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Meeting people my age...
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boy8cookie
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Jul 13, 2009, 10:19 PM
 
Hello MacNN,

I don't often post here, mostly I just read through the threads, both for amusement and information. I am posting now because I need help. I'm 20 years old, I live with my mother, and I work full time. I pay rent, buy my own food, and pay my own bills. We share a car, but my mother doesn't drive much so I can use it pretty freely. I don't really enjoy living with my mother, but its affordable, and easy. Being in Hawaii is expensive, the cost of living is outrageous, I've lived here all my life, but I don't know if I can be all I want to be here.

My problem is this, I'm 20 years old, and I don't have any real friends. I don't know where to meet people my age. I'm not old enough to hangout in a bar, and I'm not sure that's the best way to meet friends. The few friends I did have recently moved to the mainland, so I'm feeling very alone. I'm working full time, when most people my age are in college, I guess. My co-workers are nice, but they're my co-workers, and most of them are older than I am. I'm hoping I can get some ideas for meeting people my age, because right now... I feel very alone Your input is appreciated.
     
ApertureValue
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Jul 13, 2009, 11:16 PM
 
That is really a tough one, especially living on an island. Since I don't know how outgoing you are, what your likes and dislikes are, etc., that compounds the difficulty in recommending anything.

However, how are the coffee shops there? What about any types of social clubs for people your age? Are there any open sports available (if you have a favorite)? If you have interests like photography, art, music, literature or similar things, I know that even here in Missouri where I live, there are plenty of groups with some really cool people available.

The key is not to act desperately, take stock of your strong social abilities, and just know what's available in your area that is of interest.
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Cold Warrior
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Jul 13, 2009, 11:25 PM
 
Why not go to college? You'll make some friends there.
     
ApertureValue
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Jul 13, 2009, 11:34 PM
 
Originally Posted by Cold Warrior View Post
Why not go to college? You'll make some friends there.
True. There's another avenue.
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hyteckit
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:05 AM
 
Join a club that shares your interest.

Love Macs? Join a Mac Club.
Love Tennis? Join a tennis club.
Love Dancing? Take some dancing classes.

I'm sure there are a number of people in the same situation looking for the same thing.

I say avoid Craigslist especially the Adult section.
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boy8cookie  (op)
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:16 AM
 
Originally Posted by ApertureValue View Post
That is really a tough one, especially living on an island. Since I don't know how outgoing you are, what your likes and dislikes are, etc., that compounds the difficulty in recommending anything.
This is part of the problem, up until about a week ago, I was addicted to World of Warcraft. I've completely lost interest in the game and anything to do with it. I had been playing it far too much for the past year, as all my real friends moved away. So now, with no interest in playing video games, I don't really know what to do. I enjoy surfing, but I don't know anyone to surf with, and meeting people in the water is usually because you stole their wave and they want to kick your ass. I play basketball with the neighborhood kids/adults after work, but no one there is my age.

However, how are the coffee shops there? What about any types of social clubs for people your age? Are there any open sports available (if you have a favorite)? If you have interests like photography, art, music, literature or similar things, I know that even here in Missouri where I live, there are plenty of groups with some really cool people available.
I play in a basketball league through work, its a total of 12 games over 6 weekends a year. The rest of the people in the league are much older than me (35+). I'm not sure what groups exist, where can I look to find these kinds of things locally?

The key is not to act desperately, take stock of your strong social abilities, and just know what's available in your area that is of interest.
Sound advice, thank you.
     
boy8cookie  (op)
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:17 AM
 
Originally Posted by Cold Warrior View Post
Why not go to college? You'll make some friends there.
My job is very promising, I think. I'm a software engineer for the local cable company, it pays well, the benefits are good and its a secure position. Perhaps night school, just to meet people? I haven't really looked into this.
     
Chuckit
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:31 AM
 
Get a hobby. One of the ones that involves other people. Assuming not everybody in your group of similarly hobbied people is a complete knockerhead — presto! Friends.

Since most people your age are in school, maybe take a cooking or dancing class at a local community college or something. It can be more difficult to make friends if you don't have any shared experiences.
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turtle777
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Jul 14, 2009, 09:01 AM
 
Join some club or association, whatever it is. Sports, crafts, culture, religion, doesn't matter.

Be with people that have a shared interest in something.

-t
     
ort888
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:16 PM
 
Join a cult.

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Salty
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Jul 14, 2009, 01:58 PM
 
Or try a local Church? Half of those are just social clubs anyway! Heck even dating sites can be good for making friends... least if you're someone like me who is great at turning potential romances into awkward friendships that the other people really enjoys.
     
OreoCookie
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Jul 14, 2009, 03:07 PM
 
Move away from home. Seriously. You'll be forced to interact with people your age more regularly if you do things on your own (e. g. by having the proverbial strange room mate).
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
     
boy8cookie  (op)
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Jul 14, 2009, 11:56 PM
 
I appreciate all the feedback, can anyone recommend a website or some directory for finding local clubs like the ones being suggested? Thanks!
     
Doofy
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Jul 18, 2009, 02:32 PM
 
Dude I used to know "met people". That's what he did. Literally.

He'd walk up to someone he didn't know (sometimes a whole table full of people at a bar) and say "Hello, I'm Boon. I meet people". Dude was popular.
Been inclined to wander... off the beaten track.
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turtle777
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Jul 18, 2009, 04:20 PM
 
     
Gavin
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Jul 18, 2009, 10:35 PM
 
check out meetup.com
     
   
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