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mojo2 · Sep 17, 2005, 06:34 AM

Yes, I was sent this in an email but even though it may seem trite, EVERY MAN HERE will attest to the accuracy of the definitions.

To you younger guys, take notes.

WORDS WOMEN USE

FINE. This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are
right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman
looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES. This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes
that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so
it's an even trade.

NOTHING. This means "something", and you should be on your toes. "Nothing"
is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an
argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with 'Fine'

GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows). This is a dare. One that will result in a
woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"

GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows). This means "I give up" or "do what you want
because I don't care". You will get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a
few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in
about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH. This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often
misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at
that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and
arguing with you over "Nothing"

SOFT SIGH. Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" means
that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will
stay content.

THAT'S OKAY. This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can
make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard
before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's
Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised
Eyebrow.

GO AHEAD. At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some
mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO. This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you
the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing
whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth,
be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"

THANKS. A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you're welcome.

THANKS A LOT. This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say,
"Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you
have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud
Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she
will only tell you "Nothing"

Randman · Sep 17, 2005, 06:36 AM

So true, so true.

Mastrap · Sep 17, 2005, 08:05 AM

I showed this to my wife. She sighed.

I was David B. · Sep 17, 2005, 08:20 AM

Originally Posted by Mastrap

I showed this to my wife. She sighed.

Loud, I assume.

OreoCookie · Sep 17, 2005, 08:27 AM

Women 101
description: how to understand basic verbal and non-verbal communication by females.

Women 102
description: how to react appropriately

rozwado1 · Sep 17, 2005, 08:34 AM

You guys gotta find some new women.

Pendergast · Sep 17, 2005, 08:38 AM

I got the same in French 2 days ago...

amsalpemkcus · Sep 17, 2005, 09:03 AM

Womyn: what are you thinking?
myn: sex.

scottiB · Sep 17, 2005, 10:58 AM

Originally Posted by Pendergast

I got the same in French 2 days ago...

I thought that was just a reflection of the French perma-ennui,

ba-boom, crash--thankyouverymuch

En-E-Way, with my wife, the loud sigh is combined with the guttural exasperation.

wdlove · Sep 17, 2005, 11:11 AM

I'm surprised that Cody hasn't commented. Very nice.

Kevin · Sep 17, 2005, 11:22 AM

She would just sigh alot.

BlueSky · Sep 17, 2005, 11:40 AM

I think she would post a plethora of winkies.

But let's stop speculating. Cody, what...just WHAT would you say?

Kevin · Sep 17, 2005, 11:54 AM

Originally Posted by BlueSky

plethora of winkies.

Tell me, do you even KNOW what a plethora is? How many in a plethora. Tell Us.

BlueSky · Sep 17, 2005, 12:06 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin

Tell me, do you even KNOW what a plethora is? How many in a plethora. Tell Us.

A plethora is:
-Scads.
-Too many to count.
-Kabillions.
-My second favorite word after "extrapolate".

I'll try to dumb it down next time, Kev. "Whole bunch". How's that?

Kevin · Sep 17, 2005, 12:58 PM

BlueSky, ever see the movie "The Three Amigos" ?

Jefe: We have stuffed many pinatas for your birthday celebration!
El Guapo: How many pinatas?
Jefe: Many pinatas, many!
El Guapo: Jefe, would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?
Jefe: Yes, El Guapo. You have a plethora.
El Guapo: Jefe, what is a plethora?

Macfreak7 · Sep 17, 2005, 01:05 PM

Women are meant to be loved, and not to be understood.

BlueSky · Sep 17, 2005, 01:29 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin

BlueSky, ever see the movie "The Three Amigos" ?

Jefe: We have stuffed many pinatas for your birthday celebration!
El Guapo: How many pinatas?
Jefe: Many pinatas, many!
El Guapo: Jefe, would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?
Jefe: Yes, El Guapo. You have a plethora.
El Guapo: Jefe, what is a plethora?

I may have seen parts of it if not the whole thing. Hazy. Have you seen this thread?

bluesky: A plethora of winkies!
kevin: How many winkies?
bluesky: A plethora!
kevin: Bluesky, do you even know what a plethora is?
bluesky: Yes, Kevin. It is many bunches.
kevin: Bluesky, just say "bunches"! "Plethora" pisses me off!

Kevin · Sep 17, 2005, 01:35 PM

But that isn't how the thread went.

bluesky: a plethora of winkies
kevin: makes Three Amigos reference about the world plethora
bluesky: not understanding makes some silly comment about kevin not understanding what that word means.
kevin: posts a reference to his original post to clarify.

BlueSky · 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by Kevin

But that isn't how the thread went.

bluesky: a plethora of winkies
kevin: makes Three Amigos reference about the world plethora
bluesky: not understanding makes some silly comment about kevin not understanding what that word means.
kevin: posts a reference to his original post to clarify.

Ohhh! Well perhaps Kevin shouldn't make what might be an obscure reference* or BlueSky gets all confused!

Sorry Kev, I was hoping...er...thinking you were starting a scrap.

*but something tells me you knew that...

benign · Sep 17, 2005, 01:58 PM

Female terminology - I have heard peeps call the fairer sex:

'Chiquita'

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chiquita

Kevin · Sep 17, 2005, 02:18 PM

Originally Posted by BlueSky

Ohhh! Well perhaps Kevin shouldn't make what might be an obscure reference* or BlueSky gets all confused!

Sorry Kev, I was hoping...er...thinking you were starting a scrap.

*but something tells me you knew that...

Naw, this is a kindler, gentler Kevin.

But I still wear my leather studded codpiece.

as2 · Sep 17, 2005, 02:25 PM

Stupid Women.

goMac · Sep 17, 2005, 02:27 PM

Originally Posted by rozwado1

You guys gotta find some new women.

BlueSky · Sep 17, 2005, 02:57 PM

Originally Posted by mojo2

WORDS WOMEN USE

WHAT ARE YOU DOING BACK THERE ?

(Which often precedes "GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows). This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine")

andi*pandi · Sep 17, 2005, 03:38 PM

::raises eyebrows::

::sighs::

JustAnOl'Broad · Sep 17, 2005, 04:43 PM

Originally Posted by andi*pandi

::raises eyebrows::

::sighs::

what she said ^^
P~

ReggieX · Sep 17, 2005, 06:34 PM

OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD. Aren't you done yet?

mojo2 · 07:08 PM

Originally Posted by benign

Female terminology - I have heard peeps call the fairer sex:

'Chiquita'

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=chiquita

1. chiquita link send redefine 11 up, 1 down
cute petite girl, can be used as a pet name for ones girlfriend.
Hey, did you see that chiquita that was hangin' on Steve's mom? I didn't know that MILF was into girls.

Hey Steve, let me know when your mom is done with that chiquita.
Source: zoloft zantac, Mar 29, 2004

Would that be like calling a guy, "Blow-up Doll?"

mojo2 · Sep 17, 2005, 07:10 PM

Originally Posted by andi*pandi

::raises eyebrows::

::sighs::

Was that a LOUD sigh...

mojo2 · Sep 17, 2005, 07:11 PM

Originally Posted by JustAnOl'Broad

what she said ^^
P~

...or a SOFT sigh?

JustAnOl'Broad · Sep 17, 2005, 07:17 PM

Mine is usually soft sigh, short session of muttering to myself,
shake my head and walk away.
I'm a lover, not a fighter.

mojo2 · Sep 17, 2005, 07:24 PM

Originally Posted by JustAnOl'Broad

Mine is usually soft sigh, short session of muttering to myself,
shake my head and walk away.
I'm a lover, not a fighter.