[brassplayersrock²]

Recently I over heard about how someone told a female co-worker "that if you have a problem with someone, then you should talk to that person." and that the female co-worker ran to the boss complaining, and that now the guy who gave her the advice is on the bosses "watch list"

I'm trying to wrap my mind around why her being given that advice would prompt her to go try to get the guy in trouble.

Any thoughts on the matter?
Also, how would you react if given that advice?
Thanks

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by brassplayersrock² 

Any thoughts on the matter?

Yes. Women are incompatible with the workplace.

(In general, of course. All the women here are lovely, sensible exceptions to this rule.)

[ShortcutToMoncton]

Wut?

[Dork.]

You just got put on my "watch list" for complaining about your co-workers online.

- Your Boss

[ghporter]

Part of Management 101 is to guide people you manage to resolve and eliminate problems, particularly personality conflicts, at the lowest level, i.e. "talk to each other." Of course this should be done appropriately, with the manager involved, but the process is appropriate anywhere. If you have a problem interacting with a coworker, the manager should know about it, but adults handle things like this themselves, without need for a playground monitor to intercede.

Was the advice "you should talk to the guy" or "have you talked to the guy about this?" It kind of makes a difference, and knowing the context of the issue makes a big difference too. Was it some sort of behavior that could be considered harassment? Was it office politics? If it was on the order of "he takes my stapler without asking and never brings it back," that's one thing. If it's "he never delivers his part of the project, which puts me behind and makes me look bad," that's another.

Finally, what sort of "watch list" is this anyway? Supervisors who have "lists" are to be watched themselves. It sounds like the female coworker brought up an issue, maybe just in front of the guy, maybe directly to him, so if that's the case, why should she "run to the boss?" Or is this workplace actually more of a grade school playground instead of an adult workplace?

[Cold Warrior]

If an employee solicited advice from a coworker and then complained about it to the boss, I as the boss would be suspicious of the employee not the coworker. Seems like a values or judgement deficiency. But if the coworker has a history of butting in and trying to own every office issue, I'd want to speak to him about boundaries.

If the boss or the work environment is so lousy as to need a watch list, there's little that advice guy can do except apologize for a misunderstanding then start looking for a new job.

[turtle777]

Shot-the-messenger-syndrome.

The "boss" in that case is probably an insecure person.

-t

[Railroader]

Originally Posted by brassplayersrock² 

Any thoughts on the matter?
Also, how would you react if given that advice?
Thanks

The boss is incompetent. Which is probably why there are problems at that workplace.

If I was talking to someone about I problem I had with someone else entirely, I think that person is within rights to punch me in the face and take away my man card.

But how would I react to someone telling me to talk to the person I had problems with? I'd probably go "Duh, [smacks self on forehead] you are right."

[subego]

There's too much missing context.

From what you've said, my best guess is the female co-worker has had a problem with the advice giver since before this incident.

She was trying to address this, and the advice giver responded with advice to do exactly what she was doing, rather than listen to the problem she was trying to present.

That's irritating and obnoxious, so she went "suck it, *********. I'm taking this upstairs".