[Dark_Lotus]

Lately I have been thinking about life and death. I have been asking myself various questions such as "If I died tomorrow how would I be remembered?" This might be morbid, but I have been thinking about death alot, fearing it more and more every time it enters my mind. Hopefully this is just a short stage that I am going through due to a recent loss of someone I knew. Even though I did not know this person very well, his death really affected me. You might think it odd that I am bringing this up on a computer forum, but unfortunetly this is the only place I have left to turn to at this time of day. I have been thinking about how stupid and meaningless some of the things we do in life are, compared to what is really important, such as spending time with family, friends, and truly appreciating what one has in life. We get caught up in our hobbies, interests, and work. All for what? To make money? We take time away from our family and friends to make more and more money. Money that we do not need. There are so many things that I have that I wish I could exchange for more time with family members. I have always neglected going to church and beleiving in god. Is it weird that I want to now? I feel like there needs to be something else in my life to guide me and to help me out when I am feeling like this. I'm sorry if this seems off-topic for some, I just felt that I needed to share my thoughts with atleast one person. Thanks.

[anonymac]

In life there are no real rules. Only those that you give yourself. You wanna know what my rule is? Have sex with as many incredibly hot girls as I possibly can. That way I will be remembered as the person who had sex with all those incredibly hot girls.

[analogika]

anonymac: Fifteen-year-old Windows user on a Mac-centric discussion board.

[anonymac]

Wrong. And I use a PowerBook with Mac OS X.

[analogika]

Wouldn't have known it...

[el chupacabra]

why does it matter how you are remembered? once you are dead it's impossible to care how youre remembered so it doesn't matter. If you were remembered as something great how would that make you happier now?

[anonymac]

So what if I said that? Just because I use Mac OS X, doesn't mean I can't say something else is better. The censors and nazi-like moderators on macnn just can't accept that someone may have thier own independent opinion.

[analogika]

you're going for the win, I see.

[milf]

Save the childish banter for another thread...

Dark_Lotus, I think thoughts of death are reasonable because they keep you grounded. Because death is very real, while all too many of us go through each day taking life for granted. But I think you've already reached an important understanding by realizing what is of most significance to you.

Too many find happiness in their accomplishments, when happiness should be their utmost accomplishment. What is the true value of something that gives you status but makes you miserable or keeps you from what you truly love and enjoy. Oh the hypocrisy -- I struggle with this myself.

Live your life doing whatever it is that makes you happy. It's often easier said than done, but take steps in that direction every day: surround yourself with those you love, feel good about giving, connect with God, laugh at hard times -- whatever you need to do to smile and be happy.

[kick52]

Death: We are all gonna die, deal with it and shutup.

[Big Mac]

Are you a teen? If you are, you should know that it's common for teens to be depressed because of chemical changes occurring in them. The media doesn't like to just portray teens as angst ridden because that's a popular way to portray them - it's the truth, and it's not their fault. If the feelings start to overwhelm you, however, please see a doctor. There's no reason to suffer with it if it's really impairing you, and there are so many effective ways to treat it today.

As for thinking about death, even aside from depression, it's a normal thing for people - and even young people - to think about it. My religion teaches that the fear of death is an inherent trait of our creation to steer us toward good and away from evil in life. My advice is to live your life well, be happy with yourself and try not to dwell on things you do not have control over.

[Randman]

Just wait till one of your parents, or a close relative or friend, dies and you'll find something deathly to relate to. Until then, you never know.

A fatal diagnosis also works but can't be 100% valid.

[♥]

Hope you feel better soon.

Seriously, maybe you should talk to someone, anyone you think you can talk to, face to face.

Sometimes posting here is not the most sympathetic place to "talk" to, even though some of us do understand your feelings. I understand your feelings, for instance. I have often pondered my life and the meaning of it and sometimes have felt hopeless about it in times of stress and grief. What I can tell you is that you should focus more on positive things. Get outside and take a walk or a drive. Go to the park or the zoo or go see a movie. Something to help you snap out of a morbid funk.

You can always pm me if you need to chat more.

[Dark_Lotus]

Some of you guys really helped, glad to know that I'm not the only person out there that thinks about this. Thanks.

[Jawbone54]

I've dealt with some pretty hard deaths over the past 10 years, including that of my nephew. I just spent time in the hospital with a 6-year-old boy in my church who has just been diagnosed with stage IV cancer (neuro blastoma), and the doctors have all but written him off. He's starting chemo today, but we're all praying for a miracle, which would really be his only chance.

Death, even after seeing it first-hand many times, is no easier to understand. As a result of being surrounded by death (I worked at a funeral home and the NICU ward of a hospital), I think I can say that I've learned a lot more about living than I have about dying. I cherish every moment with my two nephews (6 and 2), my family, my wife, and my friends. I've started pursuing more interests that I've pushed aside for years, and I keep markings items off of my list of things to do in my lifetime.

I went through severe depression during my mid to late teens, and spent more time worrying than anything else. I still fight that natural tendency, but it is possible to fight it off. Find something to be passionate about, and dedicate your life to it. Find hobbies that you've never considered. Talk to people with confidence. Smile more. Be friendlier. It all sounds stupid, but it makes for a much happier life. That's my advice to anyone who is depressed and thinks way too often about life/death. I don't have a lot of money, but I'm very happy.

[Atheist]

Aha.. so you've realized you're mortal huh? It happens to the best of us. We are all affected by death yet somehow it seems to come as a surprise. I had the ill fortune of losing my mother while I was still quite young. It's a bitch of a lesson to learn but it has since given me great perspective on life:

1. I will die.
2. Everyone I know and love will die.
3. There is nothing I can do about it.
4. I must live life to the fullest and be the best person I can be.
5. I will find joy in all I do.
6. That's about it.

[♥]

Well, actually, there's more. Some of us believe in an afterlife of some type and that also gives great hope.

[ironknee]

Money, get away.
Get a good job with good pay and youre okay.
Money, its a gas.
Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash.
New car, caviar, four star daydream,
Think Ill buy me a football team.

Money, get back.
Im all right jack keep your hands off of my stack.
Money, its a hit.
Dont give me that do goody good bullshit.
Im in the high-fidelity first class traveling set
And I think I need a lear jet.

Money, its a crime.
Share it fairly but dont take a slice of my pie.
Money, so they say
Is the root of all evil today.
But if you ask for a raise its no surprise that theyre
Giving none away.

[wolfen]

Originally Posted by Dark_Lotus 

Lately I have been thinking about life and death. I have been asking myself various questions such as "If I died tomorrow how would I be remembered?"

Here are some good Near Death Experience sites. I've been researching NDE's for a few weeks now.

This one is a live database of NDE reports. Some are more interesting or informative than others. Individually they don't tell a lot. After you read 10-20 you start to get a better feel of what's going on.

NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE RESEARCH FOUNDATION (NDERF)

This is a particularly detailed account. Unfortunately he uses a Text to Voice audio file with music that sometimes gets in the way of understanding the voice. But there's a text version here you can read along with, or just read instead.

index

Lastly, the NDERF site has a lot of research that has been pieced together using a large number of NDE reports. There is inconsistency across people's experiences, some would say contradictory. But I would account for that by acknowledging that everyone would naturally perceive things differently (since they do on Earth), that different people in different stages of development are headed for different destinations, and that we have different kinds of people on the other side willing to deal with us.

I found the references to "Hell" more informative than some of the more theoretical stuff. So here's that link.

Earthbound - near-death experiences

Good luck, and I hope you find comfort as you confront this issue in your life.

[iMOTOR]

Originally Posted by anonymac 

That way I will be remembered as the person who had sex with all those incredibly hot girls.

You'll be remembered as the selfish fcuk who only took from life and never gave.

To Dark_Lotus:

I think it's pretty normal to think about death. I often wonder about the legacy I will leave behind, it seems like life is way to short and too many opportunities pass you by, you can never be the person you wanted to be.

Just don't worry about death, there's other things to worry about.

[Mastrap]

The only constant is change.

[mac128k-1984]

We all think about death a number of times in our life. Its one of those things that none of us will escape, we all have a date with destiny.

The question is, what happens afterwards, as a Christian and one who believes in the Bible, I personally don't want to experience hell, but rather Heaven. If you open the Bible say to the Gospel of John, you'll see that God has a plan for each of us and wants to you, me and anyone who accepts Jesus to be in fellowship with him. The Bible shows us how to live and what to expect after we live. This plan provides us with a meaning for life, knowing that it all doesn't end here.

[Zeeb]

Originally Posted by Dark_Lotus 

Lately I have been thinking about life and death. I have been asking myself various questions such as "If I died tomorrow how would I be remembered?" This might be morbid, but I have been thinking about death alot, fearing it more and more every time it enters my mind. Hopefully this is just a short stage that I am going through due to a recent loss of someone I knew. Even though I did not know this person very well, his death really affected me. You might think it odd that I am bringing this up on a computer forum, but unfortunetly this is the only place I have left to turn to at this time of day. I have been thinking about how stupid and meaningless some of the things we do in life are, compared to what is really important, such as spending time with family, friends, and truly appreciating what one has in life. We get caught up in our hobbies, interests, and work. All for what? To make money? We take time away from our family and friends to make more and more money. Money that we do not need. There are so many things that I have that I wish I could exchange for more time with family members. I have always neglected going to church and beleiving in god. Is it weird that I want to now? I feel like there needs to be something else in my life to guide me and to help me out when I am feeling like this. I'm sorry if this seems off-topic for some, I just felt that I needed to share my thoughts with atleast one person. Thanks.

I agree with much of what has already been said. However, I'll just add that its fine to take stock of your life every once in awhile and decide how you would like to prioritize things. It sounds like you've decided to spend some more time with family and friends and to also explore your spirituality a little. So do it! There's no need to be sad and you don't need to see a therapist.

Personally, I also enjoy spending time with family and friends and value them highly above everything else. However, I don't want to spend every waking moment with them either since they would drive me nuts. There's nothing wrong with enjoying the small things in life too, like wasting time here or on hobbies and interests. Unless your Gandhi, most normal people live fulfilling lives this way.