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You are here: MacNN Forums > Community > MacNN Lounge > Political/War Lounge > Politics, the Great Divider (Families and Friends Editition)

Politics, the Great Divider (Families and Friends Editition)
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Laminar
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Jan 20, 2020, 10:03 AM
 
Bloomberg - 12
Steyer - 12
Klobuchar - 11
Yang - 11

A Steyer ad popped up while we were watching something on YouTube and my 7 year old said, "Oh, he's lying." I'm sorry...how to you know that? "Grandma and Grandpa told me that everyone running for president except for Donald Trump is a liar."

     
andi*pandi
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Jan 20, 2020, 02:41 PM
 
How did you react to that vis a vis the grandparents?

a) Hey mom and dad, don't talk politics with the kids.
b) hey in laws, nice knowing you.
c) if both: Whelp, time to look into nursing homes.
     
Waragainstsleep
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Jan 20, 2020, 08:34 PM
 
Give your kid permission to swear only speaking about Trump. Then if the grandparents mention Trump again, the child can respond "Donald Trump is a lying piece of shit and an actual turd would make a better and more respectable president."
I have plenty of more important things to do, if only I could bring myself to do them....
     
Laminar  (op)
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Jan 20, 2020, 10:44 PM
 
Originally Posted by andi*pandi View Post
How did you react to that vis a vis the grandparents?
We're trying to figure that out now. We've left the kids there on a weekend only to find out later that they took the kids to a political rally. My kids ended up in a promo video for a candidate that I don't support.

Went to pick the kids up this summer and saw a child-sized MAGA hat sitting on the front porch. No one talked about it, it sure as hell wasn't coming home with us. And I went through both parents' phones to make sure there were no pictures of my kids wearing it.

I've already unfriended my dad from Facebook, I have a strict three-strikes rule where if I see three posts that are untrue, unkind, or unhelpful to promoting civil discourse, you get unfriended. My mom is on strike two (the last thing she posted was some horrid scaremongering about how Muslim men are allowed to marry 1 year olds and consummate the marriage).

We've never gone so far as to have the conversation with them, but I suspect it's going to happen this year.
     
OreoCookie
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Jan 20, 2020, 10:52 PM
 
Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
We're trying to figure that out now. We've left the kids there on a weekend only to find out later that they took the kids to a political rally. My kids ended up in a promo video for a candidate that I don't support. […]
Ooooooh boy.
Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
We've never gone so far as to have the conversation with them, but I suspect it's going to happen this year.
That doesn't sound very healthy. Personally, I'd focus on my children and tell them that love is not contingent on political opinions, but you and your parents have very different political ideas. But I'd also talk to my parents about respecting political differences and your boundaries as parents. Personally, going to a rally is one thing, but them giving permission on your behalf to appear in promo videos is definitely crossing the line.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
     
andi*pandi
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Jan 21, 2020, 10:14 AM
 
If they are choosing to take your children to a rally instead of a baseball game, chuck e cheese, the park, or any other zillion available more suitable choices, it is purposeful. Sorry to hear.

meanwhile my 80yo mother has learned how to spot trolls on facebook political threads. In a way, proud of her.
     
Thorzdad
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Jan 21, 2020, 03:15 PM
 
There's nothing innocent about what the grands are doing. There need to be strict limits laid-down. This is your child, not theirs. You have every right and responsibility to delineate what they can, and cannot, expose your kid to. I don't suspect it will be easy, though.
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subego
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Jan 21, 2020, 03:58 PM
 
Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
untrue, unkind, or unhelpful
As a total aside, I heard an interesting argument it can be okay for a post to be one of these things, but the presence of one makes the other two strictly off limits.

Sorry the parents (of all people) are the context.
     
Laminar  (op)
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Jan 22, 2020, 01:59 PM
 
Originally Posted by andi*pandi View Post
If they are choosing to take your children to a rally instead of a baseball game, chuck e cheese, the park, or any other zillion available more suitable choices, it is purposeful. Sorry to hear.
It was this, so less of a stadium speech-type rally, and more of a bbq with racists.

I know I've talked about my parents before, but they've always been gay-marriage-and-abortion-Evangelical Republicans. They went off the deep end during this last election cycle and now that my dad is retired he has all day to browse Facebook and get fired up by all of the thinly-veiled propaganda. My mom is still a school teacher and he has asked her if she wants a gun. Because that's the solution to all of the school shootings.

At one point while I was traveling, my wife picked up the kids and it somehow came up that we don't hate gay people. That's the closest we've come to outing ourselves as dirty hippy liberals.
     
reader50
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Jan 22, 2020, 02:44 PM
 
That link is light on specific policy positions. I usually won't vote for a politician who avoids stating their positions in detail. Instead, we get "follow Trump", "strong foreign policy", and "maintain vet benefits". The first two are mutually exclusive. She doesn't seem to have ideas of her own, just supports the party herd.

Your parents may be under the impression you support all (most?) of the same things they do. Perhaps even think you deputized them to indoctrinate the next generation.

I agree you need to discuss some things with them, and if still on speaking terms, set boundaries involving your kids.
     
andi*pandi
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Jan 22, 2020, 02:44 PM
 
Not the Trump rally I was envisioning, but still.

In the game of intrafamily political chess, your next move is clearly to post pictures of the whole family at a pride parade. Or a Pete rally?

(cue war games ending)

     
subego
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Jan 22, 2020, 04:02 PM
 
My dad has gone off the deep-end in the other direction. He watches MSNBC all day, and all it does is rattle his cage.

He’s in his mid-70s, and stated at dinner that Trump is ruining the end of his life (males in the family tend to die early). Obviously, this is an order of magnitude less than the situation here, but I find it sad. I wish he would decide to eject from politics.

I’m hardly a Trump supporter, but I’m closer to one than he’d probably feel comfortable with, so I mostly keep my mouth shut.

When I mentioned I still like Bernie, he thought for a second I said Trump. Judging by the look on his face, for a few moments his world was shattered by it.

Again, not like the situation here... just sad he’s so torn up.
     
Laminar  (op)
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Jan 22, 2020, 04:51 PM
 
Originally Posted by reader50 View Post
That link is light on specific policy positions. I usually won't vote for a politician who avoids stating their positions in detail. Instead, we get "follow Trump", "strong foreign policy", and "maintain vet benefits". The first two are mutually exclusive. She doesn't seem to have ideas of her own, just supports the party herd.
Rank and file republican, following the party line. Someone made a website calling her out: https://www.phonyjoni.com/

The funny part is my parents would scroll down that entire list and it would affirm their choice to support her - they want all of those thing to happen.
     
Laminar  (op)
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Jan 22, 2020, 05:10 PM
 
Originally Posted by andi*pandi View Post
Not the Trump rally I was envisioning, but still.

In the game of intrafamily political chess, your next move is clearly to post pictures of the whole family at a pride parade. Or a Pete rally?
I took pics of us caucusing for Bernie in 2016 but never posted them anywhere. Except maybe here? Yep, found it. That was the day that CTP and the other resident conservatives turned on me.
     
OreoCookie
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Jan 23, 2020, 11:08 PM
 
Originally Posted by Laminar View Post
I took pics of us caucusing for Bernie in 2016 but never posted them anywhere. Except maybe here? Yep, found it. That was the day that CTP and the other resident conservatives turned on me.
Also for this reason you don't want your kids in the (literal) picture — or video. Their political views aren't formed yet, and they should decide for themselves, when they are old enough, whether they want to have their face associated with a particular candidate.

Dealing with family that has fundamentally different views is hard. You love them. But on the other hand, if your views are far enough apart, it can put serious strain on your relationship. My sister has moved surprisingly far to the right over the last few years, and talking to her about politics has become quite difficult — we can do it, but we really have to be careful and respect our differences.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
     
   
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