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Prepare for the rapture
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Rumor
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Jul 10, 2008, 02:25 AM
 
http://youvebeenleftbehind.com/

Seriously wtf? People actually pay for this ****.

Christians, would you pay for this service? If so, why?
I like my water with hops, malt, hops, yeast, and hops.
     
Randman
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Jul 10, 2008, 02:30 AM
 
I thought this had to do with the iPhone 2.0 software.


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Uncle Doof
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Jul 10, 2008, 05:15 AM
 
Originally Posted by Rumor View Post
Christians, would you pay for this service?
No.

Not unless they sent me pics of boobies to my inbox every day, anyways.


Something about that strikes me as a bit perverse and opportunist - making money by preying on the stupid sort of thing.
     
Rumor  (op)
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Jul 10, 2008, 05:25 AM
 
Originally Posted by Uncle Doof View Post
No.

Not unless they sent me pics of boobies to my inbox every day, anyways.


Something about that strikes me as a bit perverse and opportunist - making money by preying on the stupid sort of thing.
I was thinking something similar. If a "rapture" occurs and no one is left, how would they receive the email?
I like my water with hops, malt, hops, yeast, and hops.
     
Cipher13
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Jul 10, 2008, 05:35 AM
 
Who better to make money off?
     
Rumor  (op)
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Jul 10, 2008, 06:00 AM
 
Originally Posted by Cipher13 View Post
Who better to make money off?
Liberals are usually pretty gullible.
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Uncle Doof
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Jul 10, 2008, 06:24 AM
 
All the right-wingers are killing the planet! Give me all your money and I'll fix it!
     
Chuckit
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Jul 10, 2008, 10:24 AM
 
Originally Posted by Rumor View Post
I was thinking something similar. If a "rapture" occurs and no one is left, how would they receive the email?
If the rapture occurs and no one is left, that will mean everybody's together in Heaven, so it won't matter. This is based on the premise that there will still be some non-Christians at the end of the world. (Well, OK, it's actually based on the premise that Christians are idiots who will fall for a delightfully blatant con, but you know what I mean.)
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analogue SPRINKLES
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Jul 10, 2008, 03:45 PM
 
Originally Posted by Chuckit View Post
If the rapture occurs and no one is left, that will mean everybody's together in Heaven
Even the gays and Atheists?
     
Xoote
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Jul 10, 2008, 03:51 PM
 
i wonder how many people fall for that
:)
     
Uncle Doof
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Jul 10, 2008, 04:20 PM
 
Originally Posted by analogue SPRINKLES View Post
Even the gays and Atheists?
No, of course not. Silly.
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lpkmckenna
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Jul 10, 2008, 05:07 PM
 
The rapture is an unbiblical concept invented in the 19th century.
     
Atheist
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Jul 10, 2008, 05:09 PM
 
I just wish I had thought of it. (The website that is... not the rapture).
     
Chaos Theory
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Jul 11, 2008, 12:41 AM
 
I think I'm having deja-vu all over again.
     
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Jul 11, 2008, 01:05 AM
 
Originally Posted by Chaos Theory View Post
I think I'm having deja-vu all over again.
Me too. Make no bone about it.
     
Lava Lamp Freak
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Jul 11, 2008, 01:28 AM
 
Why pay for that crap, when you can get it for free?

http://www.raptureletters.com/
http://youtube.com/watch?v=IcVymEtVzEY
     
Luca Rescigno
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Jul 11, 2008, 02:05 AM
 
This is old.

Also, I thought it was a thread about BioShock 2.

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Randman
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Jul 11, 2008, 02:36 AM
 
If the good people are taken to Heaven and the bad are left here on Earth, the new Hell, then why would you want to email them anyways? Only reason I could see would be to say "SUCKER!" but then again, that probably would put them with the bad people.

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Jul 11, 2008, 09:14 AM
 
Originally Posted by rumor View Post
"christians" are usually pretty gullible.
fify
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ebuddy
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Jul 12, 2008, 09:19 AM
 
Originally Posted by lpkmckenna View Post
The rapture is an unbiblical concept invented in the 19th century.
The rapture is most definitely a Biblical concept. Whether the word itself is found, whether or not it has already happened, the intended audience, the host of debate surrounding the concept, or if you buy it is not relevant to any contextual definition of the basic principle.

John 14:1-3; "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am."

Revelation 3:10; "Since you have kept my command to endure patiently, I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth."

1 Thessalonians 4: 16-17; "For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever."

rapture; the carrying of a person to another place or sphere of existence.
ebuddy
     
Tiresias
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Jul 12, 2008, 09:47 AM
 
Perhaps it has already happened, and no one noticed, because everyone was left behind.
( Last edited by Tiresias; Jul 12, 2008 at 11:01 AM. )
     
Chuckit
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Jul 12, 2008, 10:42 AM
 
Originally Posted by ebuddy View Post
The rapture is most definitely a Biblical concept. Whether the word itself is found, whether or not it has already happened, the intended audience, the host of debate surrounding the concept, or if you buy it is not relevant to any contextual definition of the basic principle.

John 14:1-3; "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am."

Revelation 3:10; "Since you have kept my command to endure patiently, I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth."

1 Thessalonians 4: 16-17; "For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever."

rapture; the carrying of a person to another place or sphere of existence.
The Rapture is not merely the idea the some people will go to heaven. It's the idea that Christians will just be spontaneously taken away before the end of the world.
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chris v
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Jul 12, 2008, 05:37 PM
 
I'm all for separating a fool from his money, so long as it's done legally. Millennialists and young-earthters in particular.

When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. -- Jonathan Swift.
     
stwain2003
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Jul 12, 2008, 05:56 PM
 
Originally Posted by Rumor View Post
I was thinking something similar. If a "rapture" occurs and no one is left, how would they receive the email?
No, that is incorrect. The CHRISTIANS (followers of Christ's teachings) will be raptured, not the rest of the people. MY question is, if the service is run by Christians who will be gone, how are they going to send out the messages 6 days after? Do they have USB rapture sensors hooked up to their servers or something?
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Luca Rescigno
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Jul 12, 2008, 07:25 PM
 
When I heard about this a couple months ago I learned that what happens is they have a bunch of Christians running the thing that must log in every day. If enough of them go 3 or 5 days (don't remember the exact number) without logging in, it sends the emails.

Seems pretty arrogant, though, for the "blessed" people to point and laugh at the ones who didn't make it. And of course it only works if enough of the people working for this service get raptured.

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ironknee
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Jul 12, 2008, 10:23 PM
 
btw this is the difference between jesus and christianity

jesus preached that god was coming and soon

christianity preaches jesus is coming... big difference... jesus must be rolling in his grave
     
ebuddy
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Jul 13, 2008, 08:35 AM
 
Originally Posted by Chuckit View Post
The Rapture is not merely the idea the some people will go to heaven. It's the idea that Christians will just be spontaneously taken away before the end of the world.
So... the unbiblical concepts I've provided from Biblical text are allegorical?

I suppose it could happen after the end of the world, but then the Bible was pretty clear about the "alive in Christ". I guess it doesn't have to mean "Christians", but in Christ seems to suggest what we commonly refer to as Christians. While there is considerable debate on the intended audience and the timing of the event, "spontaneously taken away" also enjoys Biblical precedent in Matthew 24:40-41 for example and in 1 Corinthians 15:51-52.

You may not buy off on any of it and the notion may have been popularized in the 19th Century, but this doesn't mean the concept is unbiblical.
ebuddy
     
ebuddy
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Jul 13, 2008, 08:50 AM
 
Originally Posted by ironknee View Post
btw this is the difference between jesus and christianity

jesus preached that god was coming and soon

christianity preaches jesus is coming... big difference... jesus must be rolling in his grave
This from someone who believes neither right? Can people even roll in their graves if you don't believe in movement among the dead?

We know Jesus and his preaching by what is mentioned of Him in Scripture. You don't have to buy it, but this doesn't mean ironknee is right and populist Christian thought and scholarship is wrong on the Bible;

- John 14:3; And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.

- Matthew 16:27; For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father's glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what he has done.
ebuddy
     
ironknee
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Jul 16, 2008, 10:39 PM
 
Mark 9:1
And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That there be some of them that stand here, which shall not taste of death, till they have seen the kingdom of God come with power.

Luke 9:27
But I tell you of a truth, there be some standing here, which shall not taste of death, till they see the kingdom of God.
     
lpkmckenna
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Jul 16, 2008, 11:15 PM
 
Originally Posted by ironknee View Post
Mark 9:1
And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That there be some of them that stand here, which shall not taste of death, till they have seen the kingdom of God come with power.
This is a very widely misunderstood saying. Let me explain it...

"Kingdom of God" is a rather poor translation. A better translation is "God's Reign" or even "God's Justice."

"God's Reign coming with power" refers to God destroying Jerusalem for rejecting his chosen Messiah. Some of Jesus' followers did live to see that event. The parable of the Wicked Tenants from Mark 12 is also a reference to this destruction as Jerusalem's punishment.

Both that parable and Jesus' prediction were invented by Mark to explain the destruction of Jerusalem. That's what apocalyptic literature is all about: explaining history. "Christians" of that era were already trying to understand why God let Jesus die, and after the destruction of Jerusalem, Mark very creatively linked Jesus' death and Jerusalem's end, explaining two troublesome events in one story. Smart guy, that Mark.
     
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Jul 16, 2008, 11:52 PM
 
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.
     
Helmling
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Jul 17, 2008, 12:24 AM
 
Originally Posted by Randman View Post
I thought this had to do with the iPhone 2.0 software.

I thought he was talking about The Dark Knight coming out on Friday.
     
Helmling
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Jul 17, 2008, 12:26 AM
 
Originally Posted by ironknee View Post
Mark 9:1
And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That there be some of them that stand here, which shall not taste of death, till they have seen the kingdom of God come with power.

Luke 9:27
But I tell you of a truth, there be some standing here, which shall not taste of death, till they see the kingdom of God.
Oh, BURN!

P.S. This thread gets my nomination for stupidest of the summer. Anyone else?
     
Helmling
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Jul 17, 2008, 12:31 AM
 
Originally Posted by Luca Rescigno View Post
When I heard about this a couple months ago I learned that what happens is they have a bunch of Christians running the thing that must log in every day. If enough of them go 3 or 5 days (don't remember the exact number) without logging in, it sends the emails.

Seems pretty arrogant, though, for the "blessed" people to point and laugh at the ones who didn't make it. And of course it only works if enough of the people working for this service get raptured.
This is the whole point of this form of Christianity. These people don't want to follow Christ, they simply want to congratulate themselves for being holy. The harsh truth is that demographically these are the same people who sneer at welfare as "entitlement" and say the poor are lazy and should support themselves while also backing an American foreign policy based on preemptive strikes and projected force.

These are not the ideals espoused in the New Testament. Believe me, if Jesus comes back, even little atheist me will be way ahead in line from these holier-than-thou hypocrites.
     
Monique
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Jul 21, 2008, 12:35 PM
 
Rapture is the best comedy a desperate conservative Christian wrote (meaning the worst sinner ever who loves to judge and throw children in the fire of damnation).
     
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Jul 21, 2008, 09:57 PM
 
[Insert "Oh crap, not another Moniquism" image]
     
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Jul 21, 2008, 11:57 PM
 
Glad to see she's still alive and kickin'.
     
Laminar
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Jul 22, 2008, 12:00 AM
 
Originally Posted by Randman View Post
If the good people are taken to Heaven and the bad are left here on Earth, the new Hell, then why would you want to email them anyways? Only reason I could see would be to say "SUCKER!" but then again, that probably would put them with the bad people.
I believe that the idea is that a person that's been "raptured" has a chance to let loved ones know what has happened and what to expect. based on their understanding of what the Bible says is happening. It's not a "SUCKER!" as much as it is a warning of what's to come. And I feel like someone that would pay money to say "SUCKER!" might be surprised at who's raptured and who is not.
     
Atomic Rooster
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Jul 22, 2008, 12:02 AM
 
From OldManMac's sig.

Religion is the race's first (and worst) attempt to make sense of reality. It was the best the species could do at a time when we had no concept of physics, chemistry, biology or medicine. Hitchens.

But I agree, If you can separate a sucker from his money legally, so be it.

Evangelical preachers do it with great fervor.
( Last edited by Atomic Rooster; Jul 22, 2008 at 01:39 AM. )
     
Railroader
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Jul 22, 2008, 12:35 AM
 
Originally Posted by Atomic Rooster View Post
But I agree, I you can separate a sucker from his money legally, so be it.
Me too.

I wonder how many books Dawkins has sold?
     
Apemanblues
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Jul 22, 2008, 05:07 AM
 
The idea of 'The rapture' is clearly bollocks. Along with the afterlife, ghosts and winged people.

I know bollocks when I hear it, and all that stuff is bollocks.
     
osiris
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Jul 22, 2008, 09:51 AM
 
Why would I need to prepare for a Debbie Harry song?
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Uncle Doof
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Jul 22, 2008, 10:31 AM
 
Originally Posted by Apemanblues View Post
The idea of 'The rapture' is clearly bollocks. Along with the afterlife, ghosts and winged people.

I know bollocks when I hear it, and all that stuff is bollocks.
Well, since I've actually seen a ghost, you're clearly wrong about that one. So what if you're wrong about the other stuff too?
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Uncle Doof
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Jul 22, 2008, 10:33 AM
 
Originally Posted by osiris View Post
Why would I need to prepare for a Debbie Harry song?
Ear plugs and muffs so you can't hear it. Obvious really.
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Apemanblues
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Jul 22, 2008, 11:19 AM
 
Floaty disembodied dead people? Are you kidding me?

Seriously. You know it's bollocks.
( Last edited by Apemanblues; Jul 22, 2008 at 11:32 AM. )
     
Apemanblues
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Jul 22, 2008, 11:24 AM
 
Double bubble ding dong dee dooh dahs
     
Uncle Doof
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Jul 22, 2008, 11:31 AM
 
Originally Posted by Apemanblues View Post
Floaty dead people? Are you kidding me?
Translucent people in frock-coats. Now, either Daniel Day Lewis had something really bad for breakfast that day or it was a ghost. And I wasn't alone either - both of us saw it.

I don't reckon they're dead though. More like misaligned in time. Rip in the continuum, etc..

Not bollocks. Saw it with me own two eyes.
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Apemanblues
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Jul 22, 2008, 11:35 AM
 
Originally Posted by Uncle Doof View Post
Translucent people in frock-coats. Now, either Daniel Day Lewis had something really bad for breakfast that day or it was a ghost. And I wasn't alone either - both of us saw it.

I don't reckon they're dead though. More like misaligned in time. Rip in the continuum, etc..

Not bollocks. Saw it with me own two eyes.
I'm calling utter bollocks on that one. Sorry Casper.

However, If you are interested, I do have some magic beans for sale. Expensive ones mind.
     
Uncle Doof
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Jul 22, 2008, 11:44 AM
 
Originally Posted by Apemanblues View Post
I'm calling utter bollocks on that one. Sorry Casper.
So you're calling me a liar then. Righto.

Originally Posted by Apemanblues View Post
However, If you are interested, I do have some magic beans for sale. Expensive ones mind.
There's a bloke in Downing Street who'll have those off you. Probably pay you double for them too, since he's really good at buying and selling things.
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Apemanblues
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Jul 22, 2008, 12:10 PM
 
Nah, I'm not calling you a liar. People 'see' and think they see all manner of crazy stuff. I hope your happy and good luck to you. However, ghosts, goblins, unicorns, astrology, the afterlife, angels, witchcraft, homeopathy, the rapture, telekinesis bigfoot, and the tooth fairy ...are all bollocks. The whole damn shebang. Bollocks all the way.

I Wish it weren't bollocks. Then I could hunt vampires, behead zombies and battle the minions of Gozer. I'd love that.

But it is. It's bollocks.
( Last edited by Apemanblues; Jul 22, 2008 at 12:46 PM. )
     
 
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