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SUBGENIUS · Sep 17, 2003, 05:49 AM

Hi,

I need to learn how to smoke, I'm doing it all wrong, and know it. Here's what I do just now. I take a puff on the ciggie, I feel my cheeks suckign in as I draw on it, and up to this point, I'm not inhaling, or taking any smoke into my throat and down to my lungs. Once I've finished drawing on it, I then try to inhale it, like moving it down my throat into my chest, but I'm sure this is the wrong way, since I don't seem to get a hit off it.
Should I be inhaling as I take a draw of the fag itself?
A simple a-z on how to smoke would be greatly appreciated
Hel

nbnz · Sep 17, 2003, 05:52 AM

"SUBGENIUS" is right!

tintub · Sep 17, 2003, 05:56 AM

lol I really hope this is a joke!

SUBGENIUS · Sep 17, 2003, 06:01 AM

Hey, hold on, I am serious. It is legal to smoke, and I think I'm doing it all wrong, so just want to be careful not to damage my throat by doing it wrong, and want to smoke properly to get the biggest hit from it.

- - e r i k - - · Sep 17, 2003, 06:09 AM

*Moron of the day*

Diggory Laycock · Sep 17, 2003, 06:48 AM

Originally posted by SUBGENIUS:
... just want to be careful not to damage my throat by doing it wrong...

Ah - I see all those cases of Tounge/Throat/Mouth cancer are all caused by mis-smoking.

p.s. I am a hypocrite (about this).

Cubeoid · Sep 17, 2003, 07:32 AM

Call the customer service number on the cigarette box you purchased. If you're lucky they'll send you an instructional video.

version · Sep 17, 2003, 07:42 AM

Don't listen to anyone else here, remember, on the packs it says, 'Smoking can harm your baby', well, I'm a guy, and... I can't have babies, so I guess smoking is ok for me.

LOL

catsank · Sep 17, 2003, 08:57 AM

Smoking is one of the many freedoms society allows it's corporate wolves to use in order
to prey on the sad and weak.

voyageur · Sep 17, 2003, 08:58 AM

My mother and her sister and her mother:

when the 3 of them were together, people assumed her sister was her mother. Why? She was the life-long smoker, which had aged her skin years beyond that of her own mother's.

designbc · Sep 17, 2003, 09:03 AM

Originally posted by SUBGENIUS:
Hey, hold on, I am serious. It is legal to smoke, and I think I'm doing it all wrong, so just want to be careful not to damage my throat by doing it wrong, and want to smoke properly to get the biggest hit from it.

You are right, you should take care of your throat, since your brain is already damaged.

signal68 · Sep 17, 2003, 10:24 AM

Yes. Smoking cigarettes is incredibly, incredibly stupid. In fact, I'm on a campaign to piss of smokers who offend me, because I'm sick of taking their crap. Walk along and count the cigarette butts you see strewn about. It's disgusting.

Anyway, smoking OTHER things is alright.

- Ca$h

waxcrash · Sep 17, 2003, 10:49 AM

Originally posted by signal68:
Anyway, smoking OTHER things is alright.

- Ca$h

mydog8mymac · Sep 17, 2003, 11:01 AM

Wow! I'm agreeing with Ca$h on both statements!

Smokers are the only group who are still politically safe to bash.

Cipher13 · Sep 17, 2003, 11:34 AM

Practice makes perfect?

palmberg · Sep 17, 2003, 11:42 AM

Originally posted by signal68:
Anyway, smoking OTHER things is alright.

- Ca$h

Like pole, in Ca$h's case.

Zimphire · Sep 17, 2003, 11:52 AM

Originally posted by signal68:
Yes. Smoking cigarettes is incredibly, incredibly stupid. In fact, I'm on a campaign to piss of smokers who offend me, because I'm sick of taking their crap. Walk along and count the cigarette butts you see strewn about. It's disgusting.

Anyway, smoking OTHER things is alright.

- Ca$h

I had to use this, one more time.

subego · Sep 17, 2003, 12:05 PM

Originally posted by SUBGENIUS:
and want to smoke properly to get the biggest hit from it.

That's your problem right there. You take a drag off a cigarette.

Silly rabbit. Hits are for joints.

d0ubled0wn · Sep 17, 2003, 12:11 PM

Just grab the fag by the butt, then suck on it.

Ozmodiar · Sep 17, 2003, 12:22 PM

Originally posted by d0ubled0wn:
Just grab the fag by the butt, then suck on it.

priceless.

sniffer · Sep 17, 2003, 12:23 PM

As long as smoking cigarettes is all legal, I don't see why there should be a problem with it. Just practice now and then, and in a few weeks you'll be hooked. Good luck.

derbs · Sep 17, 2003, 12:38 PM

"I smoke uh ... if this bothers anyone I would recommend you look around the world in which we live........

and shut your ****ing mouth.

Either that or suffer a facial burn. Your choice...

I now realize I smoke for simply one reason -

and that is spite.

I hate you non-smokers with all of my little black ****ing heart.

You obnoxious, self righteous whining little ****s. My biggest fear if I quit smoking is that I'll become one of you.

Okay, non-smokers this message is for you and you only:

Non smokers die everyday

Sleep tight.

You see, I know you entertain some type of eternal life fantasy because you do not smoke cigarettes... May I be the first to:

POP

that little ****ing bubble of yours and send you hurdling back to the truth?

You're dead too.

hehahhehhe.... "

Bill Hicks
http://www.genkigirl.org/speakeasy/bill_hicks.html

bkatran · Sep 17, 2003, 12:45 PM

How to smoker properly

Stradlater · Sep 17, 2003, 12:47 PM

So the guy wants to smoke, he probably knows it's harmful, preaching you guys, complain if he goes over to your house and blows smoke in your face, sure, but you don't know his habits.

Oh: and can you let us know why you're taking up cigarettes? Why not cigars or pipe tobacco? You're not apt to get addicted to those.

SUBGENIUS · Sep 17, 2003, 01:03 PM

Wow, I only asked how to smoke, and I get all this. Thank you to to the few that actually responded with help, I do already smoke, and only wnated pointers on how to do it properly, not a health lesson, or being called a moron (ty Eric). I've been smoking for years, but everyone says I blow most of it out, so I must be doing something wrong. I used to smoke joints, so know what the hit from them is like, but wouldn't mind grabbing that ol' fag and smoking it right.
But, thanks for the help.

malvolio · Sep 17, 2003, 01:08 PM

As a smoker with decades of experience, I can answer your question.
Tobacco - suck it into your mouth, then inhale into your lungs. If it doesn't feel like you're getting a "hit," switch to a stronger brand of cigarette.
Other substances - drag deep right into your lungs.
Aren't you glad you asked?

SUBGENIUS · Sep 17, 2003, 01:11 PM

Originally posted by malvolio:
As a smoker with decades of experience, I can answer your question.
Tobacco - suck it into your mouth, then inhale into your lungs. If it doesn't feel like you're getting a "hit," switch to a stronger brand of cigarette.
Other substances - drag deep right into your lungs.
Aren't you glad you asked?

Lol, I am now, think we could setup a smoker's lounge?

Thanks you for the help.

catsank · Sep 17, 2003, 01:15 PM

http://www.genkigirl.org/

Nice site, excellent word play from Ms. Robinson,
but like a lot of artist's, writers and especially comedians
- deeply bitter and at a loss with life and finding any
place or grounding within it...

Hick's quote - reminds me how much I liked him -
almost as much as I despised his ironies about smoking.
Roughing up christians is what christians expect, but
pro smoking - even if coated with irony is irresponsible.

It's not the dying - yes we all die, it's the 'how' we die,
and the loved ones who have to witness firsthand -
excruciatingly 'self inflicted' pain and misery.

Sherwin · Sep 17, 2003, 01:22 PM

Right then.
You're doing OK so far.

� Draw smoke from ciggie.
� Once smoke is in mouth, simultaneously remove ciggie from mouth and close lips.
� Open mouth slightly and draw air in, as if sucking teeth (but with teeth slightly ajar).
� Exhale when required.
� Repeat until ciggie is finished.
� When done, throw the butt on the ground so as to provide continued employment for the street cleaners.

IUJHJSDHE · Sep 17, 2003, 03:58 PM

Originally posted by SUBGENIUS:
Hey, hold on, I am serious. It is legal to smoke, and I think I'm doing it all wrong, so just want to be careful not to damage my throat by doing it wrong, and want to smoke properly to get the biggest hit from it.

I think you should be more worryed about damaging your throat by doing it, AT ALL.

In my opinion, it shouldn't be legal in the first place.

And by the way. This is a mac forum, you registered just to post this?

Lerkfish · Sep 17, 2003, 04:07 PM

I'm just sad that people choose to smoke. My father, god rest his soul, smoked 4 packs a day. He was never without a cigarette. He tried to stop countless times, but couldn't.
He would smoke while I was eating my cheerios. If there was ever a great incentive NOT to take up smoking, that would be it -- smoke-flavored cheerios.

I am a cancer survivor, but not a smoker. I had testicular cancer and had 24 lymph nodes removed from my abdomen in a brutal surgery I'd not wish on my worst enemy.
Why anyone would intentionally increase their risk, even a little bit, to get this horrible disease is beyond me.

I'm not judging so much as pitying smokers. There are so many other less harmful things to do with your life and your money.

talisker · Sep 17, 2003, 05:08 PM

Chill. I certainly wouldn't smoke, but if he wants to then let him do it. I'm sure a post saying "Anyone got any good doughnut recipes?", or "What's the best sort of beer?" or "Anyone know who makes the comfiest armchair and what's the best playstation game?" wouldn't get these sort of vitriolic replies, even though these would all imply the person is about to undertake some sort of activity that may increase their risk of cancer, heart disease, liver damage etc. Yet smoking always seems to bring out this "holier than thou" attitude.

I think the simple reason is that, unlike eating unhealthy food or not excercising much, if you don't smoke then it just doesn't hold any temptation for you, so it's easy to distance yourself from the smoker. It's impossible to imagine yourself in their shoes and therefore easier to paint what they're doing as a huge evil. I absolutely agree with moves to reduce the risk of passive smoking to others, but if an individual is aware of the health risks, but still wants to smoke, without inconveniencing others, then what business is it of yours?

nredman · Sep 17, 2003, 05:26 PM

Originally posted by - - e r i k - -:
*Moron of the day*

things · Sep 17, 2003, 05:33 PM

Originally posted by SUBGENIUS:
Wow, I only asked how to smoke, and I get all this. Thank you to to the few that actually responded with help, I do already smoke, and only wnated pointers on how to do it properly, not a health lesson, or being called a moron (ty Eric). I've been smoking for years, but everyone says I blow most of it out, so I must be doing something wrong. I used to smoke joints, so know what the hit from them is like, but wouldn't mind grabbing that ol' fag and smoking it right.
But, thanks for the help.

hey sub,

smoke it like a joint but don't hold the smoke in as long and you'll be okay.

Zimphire · Sep 17, 2003, 06:26 PM

Smoking is a blast. Esp when you wake up in the morning hocking up nasty phlegm that tastes like a mixture of snot and tar. Not to mention the fact that most food tastes like crap afterward.

Also, nicotine limits blood flow, if you know what I mean.

I started smoking when I was 17. Quit when I was 27. Haven't craved a cig since.

If you haven't started, don't. It's not a fun habit.

Esp with the price of cigs lately.

macvillage.net · Sep 17, 2003, 07:43 PM

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&i...=Google+Search

You ain't a bright guy eh?

If you have to ask how to do something stupid... that doesn't say much about you.

You found a Mac forum... so there is hope.

Exploit your Mac to make up for your shortcomings.

sniffer · Sep 17, 2003, 08:23 PM

Originally posted by macvillage.net:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&i...=Google+Search

You ain't a bright guy eh?

If you have to ask how to do something stupid... that doesn't say much about you.

You found a Mac forum... so there is hope.

Exploit your Mac to make up for your shortcomings.

You are taking this a little serious aren't you?

Zimphire · Sep 17, 2003, 08:28 PM

Yeah, I am sure being condescending towards him will change his mind.

That always works.

fireside · Sep 17, 2003, 08:28 PM

HOW TO SMOKE A FAG

Step One: Make sure you really want to start smoking fags.

Step Two: grab a handgun

Step Three: Point the handgun at your head

Step Four: Pull the trigger.

Congratulations, you have successfully smoked a fag!

Arkham_c · Sep 17, 2003, 09:58 PM

Smoking is darwinism in action. So I say, smoke on! Have you tried unfiltered? I also hear sticking your head over the bonfire is a real rush.

Ken Masters · Sep 17, 2003, 10:03 PM

Originally posted by fireside:
HOW TO SMOKE A FAG

Step One: Make sure you really want to start smoking fags.

Step Two: grab a handgun

Step Three: Point the handgun at your head

Step Four: Pull the trigger.

Congratulations, you have successfully smoked a fag!

HAHAHAHAHAHA

macvillage.net · Sep 17, 2003, 10:17 PM

Sniffing whiteout makes you cool.

Same with having unprotected sex with a prostitute.

(hey, lets encourage him. Sooner he's off the planet... sooner we free up some federal cash).

I would also recommend soliciting sex at an AIDS clinic.

ThinkInsane · Sep 17, 2003, 10:28 PM

Originally posted by macvillage.net:
Sniffing whiteout makes you cool.

Same with having unprotected sex with a prostitute.

(hey, lets encourage him. Sooner he's off the planet... sooner we free up some federal cash).

I would also recommend soliciting sex at an AIDS clinic.

Wow, that's some pretty blatant assholism there. Does this apply to everyone that smokes, this need to get them off the planet post-haste? What about people that smoke other substances? The potheads? How about Indians smoking peyote for their ceremonies? Do they need to hurry up and die too? Yeah, I agree smoking is pretty stupid. I'm a reformed smoker myself. I find it utterly disgusting, but I don't think that the people that do it don't deserve to live. I think some people are taking this a little too seriously. If you want to give the guy a hard time, do it about the proper thing: Not being able to figure out how to do something as simple as smoking. No reason to wish him harm, just a little gentle mocking is all that's required.

I think you need to take a deep breath of fresh. clean, smoke free air and chill out a little.

macvillage.net · Sep 17, 2003, 10:46 PM

The world is only so big.

If certain people *elect* to leave, or choose to take a chance on leaving...

Why not encourage it? Who loses? They do what they want, the rest get a benefit... there really isn't a disadvantage.

And smoking has been a pretty big part of my family. Both my grandfathers were told at one point in their lives "Stop smoking or you will not live to the end of the year". Both amazingly did quit.

My mother quit as well.

Still have family that smokes though.

Nicko · Sep 17, 2003, 11:00 PM

Originally posted by ThinkInsane:
Wow, that's some pretty blatant assholism there. Does this apply to everyone that smokes, this need to get them off the planet post-haste? What about people that smoke other substances? The potheads? How about Indians smoking peyote for their ceremonies? Do they need to hurry up and die too? Yeah, I agree smoking is pretty stupid. I'm a reformed smoker myself. I find it utterly disgusting, but I don't think that the people that do it don't deserve to live. I think some people are taking this a little too seriously. If you want to give the guy a hard time, do it about the proper thing: Not being able to figure out how to do something as simple as smoking. No reason to wish him harm, just a little gentle mocking is all that's required.

I think you need to take a deep breath of fresh. clean, smoke free air and chill out a little.

Hey, he is just telling the truth.

I'm guessing you haven't been lucky enough to hear an anti smoking speech from someone who is dying from lung cancer... fun stuff that is.

In conclusion, smokers do no deserve our respect for their harmful (to themselves and others) addiction.

sniffer · Sep 17, 2003, 11:19 PM

I feel this thread is so about to get smokinated.

NYCFarmboy · Sep 17, 2003, 11:21 PM

Ignoring all the moral crap being espoused here.

....

to the original thread...

try Menthols. Smoking menthol allows you to more deeply inhale the smoke and enjoy the nicotine buzz.

I don't smoke regularly, but LOVE to smoke an occasional menthol cigarette.

If you only smoke on occasion you will definately get "high" from smoking a full strength menthol cigarette.

Brands such as Newport and Kool are good menthols. Interestingly, those are the brands that Jackie Kennedy smoked when she was in the White House.

But...as in all things in life, I recommend moderation. If I buy a pack of cigarettes I only smoke one or two cigarettes and throw the rest away or give them away.

A cigarette should be a rare occasional thing enjoyed after a good meal, or with an adult beverage, or looking out over the ocean at sunset as the waves come in.

Face Ache · 03:43 AM

Smoking ***** you cool.*

I was a smoker and I was ****. **** I quit and **** my cool.

*** no attention to the ****** nerd/virgins here. They're just *******. Smoking gets you into the **** *****. Smoking gets you the *** girls. ******* makes you cool.

Sure it causes ****** too, but who gives a ****? Do you want to try to **** forever or do you want to **** Nicole Kidman silly and then share a ****-******* *************?

Hint: ****** lives forever.

***** your tits off. Knock ******** out. Just make sure you savour every ******.

If you stop enjoying ** then ****.

There. My *********** to MacNN for this week.

* Unless you're ****. Nobody likes an **** smoker.

Edit: Too many ******* **** words.

macvillage.net · Sep 17, 2003, 11:33 PM

Originally posted by Nicko:
Hey, he is just telling the truth.

I'm guessing you haven't been lucky enough to hear an anti smoking speech from someone who is dying from lung cancer... fun stuff that is.

In conclusion, smokers do no deserve our respect for their harmful (to themselves and others) addiction.

I take it you've seen it as well.

Cancer's a bitch regardless of what type. A good buddy of mine just got the enjoyment of watching his mother suffer for years.

it's miserable. It's rediculus.

If someone actually wants this... fine.

Just don't expect respect for that. To choose something that so many people suffer from is just rediculus. There are many as my friends mother, who did nothing to deserve it... and they still die. And people still don't think this is a problem.

Ken Masters · Sep 18, 2003, 05:51 AM

Originally posted by macvillage.net:
The world is only so big.

If certain people *elect* to leave, or choose to take a chance on leaving...

Why not encourage it? Who loses?................

Well ME!!!

I live in AUSTRALIA (we have universal health care

) and the government subsidises 3/4 of treatments and medicine for anyone who doesn't have private health insurance.

This means that my hard earned tax paying dollar$ are being spent on dorks that need very expensive medicine to stay alive, after volunteering to kill themselves every time they take a fag.

I�m pissed; this money could be going to people with legit illnesses!!!

I hope you get cancer in the EYE