[Doofy]

Ugliest Tattoos: A Gallery of Regrets

From the sad:



To the WTF:



Worth a look (some NSFW).

[Laminar]

[Laminar]

[Eug]

Chocolate Rain is awesome.

[OreoCookie]

What about the obligatory pic of the Zune guy?

[Phileas]

No matter the subject matter, that's awesome ink.

[paul w]

I agree. It's kind of wonderful, really.

[ghostshadow]

This one just cracked me up good.

[mattyb]

Sounds like such a nice person



I quote :

UPDATE:
Thanks to those commenters who have pointed us to more info on Zombie Boy. We found this interview particularly enlightening. Zombie Boy is predictably insane and also unintentionally hilarious. For example, this is his explanation of why he does what he does:

“I thought long and hard about what I really wanted, what my passion was. And I decided I wanted to be a f*$#ing zombie.”

Zombie Boy also says that he’s a “much happier person” since getting his tattoos and no longer wants “to f*$#ing kill everybody.” Ladies?

End quote.

[Andy8]

Originally Posted by mattyb 

Sounds like such a nice person



I quote :

UPDATE:
Thanks to those commenters who have pointed us to more info on Zombie Boy. We found this interview particularly enlightening. Zombie Boy is predictably insane and also unintentionally hilarious. For example, this is his explanation of why he does what he does:

“I thought long and hard about what I really wanted, what my passion was. And I decided I wanted to be a f*$#ing zombie.”

Zombie Boy also says that he’s a “much happier person” since getting his tattoos and no longer wants “to f*$#ing kill everybody.” Ladies?

End quote.

Wonder how he gets on in face to face job interviews.

[mattyb]

Originally Posted by Andy8 

Wonder how he gets on in face to face job interviews.

Job? In a circus maybe.

[msuper69]

Why can't I get a job?

[msuper69]

[reader50]

msuper69, please be advised that using an idisk URL is not the best way to post a picture online. Your links caused Firefox to freeze up with an endless login pane. Safari does better - it forces the cancel button to be respected after the 2nd go-around.



Since I don't have a .mac account, no login was possible. I ended up having to force-quit FF since regular Quit caused a rapid cycling of the pane and nothing more. If memory serves, you can safely post an idisk-hosted pic by modifying the URL to your .mac website.

[msuper69]

Originally Posted by reader50 

msuper69, please be advised that using an idisk URL is not the best way to post a picture online. Your links caused Firefox to freeze up with an endless login pane. Safari does better - it forces the cancel button to be respected after the 2nd go-around.



Since I don't have a .mac account, no login was possible. I ended up having to force-quit FF since regular Quit caused a rapid cycling of the pane and nothing more. If memory serves, you can safely post an idisk-hosted pic by modifying the URL to your .mac website.

So sorry. I don't post pictures very often and forgot to put them in the Public area of my iDisk.
Thanks for the quick edit to prevent others from stumbling over the login prompt.

[tooki]

Originally Posted by msuper69 

Heh, I met Cat years ago (along with Lizardman), and Pauly (lower pic) is on my iChat buddy list.

[turtle777]

Man, that stuff is making me sick. I just don't get the appeal.

-t

[tooki]

for the purposes of this post, here’s a pic of Lizardman:



As a point of trivia (or really, me trying to dispel the myths/prejudices about heavily modified people), here’s a little quiz about those 3 folks:

1. What level of education does Lizardman, the sideshow performer, have?
   1. High school dropout
   2. BA
   3. MA
   4. PhD
      
2. What does Cat do for a living?
   1. Construction worker
   2. Engineer
   3. Tattoo artist
   4. Starving artist/lives off disability
      
3. What does Pauly Unstoppable do for a living?
   1. Thrift store sales clerk
   2. Starving artist/lives off disability
   3. Hair stylist
   4. Piercer

Click for the answers.

 

1. Lizardman has a PhD in psychology, and is known in the sideshow interview circuit for being exceedingly articulate. He’s also gone on TV and had a psychological evaluation done, upon which the examining doctor proclaimed him to be of normal psychological health.
2. When I met him, Cat was a senior engineer at a high-tech company. He got his modifications while continuing employment with the company. He’s probably retired by now, or is about to.
3. Pauly is in beauty school learning to be a stylist.

[Demonhood]

let's not forget the Enigma:

[Big Mac]

I like the guy with knives in his nose.

[mattyb]

Originally Posted by tooki 

As a point of trivia (or really, me trying to dispel the myths/prejudices about heavily modified people), here’s a little quiz about those 3 folks:

The cat thing person could have an IQ of 200, ensure that the kittens of some large city never go un-fed, and dedicate his weekends to gardening for old peoples' homes, but I still wouldn't want him to be seen by any of my company's clients.

[RAILhead]

I see nothing wrong with this, myself...

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by msuper69 

"Life after Top Gear had taken an interesting turn for James May."

[ThinkInsane]

Originally Posted by RAILhead 

I see nothing wrong with this, myself...

I concur

[SpaceMonkey]

[placebo1969]

"Daddy, please pay attention to me!!!"

[ghporter]

Originally Posted by SpaceMonkey 

Kitty is thinking "any day now, I will completely destroy every fiber of your being, all for this!" Or "shiny!" Hard to tell...

I have to admit that the more extreme modifications still disturb me. I've been studying for a long time to learn how to help minimize "modifications" that could occur during healing after accidents, and yet there are people who go out of their way to induce those same effects. I've managed to channel my discomfort into a clinical analysis of how the mods that make me least comfortable were done. I generally just hope that the individual doesn't have any functional issues because of them. But modifying teeth is both scary and expensive, and having enough dental issues of my own, I sort of cringe when I see where people have modified their actual teeth, versus having caps applied.

Does Cat look different in a less distorted picture? Something taken at a "normal" distance with a "normal" lens? (Photographically speaking, of course?)

[slugslugslug]

Originally Posted by RAILhead 

I see nothing wrong with this, myself...

Well, except that maybe she’s got too many clothes on.

(nothing that a subscription to a popular pinup site won’t fix)

[moonmonkey]

Originally Posted by turtle777 

Man, that stuff is making me sick. I just don't get the appeal.

-t

It seems like they are compensating for some unresolved childhood abuse.
Its quite upsetting how parents can screw their kids up.

[tooki]

Originally Posted by ghporter 

Does Cat look different in a less distorted picture? Something taken at a "normal" distance with a "normal" lens? (Photographically speaking, of course?)

That picture pretty much is faithful to reality (I'm not actually sure it is taken with a wide angle). He has significant cheek and lip implants (not sure if it's silicone or collagen), and his nose was surgically flattened to be more feline, so...

Originally Posted by moonmonkey 

It seems like they are compensating for some unresolved childhood abuse.
Its quite upsetting how parents can screw their kids up.

The problem with that theory is that it doesn't hold water. People often make that assumption, but I'm pretty heavily into body modification, and I was never abused. And most of the modded people I know (just like most of the un-modded people I know) were never abused. I do it because... I like it!

Sorry, but "there must be abuse" is just an a non-modified person's justification for their own prejudice. You don't want it for yourself, and can't understand why anyone else would, and so rather than trying to understand (or asking!), you try to come up with "sensible" explanations so that you can continue feeding your fear and confusion.

There's an old saying: "What's the difference between people who have tattoos and those who don't? - Tattooed people don't care whether you have tattoos or not."

[Oisín]

Originally Posted by tooki 

When I met him, Cat was …

Wait … that’s a he?!?

Now that I know, I do see some stubble—but damn, that looks so much more like a woman than a man.

Originally Posted by tooki

The problem with that theory is that it doesn't hold water. People often make that assumption, but I'm pretty heavily into body modification, and I was never abused. And most of the modded people I know (just like most of the un-modded people I know) were never abused. I do it because... I like it!

Sorry, but "there must be abuse" is just an a non-modified person's justification for their own prejudice. You don't want it for yourself, and can't understand why anyone else would, and so rather than trying to understand (or asking!), you try to come up with "sensible" explanations so that you can continue feeding your fear and confusion.

I agree the abuse thing is nonsense (why would abuse result in you wanting to modify your body?). But I’ll also readily admit that I don’t understand it. Why on earth would somebody want to actively modify (a part of me wants to say ‘destroy’) your body in order to look like a cat, or a hyaena, or a marmot, or a teacup, or … pretty much anything. What’s wrong with being human?

In the same way (though more extreme), I don’t get people who want to be cripples, who want to have limbs amputated, want to make themselves go blind, etc. I just don’t see any logical reason for it. Yeah, sure, there are lots of things that don’t necessarily have logical reasons, and I’m probably just being bigoted … but I just don’t understand what lies behind the desire to change your body that much. I can accept that someone feels they were born in a wrong-gendered body and want a sex change, ’cause they at least have a way of knowing what they’re dealing with there. But wanting to become another species, or an inanimate object? Just … why?

[tooki]

Cat is male, Katzen is female:

 

As for why someone would want to become a cat or whatever:
Honestly? I don't know! But I do respect that a person should be able to decide for themselves and not have (legal) limitations imposed by others. (For example, if you want to get certain heavy body modifications, in most countries you have to go to an underground practitioner -- with the risk that that entails -- because a professional doctor won't do it for legal reasons. Nobody wins.) And I certainly respect somebody having the guts to do it despite the repercussions they will undoubtedly face. Most people are, frankly, much too conformist and spineless to do it, even if they wanted to.

[Oisín]

Originally Posted by tooki

But I do respect that a person should be able to decide for themselves and not have (legal) limitations imposed by others. (For example, if you want to get certain heavy body modifications, in most countries you have to go to an underground practitioner -- with the risk that that entails -- because a professional doctor won't do it for legal reasons. Nobody wins.)

This part I definitely agree with. They have every right to do this to themselves—I just hope they don’t expect me to understand why they do it, or to consider that they’re doing it for themselves, more than to themselves.

Edit: This part from Cat’s site gives his motivations—not a reason I can really understand, but at least something I can see as a sort of logical incentive:

I am Huron and Lakota and in following a very old Huron Tradition I am transforming myself into my totem, a tiger.

[Doofy]

Originally Posted by Cat

I am Huron and Lakota and in following a very old Huron Tradition I am transforming myself into my totem, a tiger.

Yeah, I've often seen Huron with flowing blonde hair.

In fact, every time I see someone with blonde hair I have to ask myself whether they're Huron or not. It gets real difficult on trips to the Scandies, I can tell ya.

Let's translate Cat's words:

Originally Posted by Cat

I am a complete saddo who nobody ever paid any attention to before I opted to make myself look like an idiot. If I were into reincarnation it's obvious that my past lives would various be those of Henry VIII, George Washington and that dude off the Last Of The Mohicans film who bagged the hot chick by being really intense. Look at me. Look at me. Look at me.

There ya go. I said it.

[tooki]

Maybe, or maybe not.

Contrary to what LOTS of people assume, I don't get pierced or tattooed or pick nice clothes or a fun haircut for others, I do it for me. It's nice to pay attention to yourself, in whatever ways feel good for you.

[ghporter]

Originally Posted by tooki 

As for why someone would want to become a cat or whatever:
Honestly? I don't know!

I would want to become a cat in MY HOME, but otherwise, I'll stick with human!

Lakota and Huron together? Interesting combination... I'm part Cherokee myself (I got the cheekbones too), but while I'm quite attuned with my own totem, I think keeping it symbolic is important.

[moonmonkey]

Originally Posted by tooki 

Sorry, but "there must be abuse" is just an a non-modified person's justification for their own prejudice. You don't want it for yourself, and can't understand why anyone else would, and so rather than trying to understand (or asking!), you try to come up with "sensible" explanations so that you can continue feeding your fear and confusion.

Not really, there is plenty of evidence pointing towards the fact people do this to draw attention to themselves because of unresolved anger issues. Many of these issues stem from childhood abuse of varying forms. I understand you see that as a myth as this was not the case with you, but you are biased.

I'm not saying all people with body mods were abused, but I bet there is higher rate of childhood abuse amongst people that do this, than don't. The fact that you have researched amongst your modified friends whether they were abused points towards the likelihood that you are aware of this link too.

[slugslugslug]

It means he’s aware of claims that there’s a link. Meantime, saying “there is plenty of evidence” is not the same as actually presenting any. Got any studies to cite?

[ghporter]

Some people do get into body modification for reasons moonmonkey cited. But attributing these reasons to even a significant percentage of body modifiers is either overly simplistic or something less savory. EVERYONE wants to stand out and be unique; it's part of the development of one's personality. In certain circumstances, some people find that dress, jewelery, hair and makeup are not enough to create a unique image, and they go beyond that.

Now I personally think that things like photographs reproduced in a tattoo are a generally bad idea, considering that most tattooists are not "artists," and most photo-tats I've seen have been, well awful. I also think that rather extreme body modification by rather young people can be a big mistake, because many of these modifications are not easy to reverse and a young person's personality changes with time as he/she matures; one may think that sharpened teeth and ear lobes you can put your fist through would be extremely cool at 20, then be very unhappy with the public's reaction to this level of individuality at 25.

Keep in mind that I have zero tattoos and only a single piercing in each ear lobe; I'm hardly an expert on this. But I think I can represent "open minded" non-modifiers in my reactions.

[tooki]

Originally Posted by moonmonkey 

Not really, there is plenty of evidence pointing towards the fact people do this to draw attention to themselves because of unresolved anger issues. Many of these issues stem from childhood abuse of varying forms. I understand you see that as a myth as this was not the case with you, but you are biased.

I'm not saying all people with body mods were abused, but I bet there is higher rate of childhood abuse amongst people that do this, than don't. The fact that you have researched amongst your modified friends whether they were abused points towards the likelihood that you are aware of this link too.

Care to support these claims?

The fact that I've looked into it is a RESPONSE to people's prejudice, not a proactive measure.

What I do see in common in the parents of modded people is that a lot of them are less restrictive than many. They may not like it, but they allow their kids to express themselves.

[tooki]

Originally Posted by ghporter 

1. Some people do get into body modification for reasons moonmonkey cited. But attributing these reasons to even a significant percentage of body modifiers is either overly simplistic or something less savory. EVERYONE wants to stand out and be unique; it's part of the development of one's personality. In certain circumstances, some people find that dress, jewelery, hair and makeup are not enough to create a unique image, and they go beyond that.

2. Now I personally think that things like photographs reproduced in a tattoo are a generally bad idea, considering that most tattooists are not "artists," and most photo-tats I've seen have been, well awful.

3. I also think that rather extreme body modification by rather young people can be a big mistake, because many of these modifications are not easy to reverse and a young person's personality changes with time as he/she matures; one may think that sharpened teeth and ear lobes you can put your fist through would be extremely cool at 20, then be very unhappy with the public's reaction to this level of individuality at 25.

1. Mind you, that also is only a part of it. I don't actually much care to stand out. To me, standing out is (or at least, originally was, more on this later) an undesired side effect. My motivation is... to be me. To myself. Not to others. I like it, and I feel more like I am being true to myself. I can't really explain it much beyond that.

In the mean time, I've actually come to see standing out as having its upsides, too. Since the overwhelming majority of people who interact with me have positive experiences, not only do I have a memorable appearance that they won't soon forget, should they see me again, but I also help shatter their prejudices that a significantly pierced and tattooed person has to be a stoned starving artist loser (which unfortunately many people believe). I am articulate, knowledgeable and educated, and this often surprises people. (And I don't smoke or do drugs, though the stress of living in Switzerland is making weed look awfully tempting.) But if they ever needed to come back and buy something more, even if they forgot my name, they would ask for me by appearance. Seriously.

2. I would challenge that a lot of modern tattoo artists are real artists. My tattoo artist was a trained illustrator with a fine arts background, and these days, that's not uncommon. (And trained or not, many of them are fine artists.) Portraits are notoriously difficult to get right, of course, regardless of the medium.

3. You'd think, but what you tend to hear from older tattoo owners is not that they regret having gotten their early tattoos, but if anything, that they regret the quality of their early tattoos, since many of them were rebellious young'uns who just wanted to get ink and didn't think it through very well. A significant proportion of the tattoo removals performed are not done with the goal of clearing the skin per se, but rather just to lighten a poorly-executed or small tattoo enough that a better tattoo can be applied over it.

Today, you see a (to me, shocking) number of kids getting serious ink, like full sleeves, etc. You don't do that on a whim, and you can't pick those off the "flash" on the wall. You sit down with an artist and work out a concept. Big tattoo pieces are what artists like to do, because they have a lot more artistic input, so they take more pride in those pieces and do better work. (The small sh•t is what pays the bills, alas.) Those kids are not likely to regret big pieces.

FWIW, I'm jealous of those kids, I did not have the balls to commit to something that big. Hats off. (And now I don't have the money. Argh!)

[wallinbl]

Originally Posted by tooki 

For example, if you want to get certain heavy body modifications, in most countries you have to go to an underground practitioner -- with the risk that that entails -- because a professional doctor won't do it for legal reasons. Nobody wins.

I don't think a professional doctor should be doing breast augmentation, either. It's not a medical procedure, and it does nothing to improve health or heal the body. To be separate from medicine is not a statement of quality. There is little preventing the modification industry from organizing, creating standards and certifying practitioners. Like any other industry, greasing a few politicians will get you laws requiring certification from some agreed upon body. Even people cutting hair have this.

And I certainly respect somebody having the guts to do it despite the repercussions they will undoubtedly face. Most people are, frankly, much too conformist and spineless to do it, even if they wanted to.

For me, it's not conformity. My problem is with the permanence of it. I've never held an interest for very long, so a tattoo or other permanent modification is guaranteed to bore me in a few months at most. I've had several piercings, none of which lasted longer than a year.

[tooki]

Originally Posted by wallinbl 

1. I don't think a professional doctor should be doing breast augmentation, either. It's not a medical procedure, and it does nothing to improve health or heal the body. To be separate from medicine is not a statement of quality. There is little preventing the modification industry from organizing, creating standards and certifying practitioners. Like any other industry, greasing a few politicians will get you laws requiring certification from some agreed upon body. Even people cutting hair have this.


2. For me, it's not conformity. My problem is with the permanence of it. I've never held an interest for very long, so a tattoo or other permanent modification is guaranteed to bore me in a few months at most. I've had several piercings, none of which lasted longer than a year.

1. Association of Professional Piercers

Also, in many states, body modification practitioners have actively helped create quality, training, certification, and sanitation standards for piercing and tattoo establishments. (In many states, piercing and tattoo shops are held to higher hygiene standards than doctors' offices. No joke.)

2. OK, but that's not everyone. If the permanence isn't for you, fine. Don't get anything permanent. For me, the permanence is a huge part of the appeal.

(I am not big into fashion or hair, which have arguably more to do with my appearance than my body mods. Also, many of my mods are completely hidden under clothing, so it has nothing to do with projecting an image to others, temporarily or permanently.)

[tooki]

Originally Posted by wallinbl 

I don't think a professional doctor should be doing breast augmentation, either. It's not a medical procedure, and it does nothing to improve health or heal the body.

That is highly debatable. If a person feels better after undergoing the procedure, is that not a desirable improvement of [mental] health?

Just because it's not something you want (or understand) doesn't mean you should decide for others what they should and should not be allowed to do.

Edit: And finally, there's the blunt aspect of harm reduction: some people are going to want certain body mods no matter what (be it something our culture considers OK, like a boob job, or something considered abnormal, like a split tongue or voluntary castration). If you outlaw it (which completely disrespects the individual's rights over their own body), and thus prevent people with training from performing the procedures, you force it underground. (We saw this with abortions decades ago.) An untrained practitioner will always pose a greater risk. The pragmatic standpoint is to reduce the risk of harm as much as possible. That means allowing even "undesirable" voluntary procedures to be carried out by professionals.

[wallinbl]

Originally Posted by tooki 

That is highly debatable. If a person feels better after undergoing the procedure, is that not a desirable improvement of [mental] health?

Just because it's not something you want (or understand) doesn't mean you should decide for others what they should and should not be allowed to do.

I didn't say that people shouldn't have it done. I think that it keeps the ethics of medicine simpler and more clear to focus it on health and healing. Enhancement is another thing altogether, which I am not making a qualitative statement about. You want to get your boobs or ass done, have at it, but I see that as a separate field from medicine.

[tooki]

OK, but who then? Right now, our laws are set up that only medical professionals are allowed to cut open the skin. If we call it something else, but with equivalent training, fine, whatever.

Besides, is it ethical to deny someone a procedure that would render that individual happier, regardless of whether it would make you (the practitioner) happy?

Right now, I submit that the current practice of only performing socially acceptable (but in fact riskier) aesthetic procedures is more unethical.

See also the edit i made above, while you were responding.

[RAILhead]

Six hours for permanence by a real artist:




In 50 years, I'll still love it.

[tooki]

Very nice.

[Paco500]

Originally Posted by tooki 

And I certainly respect somebody having the guts to do it despite the repercussions they will undoubtedly face. Most people are, frankly, much too conformist and spineless to do it, even if they wanted to.

That's a fairly arrogant view of the world. There are those of us whose self image is not tied up in how we look. That's not conformist and spineless, it's different.

How about I don't criticize your motives for modifying your appearance and you don't criticize my decision not to?

[tooki]

Umm, how is it arrogant? I belong to the group that's too conformist and spineless to turn myself into a cat or lizard or zombie or whatever, even if I wanted to. THAT was the context of that line.