Hi everyone,
I don't know if this will be of any use, but since I have read a few very insightful and interesting and profound threads around here, I thought I'd give it a try:
Let's make up a situation, as abstract as possible, so everyone can imagine what I mean:
There are three people sitting there, having a discussion. Two of the three people are girls, the other one is a guy. The girls are best friends and the guy and one girl are, but the guy and the other girl are not. They have 90 minutes to kill before they leave for the movies. What happens? They have one of the strangest discussions that can be imagined. The problem that arises is that normal, superficial topics are inappropriate, since the relations between almost everyone, except one relation, is so deep. Yet, very profound topics are out of the question, since the two that don't know each other so well don't even have a very good relationship.
In fact, of the two, the girl stated right at the start of the discussion that she promised her ladyfriend that she will be nice (which was taken as an insult by the guy immediately, obviously).

Now, during the course of the discussion, they try various topics, almost all are ended all of the sudden by some weird comment by the one girl that said the bad thing at the beginning that does not have a good relationship with the guy. She who says things like how bad she feels having to deal with certain people and the boy, obviously, immediately considers if this is pointed to him, but even if it was, what is he supposed to answer to such a statement that just rests in the air like a bubble and awaits to be touched,?Yet one just can't make more out of it than it is already...

After the evening, that best ladyfriend of the boy tells him how badly he behaved, that he did really bad things, that she is about to break up the whole relationship - yet she doesn't specify what the heck she is talking about and consequently, the poor guy is now just sitting there and thinking about what he might have done that he just doesn't see.

Are guys just so imperfect not to notice nuances that make other people want to break up even extremely deep friendships? Are girls sometimes so dumb that they just accept their truths and that they don't look at things that they might have ignited on their own?
Is everyone in this discussion just so naive that it, eventually, just couldn't have worked out anyway?

What's happening? Tell me what you think, please.

Steve

[quandarry]

they are lesbians...find someone else.

[Shaddim]

Originally posted by quandarry:
they are lesbians...find someone else.

Yup.

They are not.

[:XI:]

Originally posted by SteveJobs:
Are guys just so imperfect not to notice nuances that make other people want to break up even extremely deep friendships? Are girls sometimes so dumb that they just accept their truths and that they don't look at things that they might have ignited on their own?
Is everyone in this discussion just so naive that it, eventually, just couldn't have worked out anyway?

Yes. Probably. Who knows.

[effgee]

(...) that she promised her ladyfriend that she will be nice (...)

From how you describe the situation, neither of the two is your friend - imagine what your "friend" must have told her friend about you that she had to promise to be friendly. If it happened exactly the way you told the story here, ditch 'em because they're both shallow bitches.

[:XI:]

Originally posted by effgee:
From how you describe the situation, neither of the two is your friend - imagine what your "friend" must have told her friend about you that she had to promise to be friendly. If it happened exactly the way you told the story here, ditch 'em because they're both shallow bitches.

[ambush]

can someone sum the story up, I read it twice and I don't get what's happening..
thanks..

[effgee]

Uhm, let's see ... three people about to go to the movies, they have an hour and a half to kill before they need to leave ...

- dude A
- chick B (dude A's good friend)
- chick C (good friends with chick B, but not with dude A)

During the course of an obviously awkward conversation, chick C mentions (among other inappropriate things) that beforehand she had promised to chick B that she'd be "nice" to dude A (whom she didn't even know). Following the weird conversation, they go see the movie.

After the movie has ended, chick B tells dude A that she's very upset with him since he behaved so badly during the course of the conversation before they went to the theater (even though chick C behaved like a real bitch) and that, as a consequence of dude A's behavior, she's thinking about breaking off the friendship with dude A.

Recommended course of action + moral of the story (if that's exactly how it happened): Dude A goes his own ways and tells chick B and chick C to go fsck themselves because they're both quite full of it ...

Better?

edited, because I can't type worth a doo-doo

[deekay1]

Originally posted by effgee:
Uhm, let's see ...

good summary

my take: chick b has a "bad conscience", since she is friends with both dude a and chick c. she knows that her girlfriend's a total cvnt but doesn't know how to deal with the situation at hand, - thus decides to behave like a complete biaaaatch herself!

typical female behaviour. think nothing of it. if she is worth it, she'll come back and apologize. if not, forget about her!

[:XI:]

I really would like to know what Dude A said. Might completely change the argument.

[Eciton]

Beats the hell out of me - not enough detail, really. If it still baffles the original poster, the best bet is probably just to either:

a) ask B what is going on. What's the worst that could happen?

b) leave time to sort things out. If it doesn't, just accept that these things happen, shrug, grin and move on.

In my experience, when things bother me or I can't figure a situation out I think 'what the heck' and say something. Shutting up the internal debate and questioning, just blurting something out tends to move the situation to a new position from which you might be able to see things clearly. If there's too much risk with that then just sit tight and let the other parties in the situation move it along.

[wdlove]

Originally posted by :XI::
I really would like to know what Dude A said. Might completely change the argument.

I was wondering that myself. Exactly did the Dude have to say that upset Chick B so much.

[ASIMO]

Yet another socratic moment on MacNN.

Or MacNN's version of daytime drama.

[Face Ache]

"As the wait cursor turns".

You didn't think to ask them "what's going on?"

But then you ask us.



Magic 8 Ball says: Someone will score a threesome with B and C. It won't be you.

[ASIMO]

Have you any idea how wonderful threesomes can be? It truly is greater than the sum of its parts.

Just be careful and pick wisely.

[hyteckit]

Did Dude A get to 3rd base with Chick B? Was Chick B and Chick C on 3rd base with one another? Did anyone score a homerun? Did Dude A strike out and Chick B and C decided to join another team?

I'm confuse.

[rjenkinson]

Originally posted by hyteckit:
Did Dude A get to 3rd base with Chick B? Was Chick B and Chick C on 3rd base with one another? Did anyone score a homerun? Did Dude A strike out and Chick B and C decided to join another team?

"who's on first?"

-r.

[Kilbey]

I came up with "42".

What did you guys get?