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Mr Kino · Feb 21, 2006, 08:06 PM

Well not me personally but my younger brother is in trouble.

my younger brother is 21 and he was dating a 16 year old. He got caught in her bed and was taken to jail. my parents bailed him out and is at home waiting for his court date.

I guess my questions are these:

What kind of sentence is he looking at? (he lives in southern california)?

he is a broke 21 year old, should he be looking for a lawyer on his own right now?

I suggested to him that he should not run and hire a lawyer immediately. the reason being, that because he is so broke, they might appoint him a lawyer to his case.

you will not imagine how much mail he has gotten in one week from all sorts of lawyers offering him their services. He has called a few, but they are asking anywhere from 9k to 25k to defend him.

waxcrash · Feb 21, 2006, 08:09 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

my younger brother is 21 and he was dating a 16 year old. He got caught in her bed and was taken to jail.

Did he know the girl was only 16? How did he get caught. Who called the cops? Give us more details.

f1000 · Feb 21, 2006, 08:15 PM

http://forums.macnn.com/showthread.php?t=241627

cpt kangarooski · Feb 21, 2006, 08:19 PM

He should get the best lawyer he can, as soon as he can. This is not only to defend himself, but also so that he is well-informed of the possible civil and criminal penalties he faces; he can make better decisions if he knows more.

Chuckit · Feb 21, 2006, 08:34 PM

Yeah, he'll want a good lawyer. I'm not a lawyer and I'm not commenting on this specific case, but statutory rape penalties in California can be over $10,000 and a year in jail.

Ganesha · Feb 21, 2006, 08:46 PM

Originally Posted by Chuckit

Yeah, he'll want a good lawyer. I'm not a lawyer and I'm not commenting on this specific case, but statutory rape penalties in California can be over $10,000 and a year in jail.

Not to mention having to register as a sex offender.

hickey · Feb 21, 2006, 09:32 PM

man im really sorry to hear, I wish the best for your brother

sknapp351 · Feb 21, 2006, 09:45 PM

When I was 19 I was dating this girl who I honestly thought was a month away from her 18th birthday. When her birthday came around, I showed up to the part and saw Sweet 16 decorations. I almost got sick right there. We had not been together long enought to have started having physical relations thankfully. The weirdest thing was her parents had met me a few times, and knew I had already graduated from high school. And her father was a Deacon at the Catholic Church. Scary moments, needless to say it ended very quickly there after. Point is, young girls do not always act or look young. Innocence isn't always prized anymore sadly. I, for one, cannot judge him as being in the wrong without knowing more.
SAm

Mastrap · Feb 21, 2006, 09:46 PM

What's the age of consent in Cali?

stevesnj · Feb 21, 2006, 09:48 PM

A 16 year old may be consenting but he should know better....shame on him.

Mastrap · Feb 21, 2006, 09:54 PM

I dated a girl when I had just turned 18 who was a couple of months away from turning 16. She wasn't worried, but I was so scared about her parents taking action that I made 100% sure nothing happened before her 16th birthday. It's just not worth it.

wdlove · Feb 21, 2006, 10:17 PM

He needs to get a good lawyer as soon as possible.

Mr Kino · Feb 22, 2006, 01:46 AM

Originally Posted by waxcrash

Did he know the girl was only 16? How did he get caught. Who called the cops? Give us more details.

yes the dork knew she was 16, from what i understand he was chilling in her room and the father walked in. The dad so, called the cops on him. Oh and he gave him a good beating. lol...

i do not blame the dad one bit, i mean i would so hurt someone if they came close to my younger sister. but its my brother, and i just want to give him the best advice i can.

Someone mentioned that he has to register as a sex offender? Dang... 10k and one year in jail.

In some twisted way i think my brother deserves that he got caught. He has been a bum (hence the fact that he is broke) and only seems to care about partying all the time. I feel that this is going to be his wake up call and that you cant be messing around and being irresponsible.

Thanks so far for the comments.

thesunisgone · Feb 22, 2006, 03:48 AM

What a twisted legal system. 16 is old enough, as long as the parents are okay with it, which they aren't in this case. The penalties should stop at a beating from the dad. I just can't believe what some judges think they can do. it's SHOCKING. And the legal system abusing people to "help" them become more "responsible" is just more insanity.

Chuckit · Feb 22, 2006, 04:19 AM

Originally Posted by Mastrap

What's the age of consent in Cali?

California's statutory rape laws are kind of complicated. The age of consent is 18. But how wide the age difference is and whether one of the parties is under 16 affects whether it's a felony or misdemeanor and how harsh the penalties are.

UNTeMac · Feb 22, 2006, 04:41 AM

Is there any proof of sexual activity? Will the girl testify in his defense?

Ozmodiar · Feb 22, 2006, 04:49 AM

Did he get caught IN her bed or ON her bed? There's a bit of a different.

Also, if there's no evidence that they've secksed I can't see how your brother will end up in jail. I guess the parents could press charges but still, for what? Being in a 16 year-old's room?

turtle777 · Feb 22, 2006, 10:55 AM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

from what i understand he was chilling in her room and the father walked in.

WTF does that mean ?

Did he just hang out, or was his wanker hanging out as well ?

HUGE difference !

Mastrap · Feb 22, 2006, 10:58 AM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

yes the dork knew she was 16, from what i understand he was chilling in her room and the father walked in. The dad so, called the cops on him. Oh and he gave him a good beating. lol...

If he wasn't doing anything then the dad should count himself lucky if he doesn't get done for assault.

Paco500 · Feb 22, 2006, 01:25 PM

Were I him I'd hire the best lawyer I could and plan on being in debt for a long time.

Being in debt is better than being in jail.

production_coordinator · Feb 22, 2006, 01:44 PM

Ugh... well, I would try to talk to the father. If the father wasn't being cooperative, I might hint about a lawyer and how I would be forced to sue and press charges for assault [your brother did take photos of every little bruise didn't he?]. Perhaps something like "our lawyers don't need to battle this in court and us both ending up in jail" The father is ALSO in a bad situation.

I would also agree to not seeing the girl again [or whatever] to get the father to agree not to press charges.

[I'm not a layer... and you should take this advice from someone that doesn't know anything about the law]

Mr Kino · Feb 22, 2006, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by Paco500

Were I him I'd hire the best lawyer I could and plan on being in debt for a long time.

Being in debt is better than being in jail.

You make a strong point.

ok last night I got more details on what happened. turns out that chilling meant that he was in her room at 6 in the morning and the mom walked in and he ran into the closet to hide but a little too late. when the husband heard his wife screaming he went into the room and my bro high tailed it out of there.

oh and this will add to the excitement. The girl's brother is a police officer and was there that night and was the one to arrest my brother.

i wonder what type of parents that girl has. i mean to not know what their little girl is doing? i live with my younger sister who is also the age of this girl and i watch her and spend time with her as much as i can. my sister knows not to date older guys and is carefull online.

i guess i should have watched my brother and made it clear to him that he should not be dating younger girls. oh man i cant keep my eye on everyone.

my parents...?? ahh they are always working so i take care of things around the house.

sorry, i am at work and have a little too much time on my hands. =) thanks for all the advice, its definatly helping.

phantomdragonz · Feb 22, 2006, 01:47 PM

Originally Posted by what_the_heck

WTF does that mean ?

Did he just hang out, or was his wanker hanging out as well ?

HUGE difference !

so the real question is

Did he hang out with his wang out?

lol

Sorry, nothing to add, hope everything goes well...

Zach

Chuckit · Feb 22, 2006, 02:08 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

i wonder what type of parents that girl has. i mean to not know what their little girl is doing? i live with my younger sister who is also the age of this girl and i watch her and spend time with her as much as i can. my sister knows not to date older guys and is carefull online.

Perhaps your family is just genetically docile, but many 16-year-olds don't particularly like such restrictions.

production_coordinator · Feb 22, 2006, 02:25 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

i wonder what type of parents that girl has. i mean to not know what their little girl is doing? i live with my younger sister who is also the age of this girl and i watch her and spend time with her as much as i can. my sister knows not to date older guys and is carefull online.

On the flip side of that... what parents raise a child that when he turns 21, thinks it's OK to date a 16 year old girl? I wouldn't pass judgement on the parent's fathers before passing judgement on those around you.

wolfen · 02:56 PM

Well, it's obvious your brother was making the best decision for himself: to party hard and engage in statutory rape must've been a very enlightening experience. It's a shame our mean government doesn't understand that everyone just needs to do what feels good.

One day your brother will learn how to do all this and more, and not get caught. And then we can all rejoice in his freedom. Yay!

In short: the young man needs to go to jail.

edited: Took out the word "bastard."

meelk · Feb 22, 2006, 02:39 PM

So he beat him after being the one to arrest him? Did you get pictures? This seems like something easy enough to get out of.

euchomai · Feb 22, 2006, 02:56 PM

Originally Posted by wolfen

Well, it's obvious your brother was making the best decision for himself: to party hard and engage in statutory rape must've been a very enlightening experience. It's a shame our mean government doesn't understand that everyone just needs to do what feels good.

One day your brother will learn how to do all this and more, and not get caught. And then we can all rejoice in his freedom. Yay!

In short: the bastard needs to go to jail.

Good point, harsh words, but good point none the less. This thread fits well with the sex before marriage thread. I wonder what kronos will say?

Miniryu · Feb 22, 2006, 02:59 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

You make a strong point.

ok last night I got more details on what happened...

Okay, you still didn't say exactly what he was doing with her. Even if all he did was have his wang out, it can still be argued as a lewd and lavacious act. Correct me if I'm wrong, but since the girl was over 16 the penalties are not very harsh for a lewd and lavacious act. As long as sex wasn't going on.

Mr Kino · Feb 22, 2006, 03:11 PM

Originally Posted by Miniryu

Okay, you still didn't say exactly what he was doing with her. Even if all he did was have his wang out, it can still be argued as a lewd and lavacious act. Correct me if I'm wrong, but since the girl was over 16 the penalties are not very harsh for a lewd and lavacious act. As long as sex wasn't going on.

I will ask him today when i get home from works. but i am sure he did, he is a little player, sometimes i wonder how many girls he has slept with. i guess it finally cought up to him.

sadly, i agree, the bastard does deserve to go to jail.

Severed Hand of Skywalker · Feb 22, 2006, 03:14 PM

Originally Posted by Mr Kino

I will ask him today when i get home from works. but i am sure he did, he is a little player, sometimes i wonder how many girls he has slept with. i guess it finally cought up to him.

sadly, i agree, the bastard does deserve to go to jail.

Sounds like he did have sex with her than and he deserves to get punished for it.

No judge will give him maximum sentence though, if anything i just see probation.

ort888 · 03:33 PM

21 and 16 aren't THAT far apart. While I think he should have some sort of legal repercussions from this, it's not really that big of a deal. Not in my mind anyway. It's pretty tame compared to most things you hear about.

I dated a 16 year old when I was 19. But in actuality, she was actually only 2 years and 3 months younger then me, it just worked out that way in the beginning with our birthdays falling in weird places. Then again, we had been friends for a long time and ended up together for 5 years. This was a one night stand.

I guess I'm saying that this brother guy could have turned 21 a week ago and the girl could be practically 17. 20 and 17 doesn't sound half as bad as 21 and 16. Then again, she could be 15 and a week and he could be a month from 22. Who knows.

smacintush · Feb 22, 2006, 03:30 PM

Yes the bastard needs to rot in jail for daring to have sex with a girl…

Good god she's 16 not 10. These laws are bit lop-sided. In some states that very same act is called "child rape". Ridiculous.

Doofy · Feb 22, 2006, 03:44 PM

Quite excessive laws considering he's only 21.

Interesting difference between there and here, where your granddad could legally pleasure a 16-year-old if both parties were consenting (and it wasn't a commercial transaction).

turtle777 · Feb 22, 2006, 03:59 PM

Let me emphasize / paraphrase what I read:

The girls dad beat your brother up while the brother of the girl (cop) stood by until dad was done, and then the cop-brother arrested him ?

Yeah, your bro is gonna be fine IF he gets a good lawyer !

wolfen · Feb 22, 2006, 04:06 PM

Heck, 10 and 15 are the same distance apart. 12 and 7? Sure thing.

The point is society has chosen its line. The brother is wasting his life away. Yes, that's his business. It becomes society's business when he starts breaking laws.

The logic of "Aw it's not big deal because grandpa did it" just doesn't hold (for those of you predisposed to that line of thinking). Once upon a time, the King could seize your property and kill you for fun. Once upon a time, people were thrown in jail for a $5 debt. Once upon a time women couldn't vote. Americans owned slaves.

Either we are moving forward or sliding back. Reminiscing about the good old days when molestation was legal is hardly laudable.

ort888 · Feb 22, 2006, 04:14 PM

You are right that society has drawn a line in the sand... however, there is a reason that we have judges. The law isn't black and white and there are exceptions and unique circumstances to every case. What if she was 16 and he was 17? Is that rape? What about 18? 19?

It's not like he was 35 or something. They were both kids. I think he should get some sort of legal punishment... just not jail time. No reason to ruin the kids life over something like this. give him some probation or community service. Make him take a class... I dunno. I just don't see a reason to send him to jail. It seems over the top.

wolfen · Feb 22, 2006, 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by ort888

You are right that society has drawn a line in the sand... however, there is a reason that we have judges. The law isn't black and white and there are exceptions and unique circumstances to every case. What if she was 16 and he was 17? Is that rape? What about 18? 19?

It's not like he was 35 or something. They were both kids. I think he should get some sort of legal punishment... just not jail time. No reason to ruin the kids life over something like this. give him some probation or community service. Make him take a class... I dunno. I just don't see a reason to send him to jail. It seems over the top.

Point taken. Thank God for judges. Maybe a month in jail, 1 year probation would be fair?

My angle is not simply penalization, but something that will wake him up and get him out of his funk. Right now he's ALREADY wasting his life. Something needs to happen to show him so. That's all. Didn't mean to be the crotchety old fart...which I am...and stuff.

IceEnclosure · Feb 22, 2006, 05:16 PM

meh.. in this, the final hours before my 30th birthday, I recall:

I was out at a club a few years back, had a hot ass chick come up and ask me to buy her a drink, I do so, we dance for a bit, she says 'let's go'.. we go to my buddy's house. It's me, my buddy, and these two girls. Scantily clad homegirl goes into the bathroom. I flip open her wallet which is out on the table, thinking she's like 18 or so (she kept saying she was 21, I was 24 at the time). Her ID said she was farking 16 years old. If her ID said she was 20, I definitely would have believed it.
She was hot, and I hadn't a clue. I kicked her young ass out, her and her 18 year old friend (whom my friend was already diggin' on in the other room).

I'd like to say I limit myself at 21+ girls, but I'd be lying (lately at least).. let's say 19+

I'd advise your brother that he'll make great strides in his player-ness and sex-life if he messes only with girls that have their own living space, as I'm yet to meet a female with their own place that's under the age of 18. (now, if he just wants to be a high-school troller his whole life, there's no helping him)

Keep it legal playa!

Miniryu · Feb 23, 2006, 04:17 AM

Originally Posted by smacintush

These laws are bit lop-sided.

These laws are insanely lop-sided. Name any other crime that requires a person to be featured on a website like this: http://www.meganslaw.com/
Some of these people need serious help, others are just status offenders, like Mr. Kino's brother. Murderers don't even have to register and inform the local community where they live.

stevesnj · Feb 23, 2006, 05:55 PM

Just because 16 may seem to some old enough and 21 to 16 not that far apart that is beside the point. The law is clear if it is found that a 21 year old having even consentual sex with someone under the age of consent is still a felonious action no matter what we may think. Shame on him anyway, if you still have to take the bus to school that should be dead giveaway to stay away.