[fxbezak]

Ok so in 1 week my $7000 investment in hopes many dinners will be cooked will be arriving at the jeweler. I, unfortunately, do not know how to propose. Let me explain the situation...

My GF is the princess to end all princesses. I want it to be something public and yet romantic. I have no idea what to even do. Money is also an issue. I need to do something affordable (free or very close to it).

Suggestions?

[ironknee]

don't do it.


if you have to...no, no don't do it...

[olePigeon]

Take her on the Whirly Girty ride, then after she throws up, hand her a breath mint. But instead of a breath mint... THE RING!!!

You'll hug and kiss... well, hug anyway.

[the_glassman]

Don't Do It!!!

[rickey939]

If you need to ask the 'NN Lounge how to propose, I'm really going to second guess how successful your marriage is going to be.

[RAILhead]

I second, third, fourth and fifth what rickey said.

[dreilly1]

A few years back, my wife and I were at Disney World, eating dinner in the restaurant inside Cinderella's Castle. Someone had sent the ring ahead of him to the restaurant, and made a reservation for dinner for the same night we were there, right by the big window. During the fireworks, the ring came in on the dessert tray, and that's when he asked her. The whole restaurant staff clapped when she said yes.

After that display, our waitress came by and told us the whole story, at which point I turned to my wife and said "Well, he's got me beat!"

Good luck!

[Spliff]

Originally Posted by fxbezak

My GF is the princess to end all princesses.

Money is also an issue.

There's your problem. You ain't got the money to keep her happy. She'll say no to your proposal.

[Doofy]

Cannot comment without pics.

[Kerrigan]

Originally Posted by dreilly1

A few years back, my wife and I were at Disney World, eating dinner in the restaurant inside Cinderella's Castle. Someone had sent the ring ahead of him to the restaurant, and made a reservation for dinner for the same night we were there, right by the big window. During the fireworks, the ring came in on the dessert tray, and that's when he asked her. The whole restaurant staff clapped when she said yes.

Good luck!

Wait, what? You had another man propose for you?

[ironknee]

Originally Posted by Doofy

Cannot comment without pics.

i agree

Originally Posted by Kerrigan

Wait, what? You had another man propose for you?

yeah...he asked her?

[TailsToo]

Pretty much everyone i know who got married tells me they wish they didn't... it's depressing.

[Kerrigan]

People don't want to be alone for their whole lives. Nobody wants to become an old spinster. And yet, it seems like fewer people want to make the sacrafices required for a long term relationship to last.

You can't be "married" to the internet or TV or your job forever. Marriage, or even just long term commitments, are important for people as they give you someone to reliably count on in your life.

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

Do something corny like on Americas funniest videos.

Like burn "marry me" into some grass in a field and take her skydiving.

[JMan09]

Originally Posted by Kerrigan

Wait, what? You had another man propose for you?

If you saw the last part you would see that someone else was getting engaged, not him.

Originally Posted by dreilly1

After that display, our waitress came by and told us the whole story, at which point I turned to my wife and said "Well, he's got me beat!"

[Captain Obvious]

One word: prenuptial

[ironknee]

ok you start a thread here on macnn...and tell her this is interesting...

scroll down and say will you marry me?

we will all be there drinking (byob)

but don't do it

[greenamp]

You spent 7 grand on an engagement ring?

[alphasubzero949]

Originally Posted by greenamp

You spent 7 grand on an engagement ring?

Exactly.

[Warung]

Originally Posted by Kerrigan

People don't want to be alone for their whole lives. Nobody wants to become an old spinster. And yet, it seems like fewer people want to make the sacrafices required for a long term relationship to last.

I'm tackling with this issue myself right now. After being married for 3 years and now seperated for the same length of time, I can honestly say, me and my former wife are much closer than we were before. I still love her, and we've become pretty much "best friends".

I've only had about a handful (no pun intended) of GFs in the three years following, but I'm glad I didn't propose to any of them, or even stayed around them long enough to think about marriage. If I had my way, I'd just date a different girl every 6 months or so for the next 30 years...

Alas, I probably won't have it my way, I now need to make a choice...One thing's for sure though. Freedom is the new marriage. I just can't see myself living that way anymore.

[loki74]

Originally Posted by Scandalous Ion Cannon

Do something corny like on Americas funniest videos.

Like burn "marry me" into some grass in a field and take her skydiving.

THAT is a good idea!

(and yes, by good I mean terrible, but just plain funny)

[macmad]

Bold generalisation: marriage is a great way to ruin a good relationship.
FWIW, my advise would be "don't do it". People and times have changed, but marriage laws haven't - if things don't work out, and statistically it doesn't look good, you're in for a very long an expensive ride. You don't need a ring, or a contract with God, to show commitment.

[xenu]

Originally Posted by fxbezak

Ok so in 1 week my $7000 investment

Shouldn't you have made sure she wants to marry before buying such an expensive ring?

My wife and I were out shopping one afternoon and decided to have a look at some rings - we had been thinking about marriage, but had not really decided anything.

She liked what she saw, so we bought there and then - that was the proposal.

[nredman]

Originally Posted by rickey939

If you need to ask the 'NN Lounge how to propose, I'm really going to second guess how successful your marriage is going to be.

nothing more to see here

[kiwibabe]

Originally Posted by fxbezak

Ok so in 1 week my $7000 investment in hopes many dinners will be cooked will be arriving at the jeweler. I, unfortunately, do not know how to propose. Let me explain the situation...

My GF is the princess to end all princesses. I want it to be something public and yet romantic. I have no idea what to even do. Money is also an issue. I need to do something affordable (free or very close to it).

Suggestions?

Since I am a female I would suggest doing the following:

A romantic picnic in the park (preferably with lots of roses around) on a warm summers day.

[Mastrap]

Since everybody seems to be really down on marriage: I love my wife, I love being married to her and don't regret it one bit. While marriage hasn't changed much on the outside, we had been living together for quite some time, it has brought us closer together as a couple. There's something about sharing the same name that you just don't get by 'just' being boyfriend and girlfriend.

My parents have been happily married for 34 years now and I am hoping to follow their example.

[ghporter]

I'm hoping that you are just out of "romantic" ideas, not searching for the "clincher" to make sure she'll accept. If that's the case, remember that simple and elegant trumps EVERYTHING.

Take her to dinner at a very nice place. AFTER the main course and before dessert, get out of your chair, kneel next to her, open the ring box and say "Will you marry me?" That's public, elegant, straightforward and very romantic.

Possible problems: it has to be a VERY NICE place; not necessarily really expensive, but do your homework for classy atmosphere, classy clientele, and the cooperativeness of management and staff (hint: asking the manager for a little help setting it up gets the whole place on your side).

Now, if you are really trying to just sell the idea of marrying you, then most of the earlier posters are right and you're asking in the wrong place.

FWIW, I proposed repeatedly over a two week period until my wife finally took me seriously. That was a little over 26 years ago...

[Millennium]

Ooh; this stuff is right up my alley. Some background information first, and then I have a few questions for you.

One thing to keep in mind: many people will tell you that the wedding is the time for the bride to shine and be on display and such, and this is pretty much true as far as it goes. The proposal is your time to shine. Fortunately, with a little creativity, you can do this much more affordably than the bride. Here is my story.

My then-girlfriend and I had been together in a mostly long-distance relationship for some eight years. The idea of getting married once she was out of grad school was basically a foregone conclusion. We'd even gone ring shopping together, though I hadn't actually bought anything in her presence: after we'd been to a bunch of places I went back to one of them alone and picked out a ring based on the features she'd liked when we went together. She also had no clue as to when I was going to propose. After all, just because we knew things were coming didn't mean there couldn't be some surprise to things.

So anyway, this was where I enlisted the help of her friends. She went to Bryn Mawr College for her undergrad studies, and I'd visited many times. Anyone familiar with that school can tell you about all the traditions there, but there was one in particular called Lantern Night: a sort of initiation for the incoming frosh that I'd attended once already, and which she went back to see on a regular basis. This provided a perfect excuse for the two of us to be in the same place at the same time. STEP ONE: Pick a site which is important to the two of you.

Anyway, BMC not only has a lot of traditions, but a lot of superstitions. Many of these involve the various arches on campus. I later found out that these vary depending on who you ask, but from what I'd been told by my girlfriend and her friends, the arch under Pembrooke Hall had an interesting one: couples who kissed under that arch would stay together forever. She and I had kissed under that arch many times, it was right in the middle of campus, so we had to go under it to get almost anywhere. STEP TWO: Pick a place on the chosen site where you know you'll have to go, and if possible pick one with particularly romantic connotations.

The night before I planned to propose, she and I did a fair amount of talking. We were actually going through a somewhat rocky time in the relationship for a variety of reasons I won't go into here, and so we were talking about where we saw ourselves in the years to come. The subject of wandering -in the sense of travel and living spaces- came up, and we talked about wandering together, and we both ended up taking a lot of comfort in that thought. When the time came to propose, the question I actually asked was "Will you wander with me forever?" STEP THREE: Use wording which has special meaning to the two of you. Set it up if you have to.

STEP FOUR: Having enlisted the help of her friends, I was able to make sure they had cameras at the ready. This is a Good Thing.

The rest, as they say, is history.

So, let's review. Pick a place and a question with meaning to the two of you. Marriage is a very personal thing, so the proposal should be just as personal. Use a place with romantic connotations; love is the most important thing a married couple can have, so work it into the proposal. And finally, make sure there are people with cameras on hand.

Now, having gone through all of this, my questions:
1) Are there any places nearby which have special meaning to you both? The place where you went on your first date may be a good choice, or a place where you went on some particularly memorable date.
2) Are there any places nearby with particularly romantic legends or connotations that you both know about? Hopefully there's overlap with places that have special meaning to you both.
3) Are there any particular phrases -song lyrics, inside jokes, or whatever- with special meaning that you could incorporate your question? I don't intend to help you write the question -your words here need to be entirely your own- but answering the question may help you recall something.

[Athens]

You realize when you married men sleep with a woman every night and dont get any sex?

[Warung]

Originally Posted by Athens

You realize when you married men sleep with a woman every night and dont get any sex?

Excuse the pun, - but come again?

[wallinbl]

Originally Posted by TailsToo

Pretty much everyone i know who got married tells me they wish they didn't... it's depressing.

Your friends are lousy. Get new ones.

[ghporter]

Originally Posted by Athens

You realize when you married men sleep with a woman every night and dont get any sex?

I beg to differ. My wife and I have been married over 25 years, and your assertion lacks all credibility when applied to our relationship. The only times we have not had sex have been when I was assigned away from home-and those were very seldom. It takes work to keep any relationship going, but it's worth it if you are both truly committed.

[RAILhead]

I'm happily married for 8 years, FWIW. You just have to lay down the law sometimes, but women are worth it (some of them are).

[Millennium]

Originally Posted by TailsToo

Pretty much everyone i know who got married tells me they wish they didn't... it's depressing.

I think a lot of that comes from the relatively fast pace of life nowadays. Getting married means committing to someone for life. When you think about it, that's not for the faint of heart; in human terms it may as well be forever. Deciding that you want to spend the rest of your life with is not a quick process. It doesn't have to take eight years, but finding out that someone is the kind of person you're willing to make sacrifices for, and who you know is willing to make those same kinds of sacrifices for you, for the rest of your lives takes a long time, and people don't often spend that time nowadays. They're to anxious to get to "the good part", motivated by fear or desire in a world where things which don't come quickly often seem to never come at all.

[dreilly1]

Originally Posted by Kerrigan

Wait, what? You had another man propose for you?

OK, for those of you scoring at home (and those of you who are alone)....

The gentleman at the other table brought his girlfriend along with him, and proposed to her. My wife and I watched the whole thing, but couldn't really tell what was going on until it was explained to us.

I proposed to my wife at Niagara Falls, Canada. Which sounds more exotic than it really was, since I was living near Buffalo at the time, and Niagara Falls was only 20 minutes away, so we went there quite often. This was Pre-9/11, and Pre-Casino Niagara, so going to Niagara on the spur of the moment just to kill time was less of a hassle than it is now. There was a particular spot in one of the parks under a willow tree which we always liked to sit under, and I proposed while we were sitting there.

On the way back*, when the border guard asked "Do you have anything to declare?", my wife said "Yeah, I'm getting married!", and showed off the ring. Everyone laughed, and they let us through with no hassles, but just in case I had the reciept for the ring in my pocket to prove I bought in the US and didn't owe any duty on it!

[FONT=Arial Narrow]* = We always parked on the American side and walked across, so that we wouldn't get caught in traffic on the bridge. They also used to give pedestrians a generally easier time with ID issues. I don't think that's the case anymore.[/FONT]

[wdlove]

Congratulations on your upcoming proposal fxbezak. I'm now happily married 33 years, Just ask her for her hand in marriage. I wish you all the best.

[cc_foo]

How is $7000 on an engagement ring an investment?

[SirCastor]

Congrats on your proposing, or rather, your upcoming proposal. I say don't do public. Definately go Romantic, pick a good spot like a waterfront, or a really nice park. That's me anyway. I'm gonna be proposing on some romantic vista. Private. Make her the center of the evening.

One knee, one ring, No turning Back...
This summer, only on...
[IMG="http://img166.imageshack.us/img166/905/fox8ce.jpg]

Sorry, I got carried away

[dreilly1]

Originally Posted by cc_foo

How is $7000 on an engagement ring an investment?

Well, he's expecting the return on his investment in the form of "many dinners cooked".

He's obviously in for a rude awakening, but if we tell him now it will totally ruin his romantic mood, so let's keep it secret, ok? .

[historylme]

Millennium has a great point.

However, having been engaged twice in my life... and now not. I like my freedom at lot better.

But if you must, I say go to dinner and then go for a stroll afterwards. Then pop the question. Or simply go do something that she loves to do and then do it.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by TailsToo

Pretty much everyone i know who got married tells me they wish they didn't... it's depressing.

Most people I know say the opposite.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by dreilly1

On the way back*, when the border guard asked "Do you have anything to declare?", my wife said "Yeah, I'm getting married!", and showed off the ring.

[smacintush]

Originally Posted by cc_foo

How is $7000 on an engagement ring an investment?

It's not. Anyone who spends that much on a ring has been brainwashed or is severely pussy-whipped.

[smacintush]

Marriage isn't bad, but it's definitely NOT for the squeamish. Young people today just don't have what it takes to stick with it.

My advice. Take back the overpriced rock if you can. Buy one that's reasonable and bank the money. You'll need it to pay for the lawyer in a year or two anyway.

If she doesn't want the cheaper ring tell her to go f*ck herself.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by smacintush

Marriage isn't bad, but it's definitely NOT for the squeamish. Young people today just don't have what it takes to stick with it.

My advice. Take back the overpriced rock if you can. Buy one that's reasonable and bank the money. You'll need it to pay for the lawyer in a year or two anyway.

If she doesn't want the cheaper ring tell her to go f*ck herself.

[jcadam]

My wife's ring holds a 1/3 ct. diamond and cost me a whole $350 (I was in college, man). She didn't really care, she comes from a lower-income family than I do

I gave her the ring and proposed to her right after sex. While still in bed.

We've been married 6 years now, so far, so good...

[OreoCookie]

Originally Posted by smacintush

Marriage isn't bad, but it's definitely NOT for the squeamish. Young people today just don't have what it takes to stick with it.

Hey, speak for yourself. Some of us are still believing in it.

[Captain Obvious]

Originally Posted by smacintush

It's not. Anyone who spends that much on a ring has been brainwashed or is severely pussy-whipped.

We must have different standards on what is excessive for a ring. I was thinking anything less than 15K is going cheap.

[CanadaRAM]

Originally Posted by fxbezak

I want it to be something public

Ummm... why?
Public = pressure to act a certain way.

If you want it public to increase your chance of a 'yes' because she'd feel bad to turn you down in front of onlookers/friends/relatives = bad, bad reason = time to re-evaluate your true position as a couple.

This ain't a decision you get to make alone. I vote for private, in a place where you can discuss everything tht needs discussing (and potentially celebrate in private ways, too )

[Scandalous Ion Cannon]

45% divorce rate in the US. So much for the sanctity of marriage.