[Zimphire]

Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy. Rob is a

commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in LOUISIANA. He performs

underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he

sent to his sister.


She then sent it to a radio station 103.2 on your FM dial in Ft. Wayne,

Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to

say she won.




Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a

bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work,

so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's

not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I

first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.


As you know my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to

the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of the year the water is quite

cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered

industrial water heater.


This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It

heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the

diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this

sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no

complaints.


What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working is take the hose,

and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit

with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going

well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So of course I

scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my

butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the

damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water

machine had sucked up a jellyfish, and pumped it into my suit. Now

since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to

it. However the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.


When I scratched what I thought was an itch. I was actually grinding

the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive

supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were

unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers were all

laughing hysterically.


Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three

agonizing in-water decompressions stops totaling thirty-five minutes

before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.


When I arrived at the surface I was wearing nothing, but my brass

helmet. As I climbed out of the water. The medic with tears of

laughter running down his face handed me a tube of cream, and told me

to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put

the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was

swollen shut.


So next time you're having a bad day at work think about how worse it

would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your behind.


Now repeat to yourself, "I Love My Job, I Love My Job, I Love My Job..."

[iWrite]

Yes, that doesn't sound very good.

I've had a terrible month.

In fact, it's one of the worst months in my life.

If I told you all about it I would start to cry -- again.



So, I won't -- but its been bad.

To top it all off, on top of everything else, my dog ate a poisonous toad last night during his 10 minutes in the back yard for his "duties" and now I'm not sure he's going to live.

[ironknee]

Originally posted by iWrite:


Yes, that doesn't sound very good.

I've had a terrible month.

In fact, it's one of the worst months in my life.

If I told you all about it I would start to cry -- again.



So, I won't -- but its been bad.

To top it all off, on top of everything else, my dog ate a poisonous toad last night during his 10 minutes in the back yard for his "duties" and now I'm not sure he's going to live.

hang in there...only one more week till this month is over

[iWrite]

1. I've been sick for 6 weeks -- nausea and vomiting for up to 24 hours a day.

2. Lufthansa "lost" my 10 year old son on a flight back from Italy (he was at soccer camp there and visiting relatives) because they made him unaccompanied when I paid $120 for him to be escorted by stewardesses on the two legs of his flight back from Milan. So, he went to Paris because he wandered, unaccompanied, when he went into Frankfurt Germany and *somehow* got onto the connecting flight to Paris. Imagine how freaked out we were? He handled it well and managed to find a policeman at the airport and they kept him safe. Yes, he's back but only because I had a relative fly to Paris to pick him up personally.

3. My spouse forgot our anniversary because of working 70 hours a week -- thought it was 3 days later.

4. Our vacation of one week was canceled because of bad weather -- the first real vacation in two years.

5. Found out someone has bought a car in my name -- found this out yesterday -- and hasn't been making the payments so now my credit is affected. Today I found out that there are two credit cards in my name that I didn't apply for, they're maxed out, and now I have to deal with THAT -- on top of being sick.

6. My dog bit a poisonous toad last night and now he might not live and if he lives he'll probably have severe kidney damage.

And there's more piddly stuff but it all adds up to being very depressed -- and then I'm sick to my stomach constantly.

So, that's why this month is terrible for me.

[IUJHJSDHE]

Originally posted by iWrite:
1. I've been sick for 6 weeks -- nausea and vomiting for up to 24 hours a day.

2. Lufthansa "lost" my 10 year old son on a flight back from Italy (he was at soccer camp there and visiting relatives) because they made him unaccompanied when I paid $120 for him to be escorted by stewardesses on the two legs of his flight back from Milan. So, he went to Paris because he wandered, unaccompanied, when he went into Frankfurt Germany and *somehow* got onto the connecting flight to Paris. Imagine how freaked out we were? He handled it well and managed to find a policeman at the airport and they kept him safe. Yes, he's back but only because I had a relative fly to Paris to pick him up personally.

3. My spouse forgot our anniversary because of working 70 hours a week -- thought it was 3 days later.

4. Our vacation of one week was canceled because of bad weather -- the first real vacation in two years.

5. Found out someone has bought a car in my name -- found this out yesterday -- and hasn't been making the payments so now my credit is affected. Today I found out that there are two credit cards in my name that I didn't apply for, they're maxed out, and now I have to deal with THAT -- on top of being sick.

6. My dog bit a poisonous toad last night and now he might not live and if he lives he'll probably have severe kidney damage.

And there's more piddly stuff but it all adds up to being very depressed -- and then I'm sick to my stomach constantly.

So, that's why this month is terrible for me.

Wow, that all sucks, poor dog.

[iWrite]

No sympathy is necessary, thanks, though.



I'm sure it will get better.

And, like that old adage, it could be worse. It can always get worse.

[mixin visuals]

damn... preperation H should have helped too

[christ]

iWrite - your real name isn't "Job" is it?

You really do seem to be on G*d's sh1tlist.

[iWrite]

Well, I think that God is still watching out for us.

Just got back from the veterinarian's office and the dog is going to be fine after all -- WHEW.

He has a bacterial infection that they're treating with antibiotics and he should be fine. I felt so bad for the little guy. First they said that he'd probably bitten or eaten one of the poisonous toads indigenous to the area and they're usually very harmful or fatal.

They kept him there (at the vet's office) today and everything turned out fine and his only problem is a bacterial infection.

So, that's a big positive in the day.

As for the other stuff, well, I believe everything happens for a reason.

Lufthansa gave us two first class international tickets (round trip) for their screw up with our son so I'm happy about that.

As far as being sick myself, well, I'll get over it eventually.

Now I'm got to relax and chill out.

[mydog8mymac]

Originally posted by iWrite:
Lufthansa gave us two first class international tickets (round trip) for their screw up with our son so I'm happy about that.

Well that's the least they could do! -and I do mean the least.

I hope you are soon well engough to use them.

[iWrite]

Thank you!



That was very nice of you.

They're good for a year. Our son will probably use them for travel back and forth to relatives in Europe on his vacations.

We don't vacation very much -- working too much!

[boardsurfer]

My wife is a firm believer that bad things happen in three's.

iWrite, I think you are over your limit and can now look forward to an upswing!

Man the jellyfish thing - ouch. Getting stung is one thing, but grinding it in, and then waiting 35 minutes! OUCH.

[iWrite]

Yeah, that was quite a story!

Has anyone ever been stung by jellyfish?

It SO painful. It not only stings and burns, but it's like being stabbed with a knife. Horrible. I've been stung by man o' war jellyfish and it was pretty bad. Even if the tentacles are separated from the main jellyfish body the tentacles still contain the toxin and every little piece that touches your skin burns you. It's terrible.

[catsank]

I wouldn't trust my ten year old to travel up the road
without all hell breaking loose on him - let alone travel on a plane
- with or without a stewardesses - both spell trouble.

But he does love soccer:)

This is his hero...da Filippo INZAGHI.

[Sarc]

"You know, man, it could be worse. A woman could cut off your penis while you are sleeping and toss it out the window of a moving car."
-Tyler Durden

[Spheric Harlot]

Originally posted by iWrite:
As far as being sick myself, well, I'll get over it eventually.

Now I'm got to relax and chill out.

There a light at the end of the tunnel...hope you get well soon.

I realize it's in bad taste, but I can't help thinking that you seem to keep losing your son... (no offense, please)

My sympathies; glad to hear the kid, and the dog, are right-side-up.

-s*