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Why puking makes me feel better
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Mac Elite
Join Date: May 2001
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Hear me out....
I rarely throw up from drinking. Don't get me wrong, I drink A LOT. Its one of the few admirable qualities that I possess. Most of the time I just consume large quantities of liquor, get sleepy and then retire for the evening. But on the rare occasion, things get dicey. The other night I was hanging out with a younger crew. College aged beer swillers. I normally don't have the patience, but what the ****. It's good to get out and see the latest trends in fashion and lame attempts to pick up chicks.
OT: What the **** is up with guys wearing tight black jeans with studded belts. I think I even saw a few tight rollers. It's not cool. At all. Stop.
Anyway, yeah, college kids... drinking beer and listening to shitty ska remakes of 80's songs. Awesome. So I quickly realize that I'm in absolute hell. Do I do the smart thing and pay $30 for a cab? Nah, I figure I'll drown my sorrow with glass after glass of something 80 proof. From here, things rapidly deteriorate.
I gotta admit, I wasn't feeling that great towards the end. Tummy was a little off and I could feel a twinge or two in the back of my throat. All in all, totally manageable. But then I found myself in the bathroom peeing. Bored, tired and irritated with myself. It was then that I decided that puking would make me feel much, much better.
Seriously, I didn't have to throw up. I've thrown up twice in the last 7 years. I **** you not when I say this time it was different. I've never tried to make myself throw up. It's actually kind of hard. I tried the finger trick and gagged myself a bit. It must have taken me 5 minutes just to produce a spittle of vomit. Holy **** though. Once I got started, I can't even describe what it must have looked like. Rent Team America if you really want an idea.
I know you're thinking "gross! great, you drank too much and puked in a bar bathroom."
It's not like that. I really, really enjoyed spraying vomit all over that bathroom. I got the toilet, the floor, a sink, two walls, a urinal and ended with some good coverage on the mirror. Oh, and somehow, I didn't get a drop on my clothes. It was a miracle. All I can say is that I felt fantastic as a result. Seriously, I must have laughed for 20 minutes. Physically, I felt like ****. Somehow, purging the contents of my stomach caused my bodies systems to start shutting down. It wasn't long before I was 90% incapacitated. Luckily, my antics caused my crew to assemble and prepare for departure. I'm not sure about everyone else, but I really had a great time and I'm REALLY looking forward to next weekend. Should be a blast.
Whew. I made myself cry a bit retelling that. Guess you had to be there. And be really drunk. Anyway. Any good alcohol + puke stories?
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
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I once puked in a potted plant in the lobby of a hotel.
That's pretty much my best alcohol related puking story (I also don't often puke from drinking too much).
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Yamanashi, Japan
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I puked into a window well outside my dorm the morning after a night of heavy drinking. Good times.
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Baninated
Join Date: Oct 2002
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I puked in a toilet a few times. I swear.
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Addicted to MacNN
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I took a dump in the Empire State Building.
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Registered User
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Gotta say, as much as I'd love to murder every guy that wears tight black jeans and studded belts, with pink shirts collar-up, I'd rather hang around with them than someone that thinks it's funny to vomit everywhere. Well, maybe not; I'd rather just kill myself, but the point remains.
On topic, and potentially inappropriate: a mate of mine swears the best sex he ever had was when the chick he was doing doggy-style started vomiting during the act.
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Baninated
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In yer threads
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Cipher well when you vomit your muscles tighten up. So that makes some sense.
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
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Originally Posted by Cipher13
On topic, and potentially inappropriate: a mate of mine swears the best sex he ever had was when the chick he was doing doggy-style started vomiting during the act.
I wouldn't be too surprised. Think of all the muscles that contract when you're vomiting.
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2000
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Originally Posted by Kevin
Cipher well when you vomit your muscles tighten up. So that makes some sense.
Oh yeah, I don't doubt he's right. That's not to say I'd induce vomiting in a chick just for the hell of it.
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Baninated
Join Date: Oct 2002
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Hey I bet her muscles would do stuff when she vomited.
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Senior User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: 54 56' 38" .058N / 10 0' 33" .071E
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I once woke in my bed up after a night out, and found that I had vomited on my pillow and behind my bed! Needless to say I must have been plastered not to remember that...
That was the last time I drank 10 pints of Guinness together with Tequila.
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The gene pool needs cleaning - I'll be the chlorine.
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Baninated
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In yer threads
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Originally Posted by vexborg
I once woke in my bed up after a night out, and found that I had vomited on my pillow and behind my bed! Needless to say I must have been plastered not to remember that...
That's a really bad thing. Many people have died that way. I can honestly say I've only been sick ONCE from drinking too much. Not that I can "handle my alcohol" I just never drink a lot at once. One night when I was 19 me and my GF, her best friend and my brother went out and bought some vodka.. anyhow I got sick at the end of the night. Was pretty freaking trashed. I used to get "buzzed" a lot to the point I was probably on the verge or close to becoming an alcoholic.
Then I "found" weed and stopped drinking all together. This was around my college years. I was 19-21. Me and my friends actually messed around with LSD at the time. It was easier to get than anything else for some reason. I could get a sheet (100 hits) for $70. Sell 15 make $5 and have 85 hits to ourselves.
I bought an amplifier that summer from LSD money.
Still have it.
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Dec 2001
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Woke up the first morning I spent in my college dorm to the sounds of a bunch of guys complaining about how someone had puked in the urinals and the whole place was a mess. Didn't realize it was me that had done it until I walked in there and the memory suddenly hit me. That was one of two times I've ever puked from drinking too much. The other time involved drinking too much Sam Adams Cherry Wheat. I could taste a hint of cherry on my breath for three days. I'll probably never touch that beer again.
Not puking, but peeing in the next one. Was at the local college dive for a few hours drinking. Had to pee pretty badly and went to get in the bathroom line. Came up to the toilet, unzipped and started peeing. After a few seconds, the guy behind me informs me that the toilet I'm pissing into doesn't have any plumbing - it's just being used as a door stop.
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
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Originally Posted by wallinbl
Not puking, but peeing in the next one. Was at the local college dive for a few hours drinking. Had to pee pretty badly and went to get in the bathroom line. Came up to the toilet, unzipped and started peeing. After a few seconds, the guy behind me informs me that the toilet I'm pissing into doesn't have any plumbing - it's just being used as a door stop.
Nice.
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Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Oct 2002
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Also not vomiting, but I've never really been able to burp, so a lot of the time after a night of heavy drinking I have to induce my gag reflex and go into sort of a dry heave to expel the gas. So it really does make me feel better.
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"One ticket to Washington, please. I have a date with destiny."
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Baninated
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In yer threads
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I've heard writers compare vomiting while intoxicating to having orgasms as well. The feeling of release. I don't see it. I hate puking.
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Mac Elite
Join Date: Aug 2004
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Age 12 or so, first time drunk, puked for hours. To this day the smell of Schnapps...<blerp>
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Mac Elite
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Pittsburgh
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I don't puke often at all either, but one time I got hammered and woke up the next morning feeling the worst I have ever felt.
took a shower, felt a little better. turned the shower off and started puking all over the shower stall. yellow bile ****, it was disgusting.
then I called my girlfriend who went to school in NYC and I told her I probably wasn't going to be able to visit her. she whined and I bucked up.
the 6 hour bus trip was hell. I felt like throwing up the entire time and the bus was filled to capacity. I went to the bus bathroom about 3 times and dry heaved in the toilet, which was splashing that blue **** around.
the entire bus ride I sat in my seat with my head between my legs. got to new york city and it was a shitty visit.
all in all a **** ass weekend, but that thursday night was pretty fun.
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Forum Regular
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: The Capital of Silicon Valley
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Freshman year, a couple of guys and I thought it was a good idea to go to Mexico for Labor Day weekend, and sleep on the beach for a night. We drank most of a 1L bottle of tequila, and a six-pack of Corona. I puked all over the sand (and myself), and ended up sleeping right next to and probably on top off, the vomit-sand. Good times.
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Mac Elite
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Denton, TX
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I've killed a patch of my neighbor's grass after being dropped off at 4 am. I was holding it in the whole ride home (worst feeling) and practically fell out of the car and spewed on the edge of his yard. I don't think he ever knew what happened.
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"This show is filmed before a live studio audience as soon as someone removes that dead guy!" - Stephen Colbert
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Dedicated MacNNer
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Singapore
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I don't puke too much, and when I do I'm usually good about finding the toilet / bucket / outdoors. I have puked in a couple good places while wandering home from the bar, including in front of a guard between the Iranian and American consulates in Shanghai (they're across the street from one another; I bet that's going well ) and the Shanghai Public Security Bureau headquarters.
I think the most important lesson is that spicy food (in this case Thai papaya salad) should kept down at all costs - after 3 hours of digestion and way too much beer and vodka, my stomach had made no progress on the chilies.
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Mac Elite
Join Date: May 2001
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Originally Posted by Cipher13
Gotta say, as much as I'd love to murder every guy that wears tight black jeans and studded belts, with pink shirts collar-up, I'd rather hang around with them than someone that thinks it's funny to vomit everywhere.
Point taken. I mean, girls have to find that crap kind of cute too or these guys wouldn't be doing it.
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Mac Elite
Join Date: May 2001
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Chilies... uhg. Terrifying. Yeah, I left out the part of the story where I had been eating Mexican right before heading out.
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Senior User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: 54 56' 38" .058N / 10 0' 33" .071E
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Originally Posted by Kevin
That's a really bad thing. Many people have died that way...
Then I "found" weed and stopped drinking all together. This was around my college years. I was 19-21. Me and my friends actually messed around with LSD at the time. It was easier to get than anything else for some reason. I could get a sheet (100 hits) for $70. Sell 15 make $5 and have 85 hits to ourselves. .
Yep, I know - to be honest I've never gotten that drunk after that experience, that was just way to horrible.
I would rather prefer a good joint and a glass of whiskey.
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The gene pool needs cleaning - I'll be the chlorine.
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Fort Lauderdale, FL
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I've thrown up a lot, a few were memorable, but I don't remember them too well.
Last time was at the M.I.A. concert about two weeks ago. Threw up a filet mignon and 5 vodka/tonics in the streets of Miami.
I smoked after dinner, and having drank some stiff beverages already, I probably shouldn't have. Drinking then smoking then drinking some more is usually bad for me.
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ice
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Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: England | San Francisco
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Vomitting from booze? Who hasn't!
We used to play numerous drinking games with wine rather than spirits. Brutal.
I've since seen the light and stick to cocktails if i'm on a big night out. Mmm Mojitos.
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we don't have time to stop for gas
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Nashville, TN
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I've never been drunk enough to vomit... just hasn't happened. Hell, I haven't vomited since 1997.
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Don't try to outweird me, I get stranger things than you free with my breakfast cereal.
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Forum Regular
Join Date: Dec 2003
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I'm a big fan of wine, yet I have actually never been drunk before. It ruins the enjoyment of the wine for me.
I know I'm the odd one out though.
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Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Mar 2001
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No one cares about my dump at the Empire State Building?
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: 46 & 2
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Originally Posted by RAILhead
No one cares about my dump at the Empire State Building?
My buddy took a sh*t in a cab while in New York, is that close enough?
Damn, that was a harsh weekend, I barely remember the trip at all. It's just one huge blur.
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"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
- Thomas Paine
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
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Originally Posted by Shaddim
My buddy took a sh*t in a cab while in New York, is that close enough?
Damn, that was a harsh weekend, I barely remember the trip at all. It's just one huge blur.
Ha, weekends in NY tend to be harsh. One weekend I broke off the key to my condo trying to get inside and ended up sleeping on a park bench in SoHo. I was so drunk that I was still blacked out when I woke up the next morning and when I came to I had already walked all the way to East Village. Man was that a fun night.
Oh yeah, and the reason I couldn't get into my condo and ended up breaking my key was that my condo is in Boston. I just consider myself lucky that I didn't get arrested breaking into someone's car because I walked past one that looked exactly like the car I was driving at the time and thankfully didn't decide to drive home in it...
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Originally Posted by RAILhead
I took a dump in the Empire State Building.
In a bathroom, or someplace a little more dangerous such as an elevator?
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Originally Posted by RAILhead
No one cares about my dump at the Empire State Building?
I care! I laughed at your story and wnat to know more about the ending. Don't leave us hanging like that!
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Originally Posted by Shaddim
My buddy took a sh*t in a cab while in New York, is that close enough?
Damn, that was a harsh weekend, I barely remember the trip at all. It's just one huge blur.
No way! In his pants, or in the cab itself? What did the taxi driver say?
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: South of the Mason-Dixon line
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I have a story involving Waffle House, some killer weed, way too much to drink, and some paramedics.
Not sure you dolts are worthy of the details.
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Originally Posted by Spliffdaddy
I have a story involving Waffle House, some killer weed, way too much to drink, and some paramedics.
Not sure you dolts are worthy of the details.
Is this the story you told us about that one time that involved the strippers and the paint thinner, or is that another one?
(
Last edited by besson3c; Nov 18, 2007 at 08:12 PM.
)
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: 46 & 2
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Originally Posted by besson3c
No way! In his pants, or in the cab itself? What did the taxi driver say?
From what I remember, he pulled down his shorts and did it off the edge of the seat. The cab was kinda smelly beforehand, and it was pretty late at night, so somehow the driver didn't notice. I was too mortified to react, I just sat on the far side of the back seat trying not to swear at him, nasty bastard.
I felt so bad I tipped the cabbie an extra $20, I guess he thought I was just a generous drunk.
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"Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it."
- Thomas Paine
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Berkshire, UK
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Originally Posted by Uriel
I'm a big fan of wine, yet I have actually never been drunk before. It ruins the enjoyment of the wine for me.
I know I'm the odd one out though.
If you've never done it, how do you know it ruins the enjoyment?
I'm not a fan of getting drunk myself, I generally leave off at a healthy buzz, but at least I know this from experience.
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Mar 2004
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Vomitting from booze? Who hasn't!
*raises hand*
Passed out immediately, once (moral of that story: if you’re five, don’t mix pure Mexican chili with grain alcohol, and if you have an older friend who’s told you that that horrible, burning red thing you just took a bite of was a sweet fruit, don’t believe him when he says he’ll give you a glass of water); but never vomited.
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Wow, it seems like everybody here has thrown up somewhere, gotten high in a Waffle house with some paint thinner and strippers, or pooped in a cab or the Empire State Building. All I've done is gotten high from Kikkoman soy sauce.
I feel like I don't fit in here. It's cool to not do all those things, right?
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Posting Junkie
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Baltimore, MD
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Originally Posted by Spliffdaddy
I have a story involving Waffle House, some killer weed, way too much to drink, and some paramedics.
Not sure you dolts are worthy of the details.
I thought you said White House at first. I was about to demand details just to know how it involved the paramedics and not the secret service.
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Truthfully, the one night I went too far was when I was working a cruise ship and was trying to impress this British dancer. She had a big birthday cake, so I tried to impress her by eating as much as possible. I think I ate about 30 pieces or so. I also drank a little too much, so I was feeling it in the morning.
I didn't score either, so it was really for nothing. Kind of a pathetic story.
It was pretty good cake though.
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Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Originally Posted by besson3c
I care! I laughed at your story and wnat to know more about the ending. Don't leave us hanging like that!
I laid cable in the highest toilet in the building. Nothing fancy -- but I did get a little light-headed from pushing that hard so high up.
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Yamanashi, Japan
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To be honest I enjoy taking a nice large poo after a night fo heavy drinking. That makes me feel better than throwing up.
One of my older coworkers (american guy) was drinkign heavily at a BBQ, then followed it up by doing some very heavy drinking in a cramped karaoke room. Seems he threw up over a large portion of the place in front of about 12 other highly drunk foreigners. Then he went off and continued drinking at a bar. Made me think 'Thank god I'm not 33 and acting like a dick college student during spring break'.
Anyways, this is why I don't go to that karaoke place anymore. Event though it wasn't me, I still feel the shame!
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: yes
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Originally Posted by RAILhead
I laid cable in the highest toilet in the building. Nothing fancy -- but I did get a little light-headed from pushing that hard so high up.
That's awesome! Has anybody here pooped in the CN Tower?
Railhead: you've done some web development before, right? What do you think about a: http://www.towerpooping.com site to chronicle your journeys?
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Mac Elite
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Where my body is
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Professional Poster
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Yamanashi, Japan
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Originally Posted by besson3c
It was pretty good cake though.
The cake is a lie...
The cake is a lie...
The cake is a lie...
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Clinically Insane
Join Date: Mar 2001
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Here is what happens when typewriters get drunk:
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Copenhagen
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Skidefuld og på rulleskøjter. Literally.
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Senior User
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Martha's Vineyard
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I was a sergeant in the Corps in 84, and I had never drunk red wine before that one night. After consuming a vast quantity of some Boones farms or some crap I woke up on my rack more sick than I think I had ever been before. I had a room at the end of a wing of a barrack, and the urge to purge hit me hard. I ran as fast as I could down the hall, turned the corner hard and was up to the swinging door of the head when it all let loose. As I pushed the door open that vile concoction of red wine and cheetos took on a life of its own and came gushing forth - unfortunately all over a fresh private just out of boot. I don't think a drop landed on the deck, but did paint his cammie blouse crimson. I think I mentioned I was sorry, but I did feel so much better after. Unfortunately for the boot I didn't think til later that it might have been better for all concerned if I just turned over and hurled in my waste basket.
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