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karolie · Jan 4, 2009, 11:22 PM

Originally Posted by turtle777

Well, uhm, and men aren't ?

I think the superficiality resides in most people of both sexes.

-t

true.!

karolie · Jan 4, 2009, 11:27 PM

Originally Posted by ghporter

Gentlemen want ladies. .

My wife said that one of the very first things I did that endeared me to her was instead of grabbing her hand as we walked together, I offered her my arm. That gave her the option of taking it or ignoring it. (I was too scared to just grab her hand. I didn't want her to think I "expected" anything but her conversation.) She is indeed a lady, through and through. But here's the payoff: that fourth condition? If you find the right person, she turns out to be super ultra mega HAWT whether you noticed it at first or not.

And ladies want Gentlemen. Boy we do! haha
Yes. Guys, offer your arm. <3.<3

selowitch · Jan 4, 2009, 11:37 PM

My wife is definitely my "ideal partner": She's kind, funny, smart, sexy, and a great Mom to our two kids. She's also a terrific wife and daughter-in-law to boot. What can I say? I got really lucky.

Railroader · Jan 5, 2009, 12:19 AM

Originally Posted by ghporter

Poor confidence can come from prior experience, especially with those shallow "cute girls at school" that treat earnest guys like they have a pox if they don't have a hot car, lots of money, or other stuff the superficial ones go for. It's a vicious thing.

But you're right, confidence comes through—and overcomes, whether the guy looks like Hugh Jackman or Jack Klugman. The real trick is not to have your knees permanently knocked out from under you when you're a kid.

Who cares where it comes from. Low confidence will kill any guy's chances. Fake it if you have to, but girls don't date guys without confidence.

I am a perfect example. I dated very attractive, intelligent, popular girls, yet I was beyond average looks, slightly balding, and a little overweight. But, I have confidence. One of my girlfriends in high school was the homecoming queen and ended up becoming a doctor and doing research at a major university.

ghporter · Jan 5, 2009, 10:05 PM

Originally Posted by Railroader

Who cares where it comes from. Low confidence will kill any guy's chances. Fake it if you have to, but girls don't date guys without confidence.

Faking it is harder or easier depending on where it comes from... That's really the only reason to care. Being slapped down hard enough to make your teeth rattle is harder to overcome than just worrying about your breath... Great example of getting past "expectations" though. I always thought I pretty closely resembled Quasimodo until I had the gumption to approach this lovely thing. Many years later, we've been married for a very long time and we're very happy. Confidence was something I had to simulate, but only until she showed me that I didn't need to simulate anything.

SpaceMonkey · Jan 5, 2009, 10:53 PM

Originally Posted by ghporter

But here's the payoff: that fourth condition? If you find the right person, she turns out to be super ultra mega HAWT whether you noticed it at first or not.

I had that once, but it didn't work out and left me extremely cynical. So now my ideal partner is me. I'm quite the catch.

selowitch · Jan 5, 2009, 11:36 PM

I'm happily married and totally off-the-market, thank God. But a curiosity remains: What is it with some women and "bad boys"? Why do some find the jerk who treats them like garbage to be so irresistible?

Railroader · Jan 6, 2009, 02:03 AM

Originally Posted by ghporter

Faking it is harder or easier depending on where it comes from... That's really the only reason to care. Being slapped down hard enough to make your teeth rattle is harder to overcome than just worrying about your breath... Great example of getting past "expectations" though. I always thought I pretty closely resembled Quasimodo until I had the gumption to approach this lovely thing. Many years later, we've been married for a very long time and we're very happy. Confidence was something I had to simulate, but only until she showed me that I didn't need to simulate anything.

Have it, fake it, or die lonely. It ALL has to do with confidence.

Chuckit · Jan 6, 2009, 04:14 AM

Originally Posted by selowitch

I'm happily married and totally off-the-market, thank God. But a curiosity remains: What is it with some women and "bad boys"? Why do some find the jerk who treats them like garbage to be so irresistible?

Some women just have crap taste, but I think a lot of the perception that women like "bad boys" is a misconception. Women like men who seem confident and dominant. These traits come naturally to "bad boys" but not as much to normal guys who have some sense of propriety and/or humility. The good guys I've known who have had that bad-boy confidence seem to do about as well.

Laminar · Jan 6, 2009, 10:55 AM

Originally Posted by Railroader

Have it, fake it, or die lonely. It ALL has to do with confidence.

I'll second this. About two weeks after I decided to pretend like I actually liked who I was I had piles of girls falling over themselves for me. And now I'm even starting to believe it too.

Powerbook · Jan 6, 2009, 03:46 PM

Originally Posted by Chuckit

The good guys I've known who have had that bad-boy confidence seem to do about as well.

What would that be, actually?

The good accountant working 9 to 5 and driving a Ford Taurus who approaches a group of ladies with a "Whassup biatches, I capped a coupla Niggas and did time in Folsom, wanna meet a bad boi with d0pe and flash in his pockets!!!" ?

Regards
PB.

Chuckit · Jan 6, 2009, 04:16 PM

I think maybe we have different ideas of what "bad boys" are.

Powerbook · Jan 6, 2009, 04:48 PM

Originally Posted by Chuckit

I think maybe we have different ideas of what "bad boys" are.

I have no idea at all, that's why I'm asking.
People around here are typically either good or they are the 5% the other 95% of the population (male or female) stays away from. But maybe Germans are different.

Regards,
PB.

Zeeb · Jan 6, 2009, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by sdilley14

With all of these threads lately with pictures of hot young men with hot young women and people throwing out advice on how to pick someone up, I'm curious; What is your ideal type? What do you look for in a man/woman? I'm talking personality, looks, everything. Me personally...

Smart, kind, funny with a good sense of humor, down to earth, easy to talk to, likes to talk about more than what happened on The Hills last night, loyal, puts others in front of herself, caring, likes to go out and have fun/isn't a shut-in or act like a 50 year old trapped in a 24 year old body, is able to make friends with/is accepting of all types of people, cultures, lifestyles.

As far as looks go...I prefer dark, medium length hair. I definitely prefer curvey. Not gonna lie, I'm a bit of a boob guy, but nice proportionate curves are good. I like girls in glasses. I like nice, fair, clear skin (not too tan). I like her to be as natural looking as possible (with a bit of makeup of course). Straight, white teeth are important.

I posted this picture in the hot babes thread. This is about as close to my perfect woman as I can find.

Which of the above listed traits are more important than the others? It's hard to find someone who *exactly* matches what one has in mind.

Doofy · Jan 6, 2009, 07:23 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65BTdxWp95M

Oisín · Jan 6, 2009, 07:38 PM

Originally Posted by Laminar

I'll second this. About two weeks after I decided to pretend like I actually liked who I was I had piles of girls falling over themselves for me. And now I'm even starting to believe it too.

Hm. I guess I’m just not pretending hard enough, then.

Face Ache · Jan 6, 2009, 07:56 PM

Originally Posted by Powerbook

I have no idea at all, that's why I'm asking.
People around here are typically either good or they are the 5% the other 95% of the population (male or female) stays away from. But maybe Germans are different.

Regards,
PB.

Germans tend to keep dwarves dressed in bondage gear tied up in their basements, so the line between good/bad can often be blurry for them. If in doubt, consult the dwarf.

Oisín · Jan 6, 2009, 08:10 PM

Originally Posted by Face Ache

Germans tend to keep dwarves dressed in bondage gear tied up in their basements, so the line between good/bad can often be blurry for them. If in doubt, consult the dwarf.

I realise this is extremely crude and very, very inappropriate, and I do apologise in advance; I just couldn’t help it
No, that’s Austrians. God, I hope Elisabeth Fritzl doesn’t read MacNN

Jawbone54 · Jan 6, 2009, 08:51 PM

The quiet, mysterious types tend to do well also, albeit with a smaller (but usually smarter) range of women. If they're insecure quiet, then no...but quiet confidence is appealing for them as well.

SpaceMonkey · Jan 6, 2009, 11:00 PM

Originally Posted by Jawbone54

The quiet, mysterious types tend to do well also, albeit with a smaller (but usually smarter) range of women. If they're insecure quiet, then no...but quiet confidence is appealing for them as well.

George: But, but I'm disturbed! I'm depressed! I'm inadequate! I got it all!!