wet. Much worse than fully clothed. Ouch!

C. If you caught a quick slap across the face or mouth for talking back or being disrespectful we'd say you got popped.

D. If you received B but above the waist, or were struck with a closed fist, or were in any way bloodied or bruised then we'd say you got a beating.

My mother was the primary disciplinarian when I was growing up. My father only got involved for the most egregious of offenses. And that was something you definitely did not want. As a very young child I'd get spanked when warranted. As an older child I'd get whupped on occasion ... but not very often because by then just knowing that such punishment was on the table was generally enough to keep me in line. By the time I was a teenager I no longer received any corporal punishment. I do recall getting popped once when I got particularly out of line ... but that's the only exception I remember. This was mainly because by then I'd developed "parent management skills" and I'd figured out that staying out of trouble and doing what I was supposed to do was the #1 way to get to do what I wanted to do. But also because 1) I was much taller than my mother by then, and 2) if a parent hasn't gotten their child in check by the time they are a teenager it's way too late to try to do it anyway ... especially by getting physical. Most in the African-American community then (and perhaps even now) only considered a beating to be "child abuse". And it was most definitely something that would get you ostracized if you went there.

OAW
Your best work!

I was one of 5 kids, 4 boys. Each of the above applied exactly as you describe, although in our household it was;
A. a "swat across the backside", but I can attest that it was more "onto" or "in through" than ever across.

B. a whupping and I'd like to add hotwheels tracks to the list of implements if you please. My dad was the very formal type. He'd send you to his room with the directive to pull your pants down and 30 minutes or so later he'd arrive, open his closet, carefully select just the perfect belt, and commence with 5-10 lashings evenly distributed across both cheeks... he had very good form after all. To be clear, I experienced this only twice that I recall as after the first few of A, B was less necessary, and eventually required only "the look of doom". My mom on the other hand was not nearly as coordinated and while she may have had every intention of catching us on the fat, it didn't quite work out that way and we all knew it wouldn't. She was reactive to negative stimuli in a swift, dangerous way. She'd rip into our hotwheels setup like Godzilla and before we knew it we were in danger. Thankfully, our upstairs bathroom was connected to the hallway through their master bedroom which proved good exercise for all of us, but required superior clock management. This scenario happened twice that I recall, but then... I was the youngest. She was otherwise the most nurturing, loving, gracious woman in the universe. Jekyll and Hide is how I'd describe it and oh... we had it coming.

C was required once by my father but fell somewhere between C and D in that multiple Cs were used in succession. No blood or bruising that I recall. It was kind of like; WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!?! "well... I... uh..." *pop. "Um, I... I" *pop, "sniffle" *pop, but that was for drinking with friends in the house while he was out of town, rifling through his closet, and shooting bb guns out back at cans, bottles, and apparently the garage light. Once my eldest brother returned C. Think Mayweather v Ortiz. *Actually, it was one shot to my dad, chase ensued until my father probably figured there was no perfect way to dispose of the body and eventually left the house to cool down.
ebuddy
     
subego  (op)
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Sep 18, 2011, 09:23 PM
 
Did you actually stop doing those things, or just learn to cover your tracks better?

I've never met a kid who you could get to stop drinking or to stop rolling the house when unsupervised.

Similarly, if a kid has a BB gun, a likely outcome is stuff getting shot with it.
     
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Sep 18, 2011, 11:26 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
Did you actually stop doing those things, or just learn to cover your tracks better?
Both while much more discriminating of the circumstances that lead to the infraction. If this had always been their reaction, I suspect it wouldn't have been as effective.

I've never met a kid who you could get to stop drinking or to stop rolling the house when unsupervised.

Similarly, if a kid has a BB gun, a likely outcome is stuff getting shot with it.
Yes, but what is likely most bothersome to the parent is not the mere act of disobedience, but the patent stupidity evidenced by the scene in question.
ebuddy
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:28 AM
 
One of the few bad memories I have of my childhood is being spanked. I don't know why I was, but I just remember the terror and horror that lead up to it, the pain involved and being in horror of my parents afterwards. It may have gotten me to never repeat whatever action I had undertaken, but I don't think it was worth the long-term psychological effects. I am sure not every kid remembers it this way and I am also sure that many kids would say something like "it set me right", but for me it was absolute torture and horror. I even recall one time locking myself in the bathroom out of fear that my father was going to hit me. I only came out after he promised not to. Mind you, these events were rare. I can only remember one or two of them, but they were enough to inflict long-term damage. Not sure I would ever want to do that to my kids.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:34 AM
 
Originally Posted by Spheric Harlot View Post
No, it doesn't, you moron. I have ZERO respect for you. I leave you alone because you're stupid enough to cause me bodily harm if I try to interact on a normal level with you.

Fear ≠ Respect.
Sounds fairly reasonable. If respect isn't possible, I'll take fear.
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:41 AM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
Did you actually stop doing those things, or just learn to cover your tracks better?

I've never met a kid who you could get to stop drinking or to stop rolling the house when unsupervised.

Similarly, if a kid has a BB gun, a likely outcome is stuff getting shot with it.
My nephew never played ball in my house or sassed my wife ever again, so it worked pretty well.
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
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Sep 19, 2011, 03:04 AM
 
Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
Sounds fairly reasonable. If respect isn't possible, I'll take fear.
Worked for Stalin.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 03:14 AM
 
Originally Posted by Spheric Harlot View Post
Worked for Stalin.
If you're so stupid that fear is the only thing that will motivate you, then that's your fault.
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Sep 19, 2011, 04:50 AM
 
Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
If you're so stupid that fear is the only thing that will motivate you, then that's your fault.
Perfect attitude for bringing a kid into the world.

(no actually, you're damn close, just missing a single connection:

If you're so stupid that fear is the only thing that will motivate you, then that's your parents' fault.

And that is why corporal punishment is either abuse, or unnecessary at best, and illegal in a number of civilized countries.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 06:07 AM
 
Originally Posted by Spheric Harlot View Post
Perfect attitude for bringing a kid into the world.
I wasn't talking about kids, I was talking about adults. Out and about in the real world, I don't care if most people respect me, just as long as they mind their owned damned business and leave me in peace. I don't use fear with children and I love hanging out with them, it's typically adults who are s***heads.

Corporal punishment isn't abuse, when performed carefully and judiciously. If you believe it is, then it's obvious you've never been around kids who actually have been abused. Spanking != beating.
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
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Sep 19, 2011, 06:37 AM
 
You've already made my point.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:16 AM
 
This thread needs more chest pounding.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:42 AM
 
I wonder if any of the horrible tyrants of history were spanked.

"The natural progress of things is for liberty to yield and government to gain ground." TJ
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 10:07 AM
 
Well, if there's some things to take away from this totally non-scientific poll, for me its this:

1. Corporal punishment is not dead, at least not as dead as was implied the past 20 years.
2. Those who received corporal punishment are (subjectively) no better people than those that didn't (based on their NN personalities).
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 10:12 AM
 
Originally Posted by Jawbone54 View Post
By the time I really deserved to be beaten nearly to death, I was already 15 or 16, and my last spanking only served to make me incredibly angry. My parents should've taken a cat of nine tails to me from 15-18.
Do you think that would have made you a better person somehow?

Also, I'm offended because I'm pretty sure that was around the time you were hanging around with all those dirty atheists.

Originally Posted by Jawbone54 View Post
Every child is different, I suppose. Some react positively to (properly administered) corporal punishment, while others seem to actually be fueled by it.
This strikes me an important point. There seems to be segment of the population fixated on a "One size fits all" concept when it comes to discipline (or any other matter, really).
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 12:00 PM
 
Originally Posted by Spheric Harlot View Post
You've already made my point.
That you don't understand spanking? That your head has too many flat spots? That your self-righteousness extends to everyone? You're gonna have to help us out here.
"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
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subego  (op)
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Sep 19, 2011, 01:20 PM
 
Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
My nephew never played ball in my house or sassed my wife ever again, so it worked pretty well.
False analogy. Wildly different contexts.

Since you brought it up though, I don't think it's my place to spank someone else's kid, even if they're family. If you raise a kid who thinks trashing the house and sassing my wife is acceptable, I'm not wasting my time babysitting your problem. Once he leaves, he's not coming back. That's the punishment.

I'll note that would also work pretty well.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 01:43 PM
 
Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
This strikes me an important point. There seems to be segment of the population fixated on a "One size fits all" concept when it comes to discipline (or any other matter, really).
I don't think it's as simple as "one size fits all", but I think "it works for some but not others" is equally simplistic.

Why does it work for some and not others? Wouldn't a great deal of this be based on parenting? If so, the "works for some and not others" argument is circular.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 01:49 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
Why does it work for some and not others? Wouldn't a great deal of this be based on parenting? If so, the "works for some and not others" argument is circular.
The same reason all people don't learn [best] through same types of teaching techniques. After all, isn't discipline a form of instruction?
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:35 PM
 
Originally Posted by hart View Post
Assuming that spanking is the solution to this kind of behavior is simply illogical. That kind of parenting (the same thing occurs in dog owners) is a problem unto itself that isn't related to spanking or not spanking. I regard spanking with a certain horror and decided it was simply not an option with my kids. But they knew I meant it when I said stop something. The "now Timmy, Mommy isn't going to be happy if you don't stop that" said in a saccharine voice with no power behind it is INTENSELY annoying because it's obvious to all including the child that the parent has no intention of actually making it happen. But saying that the alternative is spanking is simplistic and looks on parenting as having two possible options.
The issue in that situation was that the kid was out-of-control ... and the mother totally failed to assert herself as the parent. Additionally, I never said the only alternative was spanking. She could have put him in his seat, strapped him up, and literally held him there. The kid was only 20-30 lbs so it wouldn't have been that difficult. The fundamental issue though was that she had not instilled in him any appreciation that there would in fact be consequences for his bad behavior. The kid knew her instructions to him were optional ... because she wasn't going to do anything if he didn't obey.

Originally Posted by hart View Post
I say this now with 3 older kids (11,13 and 16) who are clearly polite and obedient without being drones in spite of (or because of) a lack of spanking. I've always thought of discipline as basically using the Force (nerd mama). It's all about your mind power guiding their mind power into an appropriate path. Which sounds a little vague I know but whatever punishment or consequence I ever used it was the force behind it that made it functional, not the actual act of punishment.
Spanking is merely one tool in the toolbox. With some kids it's necessary whereas with others it's unnecessary. I have one child that's naturally very compliant. And another who used to push the envelope a bit more. Different kids have different personalities. It's been my experience that corporal punishment is often unneeded when a stern word or look will do. My own children have heard me say "I'm only going to tell you this once. If I have to tell you again it won't be verbally. And you certainly won't appreciate the conversation." But stern words or "the look" works because they know in no uncertain terms that it's not an empty threat.

Originally Posted by hart View Post
On the other hand that plane scenario is every parent's nightmare. Would you have been all happy if the mom had actually spanked the kid and then he started screaming and crying for 45 minutes? No, probably not.
Actually that would have been much more preferable. The kid was already yelling "NO!" to his mother when she was asking him to stay in his seat. If he had started screaming then fine ... whatever. Kids that age aren't going to always be quiet. That's a given. At least we would have been making progress from point A to point B and not just sitting on the tarmac.

Originally Posted by hart View Post
Toddler+plane=no win situation unfortunately. There are just developmental issues in the way that make it impossible for a toddler to behave appropriately in this kind of situation. "Threaten him to within an inch of his life if he got up again" is not a functional action with a toddler.
I trust you realize this was not meant literally? The point is that people need to stop trying to be a kid's friend and be the parent. The parent is in charge. Period. And the kid's obedience is not a topic for discussion. If you need to put that kid on your lap and physically hold him there then do it. If you need to put him in his seat and hold him down with your hands across his legs then do it. If you need to swat him across his behind to get his attention so he can focus on your instructions then do it.

OAW
( Last edited by OAW; Sep 19, 2011 at 03:51 PM. )
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:44 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
I guess it's obvious, but I would presume this is why spanking is so seductive. "Do this action, receive pain" is understandable on an abstract level even by a four-year-old.
Indeed. That's the entire point. You can't reason with a four year old. But a typical four year old will learn rather quickly that "disobedience = pain". As they grow and mature they will learn the reasons why you tell them to do this or not to do that. But in the meantime ...

OAW
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:44 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
False analogy. Wildly different contexts.

Since you brought it up though, I don't think it's my place to spank someone else's kid, even if they're family. If you raise a kid who thinks trashing the house and sassing my wife is acceptable, I'm not wasting my time babysitting your problem. Once he leaves, he's not coming back. That's the punishment.

I'll note that would also work pretty well.
Umm, my sister told me to spank him if he misbehaved badly and wouldn't listen. He's usually a great kid, he was just a little obnoxious that day. Since then he's been a gentleman in our home.
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Sep 19, 2011, 02:50 PM
 
The real issue is leaving parents alone to do parenting the way they want to. If you don't like spanking kids, don't spank your kids. But don't tell others they cant either. If you don't like the Animals at the zoo then don't go to the zoo. Don't try to have it closed down so no one can enjoy it. If you don't like drugs, don't do drugs. And so on and so on.

Spanking has been a parenting method for thousands of years. All of a sudden in the last 30 years its become this evil thing because some idiots think it is.

Some one pointed out above that a lot of people in Jail also got beat a lot. They look at it as the beatings caused the problems that lead them to jail. Well what if the problems caused the beatings. The beatings where attempts to control out of control kids. Being in jail kinda confirms they are still out of control today as adults too. I think it goes hand in hand that they are uncontrollable people from the start so the link between spankings and jail is just because parents of those kids tried all means to control them. The reason you don't see kids who didn't need to be spanked in jail as adults because they where controllable. Just a thought.
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Sep 19, 2011, 03:36 PM
 
Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
B. a whupping and I'd like to add hotwheels tracks to the list of implements if you please.
Oh snap! I totally forgot about that!

When coming up in the 70s the dichotomy of getting a new Hot Wheels set was that A) you'd be the coolest kid on the block (until one of your friends got a newer one), and B) those orange tracks could be uh "re-purposed" at any moment to tax that a*s!

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
My dad was the very formal type. He'd send you to his room with the directive to pull your pants down and 30 minutes or so later he'd arrive, open his closet, carefully select just the perfect belt, and commence with 5-10 lashings evenly distributed across both cheeks... he had very good form after all.
Wasn't that the worst? The anticipation of the whupping was usually way worse than the whupping itself! I'd much rather just get it over with.

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
To be clear, I experienced this only twice that I recall as after the first few of A, B was less necessary, and eventually required only "the look of doom".
Exactly!

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
My mom on the other hand was not nearly as coordinated and while she may have had every intention of catching us on the fat, it didn't quite work out that way and we all knew it wouldn't. She was reactive to negative stimuli in a swift, dangerous way. She'd rip into our hotwheels setup like Godzilla and before we knew it we were in danger. Thankfully, our upstairs bathroom was connected to the hallway through their master bedroom which proved good exercise for all of us, but required superior clock management. This scenario happened twice that I recall, but then... I was the youngest. She was otherwise the most nurturing, loving, gracious woman in the universe. Jekyll and Hide is how I'd describe it and oh... we had it coming.
Oh snap are you saying you were a runner? If so we have something else in common my friend. Even though I knew that would only make the whupping worse ... I instinctively would dash to the other side of a table or even out the front door if I knew it was coming. Eventually my mom learned to just grab my arm and get it over with. All that "I'm gonna whup your a*s. Go to your room and wait for me there!" would likely end up with me trying to crawl out the window. I remember one time she totally outsmarted me. In the house growing up we had deadbolt on the front door that was keyed on both sides. We usually kept it locked with the key inside the lock to use when needed. I was in trouble for something and as usual I made a mad dash for the front door. The key was gone. FAIL!

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
C was required once by my father but fell somewhere between C and D in that multiple Cs were used in succession. No blood or bruising that I recall. It was kind of like; WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!?! "well... I... uh..." *pop. "Um, I... I" *pop, "sniffle" *pop, but that was for drinking with friends in the house while he was out of town, rifling through his closet, and shooting bb guns out back at cans, bottles, and apparently the garage light.
I'm sure it seemed like a really good idea at the time!

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
Once my eldest brother returned C. Think Mayweather v Ortiz. *Actually, it was one shot to my dad, chase ensued until my father probably figured there was no perfect way to dispose of the body and eventually left the house to cool down.
Well like they say ... it's a thin line between bravery and foolishness. Even though I was much taller than my mother as a teen I simply could not raise my hands to her even if I wanted to. The mental intimidation factor was just too ingrained at that point. And going up against my father was simply unthinkable.


OAW
( Last edited by OAW; Sep 19, 2011 at 03:54 PM. )
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 04:52 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
I don't think it's as simple as "one size fits all", but I think "it works for some but not others" is equally simplistic.

Why does it work for some and not others? Wouldn't a great deal of this be based on parenting? If so, the "works for some and not others" argument is circular.
My husband and his brother are only about 15 mos apart. As kids their father made them "go find a switch" and gave them a couple swats on the butt for major infractions.

To this day, his brother (who turned out to be an angry, mean guy) holds that their father "beat the cr*p out of them" and resents him for it. My husband, who is a friendly, nice guy turned out fine, and believes that his dad just "did what he had to do"
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 06:47 PM
 
Why is this?

I know a pair of brothers who are one year apart. One's a smart, sensitive artist, one's a dim, violent jock *********.

While there's some of this which may have been genetics, sitting from the outside it's obvious this was shitty parenting. It wasn't that the jock needed physical punishment which they didn't provide, the kid needed love the parents didn't provide.

You see, the parents are sensitive artist types too, and as much as they tried, couldn't never hide the fact they liked the artist brother more.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 06:52 PM
 
Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
Sounds fairly reasonable. If respect isn't possible, I'll take fear.
When conditioning my kids vs. life and death decisions, I'll take fear over nothing every time. My daughter gets a 3-count, and 1 is enough to get her moving. If we get to 3, she gets spanked at least once on the rear end, even if she then complies. Time-out is usually enough (or, the THREAT of time-out), but I get to "THR..." about twice a week.

Yes, I was spanked as a kid. It made a huge impression on me. It works wonders.

I had a cousin a few years younger who was never spanked b/c his mom was trying to be progressive. That lasted until he was about 8, and then she just lost it on him b/c he was such a little sh*t to everyone and she finally noticed. It worked wonders.
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Sep 19, 2011, 07:05 PM
 
Originally Posted by Shaddim View Post
Umm, my sister told me to spank him if he misbehaved badly and wouldn't listen. He's usually a great kid, he was just a little obnoxious that day. Since then he's been a gentleman in our home.
If that works for you, then that's good. I choose not to have guests where it's mentioned up front they may misbehave to the point they need to be spanked.

If it's okay to spank this kid, where was the directive from your sister to not act up at your uncle's house under penalty of spanking when he got home?

If that directive was given, it obviously didn't work.
( Last edited by subego; Sep 19, 2011 at 07:13 PM. )
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 07:11 PM
 
Originally Posted by finboy View Post
When conditioning my kids vs. life and death decisions, I'll take fear over nothing every time.
Life or death is different.

In my book it's totally acceptable to give a quick swat to a kid who's about to pull a pot off the stove (as an example).

The key here is the swat being an order of magnitude less trauma than what was about to happen.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 07:27 PM
 
Originally Posted by The Final Dakar View Post
The same reason all people don't learn [best] through same types of teaching techniques. After all, isn't discipline a form of instruction?
Off-the-cuff, I'd say there are some "best practice" teaching techniques which work for most people, but those aren't generally used.

Since in their absence, you have a hodge-podge of subpar (not suboptimal, subpar) techniques, it appears as if there's a spread of what works, as each subpar technique gets traction with a limited group.

In case anyone is wondering, games are both the most valuable and most underutilized teaching tool.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 07:40 PM
 
Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
Both while much more discriminating of the circumstances that lead to the infraction. If this had always been their reaction, I suspect it wouldn't have been as effective.


Yes, but what is likely most bothersome to the parent is not the mere act of disobedience, but the patent stupidity evidenced by the scene in question.
I'm having an attack of the stupids here. I can't parse these. Can you rephrase?
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 07:57 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
I'm having an attack of the stupids here. I can't parse these. Can you rephrase?
If they immediately resort to spanking and/or threats of spanking, it's likely less effective. As someone else mentioned, part of the horror was knowing you drove your otherwise sane parents to acts of violence. If they're always resorting to acts of violence, you may think they're just insane.

regarding the stupidity of the scene; I just meant that it's one thing to go into your father's closet, but leaving the clothes strewn all about the place with some on you when he arrives or instead of simply shooting the bb gun out back at cans, getting drunk and shooting the bb gun at anything that seemed cool to shoot up.
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Sep 19, 2011, 08:03 PM
 
Funny you used that example because under that context is the only way your legally allowed to hit a kid in Canada with the changes to the law in 2008. In fact I think that exact example was used to justify physical correction in the case of preventing something more harming or seriously dangerous to the child or others.
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Sep 19, 2011, 08:54 PM
 
Originally Posted by subego View Post
Why is this?

I know a pair of brothers who are one year apart. One's a smart, sensitive artist, one's a dim, violent jock *********.

While there's some of this which may have been genetics, sitting from the outside it's obvious this was shitty parenting. It wasn't that the jock needed physical punishment which they didn't provide, the kid needed love the parents didn't provide.

You see, the parents are sensitive artist types too, and as much as they tried, couldn't never hide the fact they liked the artist brother more.
I hear that. His mother often says "I don't know what happened with that one... we always treated them exactly the same." But that's where I think parents can go wrong, each kid shouldn't be treated exactly the same, they need to be treated per their own specific needs. That just seems like a "duh" thing to me.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:06 PM
 
This guy's parents ask exactly the same question, and in the same vein, it's pretty "duh" from the outside.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:42 PM
 
Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
If they immediately resort to spanking and/or threats of spanking, it's likely less effective. As someone else mentioned, part of the horror was knowing you drove your otherwise sane parents to acts of violence. If they're always resorting to acts of violence, you may think they're just insane.
Ah. I understand. My dad's low-key setup worked for me along the same lines. 99% of the time he didn't get mad at me, he got disappointed. I think had he gotten mad all the time, it would have been much easier for me to reject it out of hand.

OTOH, actually getting mad enough to yell was such a rare experience, it made the point hard, just like you said. I had caused this calm, measured, rock of a person to lose their shit, and felt horrible for it.

Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
regarding the stupidity of the scene; I just meant that it's one thing to go into your father's closet, but leaving the clothes strewn all about the place with some on you when he arrives or instead of simply shooting the bb gun out back at cans, getting drunk and shooting the bb gun at anything that seemed cool to shoot up.
That's a pretty epic fail. Did he come home early?
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 09:57 PM
 
Corporeal punishment in the home has been outlawed in New Zealand since 2007.

But it's a very unpopular. In 2009, a citizens-initiated referendum was presented to parliament with the vast majority of 3 million voters against the smacking ban, but failed to effect a law change due to controversy over the way the question was worded.

It asked, "Should a smack as part of good parental correction be a criminal offence in New Zealand?"

The problem with this question is fairly obvious, I think.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:08 PM
 
I know this is drifting into PWL territory, but the idea of outlawing it seems ridiculous on a half-dozen levels.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:19 PM
 
^^^^

It's beyond stupid. But what's funny is that these same do-gooders that push these anti-spanking bans won't bat an eye if the cops beat the crap out of some other person's out-of-control kid the minute he breaks into their house.

OAW
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:22 PM
 
Half-dozen levels plus one.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:34 PM
 
Everyone agrees that it should be illegal for a parent to physically assault their child. I assume that proponents of the anti-smacking ban invoke a slippery slope argument.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:37 PM
 
Originally Posted by Poliphilo View Post
Everyone agrees that it should be illegal for a parent to physically assault their child. I assume that proponents of the anti-smacking ban invoke a slippery slope argument.
Case in point.

OAW
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:46 PM
 
Originally Posted by Poliphilo View Post
Everyone agrees that it should be illegal for a parent to physically assault their child. I assume that proponents of the anti-smacking ban invoke a slippery slope argument.
What do you think is meant by this? The definition of assault will slide?
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:48 PM
 
That sometimes the line between a smacking and a beating is a fine one?
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:49 PM
 
Once, I had received an expensive wall clock as a present for something when I was 6. I got curious about it, and took it apart, and wound up losing some of the smaller pieces somehow.

I think that the biggest reason why I got a long spanking (about 5 minutes) was because I had hid the broken clock, and didn't tell my folks.
     
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Sep 19, 2011, 11:57 PM
 
Spanking - calmly applying swats to the backside of the child with a hand, paddle, or thick strap.
Beating - angrily hitting the child with whatever is handy without regard to where you're striking them.

There are degrees each way, but mostly it comes down to whether the person administering the corporal punishment is upset. If you can't wait until your blood pressure settles before spanking the kid, you shouldn't be doing it.
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Sep 20, 2011, 12:04 AM
 
Originally Posted by brassplayersrock² View Post
Once, I had received an expensive wall clock as a present for something when I was 6. I got curious about it, and took it apart, and wound up losing some of the smaller pieces somehow.

I think that the biggest reason why I got a long spanking (about 5 minutes) was because I had hid the broken clock, and didn't tell my folks.
It kinda seems like the clock wasn't your property in the way you were led to imagine.
     
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Sep 20, 2011, 12:17 AM
 
Originally Posted by Poliphilo View Post
That sometimes the line between a smacking and a beating is a fine one?
As I posted earlier. The line between a spanking or ass whupping and a beating is quite clear. There really isn't anything "fine" about it.

OAW
     
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Sep 20, 2011, 12:22 AM
 
Originally Posted by OAW View Post
As I posted earlier. The line between a spanking or ass whupping and a beating is quite clear. There really isn't anything "fine" about it.

OAW
Reading back over it, it seems you could write that as law relatively easily.

The key components are 1) no bruising (or worse), and 2) no heavy objects. You do either, it's assault.

Edit: I'm sure there are hard-asses who think a bruised behind is okay, but I'm not going to lose sleep about them not being protected.
     
 
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