[SOLIDAge]

Backstory: this cat is always around our house...it sucks. We sick our dogs on it ALL the time, and it just comes back ALWAYS...we leave our garage door open for two seconds...its in there...

apparently...after work last night, i left our front door a little opened...I was woken up at 7am and told that the cat was in the back room. So i woke up, saw this MONSTER of a cat and tried to get the bastard out of the room...it then went crazy and started jumpping at windows that weren't open (shoulda opened it em first i guess)

Now it is wedged behind a HUGE oak desk that i can't even beging imagining how to move it to get this cat out.

so what should i do? this fat bastard is WEDGED behind this desk w/ no signs of getting our or of being comfortable...(i know cats can get in everwhere and get out...but i'm not sure about this)...

how do i get this animal out of my house?!?! (as you can tell i am CERTAINLY not a cat person...)

[philzilla]

stop being an over-reacting jerk, for a start. it's not godzilla who's wandered in, looking for people to eat. jeez. just leave it and make sure it can find the way out

[mishap]

maybe if you didnt freak out ... it wouldnt be stuck


i think you'll have to get some cage, or maybe a box, and scare it so it will actually run in there... and remove it.

catnip may help

[lil'babykitten]

I knew one of my killer kitties was missing, how'd it get all the way over there?
Look just shout out 'LBK' and it'll know what to do.

...

On a more serious note, try bating it with food...or string....cats go crazy over string.
It's no biggy, cats like to play games, it'll get bored soon.

[voyageur]

Sounds like someone's lost pet. He's sounds very lost and frightened. Treat him right. Put ads up on your street and in the local paper.

[Spliffdaddy]

heh.

It's *your* cat now.

You didn't think all those millions of cat owners accepted the responsibility willingly...did you?

Being a cat owner is not a choice you make. It's a choice the cat makes.

PS

leave him be. that's his spot behind the desk.

[SOLIDAge]

Originally posted by philzilla:
stop being an over-reacting jerk, for a start. it's not godzilla who's wandered in, looking for people to eat. jeez. just leave it and make sure it can find the way out

it IS gozilla...you haven't seen the size of it, i guess we'll just leave the door shut all night and see if it can get out...but i really think he's completly stuck...

[nate_02]

Too bad it didn't make you green eggs and ham for breakfast.

[Zoom_zoom]

Every time you masturbate, god kills a kitten.. nuf said

[ryju]

Originally posted by Spliffdaddy:

Being a cat owner is not a choice you make. It's a choice the cat makes.

Amen to that brother! Now if you'll all excuse me..I have to clean some litter boxes...

[xi_hyperon]

Originally posted by Spliffdaddy:
[B]Being a cat owner is not a choice you make. It's a choice the cat makes.
/B]

This is true! A kitten picked me and my daughter a week ago. We're still in training, but he seems satisfied with our service so far.

SOLIDAge: Let him be. If he is stuck, and you don't feel comfortable extracting him yourself, seek help from someone who is familiar with cats and has some patience (it will take some if he is afraid).

[kikkoman]

Pour some water on it. I'm sure that will get it moving.








I'm kidding of course

[SOLIDAge]

Originally posted by kikkoman:
Pour some water on it. I'm sure that will get it moving.








I'm kidding of course

humm
i have plenty of spray bottles thanks to being a reptile owner....muahahah

[chris v]

Open the window, then leave the room, closing the door behind you. It won't sit there forever. It'll get hungry and leave before too long.

I heard someone ask a fireman once if they really did ever rescue cats from trees. his reply: "Have you ever seen a cat skeleton in a tree?"


CV

[Spliffdaddy]

If the cat doesn't leave your house after a few days, just ask pooka to stop by.

here kitty

kitty...

kitty?

[D'Espice]

Oh c'mon, you're clearly overreacting The kitty chose you as its rightful owner and bitch, and all you can do is deal with it - ever seen a cat change its mind? See, there ya go

[SOLIDAge]

over my dead body are we adopting this cat!
thats not going to happen!
anyway i came home today from school...it looks pretty stuck and now the room smells of piss...it does look scared...but i mean wtf? i tried the water on it...didn't move because i don't think it can...but i guess if it got itself in there...it can get out.

[sketch]

Since you can't move the desk, can't you call animal control?

[chris v]

There is no desk so big that it cannot be moved. You just need to apply engineering to the problem. Get a neighbor or two to help move it or something, if the cat really is physically stuck. If it dies back there, you'll fell a little sad, won't you?

CV

[philzilla]

i'd say most of the people in this thread could coax kitty out within 5 minutes, maximum.

[-Q-]

Kitty is stuck. If it's in the same spot, it can't get itself out. Be a good person and help kitty. And by virtue of kitty being scared and stuck, he/she will probably not come back to your place.

[lil'babykitten]

peekaboo

[Mediaman_12]

Originally posted by chris v:
There is no desk so big that it cannot be moved. You just need to apply engineering to the problem. Get a neighbor or two to help move it or something, if the cat really is physically stuck. If it dies back there, you'll fell a little sad, won't you?

CV

and if you'r complaining about a piss smell now, just imagine what a dead cat starts to smell like.

[chris v]

Originally posted by Mediaman_12:
and if you'r complaining about a piss smell now, just imagine what a dead cat starts to smell like.

One cannot possibly hang enough air fresheners form the ceiling to properly mask the potential aroma.

CV

[AppleCello]

if it is stuck, it will need water or it might die. than you will be arrested for abusing the animal.

[kikkoman]

Post a picture!

[SOLIDAge]

mother TRUCKER thats a heavy desk...
its pretty much moved so that it now has 1inch on its left and right side so there is NO reason that bitch can't get out....for real!
it has Twenty minutes before i go to work, and before the dogs get called in...tried to get it out w/ milk, and with a broom...it does not want to move.

[philzilla]

Originally posted by SOLIDAge:
it has Twenty minutes before i go to work, and before the dogs get called in...tried to get it out w/ milk, and with a broom...it does not want to move.

okay, now you are just being a complete moron.

you're hiding somewhere. you can see the person you're waiting for. would YOU just stroll out? or would you wait until you thought the coast was clear and you spied an open window?

i'm gonna paypal you money to buy a brain, so you can answer that properly.

[AppleCello]

shave it.

[SOLIDAge]

Originally posted by philzilla:
okay, now you are just being a complete moron.

you're hiding somewhere. you can see the person you're waiting for. would YOU just stroll out? or would you wait until you thought the coast was clear and you spied an open window?

i'm gonna paypal you money to buy a brain, so you can answer that properly.

i work with animals daily, and i love them all, and i do feel bad for them. I see some animals in pretty rough shape either by miscare or whatever...I do feel bad for them...I have taken in MORE sick reptiles then you could imagine, and we rescued my lab from certain death, i'm not some soul-less animal hater.

i DO NOT feel bad for an animal that has CONSTANTLY been at my house, has NOT learned to not come back...and is now stuck because of its own stupidity...we aren't feeding it! it we have nothing to offer! we couldn't adopt it even if we felt the need to! two people that live here are allergic to cats!...
this isn't a flame war on you zilla, flame wars accomplish nothing, its the simple fact that i do not want it there...it trashed the room, and now as you can see from the pictures MORE CRAP has fallen due to moving the desk.

The cat now has ample room to move...we'll see...but i mean this specticle has gone on long enough.


Where the damned thing was stuck.


See? moved desk has plenty of room.

[awaspaas]

Originally posted by SOLIDAge:
mother TRUCKER thats a heavy desk...
its pretty much moved so that it now has 1inch on its left and right side so there is NO reason that bitch can't get out....for real!
it has Twenty minutes before i go to work, and before the dogs get called in...tried to get it out w/ milk, and with a broom...it does not want to move.

Milk or a broom won't work. You need meat or fish or something GOOD. Be calm and quiet - the more you try to force it out the more it will get scared and hide there. Does it have a collar? If you absolutely need to get it out now, throw a blanket over it and pick it up if you can get to it.

[palmberg]

Originally posted by Spliffdaddy:
You didn't think all those millions of cat owners accepted the responsibility willingly...did you?

"Cat owners" and "responsibility" in the same sentence! I guess I really have seen it all....

[cjrivera]

Shoot it.
Stab it.
Put explosives in it's eye sockets and blow it up.
Chop it's head off.
Pour hot sauce on its and then pour flesh eating ants on him.

(There are many other ways, you just have to watch more Itchy & Scratchy cartoons)



On a serious note, can you tempt it out with catnip or a toy or something?

[lil'babykitten]

he looks quite comfy!

[scaught]

aww. littew catten wants some wuv! snuggawy huggawy wuvvins!

[cough] i was referring to the cat in the picture, your snuggawy huggawy wuvvins can be arranged later, LBK [/cough]

[Mastrap]

Bloody hell. And you work with animals? Poor thing. Hungry, scared and it had to piss itself because you didn't have the brains to help it.

One of the problems with cats is that the body language a human who doesn't like cats uses tells an entirely different story to the cat. Looking away, not making eye contact etc tells the cat: 'I am friendly'.

If you really don't like cats a humane way to keep them off your property is citrus oil. Cats hate the smell of anything citrus related and will try to avoid the area.

[dreilly1]

Sounds like you ought to get a cat-loving friend over (who no doubt smells like another cat) to coax the kitty out, as some have suggested. You might also want to call a local vet for suggestions. Maybe even lure it out with catnip.

I'm not sure if it pays to put up fliers. Once the cat leaves, it knows the way home, and can go home if it wants to. Besides, if the cat's owners want it back, they can put up the fliers for you to find!

After the kitty is gone, get a dog. I guarantee you won't have a cat problem anymore. We can't even say the word "cat" around the house, we say "Canine Anger Triggers" or "Canine Activity Triggers", shortened to "C.A.T.'s"...

[Tomster]

Do you have a set of golf clubs? I recommend a sand wedge.

[lil'babykitten]

Originally posted by scaught:
aww. littew catten wants some wuv! snuggawy huggawy wuvvins!

[cough] i was referring to the cat in the picture, your snuggawy huggawy wuvvins can be arranged later, LBK [/cough]

[SOLIDAge]

Originally posted by dreilly1:


After the kitty is gone, get a dog. I guarantee you won't have a cat problem anymore. We can't even say the word "cat" around the house, we say "Canine Anger Triggers" or "Canine Activity Triggers", shortened to "C.A.T.'s"...

...i have Two dogs...
this cat doesn't learn...

[Captain Obvious]

Originally posted by SOLIDAge:

The cat now has ample room to move...we'll see...but i mean this specticle has gone on long enough.



See? moved desk has plenty of room.

Plenty of room for you to be able to get a can of gravy, open it, pour it over the cat, and let your dogs out.

[daimoni]

.

[Immortal K-Mart Employee]

Originally posted by SOLIDAge:
it IS gozilla...you haven't seen the size of it, i guess we'll just leave the door shut all night and see if it can get out...but i really think he's completly stuck...

You are scared of a big cat?

Stop being a macho idiot and calmly try to get the cat out. The poor thing probably doesn't have a home.

[The Placid Casual]

Originally posted by Immortal K-Mart Employee:
You are scared of a big cat?

Stop being a macho idiot and calmly try to get the cat out. The poor thing probably doesn't have a home.

Exactly.

If you close the door, put down some food or water and leave a window open or something, it will probably leave on it's own.

[dreilly1]

Originally posted by SOLIDAge:
...i have Two dogs...
this cat doesn't learn...

Well then, move the desk enough so the dogs can get back there. That'll get the cat to move!

stupid question: are you sure it's alive??!??!?

[OwlBoy]

Aww SOLID, be nice...

-Owl

[Tulkas]

For gods sake just use your arm and drag the thing out. Even if it is some sort of fire-breating-killer-cat the worth thats going to happen is your going to have a few scratches.

[d4nth3m4n]

seriously, go for the scruff of the neck, drag the thing outside...

to hell with the baiting, luring, trapping, just grab it and be done with it.

[SOLIDAge]

well i just went to class...left apiece of chicken by the window...didn't seem to entice the cat at all...

as freakin' luck would have it, as leaving for class, i walk outside and whats in my garage?!?! A NEW CAT!!! one i've never seen before! why oh why god.

[d4nth3m4n]

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! im sorry, but thats great.