[Ghoser777]

So many of you probably know of my past issues with dating women. So just recently I ran into this one girl via eharmony who seemed perfect to date. We had a ton in common, liked to talk to each other, liked to do things together, etc. So we go out on three dates and I'm having a great time, we're talking everyday, etc. Now last night, we're talking on the phone and she drops my least favorite line from a female ever:

"Where do you see this going"

Of course, the implication there is that she wants to make clear to me a change of course (aka not continuing the dating relationship). My favorite line of the whole discussion is when she told me that she really was looking for someone when she went into eharmony, but after dating me she realized she'd be happier single. OUCH. Now I don't think she meant it to be as horrible as that sounded, but it was still a little painful if not comical. She told me everything that I already knew - how we were getting along great, we had fun hanging out, we had so much in common... aka, doesn't that mean we should date?

Sigh... she's had a rough past year or so, so I'm sure that has something to do with it. Plus she made a comment about how she thought dating me would be on the path toward marriage... which I think is half my problem. I'm nice, I have a good job, I'm responsible - aka, poor dating material. Would I be a good husband/father? Oh sure! But I guess I'll have to wait till I'm 30 till I can even date successfully.

So in short, I now hate women again.

[Severed Hand of Skywalker]

Time for gay

[DeathMan]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

Hey! Don't knock it till you....uh......nm

[E's Lil Theorem]

Relax, dude. No need for hate. Learn something from it instead. And keep trying. Eventually you'll find someone that sees things the way you do.

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

[Ghoser777]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

Man, if only I wasn't attracted to women...

[Patty]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

Yes, as a lady I know that men who are confident and gay about life are much more attractive than the gloomy types.

[Brass]

Originally Posted by Patty

Yes, as a lady I know that men who are confident and gay about life are much more attractive than the gloomy types.

[keyser_soze]

Get drunk and give her a booty call.
Or see if you can see each other on a strictly physical level. Since you get along so well, go to the clubs together. If neither of you hook up with someone, go home together. Good casual sex friends are highly underrated.

[ironknee]

don't rush it...how old are u? You have PLENTY of time and besides...as u said she just went through some bad stuff...that's a warning light for me because we all fell like we want to protect them form whatever...

good luck man

[Apple Pro Underwear]

Originally Posted by Ghoser777

So in short, I now hate women again.

i feel your pain bro

seriously, for the last year or so i have had it with their ****. they are just as bad if not worse than men. for the stupid cow that played all that head game shyt with me last year... F**K YOU BITCH! I HOPE YOU HOOK UP WITH SOME LOSER WHO DOESN"T GIVE A **** ABOUT YOU, HE PLAYS YOU OUT WHILE YOU'RE FALLING IN LOVE... JUST LIKE YOU WANTED! F**K YOU BITCH!
[/snorts coke]


ahhhh... anyway i'm not bitter.

[Captain Obvious]

I was going to make some off handed comment about how making a statement such as, "I hate women" just wreaks of a terribly unhealthy psychological state. Then I saw this:

Originally Posted by Ghoser777

So just recently I ran into this one girl via eharmony who seemed perfect to date.

WTF is wrong with you people who think internet dating is normal and acceptable?
Honestly, I could never lower my self-esteem so low that I would use a dating site. Now I understand that this concept isn't new. Before this video dating was a trend but that was a little more selective and it was never this widespread. But what in heavens name happens to a person so that this is the best option to find a potential partner? No confidence to ask a girl out face to face because of the chance of rejection? Do you not have a social life? Do your friends find you such a sorry catch that they aren't willing to set you up or introduce you to people they may know? Really, what downward spiral happened to lead you there?

Now I know a post will soon follow from someone who's going to say, "I met my wife" on so-and-so dot com and it was the best thing ever. It's totally normal." No, sorry. It is not normal. It is creepy. You would not want your child to go around meeting people on-line and dating them.

Yes Ghos, a lot of chicks are nuts and some will make your life difficult. But you can pretty much guarantee you aren't going to find a keeper online.

[ManOfSteal]

Hook. Up. With. Keira.

[RonnieoftheRose]

I just came out of a long difficult situation in which I thought I would never find anyone else right for me. I was so wrong and now have someone so beautiful and wholesome I wish I could have made a break sooner.

[Ghoser777]

Originally Posted by Captain Obvious

But what in heavens name happens to a person so that this is the best option to find a potential partner? No confidence to ask a girl out face to face because of the chance of rejection? Do you not have a social life? Do your friends find you such a sorry catch that they aren't willing to set you up or introduce you to people they may know? Really, what downward spiral happened to lead you there?

Yeah, my friends haven't really been a resource for dates at all. I don't run into many women who I could even potentially ask out on dates. Most of the ones I run into are already dating or married, and the single ones I've tried haven't worked out. I teach, so the only available females I see all day are "jail bait". I really don't have a big social life, and I'm not the life of the party, and I'm not good at hitting on chicks. So I tried edating to see what would happen - I've been on dates with three girls, one I didn't end up being attracted to (picture issue), one I was very attracted to but was moving to Florida, and now this one.

I'm not complaining about being pathetic - I've accepted that part of my social being. I'm just frustrated with my dating experience for over 2 years. Can't a guy date someone for over a month? Is that too much to ask?

[Cody Dawg]

"Hate" is a strong word.

I never wanted to get married and I'm a chick...I ended up married in my own good sweet time.

Don't feel pushed into it. Get married when YOU want to.

Tell her you want to be friends and that you didn't go to eHarmony to get married, but instead wanted to meet people of the opposite sex.

The journey is half the fun.

Having said that, I married my best friend. There is no, absolutely zero, friction in our relationship. When I say I married my best friend I'm not trying to sound sappy like a Hallmark card. I knew my husband for a long time. We used to go out on his motorcycle a lot, hang out together, and we discussed the people we were dating - and the relationships that never worked out. We were "friends" for about 3 years. One night we went out just to hang out together, not an official "date," and we had a fantastic time and we've been together ever since.

Relationships take time. They either are there or they aren't. You can't just "decide" to have a relationship.

[Cody Dawg]

By the way, I don't like most women either unless they're intelligent.

But, I don't "hate" them.

[jasonsRX7]

Originally Posted by Captain Obvious

Now I know a post will soon follow from someone who's going to say, "I met my wife" on so-and-so dot com and it was the best thing ever. It's totally normal." No, sorry. It is not normal. It is creepy.

I don't care to try to change your mind, but you don't say why it's creepy. Really, what difference does it make if you meet online or in a bar, or in a grocery store? Internet access is so widespread and common now that most of the people you meet online are just as normal as the ones that aren't.

Your remarks just sound really old fashioned and honestly almost like 'jock-like'. Really, if you were calling someone a "fag" for not liking football, I wouldn't be surprised.

[Stradlater]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

[RonnieoftheRose]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

No, man. In the modern world it's time to hate women, join the rightwing and convert to teh Catholic!

[Stradlater]

Originally Posted by Captain Obvious

WTF is wrong with you people who think internet dating is normal and acceptable?

Now I know a post will soon follow from someone who's going to say, "I met my wife" on so-and-so dot com and it was the best thing ever. It's totally normal." No, sorry. It is not normal. It is creepy. You would not want your child to go around meeting people on-line and dating them.

I've never even approached the whole online thing, but I think you're going a little overboard. To each his or her own, you know?

[Big Mac]

Originally Posted by Stradlater

I've never even approached the whole online thing, but I think you're going a little overboard. To each his or her own, you know?

I have to agree with Stradlater here, Captain. I know you're stating the obvious, but do you really think that you're helping this guy at all by denigrating him further?

[Rev-O]

Originally Posted by Cody Dawg

The journey is half the fun.

Of course, the journey's a hoot. Just like the ambulance ride is half the fun of a massive car crash. It's just a wonderful time.

[E's Lil Theorem]

Originally Posted by Rev-O

Originally Posted by Cody Dawg

The journey is half the fun.

Of course, the journey's a hoot. Just like the ambulance ride is half the fun of a massive car crash. It's just a wonderful time.

For some of us, the journey is all the fun. But, I guess that's our own problem

[Superchicken]

There's a girl at church who once she gets back from School I'm gona ask "So, you still single" and if she says, "Yup", I'm gona say, "Wanna go to Moxie's?"

I figure it'll be super hot and sexy... or... anyway... but yah... she's cute... and punches really hard! But... yah... I haven't had a date since like... grade 5... haha... though trust me, online relationshps... also not the thing to do... even if they're not lame like *I Kiss you" type IM crap... but... yah in general girls are evil I'm hoping to find a less evil one though...

[macaddict0001]

Sounds like their is no romance just 2 people hanging out (gender is irrelevant). You need to go to a fancy restaurant or something, and don't be afraid to undo the top two buttons of your shirt.

[shabbasuraj]

classic

[Superchicken]

By the way, don't look for common interests as a relation builder... me and my first roomie were both nerds... even had base personality traits in common... WE HATED EACH OTHER! Look for someone who is nothing like you, if you're quiet and subdued, get a muse, find a girl who IS the life of the party and will force you to be sociable. I suggest some studies of basic personalities. Figure out what type you are, then go for the opposite. The two roomie's I've had since I've gotten along best with because they are NOTHING like me...

[badidea]

Originally Posted by Ghoser777

*almost exactly my story (except the internet thing)*

I know what you are feeling Ghoser - I had the same kind of conversation last Friday with one of the most wonderful women I met in my whole life! My week was horrible!
In a few hours she is going on a trip to Berlin with me (planned last week) and I have no idea how to handle that! At least she will stay with her gay friend and I visit my brother and nephew.

Even with 32 things like this still happen!!

I will now once again become an egoistic asshole (women like that but will never admit it), seduce as many as I can and dump them right afterwards until I realize that I don't like myself when I do it...and then the story starts all over....

Originally Posted by Ghoser777

So many of you probably know of my past issues with dating women. So just recently I ran into this one girl via eharmony who seemed perfect to date. [snip]

Dude, at least eHarmony will accept you. I went through their half hour personality survey thing and it came back stating that there wasn't one person compatiable with me in their database. Talk about a low blow. Or it says something about the quality of women on there

[Rob van dam]

Originally Posted by Severed Hand of Skywalker

Time for gay

dont knock it till u tried it. i was in the same position as that guy.Ive said to much

[- - e r i k - -]

[QUOTE=Captain Obvious]WTF is wrong with you people who think internet dating is normal and acceptable?
Honestly, I could never lower my self-esteem so low that I would use a dating site. Now I understand that this concept isn't new. Before this video dating was a trend but that was a little more selective and it was never this widespread. But what in heavens name happens to a person so that this is the best option to find a potential partner? No confidence to ask a girl out face to face because of the chance of rejection? Do you not have a social life? Do your friends find you such a sorry catch that they aren't willing to set you up or introduce you to people they may know? Really, what downward spiral happened to lead you there?/QUOTE]

Meet Veronica and - - e r i k - -, happily dating for three point five years. Met through the internet. Both have social lives, friends and are not too shabby looking.

Captain Obvious I pity you and your prejudices.

[Uriel]

I actually know one of the people on the commercials personally. "Cindy" I can't remember her husbands name (she was freinds with my mom and worked at our church). It's legit, from what I've heard she's quite happy.

[wdlove]

I'm very sorry to hear about you latest situation Ghoser777. I agree that "hate" is a little too strong. It sounds as though you are better off without her. Always hurts to be rejected. I'm confident that the right person will come along when you least expect.

[starman]

Originally Posted by Captain Obvious

Yes Ghos, a lot of chicks are nuts and some will make your life difficult. But you can pretty much guarantee you aren't going to find a keeper online.

Why? Does being online automatically make you an assh*le? I never understood the equality of internet dating and idiocy. I know two couples that are VERY happily married with people they met online.

Mike

[OreoCookie]

I'm still debating whether struggling with a difficult relationship is better than your situation ... It may sound paradox, but sometimes I love women for the very same reason: they have the ability to surprise men (positively and negatively). And sometimes they drive men nuts.

PS SWG, my observations of gay relationships tells me that gay relationships are basically the same as hetero ones -- ok, maybe it's harder to tell who got the pants on

[turtle777]

I don't understand all that talk about meeting people OUTSIDE the internet.
What are you guys talking about ? Is there another world I don't know of ? Is it worth it ?

-t

[goMac]

Originally Posted by turtle777

Is there another world I don't know of ? Is it worth it ?

It's called World of Warcraft.

[Millennium]

When it comes to common interests versus opposites attracting, I find the following rule of thumb to work well: if other people will spend hours arguing over whether you and your mate are exactly alike or totally different, then this is a Good Sign.

I would advise you to go a bit more towards differences than similarities, though. Is not half the joy of relationships in the learning, in discovering things you might never have encountered otherwise?

[turtle777]

Originally Posted by goMac

It's called World of Warcraft.

Aahh, I heard dating suxx in that world...

-t

[WhaMe]

Don't take your lack of internet dating success too personally. Meeting the right person can take time.

Like you, I am an accomplished, but shy individual. Meeting women isn't easy for me, but I have met a few over the internet. I dated one women for about 4 months before things ended. There was a lack of chemistry with another women that I met, but we've become friends based on our common interests. And tonight, I have a date with someone else that I met on eHarmony.

I heard somewhere that about 1 in 20 online matches result in a relationship. The internet is not going to provide you with your soul mate, you have to do that yourself. Dating sites are just one vehicle to meet women. Meet as many as you can and have fun along the way.

[historylme]

Continue to date, it's a numbers game. Simple as that. Use a shot gun affect, you are bound to hit something (preferably, aim for the once that interest you). If you must, develop a smooth or rico suave nature to you... this comes in handy when you feel like doing something (normally the general American internal self judge says you shouldn't), you do it (Latino style). Kiss the hand, invade her personal space... be cheesy and brash, why not.

Most young women are looking for ass holes anyway (if dating for dating). They want the challenge, excitement and fun). It's only (in my experience) after they have been burn by the jerks (rebels they grew up adoring), or they are mature enough, that they begin to look for the "nice" guy.

In additions, when going out with women that you meet. Show indiference to them (if they are hot) and simply enjoy yourself and have a good time. The challenge thus is layed out for them. Show that you been burn, that you are jaded and they will try to show you that love is real. But before all this, you have make them interested in you.

Good luck.

ps. If you do something creative, start developing that side and go to places where like minded people go.

[SimpleLife]

Originally Posted by Cody Dawg

"Hate" is a strong word.

I never wanted to get married and I'm a chick...I ended up married in my own good sweet time.

Don't feel pushed into it. Get married when YOU want to.

Tell her you want to be friends and that you didn't go to eHarmony to get married, but instead wanted to meet people of the opposite sex.

The journey is half the fun.

Having said that, I married my best friend. There is no, absolutely zero, friction in our relationship. When I say I married my best friend I'm not trying to sound sappy like a Hallmark card. I knew my husband for a long time. We used to go out on his motorcycle a lot, hang out together, and we discussed the people we were dating - and the relationships that never worked out. We were "friends" for about 3 years. One night we went out just to hang out together, not an official "date," and we had a fantastic time and we've been together ever since.

Relationships take time. They either are there or they aren't. You can't just "decide" to have a relationship.

Totally agree with you. You need to build some common interests and what our lives in smaller community would provide in time to share, modern lives provide less.

Hanging with people a long time, getting to know them over a long time is a nice way to ensure relationship longevity.

But being struck by lightning can work too.

[Goldfinger]

I'm in a situations where I could say: yes, I hate women they suck. But, actually they don't.

[nonhuman]

Originally Posted by Goldfinger

I'm in a situations where I could say: yes, I hate women they suck. But, actually they don't.

Oh but they do, it's one of the best parts.

[Goldfinger]

Yeah well, not really what I meant. But you are right I guess

[iCol]

Trust me, you don't want to turn gay! There are even less available good-gay-guys than there are their female counterparts! It has been 3 years since I last met anyone worth dating. I hate being gay sometimes.

Oh, and my longest relationship was with a guy I met on the net. Yeah, it was odd actually arranging to meet up for the first time, but after that it was just like we had met in a bar or something. I don't think it is any less natural than meeting in social situations, especially for gay guys who are just not comfortable going up to someone at a party and asking them if they are gay, as a precursor to conversation.

Yes, gay bars offer a more likely venue to meet someone, but then the majority of guys who go to gay bars are not the kind of guy I am interested in dating, so, I guess... the internet does have its uses on this front.

I would prefer to meet someone in the 'real world', however, if I met the man of my dreams on the net, who am I to argue?

[kmkkid]

I like women.


But I Looooooooove men.





Chris

[kmkkid]

Originally Posted by iCol

Trust me, you don't want to turn gay! There are even less available good-gay-guys than there are their female counterparts! It has been 3 years since I last met anyone worth dating. I hate being gay sometimes.

Well if most gays wernt so vain, they might meet a nice guy.






Chris

[iCol]

I am probably the least vain guy you will ever meet.

A high proportion of gay men are only after one thing... there are very very few that I could ever see myself falling in love with. The problem is, I am not steriotypically gay, many people don't beleive me when I tell them I am, and I generally only find other gay guys similar to myself attractive. Screaming queens, unfortunately, do not float my boat! Does that make me vain? If so, guilty as charged!

[kmkkid]

Originally Posted by iCol

I am probably the least vain guy you will ever meet.

A high proportion of gay men are only after one thing... there are very very few that I could ever see myself falling in love with. The problem is, I am not steriotypically gay, many people don't beleive me when I tell them I am, and I generally only find other gay guys similar to myself attractive. Screaming queens, unfortunately, do not float my boat! Does that make me vain? If so, guilty as charged!

I wasnt calling you vain personally. I was just venting

I too am sick of all the 'better than thou' queens of this world. Yet they are my friends, cause thats all that exists. I tend to go for the more down to earth guys. Unfortunatly the straight acting guys typically want to hang with their straight buddies and do drugs and drink their lives away.

More venting



Chris