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JERRYJERRYJERRY · May 22, 2005, 11:29 PM

in the movie bob and carol and ted and alice they couldnt go through with it.

if you really loved another couple could you share a bed with them?

i dont think i could because it would be embarrassing if they werent pleasing to me or if they were overly pleasing to my spouse and we would have to stop our friendship.

what about you?

KeriVit · May 22, 2005, 11:36 PM

nope. jerry read your own sig!

Eynstyn · May 22, 2005, 11:45 PM

Only if my marriage was almost over anyway. I think I would rather just fool around and keep it secret.

Cadaver · May 23, 2005, 12:39 AM

Sure, I could. Why not? Sounds like fun... as long as all persons involved were agreeable to it, I see no harm in it.

Zimphire · May 23, 2005, 07:34 AM

Originally Posted by Cadaver

Sure, I could. Why not? Sounds like fun... as long as all persons involved were agreeable to it, I see no harm in it.

Ah you say that now. Till a week or so later you get into a argument then all of a sudden she pops the "Oh, you must hate me now, why don't you go over (Insert girls name you swapped) and have her take care of you? You seemed to like her more than me anyhow the other night"

More likely than not, this will happen.

:XI: · May 23, 2005, 07:52 AM

Originally Posted by JERRYJERRYJERRY

in the movie bob and carol and ted and alice they couldnt go through with it.

if you really loved another couple could you share a bed with them?

i dont think i could because it would be embarrassing if they werent pleasing to me or if they were overly pleasing to my spouse and we would have to stop our friendship.

what about you?

Depends, would I have to shtupp the guy too?

How about we just go for Rita, Sue & Bob too.?

Big Mac · May 23, 2005, 07:55 AM

Right, is it not inevitable that most all such relationships will end destructively? I would not be able to stomach the thought of my GF or wife engaging in intimate relations with another.

:XI: · May 23, 2005, 07:56 AM

Originally Posted by Big Mac

Right, is it not inevitable that most all such relationships will end destructively? I would not be able to stomach the thought of my GF or wife engaging in intimate relations with another.

Another wife? That's HOT!

- - e r i k - - · May 23, 2005, 08:06 AM

Nah. Threesomes are more than enough for me.

Yes. with two females.

ManOfSteal · May 23, 2005, 08:20 AM

This thread has me hot & bothered.

wolfen · May 23, 2005, 01:16 PM

No...because my Dad said it was a big mistake.

historylme · May 23, 2005, 01:17 PM

Originally Posted by ManOfSteal

This thread has me hot & bothered.

Isn't that always the case?

wdlove · May 23, 2005, 01:51 PM

No, it is just morally wrong. When a man leaves his parents and marries a wife they be come one flesh.

Weyland-Yutani · May 23, 2005, 02:02 PM

No, never. When I commit to a woman I do so heart and soul, body and spirit. It can't be shared. It is wrong. As is adultery. It corrodes the soul.

cheers

W-Y

Millennium · May 23, 2005, 03:17 PM

I'd like to think that I respect my marriage more than to undermine it like this, and I'd certainly hope that I respect my friends enough not to undermine their marriages in this way.

Randman · May 23, 2005, 03:20 PM

I think the majority of the people making wisecracks aren't even dating much less being married.

DeathMan · May 23, 2005, 03:34 PM

Religious beliefs aside (I'm with WD on this one) I think it would be a strain on a relationship to do this type of thing. Monogamy is so ingrained in our culture, even if you think you can handle the idea of someone else being intimate with your wife, you probably can't. I wouldn't even consider it. I know there are people out there that do it, though. Different folks, I guess.

Shaddim · May 23, 2005, 03:45 PM

I can't imagine it (though I do have friends who have tried it). Having more than 1 spouse is hard enough, making sure attention is distributed equally. Actually dealing with another couple and their egos, desires, and expectations would be very emotionally taxing. I've never seen a healthy marriage survive it.

goMac · May 23, 2005, 03:57 PM

Why would you?

MilkmanDan · May 23, 2005, 04:10 PM

eh, whatever works.

turtle777 · May 23, 2005, 05:07 PM

Originally Posted by MilkmanDan

eh, whatever works.

But it doesn't.

-t

ASIMO · May 23, 2005, 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by turtle777

But it doesn't.

-t

And you know this to always be the case because...?

Or are you limiting your response to regard only those in the Occident? And even then, how do you know?

turtle777 · May 23, 2005, 05:21 PM

Originally Posted by ASIMO

And you know this to always be the case because...?
Or are you limiting your response to regard only those in the Occident? And even then, how do you know?

Common sense...

-t

ghporter · May 23, 2005, 06:27 PM

How many people posting on this thread can honestly say that they truly understand their mate? That they know what's going on inside her/his mind at any given time? That they even are capable of fully, honestly, and openly communicating their thoughts and emotions at all times within the framework of their current relationship?

I'm counting hands....

OK, time's up, and the three hands I saw were bluffing.

My wife and I have lived together for over 26 years, and I sure can't say "yes" to all of my questions above. Further, we're both professionally trained communicators, both very honest with each other, and both madly in love with each other. With all of that going for us, we still have "issues" from time to time.

The problem with the idea of a "spouce swapping" situation is not just that one or another spouce in the arrangement may or may not feel spurned, or that there's a lot of baggage involved, but piled on top of all that is the part about learning all about another person, their likes and interests, etc. And I'm just talking about bed here-a broader relationship would be vastly more complex. I think it would be far more honest to consider something other than "swapping," such as putting both couples together in the same room. At least there wouldn't be any questions about what happened!

Personally, sex is far too special and important to me to even consider it with someone I wasn't extremely emotionally intimate with. The emotional aspect makes the physical aspect so much better, that it's hard to imagine anything like a "one night stand."

So I guess the answer I'd give is a resounding "NO!"

nredman · May 23, 2005, 07:45 PM

spouse swapping? ummm no, why even get married if you want to go screw other women? just stay single and you can swap women all the time,

Cadaver · May 23, 2005, 08:31 PM

Originally Posted by Zimphire

Ah you say that now. Till a week or so later you get into a argument then all of a sudden she pops the "Oh, you must hate me now, why don't you go over (Insert girls name you swapped) and have her take care of you? You seemed to like her more than me anyhow the other night"

More likely than not, this will happen.

You are 100% correct, for most people that is.

There are couples who are able to do this kind of thing and not let the situation you describe happen. They are few and far between, I will grant you that. Not sayin' that about my marriage, but just sayin'... that's all.

I know this because I know a married couple that swap. They've been married 11 years, and still going strong. They don't swap with close friends of theirs - they keep both "worlds" as separate as possible.

While I believe that I could keep any "emotion" out of it, I don't believe my wife could; what you describe Zimph would absolutely happen to her.

ASIMO · May 23, 2005, 09:26 PM

Originally Posted by turtle777

Common sense...

-t

Your common sense fails you. Try logic and probability.

There is a whole world that you apparently are not aware of or are inclined to disregard due to whatever reason -- a world which the internet has greatly facilitated. Most fail, some succeed. More power to them. Live and let live. No pushers allowed.

MallyMal · May 23, 2005, 09:26 PM

Is this the same as swinging or is swinging considered a different...ummm...genre? If it is considered different, what is the difference?

Eynstyn · May 23, 2005, 09:55 PM

Originally Posted by MallyMal

Is this the same as swinging or is swinging considered a different...ummm...genre? If it is considered different, what is the difference?

I know a girl who invited me to a swingers place and we had a good time there. There were married couples there and singles too.

Then a few years later I answered a personals ad and went to a nice couples home and performed on the wife while the hubby watched. It was wierd and I decided I wouldn't do it if I got married.

Somehow the idea of cheating seems better. If I was going to sleep outside the marriage.

nredman · May 24, 2005, 04:49 PM

Originally Posted by Eynstyn

Then a few years later I answered a personals ad and went to a nice couples home and performed on the wife while the hubby watched. It was wierd and I decided I wouldn't do it if I got married.
.

if your sex life sucks that bad that you have to have another guy bang your wife to get off, i feel bad for that guy and you for that matter. no offense

turtle777 · May 24, 2005, 07:13 PM

Originally Posted by ASIMO

Your common sense fails you. Try logic and probability.

Pfff, that's the problem today. People even exclude logic and probability from common sense. No wonder...

-t

James L · May 24, 2005, 09:51 PM

I couldn't do it, my wifey couldn't either. We enjoy the close bond we share, and have no desire to share it with anyone else.

Having said that, my best friend and his wife swing, and have done so for well over a decade. They are completely in love, and there is no chance that their relationship suffers.

I used to disagree with it and lecture him, but then I realized that I was simply imposing MY morals, and the way I feel in MY relationship, on him and his lady.

The simple truth of the matter is they are open and honest, and no one is getting hurt. They hold hands in public, argue no more than any other married couple, lead professional lives, etc.

Don't believe that some people can't make it work, because many can... even though I am not one of them!

Cody Dawg · May 24, 2005, 11:28 PM

Only if the "other woman" was Halle Berry or Angelina Jolie.

They're both pretty hot.

(Just joking...they are hot, but I wouldn't invite them into my marriage.)

ASIMO · May 25, 2005, 01:54 AM

Originally Posted by turtle777

Pfff, that's the problem today. People even exclude logic and probability from common sense. No wonder...

-t

Your sarcasm reveals some truth, probably unwittingly so.

Try to keep your own hang ups/prejudices/preconceptions out and go with cold logic and probability, and you will likely see how some of these relationships may actually not only work but work well. Stick your little head out of that vast shell of yours once in a while. Evidence surrounds you.

demograph68 · May 25, 2005, 02:51 AM

Originally Posted by wdlove

No, it is just morally wrong. When a man leaves his parents and marries a wife they be come one flesh.

Like conjoined twins? How is that possible?

long live the new flesh! - Videodrome

Eynstyn · May 25, 2005, 10:58 PM

Originally Posted by nredman

if your sex life sucks that bad that you have to have another guy bang your wife to get off, i feel bad for that guy and you for that matter. no offense

No offense taken. Which one a those philospher guys talked about the unexplored life an how it was a piss poor one?

I did the things I was curious about. Almost like you bein curious about takin the cat photo in night vision mode. If that'sas close as you get to taking wild life photos i feel bad for you.

No offense.

Paco500 · May 25, 2005, 11:10 PM

I know for me and my wife it would never, never work. I have no idea if she could handle me with another woman (i seriously doubt it) but I am 100% sure I could not handle her with another man.

qnxde · May 26, 2005, 12:27 AM

When my ex and I were still together we used to engage in the occasional threesome, and watching him with another guy used to kinda turn me on. (breakup totally non related to any of that)

Zimphire · May 26, 2005, 07:15 AM

Originally Posted by demograph68

long live the new flesh! - Videodrome

That was a messed up movie. Remember seeing it in the 80s.

Debbie Harry is a freak.