Welcome to the MacNN Forums.

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

You are here: MacNN Forums > Community > MacNN Lounge > dontevenreply

dontevenreply
Thread Tools
Captain Obvious
Professional Poster
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Chicago
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 08:46 PM
 
E-mails from an Asshole

Immature, sure. Sophomoric, yes. Incredibly funny, absolutely.

Barack Obama: Four more years of the Carter Presidency
     
MacinTommy
Mac Elite
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Denver, CO
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 10:27 PM
 
"disguised weapons" ftw
     
brassplayersrock²
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: California
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 10:29 PM
 
^ what he said.
     
Rumor
Moderator
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: on the verge of insanity
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 11:03 PM
 
Nice find. Quite a few good chuckles so far.
I like my water with hops, malt, hops, yeast, and hops.
     
downinflames68
Baninated
Join Date: Jun 2009
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 11:09 PM
 
Heh. This stuff is pretty awesome.
     
dcmacdaddy
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Madison, WI
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 11:54 PM
 
Originally Posted by MacinTommy View Post
"disguised weapons" ftw
Saw this one on Reddit last week. I laughed so hard I woke up my cat.
One should never stop striving for clarity of thought and precision of expression.
I would prefer my humanity sullied with the tarnish of science rather than the gloss of religion.
     
dcmacdaddy
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Madison, WI
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 16, 2010, 11:58 PM
 
"handicapped movers" is a good one as well.
One should never stop striving for clarity of thought and precision of expression.
I would prefer my humanity sullied with the tarnish of science rather than the gloss of religion.
     
Laminar
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Iowa, how long can this be? Does it really ruin the left column spacing?
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 17, 2010, 05:46 AM
 
I'm dying at "Helpful Mechanic"

Original ad:
I have a 1998 nissan that rear ended someone last week. There is some minor damage that need fixed...but I cant afford to go to a body shop..anyone who is willing to help for less would be doing me a HUGE favor. thanks!
From Me to ***********@**********.org

Hey, how's it going.

I'm a mechanic looking to do some work on the side, and I can probably help you out with your car. How bad is the damage to the car?

Mike

From Kristen ****** to Me:

Hi Mike. The damage isnt bad...my hood is bent and i think the headlight cracked...but I took it for an estimate and they told me i was looking at at least a couple thousand for repairs. im not sure if they are trying to rip me off so take a look if you want. sorry...this is the best picture i could get with my phone

thanks!

Attachment:



From Me to Kristen ******:

Ouch...that doesn't look good, Kristen. From glancing at the picture, it is obvious you are going to need a new hood, fender, and headlight. It looks like your headlight is indeed cracked, and it looks like you probably severed the headlight fluid line as well. From the way the hood is bent, it looks like your transmission has been dislodged and will probably have to be replaced. Judging by the headlight damage, I may have to replace your headlight fluid pump as well, and I need to take out the motor to get to that. It is going to be a lot of work.

How much were you looking to spend to get this fixed?

From Kristen ****** to Me:

wow i didnt think it was that bad...do you think you can fix it? i cant afford to spend alot of money on this.

From Me to Kristen ******:

I can absolutely fix it. I can probably steal the parts you'll need from a junkyard, but you will have to post my bail if I get caught again. Last time, bail was about $400 and I had to pay another $500 fine after court. As for the labor, it is going to cost you about $1500. Replacing the headlight fluid pump is very difficult, and will probably take a lot of time to do. So you are looking at anywhere from $1500 to $2400.

From Kristen ****** to Me:

ok thanks anyway. that is too much for me...ill just deal with it for now i guess

From Me to Kristen ******:

Kristen, I strongly advise you to get this fixed immediately. You will not pass inspection without a headlight fluid pump, and it is very dangerous to be driving without one. It is very likely that your car could catch fire and explode while you are driving.

Look, I understand you are on a budget and I'd be willing to knock a couple hundred bucks off of the cost of labor if I can have your car's CD player. You won't get a better deal anywhere else.

From Kristen ****** to Me:

what?! the other guy didnt say anything like that. im going to get a few more opinions first, ill let you know. thanks

From Me to Kristen ******:

Don't take too long - your car is in immediate danger.

From Kristen ****** to Me:

I just called the auto center and they said there is no such thing as a headlight fluid pump...or headlight fluid...they were laughing...what is your problem douche bag?

From Me to Kristen ******:

Whoever you talked to there obviously has no idea what they are talking about. Look, you can see it in the picture, you are clearly leaking headlight fluid. I pointed it out in the attachment, it is what the red arrow is pointing to. You can see it leaking from the headlight.

Attachment:



From Kristen ****** to Me:

Ok ass hole...thanks for wasting my time

From Me to Kristen ******:

Sorry for trying to save your life. You'll be sorry when that fluid ignites and makes your transmission explode while you are driving.
     
brassplayersrock²
Addicted to MacNN
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: California
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 17, 2010, 06:29 AM
 
Seeing how those e-mails are from a Kristen, I see how you find it funny well played sir.
     
Laminar
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Iowa, how long can this be? Does it really ruin the left column spacing?
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 17, 2010, 06:54 AM
 
Originally Posted by brassplayersrock² View Post
Seeing how those e-mails are from a Kristen, I see how you find it funny well played sir.
It was the second picture that made me lose it.
     
voodoo
Posting Junkie
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Salamanca, España
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 17, 2010, 07:57 AM
 
Nice website, though some replies are so fantastic I have trouble believing them, while others are very funny.. I get the feeling that in some instances the people know they are being trolled
I could take Sean Connery in a fight... I could definitely take him.
     
ThinkInsane
Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Feb 2000
Location: Night's Plutonian shore...
Status: Offline
Reply With Quote
Feb 17, 2010, 12:47 PM
 
From Me to Bryan **********

Good afternoon Brian,

Your wife doesn't sound too smart. I was going to recommend Hooked on Phonics, but she seems to be capable of writing. I think she just does not have the ability to comprehend what she is reading. I have a cousin who is "slow", and there is this really good remedial school in Philly that he went to. They offer some classes that help with reading comprehension. If you want, I can look up the school and send the information to your wife.

- Dan

From Bryan ********* to Me

Heh heh, that might be just what she needs...

From Me to Bryan **********
CC: Brittany *********

Great! I'm forwarding our conversation to your wife, along with the school information.

The name of the school is "Smithbridge School for Special People," and you can call them at (***)-***-2195.

From Bryan ********* to Me

Oh boy...please don't...
This one made me lol. There's some good stuff there.
Nemo me impune lacesset
     
   
 
Forum Links
Forum Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Top
Privacy Policy
All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:45 PM.
All contents of these forums © 1995-2017 MacNN. All rights reserved.
Branding + Design: www.gesamtbild.com
vBulletin v.3.8.8 © 2000-2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.,