I'm not unloyal or anything - I think it's probably the opposite that has got me so quagmired. But are the MacNN forums the most active (just the developer one)? I visit CocoaDev and cocoaDevcentral for tutorials, and I see alot of mailing lists (apple, cocabuilder), and some blogs too (redsweater, fishmeal, yadi yada). But those are either not interactive or (in the case of mailing lists) too obtuse, massive, and unusable (for me).
Where do you go when you have a question?