[cheerios]

A rant, by the long-lost cheers:

Moral of this story: never do favors for friends that involve money.

reason?

well. where to start... Mike, who I've known for 4 years, needed a place to stay, during fall-semester, when he'd graduate. He went to great pains to convince us that it would be cheaper for us in the long run to get a 2 bedroom and share rent with us for the first 8 months, then to get a 2 bedroom or studio on our own. And we went along with it. He promised to pay half the rent, and 1/3 utilities, and all was well. Then, it became "well I'm not really getting half the apartment, so it's not fair that i have to pay half the rent" so it was adjusted a bit... ok, stillalright. Then comes time to move out.

Mike would leave notes for me on my door (we slept rather later than him), and I awoke to one the beginning of thanksgiving break, informing me that he would not be paying rent for his last month, and instead consider that the re-payment of his portion of the deposit. There was no "is this okay?" or "may I" just "I'm not paying rent." Lease is in my name, not his. I am NOT ok with that. So, I inform him that he can either pay rent, or move out early, at which point, he threatens to sue me. (He's a lawyers spawn, and spoiled, to boot). I didn't budge, and he gave in, writing me a 145 check for the portion of the month he was planning on staying.

The week before he left, i requested payment for the bills he'd neglected to pay, and he flat-out refused. Informed me that he was getting his deposit back one way or another (I offered to mail him a check when I got said deposit back, I'm a college student ,I don't have money floating around!!), and he refused.

In the end, i was out about 60 bucks, and a doorknob(long story, don't ask), and I figured It would be better to cut my losses.

...Until yesterday. Yesterday I recieved my NSF Check and Delinquent Fees notice, and my 3-day Pay or Quit notice. What, you ask? Yes, I pay my rent every month, and on time. Mike's been gone since early December.... what's going on??

I Tromped myself down to the office to find that out, only to be told that Mike kindly stopped payment on the last month's rent check he wrote me, and i gave the rental-office. So... I'm looking at 145 in missing rent, a 25 dollar non-sufficent funds fee, and a 35 dollar late fee. plus the 60 in utilities I sucked up earlier, I'm now out 265 dollars. all for helping out a friend.

NEVER AGAIN.

[Lateralus]

Holy crap. That... sucks.

A friend is still a friend, until he ****s with your money. At which point he becomes an enemy. Kick his ass.

[coolmacdude]

You should sue him, seriously.

You don't need a lawyer. Small claims court will work fine (and its cheap to file a suit there, usually less than $50).

Plus if you win (how could you not) he can pay the legal fees too.

[cheerios]

it's 22 bucks, and i'm thinking about it. lots of other things going on in my life right now, and i have to track him down, first. :/

[thePurpleGiant]

Originally posted by cheerios:
it's 22 bucks, and i'm thinking about it. lots of other things going on in my life right now, and i have to track him down, first. :/

Do it!! Also, setup a PayPal donation thingemedo - I will put $2US into the fund for you to take him to court. I hate scumbags, and this is my contribution to making the world a better place.

Seriously, you open a PayPal account - If 10 people put in $2US you have your court fee paid anyway

[RedStar]

Originally posted by thePurpleGiant:
Do it!! Also, setup a PayPal donation thingemedo - I will put $2US into the fund for you to take him to court. I hate scumbags, and this is my contribution to making the world a better place.

Seriously, you open a PayPal account - If 10 people put in $2US you have your court fee paid anyway

11 people

[gorickey]

Originally posted by RedStar:
11 people

12 people...you guys are forgetting PayPal's cut off the balance...a 12th person will cover it...

[Cipher13]

I gotta disagree with the "friends" thing, and just say... he wasn't much of a "friend" really

[mike one]

Originally posted by coolmacdude:
You should sue him, seriously.

You don't need a lawyer. Small claims court will work fine (and its cheap to file a suit there, usually less than $50).

Plus if you win (how could you not) he can pay the legal fees too.

if you have the time, you should conisder small claims court, seriously.

[waxcrash]

Sorry to hear about your situation. This 'Mike' is a real lowlife.

Sounds like you only had a 'verbal' contract with him and not a written one. Verbal contracts are valid, but are hard to prove if you don't have a witness. If you end up in small claims court, your so called friend can claim that they never agreed to pay you. Then it's up to the judge to decide.

I was in a situation where a lent someone $500 and was promised to be payed back in two weeks. This was 7 years ago and I never got my money back. I learned my lesson and now if someone needs to borrow money I make sure it is in writing and a witness is present when it is signed.

[Agasthya]

Originally posted by waxcrash:
Sorry to hear about your situation. This 'Mike' is a real lowlife.

Sounds like you only had a 'verbal' contract with him and not a written one. Verbal contracts are valid, but are hard to prove if you don't have a witness. If you end up in small claims court, your so called friend can claim that they never agreed to pay you. Then it's up to the judge to decide.

Well obviously a problem for good ol' Mike is the check that he issued to Cheerios. He can claim he never agreed to pay her, but then the Judge will start asking why he gave her a check.

[Turias]

Take him to Judge Judy!

[daimoni]

Originally posted by cheerios:
I Tromped myself down to the office to find that out, only to be told that Mike kindly stopped payment on the last month's rent check he wrote me, and i gave the rental-office. So... I'm looking at 145 in missing rent, a 25 dollar non-sufficent funds fee, and a 35 dollar late fee. plus the 60 in utilities I sucked up earlier, I'm now out 265 dollars. all for helping out a friend.

NEVER AGAIN.

All I can say is, this type of thing has happened to me in my youth. On more than one occasion, I'll admit. But I no longer associate with those type of people.

Funny how it's almost always the so-called friends "who come from money" who're the first ones to stiff you at the drop of a dime.

Learning who your true friends are is worth many times more than the money you're trying to recoup.

That said, do you need me to drive up to Stockton to shake the bounder by the ankles... and show him what for?

[mitchell_pgh]

I would cut my losses...

Like Cipher said, he obviously wasn't a real friend or he wouldn't have done that to you. To stop payment on a check is a very calculated move. Don't go after him or you will waste HOURS of your life and gain a nice enemy.

You made a mistake when you let him start writing you notes. It's best to talk about everything person to person. I have found that with one on one conversations, cooler heads always prevail.

[spiky_dog]

Originally posted by mitchell_pgh:
I would cut my losses...

Like Cipher said, he obviously wasn't a real friend or he wouldn't have done that to you. To stop payment on a check is a very calculated move. Don't go after him or you will waste HOURS of your life and gain a nice enemy.

You made a mistake when you let him start writing you notes. It's best to talk about everything person to person. I have found that with one on one conversations, cooler heads always prevail.

i disagree. take him to small claims court, otherwise he wins by being a jerk. and that's not right.

[fizzlemynizzle]

sue him in small claims, take his ass down. wapner will not have that crap in his courtroom.

[Spliffdaddy]

You learned a lesson that was worth far more than its mere $265 tuition.

Could the time you'll spend in an effort to recoup your smallish loss be used for a more worthwhile endeavor?

I think it could. Life is too valuable to waste on something that won't make a significant difference in your future. While $265 might help you this week or this month, it will never compensate for the time you've already wasted, plan to waste, and the mental torment this has caused you.

The lesson was a bargain.

Be happy with that.

[fizzlemynizzle]

Originally posted by Spliffdaddy:
You learned a lesson that was worth far more than its mere $265 tuition.

Could the time you'll spend in an effort to recoup your smallish loss be used for a more worthwhile endeavor?

I think it could. Life is too valuable to waste on something that won't make a significant difference in your future. While $265 might help you this week or this month, it will never compensate for the time you've already wasted, plan to waste, and the mental torment this has caused you.

The lesson was a bargain.

Be happy with that.

And being held responsible for his actions by the courts would teach the roommate a lesson, and he's the one who is in need of one.

[Spliffdaddy]

Originally posted by fizzlemynizzle:
And being held responsible for his actions by the courts would teach the roommate a lesson, and he's the one who is in need of one.

Yes, it probably would teach him a lesson.

Although cheerios isn't obligated to insure the future integrity and character of her fellow citizens - it's well within her right to attempt to do so.

My advice would be to put the loss of $265 behind her, keep her activities directed to more worthwhile goals, and leave her ex-roommate's punishment up to fate and karma and such. Life has some lessons to learn for him, as well. And it's a far better teacher than you or I or judge Joseph A. Wapner.

[olePigeon]

You got it easy, try buying a truck for a friend who promises to buy it from you in payments because he doesn't have the credit to buy one outright.

[cheerios]

Originally posted by daimoni:
All I can say is, this type of thing has happened to me in my youth. On more than one occasion, I'll admit. But I no longer associate with those type of people.

Funny how it's almost always the so-called friends "who come from money" who're the first ones to stiff you at the drop of a dime.

Learning who your true friends are is worth many times more than the money you're trying to recoup.

That said, do you need me to drive up to Stockton to shake the bounder by the ankles... and show him what for?

LOL he's actually (presumably) out by you... my best friend, when I told her, said "Do you want him sliced height-wise or width-wise?"

Haven't made a decision about taking him to court yet. It's evidently quite a bitch to actually collect on a judgement, so even though I have what I consider to be a pretty open-and-shut case... It's not gonna get me much. What it WOULD do, however, is mark his Credit Report. So... is my time worth the revenge that would gain me, when he goes to buy a car, hvaing his credit report say "Mike doesn't pay money he owes people"? I dunno.

I'm definately sending him a request in writing demanding payment, though... I'm tired of this ****, and technically, for cancelled checks you can collect 4x what their value was... Problem is, the check was written directly to the apartment complex. I'm just the one who was "responsible" for seeing it was a good check.

[vmarks]

Originally posted by cheerios:
A rant, by the long-lost cheers:

Moral of this story: never do favors for friends that involve money.

Money given to friends is just that- money given.

Never expect to get it back in the first place and you'll feel a lot better about it in the end.

Don't buy cars from friends either, for similar reasons. It just gets messy and colors the friendship when things don't work out in the best of all possible ways.

[timster]

I would suggest you go to small claims. It's actually pretty painless. I've done it before when my ex-landlord decided to stiff me on the security deposit.

All I had to do was head to city hall, fill out a form, pay a fee (which was about $20), then I got the court date that same day. The court will then issue a notification to the defendant to show up in court that day.

Then when that day rolled around, I just put on a shirt and tie, went in court explained my side of the story, the landlord ranted on about his side, the judge threw the book at him and I got my $650 back, plus all filing fees I paid.

I thought about asking the judge to also include the two quarters that I had plugged in the parking meter that morning as part of my recompensation, but I decided not to appear too smarmy.

And the OTHER thing is that you do get a certain satisifaction out of it, a nice and neat conclusion out of it. Some people here suggest just sucking up and moving on. That's one way, but that kind of thing would gnaw on me for a while. There's something to be said about that too.

Just my two cents.

[timster]

Oh yeah, and if you do go, bring that cancelled check, and your bank statements, and all the notes he wrote to you, and any email printouts that you might have where he could have said something along the lines of "moving in together", "paying the rent", etc.

The more paperwork you have, the more likely the judge will find in your favor.

[Krusty]

Perhaps a 1st for me: I agree with both vmarks and SpliffDaddy on an issue.
Chalk it up as a learning experience and if you do ever find yourself in the same position be sure to get explicit understanding and agreement (even a written one, if you think its necessary) between you and the "friend" moving in. I speak this from many years experience renting a beach house (that I still live in today) and subletting to several people over the years (some were strangers, some old friends). I found out exactly what the rights/status/obligations of all parties are due to a coupla instances of people failing to pay rent and/or utilities. The laws may be different where you live, but probably not by much.

Basically, despite what is right or fair, you really have no case to make in a small claims court. Timster's example doesn't apply in your case ... his dispute was between a renter and a landlord. Your dispute is between two people who had a verbal agreement. Few or NONE of the "rules of renting" that you may think apply here actually do. Records of payments he made to your or the apartment complex carry no weight, I'll go into more detail if you care to hear it.

[Orion27]

I think your being a little insensitive. After all, your friend is a college student just like you.
Do you expect him to go live out on the street? The right thing to do was to let him stay on. He doesn't lose his rights just because he can't pay. Your lucky he didn't sue you. There's due process and he could have stayed on several months more depending on the jurisdiction. The court system is terrible slow in some places. Where is your sense of decency man! As for the others who posted here, the indignation offered and the retribution sanctioned here is appalling. This is another human being we're talking about. The next thing you know some of you will be demanding payback. Don't you people have any shame? Instead of taking up paypal to take this poor person to court, you all should look real hard at yourselves and maybe try offering a hand-up. Instead of two dollars, there should be a law that requires everybody to pay a percentage of gross college expenses just for cases like this. How is he going to make good grades if he doesn't have a place to live? And if he has younger brothers or sisters what's going to happen to them if they happen to see him on the street, homeless. My god, think of the children!

[disectamac]

If you let a friend use money and the friend has the intention of paying it back but then due to unforseen circumstances is unable to pay it back then it's ok. In this sense I agree with some of us here in that hey, I knew there might be chance of being unable to collect the money back, I knew that when I let the friend use the money in the first place.

Cheerios, you may have been a friend to this guy Mike but he was NO friend to you. Friends don't run scams on each other, and from your story, it sounds like a calculated, selfish, I don't really give a damn about cheerios, I'm keeping my money scam. And he probably laughed all the way to the bank. That's no friend.

If it were me I would skip the courts and handle this thing face to face if you get my drift

[waxcrash]

Originally posted by Orion27:
My god, think of the children!

Last time I checked, college students are adults. But you do bring an interesting humanitarian perspective to this situation.

[disectamac]

Originally posted by Orion27:
I think your being a little insensitive. After all, your friend is a college student just like you.
Do you expect him to go live out on the street? The right thing to do was to let him stay on. He doesn't lose his rights just because he can't pay. Your lucky he didn't sue you. There's due process and he could have stayed on several months more depending on the jurisdiction. The court system is terrible slow in some places. Where is your sense of decency man! As for the others who posted here, the indignation offered and the retribution sanctioned here is appalling. This is another human being we're talking about. The next thing you know some of you will be demanding payback. Don't you people have any shame? Instead of taking up paypal to take this poor person to court, you all should look real hard at yourselves and maybe try offering a hand-up. Instead of two dollars, there should be a law that requires everybody to pay a percentage of gross college expenses just for cases like this. How is he going to make good grades if he doesn't have a place to live? And if he has younger brothers or sisters what's going to happen to them if they happen to see him on the street, homeless. My god, think of the children!

I'm not unsympothetic to your point of view, but not being able to afford room and board doesn't give anyone the right to cheat others out of their money. There are right ways and wrong ways to resolving these types of housing problems. This was clearly the wrong way.

[dampeoples]

I'm broke too, and can appreciate having all the money that's owed to me. But in this case, unless you know where this fellow is - let karma handle it. Let it be a lesson to you as well. If you do know where he is, often the threat of claims court is enough for them to pay, considering the shame of being served, not to mention the fact that if he's graduated he's probably looking for a job or just starting one. Either way taking time off for a court appearance against him will look bad
On another note - call the people you owe money to, if you have even a decent track record of paying your bills in a timely manner, they'll listen, and possibly even waive some fees. Just be sure to pay them like you said you would, it'll carry you a long way.

[Krusty]

Originally posted by disectamac:

Cheerios, you may have been a friend to this guy Mike but he was NO friend to you. Friends don't run scams on each other, and from your story, it sounds like a calculated, selfish, I don't really give a damn about cheerios, I'm keeping my money scam. And he probably laughed all the way to the bank. That's no friend.

If it were me I would skip the courts and handle this thing face to face if you get my drift

I agree (again). This is an issue between "friends". You're going to be banging your head against a wall if you think you have actual legal recourse in this instance. Don't want to sound too much like an old fart ... but this is where you start learning to differentiate between people of honor and people who skate by in life. I had 4 roommates who stiffed me in my years at the beach. 2 of them, on there own recognizance, eventually paid me back -- long after I'd written the money off and had quit bothering asking them for it. Coincidentally, both of the two who paid what they owed have gone on to big and great things in life ... the other two are still fuc%ing around. If Mike has any hope as a human being, he will pay what he owes. If not, you're never going to see what he owes. Best of luck Cheerios. Ya know we luv ya here sweetie.

[iWrite]

Have a Paypal account?

I'll send you some $$$. No problemo.



Had a "roommate" named Ariel once. My significant other and I let her live with us and our baby when we were in college. Well, Ariel did all kinds of things...and was always sorry about it later.

We were working three jobs between us, taking care of an infant, the whole thing. Then Ariel runs up a $500+ telephone bill. We got upset. Came home one day and she'd STOLEN my clothes and some other items of value and some of sentimental value and moved out.

Well, I made it a point to start calling the numbers on the long distance bill and was able to glean enough information to call her father. Her father was an attorney. I knew that threatening him would never work. But, I did call him and tell him about our poverty and how we'd tried to be his daughter's friend and what she'd done. That was on a Friday afternoon.

On Saturday morning at about 6:00 AM there was a knock on the door. I opened it and there was a middle-aged man with big plastic garbage bags in his hand. It was Ariel's father and he'd made it a point to gather all of our belongings together and bring them back. He also had a check for over $700 for her portion of the rent and the telephone bills.

VERY NICE GUY.

He said that he daughter was "screwed up in the head" and he'd "deal with her." Never heard from her again and that was that.

Anyway, seriously, I'll send you some $$$. Just gotta have your Paypal account email address.

Good luck with the college education!

[cheerios]

Originally posted by Orion27:
I think your being a little insensitive. After all, your friend is a college student just like you

yup, only his dad's a lawyer and mine's middle-management.

Do you expect him to go live out on the street? The right thing to do was to let him stay on.

just to clarify, he stayed on just as long as we agreed he would. He moved out on the 13th of december, which he informed ME would be his last day.

He doesn't lose his rights just because he can't pay. Your lucky he didn't sue you. There's due process and he could have stayed on several months more depending on the jurisdiction. The court system is terrible slow in some places. Where is your sense of decency man!

Actually, the agreement was for him to stay till the end of december. 8 months. HE decided to leave earlier.

As for the others who posted here, the indignation offered and the retribution sanctioned here is appalling. This is another human being we're talking about. The next thing you know some of you will be demanding payback. Don't you people have any shame? Instead of taking up paypal to take this poor person to court, you all should look real hard at yourselves and maybe try offering a hand-up. Instead of two dollars, there should be a law that requires everybody to pay a percentage of gross college expenses just for cases like this. How is he going to make good grades if he doesn't have a place to live?

Believe me, he was renting a full house before he came to live with us... he's not some poor bereft soul.

And if he has younger brothers or sisters what's going to happen to them if they happen to see him on the street, homeless. My god, think of the children!

younger sib is a freshman in college & a stoner. Definately took a hint from her bro & swung to the other end of the pendelum.

I understand what you're saying, but I have to feel a bit indignant about doing someone a FAVOR and getting slapped in the face over it.

[daimoni]

.

[cheerios]

sweet offer and good story iWrite... I've actually considered conting his parents, also...

as for paypal, yes I have an acct, but i'm not in dire straights, so, if you're interested in helping someone who NEEDS it, go find a charity to drop a few bucks towards or something. I've got my parents helping me out and a piddly job I work for some 10 bucks a week, and Juan's here still as well. Honestly, I'm still pissed off to hell, but I dunno if it's WORTH it to bother suing. MY time is more valuable than 200 bucks. I would DEARLY love to tatoo "untrustworthy" across his forehead, but... :shrug: It takes a bit more time and effort than I think I have right now.

I probably could find him, no problem. Worst case, I could call his parents and ask for a forwarding address... but it just seems... futile, somehow. :/

[ghotirking]

Ah Hell, just post his picture on the internet somewhere...news groups, perhaps. alt.binaries.hot.monkey.love or something. People photochop and post all the time.

[sworthy]

Tough luck guys... sorry to hear about the situation. Let me know if I can have the obligatory family member beat down on the ex roomie.