[sek929]

Originally Posted by Dakarʒ 

Though they would be tainted, as this is the internet and we are all pale friendless virgins living in our mothers' basements.

my mom has a finished basement......

[Chuckit]

The creep factor of this thread is absolutely delicious. And I love the fact that the best way to troll Shifuimam is to say nice things about her.

[sek929]

Since half the posters in this thread would totally date her we need to start a NN reality show.

[RAILhead]

Am I the one that started all the weirdness? Be honest...

[shifuimam]

I'm still wondering how we got on the creepy topic of me. Why would anyone in this forum not want to talk about something related to sex? I mean, copulation's got to be a lot more interesting than talking about my face...

<edit>I don't know how many 'NNers would actually date me...I am a Windows user, after all.</edit>

[sek929]

We'd always have the high ground in any argument at least

[Chuckit]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

I don't know how many 'NNers would actually date me...I am a Windows user, after all.

Eh, Windows girls are easy. You always have an in fixing their damn shitty PCs.

[sek929]

You could help her defrag in more than one way.

I understand that makes no sense

[scaught]

Oh baby. I'll move your pagefile.sys to a separate HD and have your performance increased by 4%. Awwwwwwww yea.

[Chuckit]

Let's just say I've done my share of hard drive mounting and fscking in my time.

[shifuimam]

Geek innuendo is the only real innuendo there is.

I LOLed.

[- - e r i k - -]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

And one thing I find interesting is that nobody under the age of 30 seems to find me at all attractive. I'm only 23, so you can see the slight hiccup there.

Have you ever considered that low self-esteem is even less attractive than what you perceive as being physically unattractive*?


* which you are not the slightest

[Laminar]

Originally Posted by - - e r i k - - 

Have you ever considered that low self-esteem is even less attractive than what you perceive as being physically unattractive*?

Bingo.

[shifuimam]

You assume I've always had low self-esteem. Such is not the case. I felt pretty confident about myself all through college (and I only graduated in 2006, so it wasn't that long ago), and all it did was allow people to make fun of me for having confidence in myself when I really shouldn't have.

And note that someone can't look at me sitting at Starbucks or something and think "ZOMG low self-esteem she's not pretty on the inside"... I'm aware that body language can convey some of how one feels on the inside, but we all know that's not the only reason most people find me unattractive....

[Chuckit]

Do people look at you in Starbucks and decide you're unattractive? (I usually just go there to get coffee. And only if I'm really desperate for caffeine.)

[shifuimam]

I'm just saying that when random people see me, they don't find me to be attractive. It's just how it is. I doubt it's just because I don't like how I look, either.

[iMOTOR]

I'm 23.

You'll have to take my word for it; but when I saw the photo RailHead posted, I assumed it was a photo of some hottie he found on google images or something. I didn't think the picture could be of you because I remember some thread you posted in a while back where you mentioned that you were unattractive.

I'm really sorry you're surrounded by fools who have no idea what an attractive woman looks like.


BTW,

if you're ever in SoCal, I'd be happy to show you around, buy you dinner, take you to a concert.

Just keep in mind; I don't put out until there's talk of marriage. Sorry.

[Shaddim]

Here's a fun experiment, go to a Starbucks or some other coffee place where college kids hang out and see if anyone tries to spark up a conversation, just take a book and hang out for a couple hours. The next day, go to a salon/spa and get a complete makeover; face, fingernails, hair, pedicure, wax, etc.. Maybe get a new blouse and/or skirt too.

After that, go to the same coffee place and read for another 2 hours and see what happens.

You go from:



to



and guys would go from to . Most of it is due to how you feel about yourself, but it never hurts to knock their socks off too. If someone didn't chat you up in <30 min, I'd be shocked. I know if I were your age I would.

Of course, I'm not saying that you're unattractive now, you've got lots of cuteness, but I can see some "Ackerness" dying to come out in those pics you've posted.

[abe]

Originally Posted by RAILhead 

It all boils down to each his/her own. While Lam's gals isn't ugly per se, based on the pics of the ladies we've had the honor of discussing, I must say that if seen in the real world, I would be more interested in our very own shifuimam. She has much prettier hair, a much cuter smile, and since I can't see Lam's gal's legs, I'll default to shi's nice, curvy legs (I'm a curvy calf guy, what can I say?).

There's nothing wrong with accepting compliments, even though you may disagree with them. I was dolling them out to you simply because that's what I think -- to me, you're attractive. I wasn't trying to be a twit or a smartass, I was just complimenting you.

How would you know? The pic of shifuimam is verrrrrry small, her features are obscured, she's wearing a cap and shades and the photog is standing on the North Rim of the Canyon, it seems.

shifuimam, let's see your best picture.

[shifuimam]

Originally Posted by Shaddim 

Here's a fun experiment, go to a Starbucks or some other coffee place where college kids hang out and see if anyone tries to spark up a conversation, just take a book and hang out for a couple hours. The next day, go to a salon/spa and get a complete makeover; face, fingernails, hair, pedicure, wax, etc.. Maybe get a new blouse and/or skirt too.

After that, go to the same coffee place and read for another 2 hours and see what happens.

...

Most of it is due to how you feel about yourself, but it never hurts to knock their socks off too. If someone didn't chat you up in <30 min, I'd be shocked. I know if I were your age I would.

Of course, I'm not saying that you're unattractive now, you've got lots of cuteness, but I can see some "Ackerness" dying to come out in those pics you've posted.

Again, assuming I've never done such a thing. Not necessarily trolled a coffee shop for a few hours, but I've done the whole fake nails, makeup, $75 haircut-and-brow-wax deal. Shock of all shocks, it didn't really make a difference in people noticing or not noticing me.

People don't believe me when I say that I don't have whatever it is that girls have to that gets guys' attention. I apparently wasn't born with that particular gene.

Originally Posted by abe 

How would you know? The pic of shifuimam is verrrrrry small, her features are obscured, she's wearing a cap and shades and the photog is standing on the North Rim of the Canyon, it seems.

Exactly. I could look like a troll for all you people know.

shifuimam, let's see your best picture.

You should be able to anticipate my answer on this one...it doesnt' exist. Ahahaha. No, really. There are a bunch of pics of me on my Flickr account. They all suck.

Send Railroader out to stalk me so I can prove I'm right.

[abe]

Originally Posted by BlueSky 

Ah, the famous Michelin Bullshit Year. What a load of bullshit that was.

[tavilach]

Alright. Wow.

I thought I was ugly for a long time. I'm not ugly, though. It's amazing what a little bit of care and confidence did for me, and it's surprising how easy it is to get the wrong impression about how you look.

I'm confused, though. shifuimam, you say that you had confidence until guys told you that you looked ugly? That doesn't really make sense to me. Can you elaborate on what guys have actually said to you?

[- - e r i k - -]

Care and confidence makes any person look good. Well, except maybe for Brian Peppers.

[brassplayersrock²]

you're cute! deal with it

[paul w]

I'm going to go against the current and say that you might just photograph cute, considering what I've seen so far. But it makes me think about my brief foray into the world of internet dating - how many girls did I find cute from their photos only to meet them and find...

Well their photos may have even been spot on, but there was some detail that didn't come through. One had a freakishly large forehead. Another had the most ditsurbing voice. Yet another was downright miserable and fidgety. There were one or two other with details that proably coudln't be mentioned here on a family-type forum but I think the point is clear. Maybe shifuiman knows what she's talking about.

Then again, my own true love refuses to believe me when I insist that she's the most beautiful woman in the whole entire universe. It's kind of frustrating really...

[shifuimam]

You (erik and tavliach) are both are fruits.

I didn't have confidence at all when I was in high school. Then I did when I was in college. Then I realized I was making a fool of myself, so I quit trying to be some pretty/beautiful/attractive person when I'm just not.

That brings us to the present. Guys haven't been cruel enough to tell flat-out that I'm unattractive, but the number of times I've been blatantly rejected by them pretty much takes care of that. If guys in real life were ever attracted to me (I mean stable, normal guys - not creepy stalker types who get obsessed with any girl who looks at them twice), I might have a different opinon of myself, but as it stands, the only guys who have ever been attracted to me only know me on the intarnets. That says a lot about me, IMO.

<edit>I think Paul W has it figured out. There are all kinds of defects that become apparent when you see me IRL.</edit>

[brassplayersrock²]

after reading that shuif all i can see from you is this:


*runs and hides*

ps
you're still a cutie

[tavilach]

Fine, I'm a fruit. Thanks?

[shifuimam]

Jesus that is a fracking horrible picture of me. I look like a demon or a vampire or something.

[abe]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

You (erik and tavliach) are both are fruits.

I didn't have confidence at all when I was in high school. Then I did when I was in college. Then I realized I was making a fool of myself, so I quit trying to be some pretty/beautiful/attractive person when I'm just not.

That brings us to the present. Guys haven't been cruel enough to tell flat-out that I'm unattractive, but the number of times I've been blatantly rejected by them pretty much takes care of that. If guys in real life were ever attracted to me (I mean stable, normal guys - not creepy stalker types who get obsessed with any girl who looks at them twice), I might have a different opinon of myself, but as it stands, the only guys who have ever been attracted to me only know me on the intarnets. That says a lot about me, IMO.

<edit>I think Paul W has it figured out. There are all kinds of defects that become apparent when you see me IRL.</edit>

Could it be you weren't meant to be pablum, or one size fits all?

What if you had a specific purpose and destiny that only someone with the right Yin to your Yang and your Yang to his Yin would find to be a fit?

That might not help a young woman's natural yearnings to be found attractive by all the young men, but it would ensure that she would soon learn discernment in matters of the heart.

There is much to be said for the woman who can avoid being detoured or waylaid by those of baser motives.

You might appeal to more sophisticated tastes. Not that chronology, alone, would make the difference.

[shifuimam]

The idea that there is a single right person for each other person on the planet is romantic and poetic, but utterly ridiculous. There are more than six billion people on this planet. You seriously think that only one of them is actually "right for me", and if I don't happen to meet that one person in a 1:6,000,000,000 chance, I'm f!cked for the rest of my life? Gee, that's encouraging.

And it doesn't really matter if there was something non-physical about me that someone liked. You still have to be physically attractive to get someone's attention.

[abe]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

You (erik and tavliach) are both are fruits.

I didn't have confidence at all when I was in high school. Then I did when I was in college. Then I realized I was making a fool of myself, so I quit trying to be some pretty/beautiful/attractive person when I'm just not.

That brings us to the present. Guys haven't been cruel enough to tell flat-out that I'm unattractive, but the number of times I've been blatantly rejected by them pretty much takes care of that. If guys in real life were ever attracted to me (I mean stable, normal guys - not creepy stalker types who get obsessed with any girl who looks at them twice), I might have a different opinon of myself, but as it stands, the only guys who have ever been attracted to me only know me on the intarnets. That says a lot about me, IMO.

<edit>I think Paul W has it figured out. There are all kinds of defects that become apparent when you see me IRL.</edit>

Your ability to think and to speak your mind may be what culls the riff raff you'd innocently wish were attracted.

[abe]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

The idea that there is a single right person for each other person on the planet is romantic and poetic, but utterly ridiculous. There are more than six billion people on this planet. You seriously think that only one of them is actually "right for me", and if I don't happen to meet that one person in a 1:6,000,000,000 chance, I'm f!cked for the rest of my life? Gee, that's encouraging.

And it doesn't really matter if there was something non-physical about me that someone liked. You still have to be physically attractive to get someone's attention.

P.S. Quit using flowery sentences. It's annoying.

Well, I wouldn't say there's ONLY one.

But you do have a unique way of probing people.

[Captain Obvious]

Originally Posted by tavilach 

Alright. Wow.

I thought I was ugly for a long time. I'm not ugly, though, and in the past year I've been complimented on my looks a lot. It's amazing what a little bit of care and confidence did for me,

aren't you that guy with the unibrow?
I think those compliments were tongue in cheek

[paul w]

Eh, abe's a little much, but if you filter it down a bit you get that eventually, somebody's going to fall for you and you them, and everything will be right in the universe. You'll feel pretty, just like that chick from West Side Story.

Just don't f*ck everything up by not putting out.

Aaaaaaaaaand we're back to the OT.

[Timo]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

That brings us to the present. Guys haven't been cruel enough to tell flat-out that I'm unattractive, but the number of times I've been blatantly rejected by them pretty much takes care of that.

As they say in finance, "past performance is no guarantee of future results."

If guys in real life were ever attracted to me (I mean stable, normal guys - not creepy stalker types who get obsessed with any girl who looks at them twice), I might have a different opinon of myself, but as it stands, the only guys who have ever been attracted to me only know me on the intarnets. That says a lot about me, IMO.

Why would or should a normal guy be attracted to someone who doesn't think she's special or pretty?

<edit>I think Paul W has it figured out. There are all kinds of defects that become apparent when you see me IRL.</edit>

I doubt the defect is on the exterior. What would you lose by trying an attitude change?

[tavilach]

Originally Posted by Timo 

Why would or should a normal guy be attracted to someone who doesn't think she's special or pretty?

QFT.

[shifuimam]

Originally Posted by paul w 

Eh, abe's a little much, but if you filter it down a bit you get that eventually, somebody's going to fall for you and you them, and everything will be right in the universe. You'll feel pretty, just like that chick from West Side Story.

Oh, that's such a load of bullshit. I personally know multiple people in their 50s who still haven't met anyone who's really been into them. Sure, they've found a way to make their life meaningful enough without ever being able to share it with someone, but I can guarantee you it still sucks for them.

And this isn't about me meeting or not meeting "that special someone". It's about the basic idea that some people just aren't attractive IRL, no matter what the intarwebs say.

Just don't f*ck everything up by not putting out.

Aaaaaaaaaand we're back to the OT.

That made me LOL.

<edit>And on this whole "change your attitude and you'll magically be pretty" line...been there, done that, got the t-shirt, took it off, didn't make a difference. I'm surprised at how hard it is to get anyone to believe me on this.</edit>

[- - e r i k - -]

There are always people who are more compatible with each other than others. Daft bimbos get along with other daft bimbos. Geeks get along with geeks. Ugly people with...well, you get my point.

No matter what, there will always be someone out there that's "right" for you and will make you happy. And it will probably happen to you regardless of your attitude - but more likely than not it will be a barrier for you to actually meet these people.

Self-esteem CAN be helped. It really is all about attitude - and a better attitude will make you more attractive. You'll keep yourself better, be more open and in turn become more physically attractive as well. A frown and an emo "woe is me" attitude is definitely not attractive.

These are the facts. Deal with them as you like.

[shifuimam]

I can't honestly say that there is "someone for everyone". It just doesn't always happen. Sure, it's only a small minority of the population who never find anyone (and not just due to some BS self-esteem issue), but it does happen.

Just sayin'.

And I don't go through life with "a frown and a woe is me attitude". At all. I'm having a shitty day today and that's reflected in what I've said here - sorry about that. I'm fine with being unattractive. It's the hand I was dealt. That's life.

[abe]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

I can't honestly say that there is "someone for everyone". It just doesn't always happen. Sure, it's only a small minority of the population who never find anyone (and not just due to some BS self-esteem issue), but it does happen.

Just sayin'.

And I don't go through life with "a frown and a woe is me attitude". At all. I'm having a shitty day today and that's reflected in what I've said here - sorry about that. I'm fine with being unattractive. It's the hand I was dealt. That's life.

So what is your rule of thumb about putting out?

[shifuimam]

Who, me? When I was in college and a total hornball, you might get lucky on the first date (or at least get your hand down my pants).

Now, the odds of you ever getting some from me are slim to none.

[brassplayersrock²]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

<edit>And on this whole "change your attitude and you'll magically be pretty" line...been there, done that, got the t-shirt, took it off, didn't make a difference. I'm surprised at how hard it is to get anyone to believe me on this.</edit>

useless without pics!

how do you like them apples?!

[abe]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

Who, me? When I was in college and a total hornball, you might get lucky on the first date (or at least get your hand down my pants).

Now, the odds of you ever getting some from me are slim to none.

So, I'm curious, what prompted the thread?

BTW, I love the way you talk!

[brassplayersrock²]

so, i'm curious as well, who hurt you so much to make you think that you're not attractive? you can PM me if you want to. I'm good with talking to people about things

[besson3c]

Originally Posted by ShortcutToMoncton 

The end. Stop being weird.

Are you addressing me with that?

[CreepDogg]

OK, so I'm old and married so kick me out of this thread if you like. There's really no point in me commenting on the OT.

About 90% of what makes someone attractive is what they do with what they've got. It really is in how you carry yourself. It's also a cliche, but true, that attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder. Hell, go look at the hot babes pic orgy thread (at your own risk!) -- for a lot of the posts, there's someone saying 'Oh, she's not hot'. Different strokes for different folks.

Shifuimam - if you've been there, done that, bought the t-shirt - buy a different t-shirt. Maybe it will fit better. Maybe something wasn't just right about the last one. No reason to pack it in. I'm quite certain you have a lot to offer.

Oh - and just for the record on the age thing - it can work. I met my wife when I was 30 and she was 20. She would not have given me the time of day if I was as I'd been when I was 20, and it worked for us, and still very much does. Now she's 29 and I'm still 30!

[abe]

These women are perfect????







I say it's all makeup, hairdressing and attitude.

[Railroader]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

Send Railroader out to stalk me so I can prove I'm right.

Huh?

[invisibleX]

Originally Posted by shifuimam 

No, I was just saying that I'm not attractive (at all) in real life. If I looked half as attractive as Princess Di, you can bet your ass I'd be happily raking in the compliments.

I don't think you, or anyone for that matter, is in a position to say whether they are attractive. By definition finding yourself attractive or not is irrelevant. Heck most people lean towards self-deprecating (thats not what it is, but its a fun word) because it is much more socially risky to be confident of your good looks.

We think you look good. You look good. Our motives are about as pure as you can get (none of us have a bats chance in hell of sleeping with you) and we don't personally know you so we have very little bias. You however are rolling in a big pile of bias (had a bad day, clearly somewhat depressed right now, who really thinks "man is my day has been ****.. but I look damn fine). My sister is the same way in fact.

Anyhow, sooner you realize beauty isn't what you think of yourself but what other people think of you the happier you'll be and the less you'll care.

Also thank you Besson and Rail. Been having a shitty day myself but you both made me laugh out loud.